My eyes started tearing up and I was in shock, everything becoming a blur and suddenly I couldn't hear anything. Is this for real? My phone falls out of my hands into my lap. "No... No, no..." I put my hands on my head and shake my head. This isn't happening right now.

Caro notices and she starts asking me what's wrong. When I didn't answer she turned my face to look at her, a tear rolled down my cheek and her eyes widened.

"What happened?" Concern flushing her face. I don't answer and more tears just fall out of my eyes, I'm still trying to process everything. She grabs my phone and she reads the text. Sadness taking over her concerned face, I can see tears welling in her eyes. "No, this isn't true." She looks at me and she frowns. She hugs me and pats my back. "It's going to be okay." She soothingly says over and over, but her voice cracks in the process.

Tears are coming out even more and now it hit me, she's gone, my best friend is gone. The one person who actually liked my weird introverted self, the one person who I considered my sister was now gone. The one who approached me in kindergarten when she saw me sitting alone. The person who stood up for me, the one who stood by me through being apart for a few years. The one person who never gave up on me and loved me unconditionally was now gone...

*Flashback to 1st week of kindergarten*

The bell rings and it's now recess. I grab my jacket from my cubby and I put on my outdoor shoes. I grabbed my sandwich that I made this morning and a juice box. All of the other kids were running around the halls with their friends, getting ready to go outside. I, on the other hand, was alone. I watched them talk as they exited the building.

I walk out of the building with my food in hand. The other kids like to play on the playground but I didn't like it there since there were too many people. Instead, I like to sit on top of the hill next to the playground.

The hill isn't that big but it big enough that I'll get a view of the other kids swinging on the swings. There's an old tree at the top of the hill which casts a shadow down on the surrounding area, a perfect spot to sit.

I make my way around the playground towards the hill. I don't mind having to walk up the hill, after all, it wasn't that steep anyways. I made it to the top of the hill and I sit down beside the tree, leaning my back on it.

I open up my sandwich and my juice box, I'm gonna have a picnic of my own. I take a huge bite out of my sandwich as I watch the others play. They screamed and laughed as they ran around playing tag. Some going down the slide and some swinging on the swings.

I was sitting there watching, too focused that I didn't even notice someone come up beside me.

"Hi, I'm Vivian. What's your name?" A girl with a squeaky voice said enthusiastically.

Startled, I whip my head around to look at this random girl. I realized that she was my classmate, I barely talked to her. She has jet black hair, and she has these really pretty hazel doll-like eyes. She has on a cute summer dress and she has a lunch box in hand. "Ohh you scared me! I almost dropped my sandwich."

She giggles. "I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to."

"It's fine, my names Zoey."

"Ohh your my classmate right?" I nod my head. "Ahh, we don't really talk much. Your really quiet."

"Yeah I guess I am, I just don't really know how to talk to others."

"Well you're talking to me, and from now on your my best friend!"

"Ohh okay! Do you want to eat some?" I offer her some of my food and she takes some.

We end up sitting there under the tree talking. This girl became my best friend since.

*End of flashback*

Caro pulls out of the hug and grabs my hand and squeezes it as a tear falls down her cheek. "Come, let's go get some fresh air." She grabs my hand and drags me away from the concert. I wasn't processing what was happening but we end up outside on one of the side exits. We were the only ones there. The moon bright and shining down on us as the cold winter wind brushes last me, it was only 6 pm yet the sun has already gone down. It was cold but I could care less right now.

I lean against the wall and slide down as I start bawling. "This isn't happening! She's not gone! She not gone..." My voice dying down at the end. I shake my head and start pulling on my hair.

Caro standing against the railing silently as she cried. She was trying to stay strong for me since she knew how hurt I was.

Caro was closer to Vivian's older sister since apparently, Vee's older sister used to babysit Caro when they were younger. They had a good relationship and Caro looked up to Vee's sister. Vee's parents knew my parents long before the two of us were even born, we only found out 9 years later.

She wiped her tears before coming beside me and hugging me. She whispered soothing words into my hair.

"It's all my fault! It's my fault she's gone!" I cried into Caro's shoulder.

"Shhh, no it's not your fault. It's the drunk driver's fault. You didn't do anything." She hugs me tighter and pats my head.

*Flashback 2*

"You're coming back, right? Please tell me you're coming back?!" Vee cried as she sat down on the floor crying.

"I don't know Vee. I don't know... My parents said that we'll never come back, and I don't know what to do..." I sat down beside her and I myself started crying.

"You can't leave me! I don't know what ill do without you!" She grabbed onto me and started crying into my shoulder.

We're sitting on the floor of my soon-to-be-old bedroom, most of my stuff already packed away. The memories flooded back to me, hitting me like a brick wall.

"Vee, I'll come back! I'll come back no matter how long it takes!" I wiped my tears as I plastered a look of determination on my face.

"You will? Will you remember me?"

"Of course I will! How can I forget you, you're my sister!"

"You promise? Pinky swear?" She stuck out her pinky to me.

I giggled."Pinky swear!" I grabbed her pinky and I squeezed it with mine.

"You better come back!"

"I will don't worry!"

*End of flashback*

"M-my best friends is g-gone, what am I g-gonna do!" I cried my eyes out while trying not to let my heart shatter.

"It's okay, it's okay. She's in a better place now." Caro patted my head.

"She's g-gone! She's gone! I c-couldn't save her! I wasn't even t-there for her!" I grab onto Caro and I cry even more.

"Shh, it's okay, it's okay." Caro pats my back as she also cries even more.

I suddenly got a call from Vee's mom, I answered. "H-hello? Please tell me it's a joke! P-please!" I yelled into the phone.

I heard Vee's mom's fragile voice on the other side. "I'm sorry Zoey, but she's r-really gone. I'm soo sorry..."

When she said that my body went limp and I couldn't stop myself from crying even harder. "No... No! No! She's not gone! She n-not gone..." I scream into the night sky, Caro grabbing onto me.

I cry for a few minutes before taking my phone and seeing if Tita Rachel was still on the line. "Hello? T-tita?"

"Hi my dear, I'm st-till here." She was also crying. "We were watching the show, live. And just after your last performance, she gave in..." Tita Rachel paused. "I guess she just waited to see you perform before leaving." She sobbed. "I bet she is super proud of you! She would be soo happy to see you!" She sobbed even more.

I cried even more. I started thinking of what Vee's reaction would be.

*Imagination*

"Omg! No way! We're performing at the GMAS!" I imagine her jumping around doing her little happy dance.

"Wow look at this stage! Zoey isn't it pretty?! Our dreams are coming true!" She would've looked at the place amazed, it was her dream to perform here.

"Wow look at these mics!" She would've loved a black-coloured mic.

"You look soo pretty!" She would have complimented me in my outfits.

*End*

I latched onto Caro and gripped her right as if I was also afraid I was gonna lose her too.

"Her time of death was 12:34 am, December 23." At the end of the sentence, her voice cracked. She was holding back her tears.

"Tita, I'm soo, s-so sorry for y-your loss. I wish I was there to see her. I wish I could've p-prevented everything!"

"No, no, you didn't do anything. It wasn't your f-fault. It's just that they were at the wrong place at the w-wrong time." She started crying again. "Maybe it was just her time, who knows how much time she had left." I stayed silent and just kept crying. "My dear, remember this. You didn't do anything, it's not your fault so don't blame yourself. And just know, we are always here for you. Okay?"

"O-okay."

"Okay, now I have to go. Take care, and stay strong my love!"

"Okay bye, y-you guys too!" I ended the call and I hugged Caro tight.

We stayed silent for a bit, as I cried on her shoulder. She grabbed my face so I could look at her. "You have to tell the members."

Ohh right, I forgot about that part. "N-o we can't tell them yet. I don't want to ruin their night."

She makes me sit properly and she looks at me. "You have to, it's better for then to know now than later. I don't think they'd wanna perform not knowing that she's gone."

I stayed silent and I looked down at the ground. My tears have stopped falling, mostly because there weren't any left. "I guess I should then. But what do I say?"

She shrugged. "I don't know... I've never done this either. But let's just go they might come looking for us. And also we need to fix your makeup."

"Okay." I got up and so did Caro. I have all of my stuff in hand.

She grabbed my hand and looked at me before she opened the door back inside. We walked to the waiting room and we opened the door. Immediately the members looked at us concerned.

"What's wrong? Why is your makeup all messed up?" Ella said, rushing over to us.

"Guys we have something to tell you," I say.

"What?" They all say in unison.

"Take a seat first," Caro says.

I look at Caro and she gives me a small reassuring smile. I nod before looking back at my members. They looked concerned, confused, and scared. "G-guys, Vee's gone-" my voice cracks again and a sob escapes my lips.

The members start screaming and they too started crying. "No, your joking right!?" Ella said.

I shook my head as more tears fell. They were equally as shocked and sad as I am.

"No! No! It's a prank right, your hiding right?!" Ella came up to me and grabbed my hands, waiting for me to say that it was a joke.

I shook my head, and I started crying. The members went into chaos, they were equally as shocked and sad as j was. We all gathered into a hug as we cried all of our tears out.

They were also close to Vee, we all were. Bee had the personality that you just couldn't hate, she made everyone love her.

*Flashback*

"Hi, my name is Vivian. It's nice to meet you all! I hope I gave a good time with you all!" She said as she brightly smiled at the class she was teaching.

Everyone smiled and greeted her back. It was her first time teaching a class, and she was super nervous. I was there for moral support and to help her teach.

"Okay everyone, she will be teaching today's class. And I'm here to help, so come on let's get started!" I clasped my hands together and I walked to the corner of the room.

I have a chair ready and a small table, I will be testing her today since I have to see if she's fit to teach.

She started off by showing the students the first half of the dance, then she went into detail explaining the dance. She was always good at teaching, she had a thing for teaching children. She loved seeing the little smiles of the children that she taught. If she can teach children then she can also teach adults and teens.

At the end of the practice, the students were practically in love with her. Who wouldn't love her bubbly and cute personality. Which is odd since she looks super intimidating.

*End of flashback*

The door opens and a producer walks in. "You guys need to get ready your on in 20- wait what's going on?" I looked at the producer shocked at her arrival. I walk up to her and I explain the situation. "Ohh I'm so sorry for your loss... Uhmm do you guys want to leave early now? We can just stop it here for you guys."

I look back at my members. They didn't know what to say, all too shocked and sad.

"We'll perform, it's the last one anyway," I say.

"Alright... Again I'm so sorry for your loss." She backs out of the room looking sympathetic. That was awkward.

I give her a small nod before returning to my members. "Well we need to stay strong for a bit longer and we need to get out there. For Vivian!"

"For Vivian!" They all shout. And we rush to go get fixed up.

*****

I fixed up my makeup and changed my clothes. I trying not to cry so that I don't have to do my makeup again.

I put in my IEMs and I am looking at the members who are huddled into a circle. "On the count of three."

Everyone gathered their hand on the top of mine, we leave an open place for Vee. "1, 2, 3, ND!" We all scream and then we hurry off to our stages.

Our last stage was the closing stage. We decided to sing 'The Light' by The Ark which is ironic since it's a song dedicated to the victims of the "Saewol Fairy Accident", and now we are singing it for Vee. We are also singing 'A Poem Called You" by Taeyeon. I had asked the producers if they could edit our video to say "Dedicated to our late member" I wanted 'The Light' to be dedicated to Vee.

The producers did it for us. I heard the video play as I got onto the lift. I'm trying not to cry. We lift onto the stage and we start singing.

As I'm singing I'm looking around at my members, imagining what it would be like if Vee was here right now. She would be singing her heart out and dancing like she's a ray of light. As I am singing a tear rolls down my cheek and I try to hide it. I look around at the crowd of people in front of me, it was a blur since tears filled my eyes.

The performance went by too quickly, mostly since my mind was somewhere else. I walk off the stage really tired since I danced my heart out. This performance was for Vee so of course, I did my very best.

I walk into the waiting room and I lean against the desk. Taking a deep breath. Caro came up beside me and patted my back. I gave her a tight weak smile.

"Here your gonna need these." Caro hands me a bottle of some eye drops.

"What's this for?" I looked at the bottle confused.

"It's so your eyes don't puff up too much."

"Ohh okay, I'll take them later." I give it to Caro and she puts it into her pocket.

"Come on, we have to go sit in the artist zone." She drags me up into the arena.

We go back to where the boys were, and they still have our spots empty. I sat back down beside Jungkook, I have his jacket in hand which I didn't need anymore since I was wearing pants now. "Jungkook, here's your jacket." He looks at me and takes his jacket.

"You don't need it?" He looks at me concerned.

I shake my head and give him a soft smile. He nods his head and he puts it back on.

I focus my attention on the hosts, they were now announcing the start of the awarding portion. I'm not really paying attention to what they were saying.

After a bit of listening, not really, I ask Caro for the eye drops since my eyes started getting puffy.

"Do you need help putting it in?" She says as she opened it up for me.

"No, I think I can do it."

"Okay." She hands it to me and I drop a bit into both eyes. Blinking it only a little. "Here." I give it to her as I keep my eyes closed.

Jungkook's POV:

I'm sitting in the artist zone watching the performance when out of the corner of my eye I see someone walking towards me. I didn't look at first, thinking it was some other artist walking back to their seat. But then they started nearing us. I look and I realize it's Zoey.

She looked amazing! She had on her outfit from the Aespa performance and she looked really pretty. She was walking over and I am assuming she's going to sit here so I move over a bit, the boys follow my lead and move over a bit as well.

I greet her and Caro, with a bright smile. I notice that she doesn't have a blanket or a pillow to use, how dare the staff not give them one. I take off my jacket instead and give it to her. She looks at me kindly as I put it on her lap. She has such a nice smile. I look back to the stage trying not to steal too many glances at her.

We were watching the performance of Red Velvet when I noticed that Zoey was looking at her phone. I try not to look and invade her privacy so I just keep looking at the stage. I notice out of the corner of my eye that Caro and Zoey hug each other. I'm not sure why, but I also don't want to look since I might catch the attention of the media. So I keep my eyes on the stage.

The two girls suddenly get up and leave, but it looked like Caro was dragging Zoey out. I wonder where they went.

*****

It's now NDs last performance and I'm looking forward to it. I'm watching the video playing on the big screen when at the end it says "Dedicated to our late member", did they have a member that left? I didn't hear anything about it before. But I just think nothing of it.

I watch as they appear on the stage and they start singing. They were amazing like always, but this time something felt... different. It was as if it was lacking some happiness. I wasn't sure why, maybe they were just tired.

I watch them perform but closer to the end of the first song, I notice Zoey on the big screen, but it seems as if she's crying? Why would she be crying? What is going on?

*****

It is now the start of the awarding ceremony. Caro and Zoey are now back in the artist zone. They walked back here looking sad, it almost radiated off of them. Of course, I stay silent, mostly since I don't know what's going on and also so that I don't catch the attention of the media.

I watch the MCs trying to pay attention, but my mind keeps wandering back to Zoey. I want to know what was going on.

Zoey's POV:

The artists are getting called up to the stage if they won an award. And to my surprise, BTS has won quite a few. I'm too sad to even process what they've won. I just got up and bowed to them once they passed us. I'm really not in the mood to be standing here. I just wanna be at home crying in my bed.

*Flashback"

"Hey, Zoey! I got accepted into my dream college!" My best friend yelled onto her phone.

"Won't, calm down! Ahh, I can't hear out of my eats now." I rub my ear, trying to relieve the pain.

"Oops sorry, but I got accepted! Ahh, I'm so happy!" She was super excited.

"I'm so proud of you! They made a good choice of accepting you."

"Of course they did, who wouldn't want me?" She said with a little sas. I just snort.

"But, are you sure you really don't want to go to college?" Here she goes again.

"Like I've said a million times, no I won't be going to college. I already am making money and I am financially stable. College is going to make it harder to manage my time."

"Okay, whatever. But you could always change your mind. It's not too late."

I groan. "You sound like Caro."

"Hey, I was just saying the truth. Anyway, it would've been nice to have you as my dormate."

"Yeah I guess, but college just isn't for me. In case you forgot, I hate school."

"I know, I know. But college would be a lot funner with you here."

"That's not gonna work on me."

"Ugh, whatever. We'll be a little further from each other now. About 40 mins instead of 10."

"That's a lot, but I can wait 4 years. It's not that much anyway. Plus we can see each other like 2 times a week if we wanted to."

"Yeah, I guess. But when we get older, let's keep our promise."

"You betcha in keeping that promise."

*End of flashback*

I was sitting there when I suddenly feel Caro start shaking me. "Huh? What's going on?" I look at her startled?

"We got an award!" She gets up and she grabs my hand.

A cameraman gets our reaction and we walk down to the stage. The members show up a little later than we do. They look a little bit more enthusiastic than earlier. I take the trophy from the MCs, thanking them in the process. I admire the pretty trophy in my hands.

We stand in a row and we introduce ourselves. "Hello, we are ND Dance Crew."

I step forward and I stand in front of the mic. I look at all the people in front of me, thousands of people cheering for us. I take a deep breath before talking.

"Hello everyone, I am Zoey Marie Dolores. A member of ND dance crew. First of all, I want to say thank Golden Music for giving us this amazing opportunity to perform here tonight!" A big round of applause follows after I pause. "And I would also like to say a big thank you to our amazing fans! We wouldn't be here without your guys!" More applause. "I would also like to thank family members and my friends for supporting us!" More clapping. "And lastly, I wanna thank my members! Without you guys, we wouldn't even be dancing in the first place!" I look back at my fellow members and I give them a soft smile.

I stay silent for a bit, I look at the staff standing off stage. Earlier they told me if I wanted to announce our loss here on stage. At first, I was against it since I wasn't ready to do that yet, but my members thought it would be a good idea. We ended up having a long talk before I had no choice but to agree. We just think that Vee would love it and she would be happy.

I start my speech again. "I also have something to announce... For those who have been following us for more than a year, you know that we are a 24 member group. 23 right now since we are missing 1 member." I start to tear up. "I am so sad to announce that we are now permanently 23 members due to the loss of our former member Vivian Joy Cortez." A small sob escapes and I turn around to gather myself before continuing.

"She had died after being in a coma for a little over a year. Died at 12:34 am, December 23." I cry a bit more but I have to hold it on a little longer for Vee. "She fought long and hard, but she decided that she had to go after seeing us perform here today... I am sad to announce that Vivian Joy Rodrigo Cortez is now officially signing off." I am now crying even more.

I turn around once again to gather myself. I look back to the camera. "I would like to say a little something to Vee. Vee of your watching this right now, hi. Look we made it, we got to perform at your dream stage. Do you see all the people?" I look around at everyone. "Look we even got a trophy, this is for you. We couldn't have gotten here without you." I take a deep breath. "Vee, just know that we love you! And we will always be right here for you! You will always be a part of ND no matter what!" I try my best to smile a bit. "We love you! We really really love you! And we will miss you!" And that's it, I'm full-on crying now.

Caro comes and finishes our speech as the members hug me. I really don't know what to feel right now.

~~~~~

Authors note:

That's all for this chapter and yes I did cry as I was writing this. Im just gonna leave it at that.

Bye!