PETER PARKER WAS A VERY INTERESTING BOY, I WAS BEGINNING TO REALISE.

He had been painted to be a villain, a dark and mysterious individual who would stick out like a sore thumb, with abilities unheard of that were malicious and only used to wreak havoc - but though I had only been around him for a few days, there were no signs of the reckless, broken monster I had been warned about. He was complex and peculiar, and he captured my eye easily, but he did not seem to be the same being that had been described. Almost likeable, really.

He was also incredibly good at covering any tracks of him being Spiderman - something I did not like at all. 

Peter Parker may not be the best at disguises or sneaking about, or lies or even wearing a good poker face - but he did know how to play his part as just Peter, not the Spider-man that leapt from building to building and soared through the sky. The thought of it being easy had never crossed my mind, but I did not think the act of admission would be such a complex step, out of all of them.

My days, as expected, soon began to revolve around my mission and the mission alone - I awoke before the sun, trained rigorously, went to school and did everything I could to learn more about the boy, then trudged back to Inga to begin research on any materials found. It was exhausting, simply put, but I enjoyed learning more about the strange character the boy was.

However, he was extremely good at making sure no one knew that it was him as Spider-man or seeing him ever about - every news photo was only of Spider-man, never of Peter himself, and always blurred images seconds after he moved to flee the scene. And while I was on watch all hours of the days and nights, I always found myself falling just the littlest bit too late, or falling into incidents that prevented the easiest solutions to the little issues. That, or I would catch the effects of it later on, into the late hours of the night or the day after where he would show up to school, very clearly wearing the results of a not-so-good sleep. American teens always seemed to need their eight hours, and, well, the Parker boy demonstrated what that loss meant very well.

On that Thursday afternoon, he looked weary and like he could barely keep his eyes open; no doubt from a late night mission that I had missed, something that Inga would have scolded me on profusely had she herself not had a reason for me to stay in. If only I could ask him questions, figure out more about the problem at hand, then life would be easier, but I could not let him know that I was anything more than a Canadian exchange student with an acute interest in science. Observing at a distance, snapping pictures or stealing bits of evidence when possible, that was the slow and sure route that Madame had suggested - the plan Inga hated, but what would have to work, then.

As I sat in the cafeteria, an open chemistry textbook and several blank papers carefully positioned over more important things, I could not help but wonder more about the Parker boy, as a character. Less so about his powers, the fact that he was a dangerous individual that had caught the Lider's eye - no, my thoughts drifted to his morality, the fact that he was presumed a hero by those who saw his actions or heard about them on the news. What sort of troublemaker, or a reckless weapon would risk their life for others? Who would wear a half-assed suit and jump around just to catch or defend a stranger? It was curious.

My musings would be interrupted, perhaps fortunately, quickly after they began, however.

"Hey there, Emily!" chirped a cheerful voice, and I turned to see Gwen followed by Mary Jane. "I almost missed you! What are you up to?"

I carefully shoved papers over any visible notes and shrugged towards my open science textbook. "Just finishing up homework, I guess."

"Mind if we join you?"

I did mind, very much so, but if I said anything they would be upset, which meant a bigger mess to clean up, so I forced a smile and shook my head. "Not at all. Sorry for the mess though."

Mary Jane rolled her eyes and plopped her metal tray on the lunch table, carefully moving a pile of papers to the right so she had more room. "It's fine, honestly. We're sitting with you, not analysing your work habits or anything."

"So," Gwen picked up, eyebrow raised as she swallowed a bite of some sort of sandwich, "science sort of girl? At least, from what I'm seeing of your notes and the classes you go to. I'm assuming you're into that stuff."

"Yes. I like science. It's...interesting to me."

"That's so neat; I wish I could be like that. I'm more of a centre-stage idiot, but that's cool." Mary Jane waved her script in clarification, her red-tinged locks bouncing from her actions. "D'ya have any specific interests in the field or just a general outlook? You seem to have a whole lot of classes, s'hard to narrow down you as a person from that look."

"Um..." I was distracted for a brief moment by a rustling of chairs; Peter was getting up, followed by his idiotic friend. They were going somewhere, though I wasn't sure where, and seemed rather excited about something. I mentally cursed at myself for not listening harder and picking up where exactly that would be. "Sorry, what was the question?"

However, the original question had been dropped; instead, Gwen's eyes glistened with sly eagerness. She twisted a shiny black lock of hair in her hand, watching me closely. "Wait, were you - were you looking at Peter?"

"Excuse me?"

"I saw that look, hon, don't deny it," she cooed, resting her chin upon her hand. "That was so much more than just a quick glance."

Her friend's smile grew, and she wagged a finger my way. Mary Jane was seldom to show a lot of excitement, I was gathering, but she certainly perked up after catching up to her friend's analysis. "You like him? Peter? D'ya actually?"

And see there, that was the issue. I had watched exactly seventeen high-school movies, gathered the plots and made key analyses on the characters and their actions to know what was happening. A common trope that fell upon people in both the films and real life happened to be crushing hard, creating a silly idea of artificial love in the young girl or guy's head simply from physical looks and small talk made once or twice in the halls. It was a key attraction at that age and in that environment, I had picked up on it quite a few times too, in the halls on the way to classes. Everyone seemed to be looking for love - stupidly, foolishly really - and I had just become the next supposed victim of lust that always played protagonists in those films.

I fought the urge to bite the limb she was threatening me with, instead covering up with a blank stare their way. "I barely know him."

"That's okay; Gwennie barely knows Flash Thompson, but that doesn't stop her from sighing and watching him with goo-goo eyes all the time, right Gwen?"

The girl in question rolled her eyes and ignored the playful jab. "I didn't think you'd be the type to like someone like him, but hey, science and science...do you share classes together then?"

"We share a few, yes."

Gwen squealed, "this is just getting better and better! This is adorable!"

"Gwen, stop teasing; she's turning red!" Mary Jane admonished, slapping her friend across the shoulder teasingly. "We don't want to make her feel bad about this shit. Be nice!"

In actually, I was turning red - not from embarrassment but from rage, as they were beginning to get on my nerves and pry into things they shouldn't be prying into. Though it was just an objection into lust, crushes that had not even begun to develop on people that were of interest for very different reasons, I did not appreciate their interest into Peter Parker and I. Sure, they meant nothing by it but it meant a whole lot to me. I could not afford a compromise for such silly reasons.

The table clattered as I stood up hurriedly, gathering up my belongings and shoving papers into my bag. "I have got to get to class."

"Can't you stay longer? We won't tease!"

Their pleas, followed by Gwen's soft apology and Mary Jane's disgruntled words of regret, fell upon closed ears.

I was already walking off, ignoring their coaxing words that were making me sound as if I was a dog being told to throw back a stick in their direction. They did not need to know more than that, and they did not need acknowledgement of anything even if it be little.

Instead of turning to my next class, however, I hurried down the hallways in search of the pair of boys that I had watched turn that same corner and head off. My best bet was either the library or the gym, and considering the physique and nature of the two, the former was my best option. I had seen the smallest and the largest dominate in physical situations, their height or size really meant nothing to that observation - no, it was rather in the way they walked or held their books or even stood that helped to decide where they could be hiding.

Also, it did help to know that neither really liked the gymnasium, at all.

My guess had proven right, for they were sitting with their books out and deep in a discussion. I watched them for a few seconds, staring intently at their lips to try and understand what they were saying, then realised that it would be much smarter to simply sit at a nearby table and listen to them that way.

Peter didn't start at the scraping of my chair against the ground, nor did he lose his place in his conversation. "...just saying, that's not even possible; Qui Jon is in no way a secret Sith Lord. Where would you even get that theory from?"

The boy across from him shrugged and showed him some sort of image on his phone, causing Peter to roll his eyes. "Look, there's a huge possibility that it's true! I mean, just look at the evidence!"

Evidence? I had no idea who they were talking about, or what this 'sith lord' was, but it sounded more than puzzling to me. The fact that the two were whispering in this large room was even more strange, for there was hardly anyone in there aside from a few stragglers and us three. I just needed to find a way to ask him about it, to get him to spill something about his alternate identity, without causing suspicion. Also, figure out just what or who this Qui Gon was.

However, my plans were shot down as the bell blared loudly and everyone began to gather their things to head off to class. Peter shrugged on his bag and smiled at his companion before heading to the door, "see you after school?"

"Sure thing, Peter!" Ned chorused, and he waved back before scurrying off to wherever else he chose to shadow. I didn't pay him much mind; he was not my target, nor of any interest to me. Wherever he liked to lurk was none of my concern or care.

I, too, began to pack up and made sure to take my time so that there was no suspicion when I showed up near the same time as Peter. Maybe today I could get further into a botched conversation - as long as I didn't end up messing that up, too, considering the way things had gone so far.

||

"How have you found nothing?!"

I flinched at the iron grip on my arm, fear-filled eyes frozen on hers. She was sucking the soul out of me, even in seconds and with every attempt to guard my thoughts and mind away from her searching gaze. The woman commanded respect and I had learnt to not fall on her bad side, knowing that any wrong move would cost something that meant too much to lose. "I-you know I have tried, you have seen the recordings and you know that I have tried, he is just - he is evasive, more of a hideaway than was anticipated, and he must be approached carefully."

My words and pleas really meant nothing. Was there even a point? The demon had reached her boiling point and she had no one else to fight against aside from me, as proved many times before. 

Inga was furious by the fact that I had once again come home with barely anything except for a fleeting interaction in English class. The second I had come home she had pounced, as if she was a cat waiting for her prey, and had ambushed me with questions and then threats, insults and jeers that got more severe, more dangerous as the seconds rolled away.

"You're a spy for a reason; are you really that idiotic that you can't observe this child?"

I gritted my teeth, still pulling away as hard as possible, and still to no avail. My feet were digging into the carpet, toes rolling to hold myself up and keep to the stone posture I had been taught. Madame never raised a failure, no matter who or what was in the way. "What more could you want from me? I am following all the steps I am required, doing all I can - it has been days, not much could have happened, you expect too much. What more do you want from me?"

"What more do I want?" Her voice grew dangerously quiet yet razor sharp, each word like a fresh cut against my mind. "I want you to do the job you were assigned to do. I want you to figure out a way to get to him so that we do not suffer from your idiocy. I want answers, now!"

I did not have answers or solutions, and I did not know just how to get them. She was playing an impossible game, asking me to somehow hand her the treasure after so little time had passed. She knew that it was impossible to have what she wanted already, and yet she demanded it, so that she could have the chance to abuse her power. And I hated it, and I hated her, more than I could say I hated most - for she had no reason to treat me as such, or no right, and certainly, there was no chance to escape or prove myself unworthy of her low blows.

She was expecting things that I could not give her and pulling more and more on the tight leash holding her to me when I came up empty.

What stung most was when she questioned my presence, however, her voice low and merely a whisper in my ear. Her nails still dug deep but what hurt most was the cold words that told me of my future failures, of the fall I would have and the fact that I would never be more than a fault that the Red Room had made in their decisions.

That, I could not take.

"I will prove to you that I am worthy of this mission," I hissed back, glaring at her and struggling not to cave under her unnerving eyes. "I will prove it to you. When I stop the Parker boy of whatever you think he's doing, and I become a Black Widow, I will laugh in your face because then I will have proven that you were wrong. You will eat your words because I will do this."

Inga laughed; shrill and bitter, echoing through the mostly-empty room. Had I not known the demon that was now controlling my life, I would have thought it was a lone wolf, howling at the moon and lusty for blood. Her tongue moved quickly, sharp whips of Russian curses and taunts that stung with each blow. "You are not, you will never be who you wish, you are a foolish girl, drunk off silly lies. You think you are special? You were not even the first choice, and certainly will not be the last, after you fall in the dust and cry bloody tears."

Second choice. Second best. All of my work at the Academy had been to prove that I was not another girl dancing in the background, that I was worth their praise, but I was the second best choice. Someone else was better than me at the Academy, someone who had failed.

It was not so hard to assume who.

Francesca; she was the first choice, it had to be her. She was the one that Madame watched closest, and always the one who was pushed the hardest in class. I had believed it to be a test for myself to watch her fall, her limp body carried away seconds before I had to accept my own challenge, but I had been wrong - it had been a test for her. I was simply affected by it and played with the same cards, just in a different way than expected.

The world, the lies that created the dreams built up in my head, they were all crumbling down around me as the truth sunk in.

I did not cry, had not cried for very, very many years. The act of crying was a weakness, for tears let people know that you were not strong enough to take what was thrown your way. You could not withstand life's troubles or torments and the silly little practice blows, and they said that you could never make it in the real world. The act or even idea was unheard of at the Academy, and years of training and refusal of emotions had stopped just that. Yet, at that moment, I felt tears sting my eyes, and I was forced to duck my head and blink them away. "You will be wrong."

"No."

"You will be wrong. You're wrong about me. I will prove you wrong, and prove that I'm not second best. I will be the best!"

Inga only slapped me and spit on the ground, the saliva hitting my cheek and causing me to wince. "Идиотка."

She left me there, frozen on the floor and bleeding from claw wounds across my arms, striding off to do something that I didn't know or care about. She didn't need to say more; her point was clearly presented, and I was all too aware of it.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, I lifted my head, now dry and bare of any tears that had rebelled and fallen against my wishes. Instead, it was shroud in anger and hatred - towards her, towards her hateful words, and towards the Parker boy who, even without knowing it, made my life hell. 

"I hate you, Peter Parker," I hissed to the open room, to no one but myself. "I hate you and everything you're doing. I hope you die. I hope that when I do this, you die a miserable death. иди к черту."

In my head, I knew he didn't deserve my anger - really, he was the only reason I was here in America and not falling apart in Russia - but otherwise, I had no one to throw my anger on. He was the reason that Inga was yelling at me, and he was now the direct recipient of my anger.

I would find a way to get to him and get the damn answers she craved so badly. I just needed to get rid of his friend, first.

[ dedicated to @carodelmonte for the beautiful covers made! ]

  идиот  - idiot

иди к черту - go to hell

I'm sorry for the lack of updates, but dudes, we hit 9k reads and almost 500 votes!??! What the fuck? The last time I updated this we were at almost 6k - that blows my mind, wow.

I promise there will be steady updates from now on because on the hiatus I managed to write six [well, five after this one's posted] chapters to have ready to edit, so there will be constant updates on Fridays/Saturdays on how Freya and Peter are coming along. This chapter isn't the most action-packed or exciting, I apologise, but I am promising now that the next chapter will be wayyy more interesting! I swear!

Thank you for reading!