20th ♬

"You two are holding hands," said Jace's mother, as soon as we appeared at their front door. The look on her face gave all of her emotions away. Her eyes carefully traced the outline of our linked hands.

I felt exposed all of sudden. I wanted to say that we were not. Her words had so much meaning that I badly wanted to correct them. It was as if I had been accused of a thing that I didn't do. But something held me back, and I'd decided to throw her a doubtful look instead.

Jace stopped for a moment, studying what I was doing. And with a chuckle, he said, "Are you twitching your eyes again?"

I shot him a deadly glare in return.

"Your mother should know about this," Susan promptly blurted, snapping her fingers. Then she flipped over her phone. Somehow, in my eyes, the flipping did some dramatic effect on its own, like she was an agent who got some juicy scoop to share.

I suddenly imagined my mother's reaction, with her hands resting on her round tummy. And suddenly becoming aware of her condition, I warned her, "Don't startle her too much. Her term is only a few weeks away."

Unless we wanted a premature delivery to happen, which I believed was likely if Susan would blurt out the words without caution, she should really be careful on telling my mother the news. I had given up on stopping the two, because such things would only lead to failure and nothing more. Instead, it wouldn't hurt to let them have their own piece of heaven for a while, and feast on the latest news that I was certain would make the two of them very happy.

"You're right. I'll calm down first before calling her. But this is so unbelievable, I think I should call your dad, too," Susan kept on saying, pressing buttons on her phone.

For a moment, I wondered if she was talking about my dad or Chad. One second, it seemed like she was talking to me, and then I believed that the other statement was for Jace. But I could also consider that she could be talking to the phone, like the phone had a dad all of a sudden, since her blue eyes were fixated on her handset. Regardless, I'd decided to not give a care. It wasn't as if they would miss this kind of gossip. The information would be fed to them, even if they didn't want to.

It was mandatory.

"We're not really what you think..." I tried saying, elaborating things a bit. I could fully see where her excitement was coming from. But as of now, there wasn't such a thing going on between us.

"Come along, they won't stop anyway." Jace tugged my hand, half-dragging me as my eyes lingered on his mother, who was talking unceasingly on the phone. She managed to call someone, either one of the three.

"But then... that doesn't look good."

"Not necessarily," Jace answered, opening the door of his room.

I thought about clarifying it, but it seemed like his mind was set elsewhere, so I let the topic slid. He let go of my hand when we entered his room. There was a momentary hesitation on my part, as I stared at my right hand that was suspended in midair. Somehow, I liked the idea of his hand with mine.

It felt... right.

I looked around his room, taking off my cap and placing it on his table. I wiped away the beads of sweat that lingered on my forehead. His room was still the same, only a bit messy with open cartons here and there. His bed was still placed in the same way, and the cover was still half-way shoved aside. Easier to get in and out, he always said. There were bits and pieces here and there. I noticed a few used clothes hanging around.

"Sorry, the room's messy," Jace said, as he was grabbing something behind his dresser. "It didn't cross my mind this morning that I might invite you here today."

"Not at all. I've seen worse," I complimented, thinking about my brother's room. I walked over to the other side, avoiding papers with his compositions and a guitar on the floor. Pushing aside the gray curtain, I looked outside and caught a glimpse of our house, with my room directly in front of his.

From here, I couldn't see anything in my own room. I forgot that I secured the curtain in place with the use of pushpins. And my mom had no idea what I did to her favorite curtain yet. I was reminded again of how I was so eager on pushing him back, when in fact, having him around was easier, a lot easier.

I liked this feeling. I wasn't actually forgiven yet. But with him acting like the way he did years ago, I felt a bit of it—a flicker that somehow, what I did was still worthy of gaining forgiveness. It was a relief actually. Now, all I needed to do was to make up for the rest and work hard for the band, whose dreams I had once shattered. I couldn't bring back yesterday, but I got to try and make today better.

Turning my head back, I asked him, "Why are we here again?"

"Because of this," Jace said as he finally pulled something behind his tall dresser. He held it in his hand, and the corner of his lips pulled into a triumphant smile.

I stared at the yellow guitar in his hand, and my eyes softened at the sight. Every dents and marks, I was awfully familiar with them. Hesitating a bit, I walked over closer to him. I was guilty of leaving her before, and throwing her away. I wasn't worthy of her anymore.

"Oh, come on. Just take it. Why pull that face?" Jace finally said, taking my hand and putting Beanie in it.

"Were you mad because I threw her away?" I asked him. He was the one who gave it to me before as a gift for finally learning how to play the guitar.

"Yes, I was," he admitted. "But I figured it out right away, after I saw how much you hated me. I kind of expected her to be in ashes. So it was kind of understandable."

"Sorry about that. It's just that..."

He laughed.

"You're laughing again," I noted.

"Sorry, your face looked so distorted whenever you did that," Jace snickered, holding his stomach. "And your phone, it's ringing."

"Oh, I'm not going to fall for that again," I bickered.

"No, it really is," he said to me, still laughing to his heart's content.

I grabbed my phone from my pocket and saw that it was actually ringing. I thought I turned it off. Pressing the answer button after putting Beanie down, I said, "Claire?"

"Where have you been?" she shouted.

"It's a long story," I replied, watching as Jace stared at me. He took a seat on his bed. I suddenly felt that self-consciousness creeping in, along with the rumbling in my stomach. I hated it when he did that. Any girl would feel this way whenever he stared that way. I was no exception. With all the apologizing and explanations that came along, my guard when it came to him suddenly crumbled down.

"I have the time. You could start at the moment when you hung up on me," Claire suggested, a hint of eagerness in her voice.

"I..." I trailed off, seeing Jace's stare still lingering on me.

"Just tell her," Jace said, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

I sat down beside him, putting a breathable distance between us. But that didn't last long as Jace placed his right ear to my phone and listened to our conversation. I gasped a little with the touch of our arms against each other. With a little shakiness in my voice, I told him, "For a guy, you sure are nosy."

He smiled a bit, not caring about what I had said. Then it was Claire, who replied—with a shriek, "You're with a guy?"

"Yeah," I muttered.

"Who?" Claire asked. Before I could even answer, she hastily added, "Jace, right?"

"How did you—"

Jace grabbed my hand and spoke to the mouthpiece, "Got that right."

"Wow!" Claire exclaimed, sharing half of Susan's excitement a while ago. I could almost imagine the sparkle in her eyes.

"You two are together? And from what I think, in good terms?" she was shrieking.

I shooed Jace away, turning to the other side of the bed. "I don't really know. Better than how we used to be."

"I can see where this is all heading. It's so romantic how you two get back to each other's arms again, after all those years of hating each other," Claire carried on with her fantasies.

"Wait, there's nothing like that going on. We just... well, we sort of made up... I think," I said, looking at Jace for confirmation. He didn't look my way, even if I made my voice a little louder so that he could hear. Instead, he had that one look of satisfaction on his face as he stared outside.

"Nothing? Not even a kiss maybe?" Claire pressed on, disbelief clouding her voice.

"Of course not!"

"Why?" Claire asked. "You have no idea how much I wanted you guys to be together. You two are so meant to be. It was frustrating to watch... to just watch. So please, just tell him you love him and get it over with."

"Slow down," I said to her.

I noticed Jace turned his head a little toward my direction. His gaze was suddenly attentive. Unless he could read minds or hear the other line, he couldn't possibly know what Claire was babbling about.

"This is the perfect time. And when you said 'slow down', you just confirmed that you still have feelings for him," Claire continued saying on the other line.

"I don't... know. Don't force it on me. Things are going crazy. I feel stuck," I told Claire. Plus, there was the moment when Jace said that he didn't love me. This was very confusing. And unlike her, I hadn't been in a relationship before. From my personal history of utter humiliation, no one had shown any interest in dating me. And it wasn't like I had entertained them myself. I was preoccupied with him. I was obsessed with his revenge and everything that had happened. His thoughts filled my head, with burning hatred.

And now someone was telling me about love instead. Should I even let myself fall in love with him again? The opposite was being offered to me once more. It was so confusing, like a new gadget presented to you for the first time, and then they all expected that you already knew how to use it well. I used to love him before. But now, all I could say was that it was nothing but a distant memory, a thought that I had once shoved aside into oblivion.

"Fine, then think about it. I know you still love him. Your eyes don't lie, Reese. You already crossed over the thin line separating hatred and love. You're not in between the two anymore. A burning passion is still a burning passion. And without hatred in it, there's only love that's left," Claire told me.

"I'll think about it?" I suggested, uncertain what else to say.

"Oh," she said. "That's not actually the reason why I called again. I almost forgot."

"Really? Then why—"

Before I could finish what I was saying, she asked me, "Do you have a laptop or something like that around you?"

I looked over at Jace. "She's asking if you have a computer here?"

Jace nodded a bit, standing on his feet and walking over to his table. From the pile of compositions, he miraculously pulled a laptop from it. Opening it beside me, he said, "Here you go."

"Thanks," I muttered to him. Then getting back at Claire, I asked, "So what do you want me to do now?"

"Look at my creation," she said. "I've been keeping this from you until today. It's already finished!"

"What?" I asked, clueless at what she was talking about.

"Open your Facebook account and look at the new page you admin. It's called Brittany Sparks' Shocking Secret," Claire said to me.

"Brittany what?" I asked again, typing my email address and password. Then realizing what she just said, I asked, "Why are you hacking my account?

"Your password is way too lame. What is it? IhateJaceHamilton?"

"Fine, so you opened it. But then why did you create a page?" I asked her instead.

"I'm just beginning. I still need something," she replied.

After seeing my news feed, I saw the page that she was talking about, the one with the Brittany thing. Jace was beside me, sitting on the floor as we both stared at the screen. And pressing the link, we were both shocked at what we had seen.

"Did you make this?" Jace immediately asked me, staring at the wildly disturbing photos and captions.

"No, Claire did," I answered, as baffled as he was. I shook my head again, the phone barely staying at my left hand.

"Did you like it? Gosh, it took me forever to get all that. You know, with Mason not around and you being stupid, I don't know what else to do," Claire reasoned out.

I wasn't sure if I should thank her or what. It seemed inappropriately appropriate. The photos, every single one of them made things a lot clearer, like looking at the world through a clear glass window instead of a tainted one. And of course, Jace here was shocked, probably as astounded as I was. Or more than that.

"Why..." I stared at the photos.

"We're not actually going to humiliate her. It's far from what she's done to you, so don't think of it that way. We're not like her," Claire emphasized.

"Then what is this for?" I asked her, baffled.

"To threaten her and make her stop doing whatever she's doing to mess up your peaceful life," Claire said evenly.

"Threaten her?" I echoed faintly.

"I'm thinking of capturing a photo of the page, especially the albums since it's a treasure, and send it to her," Claire laid out the plan.

"And then?"

"That's it. I'm sure she'll shut up when she sees all that," she laughed.

I felt a smile tugging the corner of my lips. Staring at the photos of Brittany Sparks drooling over Jace, I saw some hope, a scintillating anticipation that somehow she would soon agree to leave me alone. That was all I'd ask of her. I had no need of her apology. It wasn't as if she would mean any of it. All I wanted was for her to stay away from me as possible.

"Is this even real? Not photoshopped?" asked Jace.

I asked Claire about it. She laughed as she said, "No, it's not. It's all about hard work. I discovered a blog that she used to post those pictures. She's not using her real name there. And then that's where she drooled over him. As you can see, it's still going on. I saw some recent pictures of Jace in there. And the captions are so unbelievable. It's like someone who's helplessly in love. Close to a stalker. Just a step away."

"Is she really that person?" I asked for confirmation.

"Yeah, positive. I mean she blurred the faces in her blog wherein she put those photos and wishful thinking. And then to her Facebook account, you'll see those photos mingled with other pictures like nothing is going on. But really, what kind of thinking is that? It's not like she changed the color of her dress or something. And she even put it on her own Facebook account. She's far from being smart," Claire answered, pleased with herself.

I stared again at the one taken four or five years ago, before I met Jace, in one of Chad's party. The caption on the left was: If I can only have him. It was the one with the blurred faces on another site. On the right, the one that she showed the world on her Facebook account, as she mixed it with all of the photos taken from that same night, it was: Jace and I.

In the photo, they were loosely standing beside each other, but you couldn't miss the glitter in her eyes. She was in love. And you couldn't deny that it was the same picture, the same one-shoulder, lavender dress of her and Jace's blue tuxedo. That was one among the many that Claire had collected.

"Did I ever tell you that I love you?" I asked Claire, happiness finally sinking in my voice.

"Oh, please. You can always treat me to something good when you get your paycheck. But how will you get it when you're not even working for the past few days?" she muttered.

"Oh, right, I forgot. And there's still the laptop that I owe her," I said gloomily.

"Why not use this for the laptop too?" Claire suggested.

"That's hardly even fair," I answered. "Or maybe not."

"It's not, trust me," Claire laughed at the other line.

"So what's the one that's missing again?" I asked her, suddenly remembering what she had said a while ago.

"The happy ever after," Claire replied.

"What happy ever after?" I asked, repeating her words.

"Of the love of her life and her enemy being together. Don't you think it will give her a shock?" she said with utmost satisfaction.

"That's a good idea. But how—" An instant message pop up and it was from no one else but her, talk about how everyone seemed to have the perfect timing except for me. I said to Claire, "I got a message... from her."

"Really? Oh, right. She's online. What did she say?" Claire hurriedly asked.

"She called me a nasty name and then asked how I was doing being a loser," I replied.

"Then tell her that you and Jace are now okay. She'll freak out. Period."

I did what she said, hesitating a bit when I finished typing the words. I looked over to Jace, who was still sitting beside me, asking for a confirmation if we were really okay. He nodded and pressed the enter button himself.

Jace and I are okay now. Didn't you hear?

Oh, really? Proof? Last time I checked, he was still angry with you.

"Oh, but don't spill our secret yet. This is not yet the time," reminded Claire.

"Why?" I asked.

"Trust me. I still need the happy ever after," she emphasized.

"Right. But she's asking for a proof," I said.

"She's going out with Nick, right?" she asked me.

"I think so," I answered. "From the looks of it."

"I'm sure she's only using him as her front. Ask her for a double date and kill her with it," she soundly suggested.

"Double date with who?" I immediately asked.

"Jace of course, who else?" Claire pointed out the obvious.

"With him?" I echoed back, looking dubiously at Jace.

"What?" he asked.

"She said to invite Brittany to a double date and well, crush her with it? I'm not so sure, but it's something like that," I tried to explain.

"Oh, okay. Want me to tell her that?" Jace asked, his fingers typing down the words himself.

"All right, seeing that you're already ahead of me," I said.

"So what did he say?" asked Claire, impatience resounding in her voice.

"He said okay. And he's the one sending the message to Brittany," I answered, staring at Jace, who was lightly tapping on the keyboard.

"Oh, great! This will be so much fun," Claire happily chirped.

Fun?

"And Claire, before I forget, happy birthday," I greeted her.

"Just come over, will you? Bring Jace along, we'll have a blast," Claire replied. I remembered her gift that I totally forgot, and also my bike. And then a moment later, our reply came about.

Cool. You're so going to be a loser on Saturday. Remind me to laugh when he doesn't appear.

Definitely fun, I was certain now. For the first time in years, I wanted to take her head on again and play her game. And I would tell her about what Claire had found out on Saturday. All I needed to do was to remind her to laugh when her jaw reached the dirt ground in surprise. She could count on that.

And so I laughed to myself. So all along, it was all about Jace Hamilton. I didn't see that coming—Brittany Sparks constantly wishing that Jace Hamilton was hers. She was good at hiding it, but her outlet for those affections gave her away.