Two

The therapist crossed her legs, cleared her throat, and set the pad of legal paper over one thigh. With a tone as clipped and refined as the nails on her hands, she looked to Lilith and asked her what her problem was.

It was the fourth time she'd asked this question, fifth if Lilith counted when she'd signed the papers and it asked the purpose of her visit. Like the last four times (the fifth being the only time Lilith had actually answered), she gave Miss Longsly a blank stare and counted the seconds that passed.

Seems we're locked in a stalemate.

The therapist set the pad down on the table between them and grabbed her cup of coffee instead. The silence stretched between them until it was snapped by the sound of her slurps.

"Lilith, I can't help you if you don't speak to me."

As if I ever wanted you to, Lilith thought. Instead, she opened her mouth, thought for a moment, and promptly closed it again with the click of her teeth.

I'm here because my brother killed himself. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from vocalizing this. I'm here because for eighteen years of my life, I was convinced I knew what I was doing with my pathetic existence. I thought I had it all in order, and now I'm stuck in a shit life with a shit education and no real direction to go in.

She didn't say a word of this, choosing instead to keep her gaze unfocused and pretended to meet the therapist's green eyes.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. Really, though, I'm not. Except for wasting her time, maybe. But she doesn't need to know that.

Ms. Longsly arched one blonde eyebrow, though whether in surprise or disbelief, Lilith couldn't discern.

"Well..." She tapped her pen against the paper pad and bit her lip.

Just like Oliver used to. Lilith shook the thought off. I can't think about him. Not now.

"This gives me a jump-off point, believe it or not. It's not a big one, no... But once you start talking, it'll at least mean you're more open to the situation... and that means you're comfortable."

Lilith nodded, almost mechanically, and mumbled out what she hoped sounded like an agreement. She gazed around the room.

Three walls were painted one of three different shades of cream. The fourth was pale green. All four of them were bare, which Lilith supposed was so that none of the bored patients can pick up a wayward statue and smash the therapist's head in. Probably a good move on Ms. Longsly's part.

Not that it mattered, though. Lilith knew she was strong enough to lift the couch she sat on and throw it out the window. Not that she wanted to. Not right then, anyway.

"Anyway, Lilith, our time is up for today." Ms. Longsly cast an anxious glance to the door for only a heartbeat before looking back to Lilith. "Same time next week, same day." She took a moment to scribble this onto a card for her, a moment which Lilith spent pondering the different ways she could avoid seeing the therapist ever again, then passes the card to her. It was pale pink in color, the information on it done in spidery handwriting.

The ink smudged under Lilith's thumb as she shoved it into a jacket pocket. "Thank you," she said, getting to her feet. "I'll see you next week."

Or perhaps I won't.

She headed for the door but stopped when the thought crossed her mind. At the door, she stopped. The doorknob was cold in her hands.

"You know, you have really shitty pens."

The door clicked shut behind her, soft as a whisper.

#

Jack and Cole were in their living room when Lilith made it back to their house later that day. Jack sat in one chair, her knees to her chest and all of her hair swept to one side. When she looked up, her hair swung from her shoulder to her back, cascading down her spine like a black waterfall.

Cole paused his game of Borderlands and set the controller on the coffee table. "How was the therapist?" he asked, tone tense. The air around Lilith turned stiff. Meanwhile, Jack clamped her thin lips together.

"Er..."

Lilith knew that Cole was expecting her to say that it went great. Just like he'd expected the last five times. Instead, she stood there, fingers tracing the edges of the appointment card crumpled up in her hand.

"It was... okay."

From her chair, Jack's eyes went wide. The finger at her mouth fell to her knees.

"Was it really?" Cole asks.

"Well... She did all the talking. And she asked me a lot of obvious questions. You know, things she would know if she'd read my papers. Like, why make me fill out that shit if you're just going to ignore it? I spent a good twenty minutes on them, you know. At least pay attention to it. Or pretend to."

Cole nodded. There was a melancholy look in his eyes as he picked the Xbox controller back up and resumed his game. He ran one hand through his blonde hair and got it tangled instead.

I've managed to let them down again. The revelation hit Lilith's stomach like a pile of rocks and she swallowed, hard.

"Look, I'm sorry..." she began, but Cole put up a finger from his controller and didn't look her way.

"Don't," he said. "Not right now."

Lilith nodded, her stomach clenching. Jack rose from her chair and came to Lilith's side, taking the doorknob from her shaking hands and closing the door behind her. Then she grabbed Lilith's shoulder and guided her to the kitchen. Cole didn't look up as they passed, but Lilith watched him as he slammed the controller into the table. His avatar was splayed out on the animated ground on his screen, its head detached from the rest of the corpse and cast to the side.

"You son of a bitch!" Cole shouted, shaking one fist at the TV screen. "No way you coulda fuckin' seen me!" Jack shook her head and pulled Lilith away.

"How about some tea?"

Jack sat Lilith down at the kitchen table before turning to the cabinet above the sink, across the kitchen, and getting two mugs.

We've gone through this routine before, Lilith thought as Jack got the Keurig machine set up. It whirred to life under Jack's slim hands. Next, she'll start apologizing for Cole...

"You know he doesn't mean it," Jack began, as if on cue. "He's just... getting agitated."

"With me." Lilith replied. Because it's true.

"No, it's just..." She paused to change the Keurig pod and place the other mug under the spout. "Well... okay, yes, I suppose it is with you."

I knew it.

"We've known you, what, two years now?"

Lilith nodded. "Yeah."

"And you've seen how many therapists now?"

And here she tries to convince me to discuss Oliver's suicide with other people...

"I mean, talking to someone is tough." She opened the top of the Keurig before promptly closing it again. "But Lilith, you really need to... get this off your chest."

Jack came back and set two mugs down on the table, pushing one in Lilith's direction. Steam curled in thick grey tendrils over the rims. Lilith caught the faint scent of peppermint as she picked it up and held it by her lips. She took a deep inhale as Jack sat in the chair across from her.

"I've seen six therapists in the past three months alone. The first was a creep, so no way was I going to talk to him. Two was a cheerleader in her high school career. Too much pep in her step. It's annoying as fuck. And there were too many objects in the room. I could've easily picked one up and killed them, you know."

Jack opened her mouth to reply but Lilith cut her off.

"In fact, I heard that someone killed the third therapist with her bird statue what... one week after our visit? Two? Amazing." Lilith paused and took a sip from the mug, relishing in the warmth that coated her tongue. Her taste-buds tingled, on the verge of being burnt.

"Lilith..."

"Number four killed himself after our visit... ironic, considering his job. Five wasn't what I'm looking for—"

"Then what are you looking for?" Cole muttered from the next room. Lilith set her mug down with a thunk.

"Three had told me to take pills. Five was a religious nutcase who tried to give me a bible – who the hell does that, Jack? And this one, number six. I don't know..."

Cole swore again, though whether at her or his game Lilith couldn't discern. Beside her, Jack took several moments to finish off her tea before looking up. Her mouth opened and closed, then again, then a third time.

"Lilith, have you ever considered that the reason you don't like any of them is because you're not trying?"

Lilith flinched, shoulders tensing. The chair back pressed into her spine as she shrank against it.

"Of course I am!" she snapped. Jack's expression didn't change, save for the slightest raise of one eyebrow.

"Are you?"

Quickly, Lilith nodded. Jack narrowed her eyes.

"Really trying, Lil. Not this feeble 'attempt' you're putting out for us. When's the last time you looked yourself over and went 'wow, I really need to fix this'?"

Lilith's gaze shot to the mug in her hands. The heat seeped through her fingers until she thought they would blister.

"I... yeah." She stood, setting the cup on the table. Jack looked up at her through half-lidded eyes.

In the next room, there was a thick cracking sound. Jack raised her head and sighed.

"Don't break the table, dimwit! I can't afford another."

"But that—"

"No excuses, Cole. Don't break the damn thing. You're in my house, not the other way around."

"...Fine."

Lilith's cell-phone rang from deep inside her jeans pocket. She knew before she'd fish the android out of her pocket that it was her father. The ringtone was basic – Lilith had never been one for fancy applications – but Russle Johnson was the only person who consistently called her. Or called her at all.

"Five bucks says it's my dad," Lilith said after a moment. Just to be on the safe side.

"Asking how the meet went?"

"No doubt about it."

Jack pursed her lips. "What do you want to say?"

"Probably the same thing I told him the last five times." Lilith slid her thumb across the screen to unlock it and held the phone to her ear. At once, her father's voice filled her head.

"Hey, Sweetheart. How did it go?"

His hesitation hit Lilith before his words did. She swallowed, the gears in her brain turning as she tried to think of a response.

"It was..."

She bit her lip. What do I tell him? On the other end of the line, she heard her father take a deep breath.

"It was promising," Lilith said at last. "She has more potential than any of the others."

"That's good." A shaky exhale. "I was beginning to worry... running low on options, you know."

Lilith nibbled the thumb nail on her free hand and leaned against the table. With a quick glance to Jack, she let a silent sigh escape her lips.

"Yes, Dad, I know."

Static crackled on the phone line for several seconds before her father opened his mouth again.

"Do you think she's a good fit?"

She glanced to Jack again. "Honestly? I don't know. She could be, if she doesn't turn out like therapist number five..."

"Or three," Jack added in a whisper. Lilith nodded, her hair bobbing around her face. Her father grunted.

"I can't afford anyone else, Lil. I hope you realize this."

For several heartbeats, Lilith didn't respond. Jack's eyes widened further with each moment that passed.

Everything okay? She mouthed. Lilith shrugged.

"I know, Dad. I know..."

Whatever else was on his mind was silenced by mumbled speech from wherever he was. He grunted again.

"Anyway, this isn't quite the time or place for this sort of thing. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"I am." Moments later, almost as if it were an after-thought, Lilith added, "Is Marlene there?"

She heard the voice again and her father said something she couldn't discern. His words were lost to the static. Then,

"Yeah, she's here. I need to go, okay?"

Lilith wrinkled her nose. "Alright. Tell her I said hello."

"Will do. I love you."

"You too." But she heard the phone click before she could open her mouth. Lilith slipped the phone into her pocket. Nothing moved inside the house for several moments.

Suddenly, Cole swore again. His voice was barely audible, overrun by the sound of his shoes hitting the ground. He walked into the kitchen with both hands buried in his pockets and his hair tousled.

"Having issues?" Lilith asked.

He didn't respond, instead heading straight for the fridge and taking out a carton of milk. After taking several swallows from the jug, he set it back and grabbed a jar of pickles. His mouth was half-full when he returned the glass jar to the fridge and he turned to Lilith.

"So, were you half-assing that phone call or did you actually mean it?"

Lilith gaze shifted to the tiles. "I... I meant it."

Cole snorted and the temperature in the room dropped. The hair rose along Lilith's arms. Tentatively, she raised her gaze to his face. Her eyes closed and she took a deep breath.

Typical.

It was only one word, but the amount of malice in Cole's thoughts made her stagger. She grabbed the edge of the table behind her to steady herself.

"Look, it's not my fault—"

"Like hell it's not," Cole growled back.

Lilith bit her lip so hard she tasted blood. Her fingers curled into the wood of the table-top.

The door opened.

"Jacklyn! Cole! I'm home!"

"In here!" Jack replied. Cole munched on his pickle, his eyes gleaming with barely-withheld contempt.

Frosty silence descended, broken only when Jack's mom walked into the kitchen. In her arms were two brown bags, the tops of which brushed her chin. After setting them on the table, she tucked a strand of dark brown hair behind her ear and turned to Lilith.

"Lilith!" she cried. "What a nice surprise! Did the..." She stopped and took a quick look around the kitchen. "I just walked into something, huh?"

Blindly, Lilith reached for her mug. It slid into the palm of her hand, the heat seeping through to her skin and growing warmer as she brought the cup to her lips.

"No, not really," she replied. "I think we were finishing up, anyhow. Weren't we, Cole?"

Over her mug, Lilith saw Cole shoot her a venomous stare. "Yeah," he replied, tone rough. "I suppose we are."

If Jack's mom felt the tension in the air, she didn't mention it. Instead, she gave Lilith a once-over before taking the mug from her hands and dumping the tea into her sink. She set it under the Keurig spout.

"How was the meeting?"

Lilith winced, her hands returning to the table top. Her fingers dug into wood as she said, "It was promising."

The machine gurgled. "Was it?" Jack's mom replied. "That's good."

"Oh sure," Cole mumbled. "Let's all just forget that she's said this shit five times now."

Lilith's heart sank at his comment, dropping into her stomach. Her gut twisted. From the Keurig, Jack's mom looked up and fired a glare in Cole's direction.

"I do not tolerate that sort of language, or negativity, inside of this house!" she snapped. Then she turned back to Lilith, holding out the steaming cup for her to take. The cup lurched, nearly falling from her shaking fingers. Jack grabs one of Lilith's wrists.

"Sorry," Cole replied. The look he shot her told Lilith that his words weren't sincere.