Golden hair, blue eyed stare,

Why are women always taken for granted?

Lace and silk, our breasts as white as milk,

How can we not be perfect?

Men run around,

Screw around the town

Men are a disgrace to us

They lie and they cheat,

They can never truly leave,

Their mommies behind

Men should have kids,

Open up their eyelids

They should have babies stuffed up in their crotch

But instead they come home and drink down some scotch,

Supposedly so righteous

See what it feels like to be a girl,

It would change their world

Carry around breasts,

Instead of smoking cigarettes

Thinking they are so cool

To not play by the rules

Men think being a girl is so easy

But when girls get preggers they get oh so queasy

Perhaps it's time for them to push the watermelon out of the straw

So that once and for all we'd have the luck of the draw

9 months, swollen ankles, cravings and cramps

Would shrink their dicks to postage stamps.

Maybe they should push those strollers

Instead of gluing their phones to their heads

Important business meetings? For real? Man you are obsessed.

Get a vasectomy cause without your dick, to me you are worthless

Comb your hair, comb your hair

Au contraire

Pull your pants up, quit being a slob

And for Pete's sake, get a stable job!

Trying to look fly takes you a day,

For me it takes a minute, I'm on my way!

Men should have kids,

Instead of counting up bids

They should know how it feels

Hormones raging, re-cycling, cooking meals

They can have fun,

With their loaded guns,

But once they are done

They all think that they've won

That they've stunned us,

Are above us

Spreading disease

Or those fucked STD's

Protection not used

Our trust beaten abused

It's not all fun and games

While all you do is pick out names

We expect to be loved

Not taken advantage of or shoved

We want the whole package like marriage

Before we commit to the baby carriage

Men should have kids as a test

To see if they're ready for all the rest

Talking big, talking smack

Being a part of the lion pack

Doesn't endear you to us at all

For you are the one holding the ball

Why do we hate, why are we mad?

Duh! We want you to be a dad

And just this once too be a mom

Because that would be da bomb

Why do we hate, why are we sad?

Duh! We want you to be forever glad

Be a man, we want seduction

Whisper in our ears, call us belo'ved

Commitment is hard; sure you men call it a pain

But we women adjust to its cuffs and its chains

Put a ring on it man, you need to understand,

You are the lions and we are the lambs!

Women are not cars

We are not from Mars

So settle with us, we are soft

Unless you tick us off, then off you go, TO THE LOFT!

Strong hearted, equipped with love

We want to be cooed at like doves

Please listen to us, you low life men out there

Not to the ones who treat us with respect and with care

We want to be treasured, but we also want independence too

You can pull some of the weight,

You who have muscles, from Gods, once great

We want our heroes

Not you zeros

Our fantasies, erotic dreams

Are not as farfetched as it seems

Sensual, sexy, loyal, hard working men

Is all part of the big plan

We give you it all, our hearts, bodies, and souls

All we ask in return is for you men to not act like fools

Men should have kids from now on

Perhaps than they won't so fast be gone

Whether you're pauper or prince doesn't matter

As long as you're not mad as a hatter

You know you want us, you know we're right

So come on be strong for us with all of your might

If you love, cherish, protect us and serve

You will get from us the adoration you deserve

So think about everything that we said

As tonight you put your body firmly onto your bed.

***Collaborated with Maria Errico***