I need to stop forgetting the reason why I don't go to bed until midnight. It has been an issue for years. I feel dead right now. Although, perhaps, I should some more context to my current situation. 

I have been job searching since mid-January. I had to quickly stop as my parents had COVID and I quarantined myself as well. Once they recovered, they went on a business trip. I was dealing with a lot for the next two months (lingering grief from three deaths in one month), so I decided to take time and sort out my life (I mostly wanted to write, but that didn't happen). I didn't do as well of a job as I wanted to. But, then, there wasn't any job openings of what I wanted and I was still deciding what to do about school. 

Fast forward to April when Grey was neutered. He was a big baby so I wanted to keep an extra eye on him. At that time, I made a decision to drop out of the vet tech program as that program wasn't for me. Next, I took a few months to figure out what I was going to do now. 

Meanwhile, every job that caught my eye, I wasn't qualified enough. It sucks, but I continued on. 

Finally at the end of July, I finally got a phone interview after I had filled out an application a week and a half before. I did good as I was told I was going to get an email at the end of the week for working interview information. I was never sent an email. A week later, I sent an email to the vet clinic and didn't hear anything back. I was told to use that email for communication. (And they still have the job listing posted too...)

That's when I had to stop my job search again as my mom had her knee surgery. I was the one driving her and taking care of her. I applied to a few more places with no response. By that time, my brother's wedding was fast approaching and my anxiety self couldn't deal with the wedding and my horrible job search. So, I focused on the wedding. 

The wedding was over with. 

I went back to job search. Was getting discouraged. There was nothing. I was on the verge of looking at other places than vet clinics or anything to do with animals. 

And then, I found a great place that seemed like a good fit!

A week later, I got an email saying my application was rejected. 

I took a few days. I was at the end of my rope. 

My dad was getting on my case about not having a job yet, so I looked through my options again. 

Well, wouldn't you know that there were two new job listings that weren't there the day before. 

Of. Course. 

I wanted to apply to both, but I didn't meet the requirements for one of them. 

I sent in an application on Thursday. It was reviewed six hours later. The listing had an assessment attached to it. It was titled phone interview. Basically, there were three questions and I had to record myself saying my answers. It told me it would take about 6 minutes, it ended up being almost a half hour. 

I completed the phone interview on Friday afternoon. Two hours later, I get a call about scheduling an ACTUAL interview. An in person interview. That hasn't happened yet in all of these months of job searching. 

We scheduled the interview for Monday afternoon. 

Well, I was all prepared and ready to get some sleep to be well-rested for the day of the interview. 

This is where my first paragraph comes in at. Last night, I took three melatonin and fell asleep around 9:50 PM. 

I KID YOU NOT, I woke up at 3 AM thinking "it's 3 AM, isn't it?" I laid in bed for a few minutes trying to go back to sleep. It didn't work. I checked my phone to see, yes, I was right. 

I took two more melatonin and tried to go back to sleep.

I have been awake since. It is currently midnight on Tuesday. 3 more hours and I would be awake for 12 hours with only 5 hours of sleep. 

As for the rest of my Monday. I tried to not fall asleep in the afternoon. It was raining all day. My tires needed to be pumped up with more air and I found out my tire pump doesn't work. My dad helped me with his pump. But now, we might have to replace my tires as air is leaking out of three of them. 

I drove 45 minutes to the vet clinic that has wanted me enough to bring me in for an interview. It's a full-time receptionist position so I don't mind the long drive. 

20 minute interview happened with the veterinarian where I was told that, yes, I can go from receptionist to veterinary assistant to a vet tech and go to school if I wanted to. Also, that I wasn't the only applicate for the job. 

That's fine. Although, there is something that I would have to do for the job and that my parents did, but I'm not going to get into that. My brain is already muddled enough. 

I'm surprised I survive the interview and the drive while like this. 

So, we shall see how this job goes. 

I do want to work on writing, but I'm barely holding on as it is writing this. I think I'll wait until tomorrow. For now, I'm going to go get ready for bed, watch a TV show to settle down, and hope that I fall asleep in the next few hours. 

If not, then you won't be hearing from me as I will be mentally dead. 

Also, how is it that I can be around flu positive people and not get it, but the moment I feel extremely anxious I'm either throwing up or about to. 

I even got really dizzy earlier, which could have been the sleep deprivation. 

And my sister got really sick last week and ended up getting two COVID tests. They turned out to be negative, but that cold (because it was a cold) was terrible. She's still recovering. 

So, yeah. That has been my wonderful experience in my life at the moment. 

I hate applying for jobs because they ask for way too much experience for some basic entry jobs. I'm still upset that the one place I was hoping for rejected my application. Like, I was OVERqualified for the position but willing to take the low pay. 

Well, I guess this is bye for now. 

Until next time, 

Later!

~MsPenguingirl1234.

Published: October 26, 2021.