"Loeisal Malmdan Company," I answered. Kasabay no'n ay ang pagtaas ng balahibo ko sa katawan. Sikat ang kompanyang iyon at sila ang nagmamay-ari ng pinakamahal na pabango sa buong Pilipinas. They just started a couple of years ago, but their market is getting bigger now. I wonder how their marketing supervisor works. As a business management student majoring in marketing, I am really curious how big businesses and companies are handled by their marketing associates. Kahit maganda ang products or services, kung hindi maganda ang advertising and promotion, hindi ito papatok sa masa. Dapat talaga ay marunong kang magbenta.

"You mean that famous perfume company? They say they wanted to conquer the world of perfume."

I nodded. That's what impressed me. The mission, vision, and core values of that company are unbelievable.

"Hindi ko alam na mahilig ka pala sa perfume, Thea." Her remark brought a smile to my face. Kapag usapang pabango ay nagbabago ang mood ko. I don't know, but there's something in perfume that flatters me. Naririnig ko palang, kinikilig na ako. Paano pa kaya kung balang araw ay magkaroon ako ng sariling perfume brand na tatangkilikin ng mga tao?

"Hindi naman sa mahilig, but I discovered that I have the strength to know a smell or scent immediately and to identify it and its differences." Muli kong naalala ang nangyari noon. Noong magising ako sa isang hotel room na ang naiwan lang sa akin ay ang amoy ng pabango bukod sa isang pulang necktie. Mabilis ko iyong natandaan, kaya nalaman ko kaagad kung sino ang may-ari ng necktie na patunay na siya ang nagdala sa akin sa lugar na iyon.

I heaved a sigh; even in these normal things, I still remember Ismael, which makes me feel like he never left me. I missed his scent. It lingers in my soul.

"Gosh, Thea! Just you saying your dreams to me is enough to make me proud. I hope things work out great for you."

Ngumiti ako. "Sa 'yo rin, Sav. Good luck with your upcoming cosmetic brand. I know you'll nail it. I'm waiting for our collaboration in the future."

Tumawa siya. "Of course! Kulang ang pisikal na ganda! Dapat mabango rin!"

*****

Lumabas na ako sa exam room dahil natapos ko nang lahat ng exams namin. Sana lang ay maipasa ko ang lahat ng subjects ko. I really need to graduate this year. I don't want to waste another year of my life being a student.

"Jothea!"

Napalingon ako sa tumawag sa akin. Nakita ko si Raviel na naglalakad papunta sa dako ko. Kusang kumunot ang noo ko nang maalala ang naging pagtatalo namin ng nakaraan. Saan siya humahanap ng lakas ng loob para magpakita pa sa akin?

"Are you down for dinner? My treat," sambit niya na mas lalong ikinakunot ng noo ko. Baliw ba siya?

"What are you up to, Raviel?" tanong ko habang binibigyan siya ng blankong tingin.

He smirked feistily. "Don't you want to know where Ismael is? I know where he is now."

My breathing stopped. What in the world? How would he know where Ismael is when it was difficult for his family to find him? "Are you trying to mess with me?" naiinis kong sambit sa kaniya.

"Nope. And if you think I'm lying, why don't you see it for yourself?"

Nagngingitngit ang mga ngipin ko habang nakatingin sa kaniya. I decided to step into his car without knowing where he would bring me. Mabilis at mabigat ang paghinga ko dahil sa maaaring malaman ko tungkol kay Ismael. Nasaan siya? Alam ba talaga ni Raviel, kung nasaan si Ismael? Paano?

But somehow, it is a confirmation that Raviel is really after him. Considering that he'd do a job to find Ismael proves that my hunch was right.

It was six in the evening when the car stopped. I looked outside the window and saw that we had arrived at a familiar restaurant. It was the Black Gourmet, where my family and I had dinner once with Ismael.

"What are we doing here?" matigas kong tanong sa kaniya, pero imbes na sagutin niya ako ay bumaba siya sa sasakyan para pagbuksan ako ng pinto. Bumuntong-hininga ako tsaka lumabas. I was startled when he put his arms on my waist. "Don't touch me," singhal ko.

Tumawa lang siya. "Fine, fine! It was my habit. Sorry!"

I rolled my eyes before walking inside the restaurant. "Where is he?" tanong ko habang ipinapasada ang mga mata sa paligid ng restaurant.

"Don't be too impatient. Let's eat first," bulong niya habang nakangiti pa rin na parang aso.

"I am not here for that, Raviel. Don't waste my time."

"Waste some for me, and I'll tell you where he is," tuso niyang sambit sa akin. He led me to the dining table, and I had no choice but to do what he wanted. Kung hindi lang ako sabik na malaman kung nasaan si Ismael ay hindi ako sasama sa kaniya.

He's smiling from ear to ear and looks like he's enjoying his dinner, while I am on the verge of vomiting. Paano naaatim ng sikmura niyang kumain habang may iniisahan siyang tao? Hindi ko alam kung ano bang nagawa ni Ismael sa kaniya kung bakit parang gusto niya itong sirain.

"Hindi ka ba kakain?" tanong niya.

"Wala akong gana."

"Eat, baka ako ang mawalan ng gana sa 'yo." He cut the steak like a psycho. He ate it like it was the fresh flesh of a human. Then he sipped the red wine like it was blood. I don't really know what kind of human he is, but I can sense that he can do whatever comes to his mind, and I'm starting to be frightened of how weird he acts and looks at me.

Nagsimula na akong kumain. Kahit ayaw tanggapin ng tiyan ko ay pinilit ko pa ring lumunok. Nakita ko siyang ngumiti.

"Look, I'm really sorry. I have invited you so many times to grab a meal with me, but you always tell me next time. You didn't give me even a single chance to show my apologies for what I did. I am really, really sorry," wika niya na alam ko namang hindi totoo. May sira ba siya sa utak? Ano bang trip niya? I don't understand him.

I sucked my teeth as I stared at him blankly. Why not just show his true colors? He's wasting his time faking and wearing a mask, trying to fool me. There is no way I will buy that. I can smell how filthy he is, even if he hides it. "I just did that because I care for you. You know that I have really liked you since then, Jothea. That professor was just using you. I gave you a warning, didn't I?"

My fists clenched. "Sinong niloloko mo?" I uttered as I removed the table napkin from my lap. "Don't dare talk to me again if you don't want to hear something depressing." I marched my way away from him, but what he said halted my feet.

"Then, I won't tell you where Ismael is."

I exhaled. Hindi bale na. Padabog akong lumabas ng Black Gourmet at pumara ng sasakyan para makauwi. Nanggagalaiti ako sa inis. Sinusubukan talaga ng taong 'yon na inisin ako. Kung ako pa siguro ang Jothea noon, hindi ko na napigilan pa ang sarili ko. Kung wala lang akong pinahahalagahan ngayon, lalabanan ko siya.

"City of Lourdez," sambit ko sa driver nang tanungin niya ako kung saan ako patungo. Pinaandar niya na ang sasakyan. Ako naman ay patuloy pa rin sa pagkontrol ng hininga. Napakahirap pakalmahin ng sarili kapag inis na inis ka na. Inuubos niya ang pisi ko.

Oo, may utang na loob ako sa kaniya dahil siya ang nagpasok sa akin sa casino. Siya ang dahilan kung bakit may trabaho ako at nakaraos ako sa araw-araw dahil walang ipinapadala sa akin ang mga magulang ko, pero hindi naman sapat na rason iyon para umasta siya ng ganito sa akin. Is he trying to manipulate me or whatsoever? Mina-mind condition niya pa ako na gusto niya ako kaya ginawa niya 'yong pangingialam sa buhay ko? I was really happy with my secret relationship with Ismael, but he ruined it. And for the nth time, I wasn't convinced he did that for me. May iba siyang agenda. Si Ismael lang.

I'll just wait for Ismael, and I will make sure I sue Raviel for trespassing, stalking, and invasion of privacy.

*****

I have been watching the previous footage of the CCTV, but still, there's no shadow of Ismael. Nakakabalisa din pala ang ganito. Parati kong tinitingnan ang camera habang nagbabakasakaling dumaan siyang muli sa bahay ko, pero wala siya. Wala na ba siyang dahilan para bumisita?

I heaved a sigh and just focused my attention on our graduation practice. Ilang araw na ang lumipas nang ilabas na ang resulta ng exams namin. Thank God I passed it all.

"Wala pa rin siya?" tanong ni Sav.

Tumango ako. "It seems like my idea is failing."

Tinapik niya ako sa balikat. "Don't lose hope. Magpapakita rin siya sa iyo."

"Paano kung hindi?"

Pinagmasdan niya ako bago bumuntong-hininga. "Hindi ba't sabi nga niya endure and trust him? Maghintay pa tayo. Babalik din siya. Nangako siya, hindi ba?"

I exhaled and glanced at my hand to see where the promise ring Ismael gave me was. "Sana nga."