We got stuck in a cave. Specifically; me and Airachnid. I landed on Airachnid’s chest face first.Don’t cry Ivy, I tell myself, That’s a sign of weakness.Build yourself up and you get your walls strong; that’s when someone becomes a strong individual. That’s when they keep all those feelings inside. You don’t wanna show you are weak; you are strong!

I was slapped off and then hit the wall across.

“Owch.” I whine.

“Time to slice off your head.” Airachnid said, with a hiss in her voice.

Randomly,I hit her servo and boy it hurt!

“Ow.” I yelp, waving my right hand.  “Ow!” I duck hearing a swish over my head. “My dear hand!”

“Stop moving, little pest.” Airachnid said, with a sneer in her voice.

I brush against my shirt and feel a soft flat sticking out object from my shirt.

“Tag!” I scream.

I heard a loud thud.

“Scream one more time—“ Airachnid begins threatening  me.

“I FORGOT TO REMOVE THIS SHIRTS TAG!” I took of the shirt and started kicking at it. “Ew! Ew! Ew! I hate tags!”

Then my foot hit the ground instead of the shirt, next second that foot hurt,  and I hopped up and down. Dear primus it really does hurt! A large metal surface hit me at the head. Ow that hurts my forehead. I fell on the shirt—on my back—with a thump sound. Perhaps being eyeless, two fingerless, and IDSless things can get much worse. But no, the IDS missed the tag. Doesn’t everyone hate it when they miss a tag that brushes against their skin and bugs them? I hate tags like people on the internet copying my stories intentionally.

“Put the shirt on.” Airachnid said.

I get up while saying, “Then cut off this tag!”

“No.” Airachnid said. “I won’t do something for a puny human.”

“After all, I’m only human.” I mused,picking up the shirt.  ‘And I can infect you with herbies! Ring a bell.”

“Put it on.” Airachnid demands.

“Why?” I ask, feeling mishevious.

“Because you are not wearing a .  .  .Garment for the chest parts.” Airachnid said. “And I do not want to see the product that feels your young.”

I laugh hysterically, and then slam my fists on the floor.

“Hah!” I laugh. “You view them for feeding, and not for the attractive parts. Hah!”

“Put it on!” Airachnid orders me.

“Or what?” I ask, rubbing my hands together.  “Yer gonna  slice me into a million pieces? Pheesah; you can’t kill me.” I take off my glasses and then open my eye-lids, very boldly. “Take a good look at my eye sockets!”

Airachnid screams, stumbling back.

“Put them off!”

“Did you just do a brainfart.” I ask. “I don’t wear Bra’s when it comes to being comfortable, well, unless I’m goin’ somewhere that’s far off; like a different state, a store, and so on.” I heard her legs rattle. “Cut off the tag,” I hopped onto her legs holding the shirt.  “Or else I’ll rub my chest on your face; big blunder spider,yes you are, who’s the Arachnia? Yes you are! Cut off the tags, please, Blackarachnia.”

“My name is Airachnia!”

“Blackarachnia, Blacharachnia, Airachnid.” I list.  “You got lots of names; such as itzy bitzysspider walked up the water trout, down came the rain, and out came the spider. Itzy Bitzy Spider walked up the water trout, down came the rain,and she went into the pig feed!”

“Fine!” Airachnid snaps,grabbing the shirt from me. “I’ll do it. But where’s this ‘tag’ you speak of?”

“Itzy bitzy spider went up the cotton shirt, down came the rain, and out came a dead spider.” I continue singing. “And then the itzy bitzy spider put the cotton shirt inside out and down came the flippy white piece of stuff hangin’ from the siiiidee!” I sing. “Itzy bitzy spider fell down the water drain.”

I’m enjoying this way too much.

Snip snip.

“Put it on.” Airachnid said, after I heard her snap something off.

“Is the cut off part white?” I ask.

“Yes.” Airachnid said.

“Hold it up, Arachnia.” I said. “Cause Itzy bitzy spider .  . .”

“Here!” Airachnid said,as her arm brushed against the floor. “Feel it.”

I felt it. That certainly was the tag.

“Good.” I said.  “We’re on a truce treaty, for now.”

“Then die!” Airachnid took something out and clicked a  button.

WHIiizzzz.

I cough.

“Nice.” I said. “What was it?”

“No!” Airachnid screams.

“Yes!” I yell.

“Die already!” Airachnid hit me with her arm.

And I bounced off the wall then hit her square at the face then slid down. Oh primus I did rub my chest over her face. Airachid slapped me off her face making these sounds that were ‘I’m disgusted!’ indicators. I landed on the floor. At least I landed on my shirt; that’s a bright side. Emergency is no longer on the table. I put on the shirt.

“Why do you remind me of Maleficent; description wise?” I ask.

“Because, you are dead.” Airachnid growls.“Earth is terrible—“ Airachnid begins to whine about this planet that never gets destroyed in the Transformers franchise like ever.  “Why are you not dead.”

 I roll an eye.

“Earth bites you in the rear,” I said, with a grimace. “Since you are a Cybertronian Organic; I suggest you go see Knock Out for some rabies shots.”

Airachnid made a chilling sigh. I could hear her clawed back legs sink into the floor.

“Megatron will make me the second in command, after this.” Airachnid said, in a calm and creepy voice.

“Hah!” I laugh at her. “Starscream is the best second in command.”

“I can do better.” Airachnid said with a hiss, as she drew near to me. “By chopping off your head.”

That threat is somewhat getting old.

“Um.” I tap my fingers together. “Didn’t you try that a few minutes ago?”

“I got an axe.” Airachnid said.  “And Soundwave will see his mistake; dead.”

I am cornered. Cornered! And she has the nerve to scare me.

“You’ll be dead in a Vorn.” I said, keeping my cool. “I am not his mistake.”

“You are his mistake.” Airachnid interjects. 

“I am not his scrapping piece of a damn tailbite child!” I yell out at her in a deep, and very angered voice. “If you want to be smart then start by referring to me as ‘Not Soundwave’s mistake’ and not by his mistake. You have ZERO intelligence referring to me as his mistake. Do you know how stupid that makes ya? You are not replacing the red queen from Alice in Wonderland. I’ve been wondering why you’ve got fascination with heads. Are you the 13th warrior robot version from the 13th warrior movie? Are you?”

Silence.

“You are!” I squeal. “I’m a big fan! I  LOVED the scene where you, itzy bitsy spider, get squashed by one of those cave Dwellers. Know what I am talking about; Itzy Bitsy spider?”I heard a large thud. “Blackarracchhniiaa.” I call out. “Blackaraaachniiaaa; where are youuuu?”

I walk forwards waving my hands; blind as a bat. I didn’t have my IDS on me. It’s with Arcee. As you know  .  .  . There’s a large sound coming from the other direction like a gigantic body is being dragged.The walls turned out to be my guide following Airachnid’s body being dragged across the ground. Eventually the dragging came to a halt. Who had dragged her?

“Um.  .  .” I felt around the floor. “Dairy-ach-nid, come ouutt.”

I crawled around, feeling an empty space on the floor and went forwards. I went forwards for a while. Seconds turned into minutes and minutes turned into what could be defined as hours. It has been thirty-three minutes. That was until My forehead hit something hard. One guess: Airachnid.

“Ow!” I yelp. “Me is okay.”

“Get off me!” Airachnid finally snapped, and then I heard a metal smack on against the rugged dirty ceiling.

I giggled at the sound of Airachnid’s helmet striking the ceiling.

“Die!” Airachnid yells as the ground rumble beneath us

Nothing happens to me. Not even death. For a Decepticon such as Airachnid she apparently hasn’t learned the previous lesson from last time. Her armor must be fixed up from her latest scheme that must have been Team Mech and her working together to defeat the kids. I can hear water drop from above which lands on Airachnid’s helmet that creates a trickle trip tipple sound.

“Why don’t you die?” Airachnid said in a low voice.

“Ask Megatron.” I said. “And he’ll tell you.”

“He told me you are a parasite who does nothing!” Airachnid yells.

“I am.” I said.  “Logically.”

“Did you knock me out a few earth minutes ago?” Airachnid asks.

“Reach your hand out, please.” I order her.

I heard the whirrs from Airachnid’s joint; then I smacked her face with it.

“You big lousy idiot is perfect for Soundwave!” I shriek, as the smacking went on. “You should shower with him. You idiot!” Idiot is my new favorite word.  “If Knock Out’s been showering with you; then you are an idiot! You large overgrown spider-- that needs to be decimated--is an idiot!”

“Stop it!” Airachnid cries.

“Say uncle!” I offer.

“No.” Airachnid refuses.

Smack.

“You are an idiot!” I continue. “Filthy scum of an idiot. You are an idiot! I can’t knock out .  .  . Knock Out of course. Nor can I do a knock out on you. Because I’m a girl you know; nor an automobile euthueiestt mech. But that’s beside the point. Say; you love Knock Out!”

Smack.

“I love Knock Out!” Airachnid yells.

I drop her servo.

“Perfecto.” I slid down her thigh. “Now tell me again. Who’s your daddy?”

“Unicron?” Airachnid said it like a question.

“He’s your daddy?” I said, and then shrug. “Makes sense why you were dropped as a sparkling.”

“No!” Airachnid said. “He’s not my father.”

“Then who is.” I ask, quite leery.

“No one.” Airachnid sid.

“Impossible.” I said.  “You must be the child of Megatron and Starscream!” I ran around her feeling such adrenaline and excitement in my body. “How’s your daddy? Is your daddy not unicron? Is he a great father that he gives you unicorns?”

There is silence, again.

“I-i-i-I am not their child.” Airachnid said.

“Ah ha!” I point at her. “You are unicron’s child!”

“No!” Airachnid said.

“If you are not, stop having such long periods of silence!” I yell at her. “I’m blind,” I put on my glasses. “After all.”