After delivering the blow that I am the sole reason for her utter unhappiness at the world, my sister storms out the bathroom.

"Nathalie, wait!" I shout after her but to no avail. 

I slam my fists down on either side of the basin and a frustrated sigh puffs from my mouth. My eyes flick up to catch Harry staring at me in the mirror.

"Well played, I asked you to stay out of sight until we'd left," I snap at his reflection.

"I was only having a bit of fun," he dismisses far too easily for my current mood.

My clipped tone reinforces my annoyance. "Harry, I wanted my birthday to be a happy affair for everyone."

"And it is. She'll be fine when we get back to the table," he brushes aside again.

"Don't be so sure about that!" I stride angrily towards the door. "I'm going back, please promise me you will stay here for a minute or two."

I grip the handle to jerk it open but immediately feel his presence behind me. His arm reaches over my shoulder as he leans to rest his palm flat on the surface of the door to stop me from leaving.

His calm tone brushes my cheek. "I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to upset anyone."

I hang my head, fixating my glance on his rose tattoo. The inking is so intricate, just like the flower itself that symbolises so many different emotions and expressions depending upon its colour. The most obvious is a red rose of love but I wonder to myself if his tattoo was in colour, what colour it would be?

"I'll apologise to her later if it'll make things better." He wraps his free arm around my waist, tugging me back into his chest. "Okay?" Lingering puckered lips brush across my shoulder.

I rest my hand over the top of his and relax my head back onto his shoulder. "There is no need, I'm sorry too. I just, she's so up and down all the time, I don't want to do anything unnecessary to aggravate that."

He glances down at me and plants a soft kiss on my forehead, resting his lips there as he speaks. "I wasn't thinking, forgive me, Beautiful?"

His adorable pout cannot contain my smirk. I raise my pointer finger in the air at him and push away from his clutches. "You can stop with the charm offensive right now!"

Opening the door, I disappear down the corridor with his subtle wolf-whistle on my tail. "A few kisses and she's putty in my hands," he brags.  

I glance back over my shoulder at him peering round the door and wink. "Whatever you want to think is fine by me, Handsome."

Harry dutifully waits for a few minutes before returning back to the table where my family is busy chatting.

Nathalie is quiet but knocking back the wine. At one point, Billy seems to ask her to slow down but she shoots him a look then ignores him and pours herself another large glass.

Despite her tension, we sit and enjoy a lovely meal in the great surroundings and although a celebratory atmosphere prevails, I feel relieved when desserts are over and coffee is declined in favour of drinks with my birthday cake that is waiting at the comfort of home.

-*-

Olive makes hot drinks whilst I grab a bottle of champagne out the fridge.  I am surprised when Nathalie appears with yet another glass of wine in her hand.

I decline Olive's offer of milk in Harry's tea simply commenting he does not drink milk late at night. Nathalie, clearly still vexed, rolls her eyes. I am starting to tire and have just about had enough of her attitude. I politely ask Olive to take the tray of drinks to the others and say we will come through in a minute.

My feet turn swiftly. "What was all that about earlier, Nathalie? It's my birthday and you are spoiling it. If you cannot be civil to me then fine but just for Mum and Dad, please try to make it a happy family occasion."

"Oh, the ever so kind Lily, how touching you are," she says flippantly.

"You are drunk," I state.

"And you aren't," she slurs.

"No, in case you had forgotten my meds prevent me from drinking at the moment," I remind her, frankly.

"Of course, yes, the meds because of THE accident. The night you let Daddy down. He was so disappointed in you," she exaggerates the words with a sarcastic pout.

My blood is reaching boiling point. "Yes, that accident, the one where Percy died and I was injured. Do you have any idea how hard it has been for me? Do you?" My voice has risen to a half shout. "You can say what you want but I remember you at my bedside. You were going to be a better sister yet here you are ripping into me on my birthday of all days."

Movement over Nathalie's shoulder catches my attention. Harry's worried frown appears around the doorframe.  He gathers my birthday cake and mouths 'you ok?' and I half-smile my 'yes'.  He hesitates for a moment, almost making doubly sure I am okay, before he closes the door leaving the two of us to it.  

I am attempting to hold my nerve but it is wavering. "Why are you being like this? I don't understand."

That is her catalyst. She takes the offered baton and runs as it all comes flying out of her mouth in a rant of pent up aggression and anger that strikes me has been festering for sometime.

"You have always been free from expectations," she blurts.

I shake my head in denial. "That is untrue."

"No it's not.  You were allowed to be who you wanted to be. Grandma adored you as you two pottered around playing gardeners. Meanwhile, I had to stay inside and play incessant piano scales over and over. You had lovely ballet lessons; I had a boring maths tutor for god sake. That just about says it all."

"You are remembering everything skewed. Grandma planted seeds with me to keep me occupied because I kept banging the keys and disturbing Grandad teaching you the piano. And the maths tutor, well you had the academic potential whereas I was always more creative."

"Well, from where I am standing, it never felt equal."

"Mum and Dad have never treated us the same because we are not the same but they treated us fairly. I have always struggled so much with my studies whereas you, I cannot tell you how in awe I am of you and how that inspires me to keep trying. You have love around you from family, friends at University and Billy. You are beautiful and bright. You have it all Nathalie."

"Billy?" She singles out from my list with a look of horror plastered across her face .

"Yes. You two have been together for a while now.  I thought you were happy?"

"We were," she mumbles.

"Were? What's changed?" I question.

"Him. He's changed everything," she mutters.

"I'm not following, Billy's changed?" I ask.

"Never mind," she discards.

"No, if you want to talk, I'm here to talk. Please tell me." I coax gently.

"Ok then, it's not Billy, it's Harry."

"What's Harry got to do with you and Billy?" I query, confused.

"Oh just forget it." Her eyes fall to the floor so she does not have to look at me.

"No I won't, tell me?" I plead softly.

"No!" She tries to make a hasty retreat, backing up towards the door but I suss her plan and grab her sleeve to prevent her from leaving.

"Tell me Nathalie, please. All cards on the table, we have this out now."

She straightens herself up and looks at me whilst wiping away a few stray tears. Then she blurts out of nowhere, "because Billy has never and will never look at me the way Harry looks at you."

Tears spill down her face and she mimics the actions as she cries. "The way he runs his thumb over your fingers when he holds your hand; he stands when you stand to leave; he is always near you and looking at you. Just then at the door, he came to see if you were okay. Where was Billy? Nowhere, that's where. Harry, he loves you. I see it and I am jealous because Billy has never loved me that way and he never will." Then she hides her face behind her hands.

I stand motionless looking at her hurting. All this time I thought she was the one in control, the happy one and yet now here she is so vulnerably broken. I simply cannot be mad at her.  I tug her sleeve and pull her into a hug. She cries again and so do I.

"I don't like to see you are hurting. Harry and I are still new in our relationship.  You and Billy were like that once upon a time."

"We aren't like that now. I cannot remember the last time he told me he loved me. It's like we go through motions. We are so unexciting."

"Nathalie, if you are not happy then don't stay together."

"It's not just that, my whole life is stale. I feel such a failure. I'm fed up with University."

"Then leave University," I state like it is the easiest thing in the world.

She pulls back in surprise. "What? I can't."

"Why not? Because it's what is expected of you? Nathalie, if I have learned anything since my accident it is life is too short to spend doing stuff you dislike. If you could do anything right now what would do?"

"I don't know how to do anything else but study."

"Well get thinking about it because you need a change; to do something different. You owe it to yourself to close those books and get out into the world and experience something new and challenging that's just for you."

She pauses and I sense the cogs of her brain turning. I hold her at arms length. "Feel better?"

Her alcohol flushed face screws up and her puffy eyes shed more tears. "I didn't mean what I said, any of it.  I'm so sorry for ruining your birthday."

"You haven't, in any case it's not over yet." I hold my hand out to her. "Dad's got the old videos out of us as kids. It's always good for a laugh!" I titter.

She manages a weak smile and places her hand in mine. As we get to the door she stops us. "Lily, thank you."

"No need, you are my sister and I love you. Always remember that."

We return to the happiness of the others.  A beaming Harry appears with my delicious looking flower and summer fruit topped birthday cake as another chorus of 'Happy Birthday' sings out.  I blow out the candles then everyone takes either champagne or tea from the tray and Mum raises her glass to toast me on my special day and give thanks for the gift and love of family.    

At the table, I cut generous portions of cake for Harry to hand around.  He steals quick kisses in between gathering each slice in a pretty serviette.  Once everyone has a piece, he returns to my side to grab some for himself.  He catches me watching him lick the frosting off his fingertips.  His sweet dimpled smile rushes towards me and his sugary lips find mine once more.     

We all relax with eyes fixed on the TV screen as the video plays footage of toddler me with an angry face chasing my rabbit, Dandelion, round the garden because he had chewed a hole in my paddling pool.  My attempts to catch him were all in vain.  

We watch a smiling Nathalie riding the bike we have just thrown in the skip during the summerhouse clear out. Dad runs behind her, his hands wide ready to catch her if she falls at her first time without stabilisers.

The film skips to us both riding on donkeys at Weymouth beach then eating ice creams in front of the giraffe house at Marwell Zoo. Mine melts and falls in a big dollop on the floor. My tears soon stop when Nathalie shares half of hers with me.

We take much pleasure in ribbing Dad over him and Nathalie attempting to put up a tent at our holiday campsite in Cornwall.  His colour coordinated tent pole system should have worked but somehow only ever caused more confusion.  Then we proudly stand in front of Dippy the Diplodocus at the Natural History Museum in London with me pointing up at him saying 'big' and Nathalie responding 'of course it's big, it's a dinosaur, silly.'

Finally, there is both of us meeting baby Thomas for the first time after he was born. Nathalie proudly holds him across her lap with me standing beside her and stroking his head.

Everyone laughs and coos at the films but no one more than Nathalie whose hand holds tightly in mine and squeezes it every time we are together on screen.

Videos over and yawns all round, everyone declares it is time to call it a night. I thank everyone for a wonderful day as they filter off to bed.

A weary Olive declares it is way past her bedtime as well. In the hallway, I suddenly remember her presents and feel guilty because I have not opened them yet. Unfazed, she explains that her box of tricks is mainly for Harry and I so we should open it just us two. I try to get her promise that there is not anything embarrassing inside to which she taps her nose with a 'that's for me to know and you to find out' smirk.

I wander across the hallway towards the living room but pause on the threshold to study Harry. He is standing with his back to me, taking in the pictures dotted along the mantelpiece whilst he swigs the last of the bubbles from his champagne glass.  He glances up into the mirror and catches my reflection behind him.

A slow smile sweeps the corners of his lips to rise upwards.  "And then there was two." 

He spins round and I go to him, sinking into the cuddle of his arm around my shoulders. "What a day."

"Are you tired?"  Two frown lines furrow in between his brows.  "Do you want me to go?"

I duck out of his embrace and extend my hand out to his.  "You are not going anywhere.  Come on."

He pauses. "Are you sure about me staying over, I mean have your parents said it's okay? If not, I can sleep down here."

I stand grinning back at him. "Endearing as that sounds, Handsome, we're not teenagers. Now come on and bring Olive's box with you."