Janus was going insane.

Why? Because he was conflicted. He laid in his crib, no longer regressed, staring a the ceiling. They had left the lid off. They had trusted him enough to keep the lid off. It was the first night they had left it off, sure there are security cameras pretty much everywhere in the building, but still.

It bugged him.

He knew he could climb out silently and try and find some decent clothes and try to escape. He could.

But.

The longer he lay there, the longer he debated whether or not he truly wanted to leave. He enjoyed their company, he enjoyed their hugs and kisses, how playful they can be, their cooking, the feeling of being loved.

Love.

"Alright kiddo, you all tucked in and cozy?" Patton had said as it came time for bed. Janus had insisted he was far too big for bedtime, but Patton's word was final, and Janus was kinda sleepy from his nightly bottle of warm milk. And he is very cozy and warm, with a full-body onesie and a soft blankie that he was swaddled in. His body felt all heavy, as if the blanket weighed far than it did. Even with how heavy he felt, it wasn't a feeling of painful heaviness but rather a comforting pressure.

"Uh-huh," He murmurs, voice quiet and tired. Patton smiled softly as leaned into the crib, pressing a little kiss to his head, which had Janus going pink in the face.

"Good night then kiddo! I love you," He says without thinking, pausing after. He didn't hear a word—not even a sound from the man, so he figured he hadn't heard, too tired from the day, and merely left.

But Janus had heard. He had merely froze.

Patton couldn't love him. He is a frightening villain who would kill them at the first opportunity.

Wouldn't he?

Janus was conflicted, he sat up in his crib, gripping at his hair. He was so confused he wanted to scream. He tugged, gritting his teeth. Why did they have to be so kind?!

Instead of screaming, he stared at the bars on his crib and began to lift himself, cursing the little booties on his feet silently, his cheeks reddening. When he wasn't regressed, his childish clothing held far more embarrassment than when he was little. As he tried climbing up his bared prison, the booties proved to make his life difficult, but he managed, and eventually, he tumbled onto the ground and looked around.

He could leave now, right?

Janus frowned and shook his head. It was too easy...

And why would he want to?

His "friends" never treated him so sweetly like these heroes have. They've never said they love him...

"Lust," Janus murmurs, staring at the ceiling mindlessly while the other sucked on his third cigarette in a row, wearing nothing but a bubblegum pink robe. Janus wore less, too exhausted to bother covering himself. He didn't bother to glance at the man he was speaking to, his body painfully numb. He thought seeking out pleasure on how own would fulfill the emptiness and lack of control over his body. Somehow, he felt even more numb.

"Yeah?" The man asks, peering over, tossing his cigarette into the ashtray, twisting his head.

"Do you love me?"

Lust blinked at the question, and then he began to laugh.

He laughed.

"Love you? Darling no!" He cackles, moving his manicured hand to his mouth, covering it as he continued letting out amused giggles. "You're funny, you think we love you? Damn, you're a good friend and all Janus but we don't love anyone. Loving people gets ya hurt sweetheart. If ya fucking me cause you're looking for love then you're fucking the wrong person dear."

Janus didn't know if he felt anguish or relief.

Yeah, they didn't love him.

Janus made up his mind at that memory, and toddled over to the door, slowly opening it. He tip-toed down the hall and soon, he was in front of Patton's door. He peeked in and shuffled over. He didn't know why he had walked in there, but he stared at Patton's snoozing form and shifted from foot to foot.

He didn't know what he wanted. He had felt drawn to his room as if entranced. He felt safe with Patton, Janus was sure he merely wanted reassurance that he's safe. However, he felt silly, what was he to do? Wake the man?

Shaking his head, Janus turned to leave, deciding his midnight visit was a joke, only to hear a soft, exhausted voice. "Jan, baby, come lay down, it's late."

Janus froze at that, but melted at such a sweet tone and felt his knees clank together, legs ready to give out. He turned and Patton scooted over, patting the side next to him and Janus gladly lowered himself next to him, burying his face into his neck, ears burning. He was pathetically under their thumb, wasn't he? He mindlessly listened to them now—but he listened with glee. It wasn't like the others, these heroes didn't command him around and treat him like some dog. Patton, Logan, maybe even Virgil—they care for him.

How? Janus wasn't sure.

"Didn't mean to wake you," He feels himself mumbling, earning a chuckle.

"Janny, you're good, let's just try and get some sleep in yeah? I'd hate to have a cranky little snake on our hands in the morning hm? You gonna be a cwanky wanky lil snakey?" Patton cooed teasingly, gently slipping a finger under his chin, tickling him, earning a soft squeak and then a whine, burying his face further down into his chest to escape the ticklish sensation.

"Paaaaat..." He complained, earning a giggle.

"Okay, okay," Patton surrenders, petting his hair. "Good night Janny."

"Night."

Yeah, Janus liked it here, he enjoyed the little butterflies he got at their teasing and sweet remarks.

Maybe...

Just Maybe...

He even loved them too.

---

Janus was up before Patton, he had carefully climbed out of his hold and out towards the kitchen, his stomach growing as he sneaked into the pantry. He stared at the variety of cereals and decided on Honey Nut Cheerios. He's a big boy, he can make his own bowl of cereal!

Grabbing at the box, he brought it down and searched for a bowl. He grinned as he found a plastic one with cute flowers decorated on it along with a matching spoon. He grabbed the milk from the fridge and began quietly opening up the cereal. He tried to carefully pour it in, unfortunately, it came toppling all out at once. Janus squeaked as Cereal filled the bowl to the top and overflowed, making a big mess on the counter. He tipped the box upright and pouted at the mess.

"Oops..." He murmurs, his cheeks pink. That wasn't what was supposed to happen. He decided to just keep going and began pouring the milk.

It made it into the owl.

And the counter.

And the floor.

"Oh shit," Janus murmurs, freezing. Was he gonna get in trouble? What if they didn't love him anymore? Janus could feel his eyes watering at the mere thought. People can take back their "I love yous" right? Was Patton gonna take it back?

Janus fiddled with his hands, staring at the mess, shaking his head. He got it! He could clean it up! Shoving his bowl of cereal to the side, he grabbed an ungodly amount of paper towels and began wiping up the milk and cereal, scooping up any cereal he could and tossing it out. He ended up making a bigger mess though as he lifted the dribbling paper towels and carried them across the kitchen. The milk leaked all over and Janus felt his frustration building. It wasn't working!

He angrily tossed the paper towels away and sniffled. This was too hard!

"Janus?"

Janus jumped as he came face to face with Logan, who seemed to have just woken up, his bedhead on clear display for the clumsy little, who looked ready to burst into a fit of tears. "What are you doing out of your crib?" He asks. His tone wasn't accusing, merely curious. He seemed to notice Janus' delicate expression and softened his gaze, patiently awaiting an answer.

Janus sniffled, fiddling with the hem of his shirt, wondering why he hadn't mentioned the mess yet. "I slept with Patty last night," He murmurs, his voice cracking at the end. Logan seemed to hear it, as his eyebrows crinkled together in concern. Much more awake now, the man finally noticed the mess Janus had made and chuckled softly.

Wait.

Chuckling?

Janus glanced up, his eyes previously having been glued to the floor, his bottom lip beginning to tremble. "W-Why ya laufin'?" He asks, fisting at his eyes, his voice sounded far more higher than he remembered it, and that fuzzy feeling was back.

Logan shakes his head. "Oh Janus, you made a bit of a mess hm?" He says, his voice light, seemingly more amused than anything.

Why wasn't he angry?

"Sorry...m'tried to clean it up," He insists, but Logan didn't seem to mind. He grabbed a wet rag from the sink and began working on the mess. Janus stared in awe as it was all cleaned up in less than a minute!

"How'd ya do dat? My towels weren't workin'!" He complains, watching as Logan dries up the ground and counter with a few paper towels before tossing them away. He grabbed himself a bowl and switched the Honey Nut Cheerios out for Frosted Wheat, and stole some of Janus' milk, as he had poured far too much.

Logan smirked at his explanation and began putting on a spot of coffee while he carried Janus' bowl towards the table. "Well Janus, I'm a bit bigger than you, so I know how to do a few more things, like properly clean up a mess. Next time you make a mess, just come get one of us, I swear we won't be upset. We could even show you how to clean it up," Logan explains, gently beginning to lift Janus into his highchair, ignoring his small whines and pink cheeks as he is strapped in. Logan sets the bowl on the tray and leaves him to eat while he waits for his coffee to finish brewing.

"Okay...m'still sorry for makin' a mess."

"I wouldn't expect any less from a little one like yourself," Logan assures him simply.

"Loo," He complains lightly, but the smell of coffee distracts him. "Mmh! That smells yummy, I wan' sum!" He says, perking up a little.

Logan seems to dither as he voiced his want for the caffeinated drink, mainly because he didn't want a toddler Janus hyped up on caffeine, and they didn't own decaf coffee. "My apologies Janus, Coffee is an adult beverage, how about orange juice instead?" He offers, earning a loud whine from the other.

"No no! Wan sum of your drink!" He insists, kicking his feet, earning himself a scornful look.

"Now, now, is that any way to act?" Logan reprimands, crossing his arms. "You can have milk or orange juice this morning and that's all. If you don't choose you'll have water."

Janus tossed himself back in his seat, crossing his arms, puffing out his cheeks in pure frustration.

He hated not getting what he wants. That was the downside with these heroes, they were always telling him what to do!

Not that the others didn't do that...and the heroes did it because they want what's best for him...

But he still wanted the yummy smelling drink! Janus swore he knew the name of, but apparently not at the moment.

Deciding he didn't want plain water, he reluctantly mumbled out a grumpy "Oran' juice," before taking a pouty bite of his cereal.

Logan nods, deciding not to comment on his attitude, for now, giving him time to stew. If it continued, however, they would be having a long lecture about it on the naughty step. Grabbing Janus a sippy, he gets him his orange juice and joins him at the table for breakfast.

Janus was awfully quiet during breakfast, Logan assumed he was still pouting, but truthfully Janus had begun to feel guilty for being a bit of a butt towards Logan, especially as he had just cleaned up his mess for him!

What if Patton found out and took back his "I love you"?

Sinking into his seat, Janus lightly pushed his cereal away, his appetite disappearing, and his stomach-turning.

"Janus," Logan softly says, though Janus didn't look up, merely twiddling his sippy cup in his hands. "I am not upset with you, you know this yes?"

Janus nibbled at his lip. "Sorry—"

"It's alright, it's quite normal for little ones to have tantrums," Logan quickly interrupts, and Janus merely nods. Sighing, Logan stands and gathers his empty bowl. "Is there something else troubling you?"

Janus is quick to shake his head, but the action left a horrid taste on his tongue. It seemed the lie was so strong that he didn't even have to say it for the taste to strike him.

"Come now, I feel that isn't the truth, you can speak to us about anything that is troubling you," Logan assures, beginning to rinse his bowl, setting it in the dishwasher after. "If you don't talk with me, at least speak with one of the others."

Janus shifted.

And then sniffled.

"Jus'," He finds himself lisping, fisting at his eyes. "Don' wan Pat to take it back," He whispers, earning a reasonable look of confusion.

"Take what back?"

"His I love you," He murmurs, heat rising to his cheeks, and suddenly Logan understood.

Was he great with feelings? No. Absolutely horrid, but Patton had taught him a thing or two.

"Janus," Logan says, taking a seat next to him. Janus felt a little silly having such an intense talk while strapped into an oversized highchair, but Logan didn't seem to mind. "You can't take back an 'I love you' either you love a person or you don't. If Patton says he loves you, then I guarantee he does."

"What if I'm bad?" Janus murmurs. "What if he no loves me anymore cause I mess up—"

"Janus, there are times you'll make mistakes," Logan explains, deciding to cut off his series of 'What ifs' as those would merely have him spiraling. "But I don't think there's much you can do to get Patton to stop loving you, Janus."

Janus sniffled, feeling a bit better even if it was hard to believe that Patton just loved him...just like that.

"Kay."

"My apologies if my explanation was lacking, I'm not the best with feelings. I believe you and Patton should have a conversation on this when he awakes."

Janus nods and Logan reaches over, grabbing ahold of Janus' spoon, lifting a spoonful of his Cheerios. Janus blushes, trying to grab his spoon only to have his hand shooed away.

"You're far too little, or you would have done it yourself by now," Logan insists, his tone only slightly teasing, which had Janus growing far more flustered. Reluctantly, he leaned forward and took the spoon in his mouth. He had stopped fighting their acts of feeding him ages ago, but it didn't make it any less embarrassing.

"After, how would you like to watch a bit of cartoons as we wait for everyone else to wake?"

Janus nodded eagerly at the suggestion, taking another spoonful of cheerios. Who could say no to Cartoons?!