Reviewer: BloodyTurtle

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Beauty and the Beast

By @MakaylaDJ7

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Cover/Blurb/Title

Cover • The cover works. It clearly shows that it's a romance, and everything is readable. Maybe add some subtitle, but that's not necessary.

Blurb • The blurb was too short. It barely explains anything, and it really makes the book seem cliche and uninteresting. The whole "nerd and popular" meeting and being "fate" is very cliche. I'd add way more detail to the blurb. Maybe add a quote to it.

Title • The title is highly cliche. It's so overused. On top of that, it doesn't seem to work in the story. Based one that first few chapters "Beauty and the Coward" or "Beauty and the Geek" would be a way better fit. But those still seem cliche.

Descriptions

I couldn't visualize almost everything. I could roughly see people, but that's all. I couldn't see where they were or much else. I wish I could say more, but that's all I've got. You've just got to describe in way more detail. Even the characters need a push, though they were described the greatest.

Characters

The characters were very cliche. The popular girl that people don't actually understand and the nerd. I don't need to say more for that other one. They can be used creatively, but it doesn't seem like they will be. I barely learned anything about the two in the first few chapters, mostly since the chapters were way too short. They don't seem especially special.

Plot/General Writing

The plot is way overused. First day of school, and a nerd and popular kid meet. They instantly fall in love, and, of course, it's fate! But they don't tell each other. Of course, they are both too awkward and distance themselves due to it. And they end up in the same class and such. It's bland. This happens way too much in stories. The pacing is too fast, but only since the events are spaced out well due to the lack of description. I really dislike how they both just automatically like each other.

Grammar

The grammar is somewhat good. A lot of commas are missing, and some are added but unneeded. They are all basic mistakes. You really just need to go over it with a friend or download grammarly on a computer. It works great for these basic mistakes. Of course, you could also hire an editor. They are very helpful.

Reader Engagement

I wasn't very engaged. The cliches just made it a turn off right away. You did end off and start chapters in an interesting way, but I couldn't stomach the characters and plot.

Overall

The story is very cliche. From the title to plot. But you can change this. I'd go over the plot you have in mind and give major twists to the personalities of the characters or make them undergo strong change. Maybe have a twist of having them like different people on the end, but don't give what everyone expects. It can be fixed, but you need to put a lot of elbow grease into this story. But, hey, some people love cliche. I recommend this to anyone looking for a simplistic way to have thrill from love.

1 stars out of 5

Good luck, lollipop!