We walked all the way through the park, ending at the bottom of the hill where a little stream flowed through and into the sewer. I sat up against a tree next to the river, my back up against it. My hood was over my head which covered my face, and my sleeves were pulled up over my hands. I wrapped my arms around my legs and kept them up against my chest, making them perfect to rest my chin. Kazuna sat on the far end of the park bench next to me. He kept silent as he said he would and watched the streamflow. I kept thinking of the fight, and the thought of just disappearing kept going into my mind. I started to get urges just to walk around all night, but I knew that Kazuna would follow me. Eventually, Kazuna would have to go home to sleep, but I knew he wouldn't leave me alone until I returned. I kept silent as I focused on my breathing, trying not to start crying. My thoughts kept going on the negative side of things. I heard shifting to the right, then a huff. I took a deep breath. "Is it getting too late for you? You can go home, I'll be back later," I said, hoping that he would go get some sleep. Kazuna sighed. "Like I said before we came out, I'm not going back until you do," he reminded me again. I looked up at the sky. "You do know it's like one in the morning," I said, as he chuckled. "I will keep repeating myself," he said, again. I took a deep breath. "I'm sorry about all of this. I didn't mean to get them into a fight," I said as Kazuna chuckled. "Don't apologize. This wasn't the first fight they had. They bicker all the time and just like before, they'll get over it and everything will be fine again," he stated. I took a deep breath. "I don't think this is going to be a good idea," I said, as Kasuna looked at me. "Iris, it's normal for their fighting to happen," he said, as I shook my head. "It's not them, it's me. If it weren't for me moving in, the fight would've never happened. Haruhi gets overprotective when I'm around. Plus it'll just stir up more trouble for you all," I said, as a slight tear formed in my eye. I studied the stream again. "Maybe I should just keep jumping back to hotels. It'll be better for everyone," I said, as I started to cry a little. "Iris," Kazuna said, as he started to come closer, but I shook my head no. He sat back.

I rested my head on my knees. "Why does it hurt to pretend?" I cried aloud. Shifting was heard next to me. "What do you mean 'pretend'?" he said, as I jolted up. I turned to him, seeing him more worried. "Is there something that we should know?" he asked as I took a deep breath. I nodded. Kazuna turned to me. "Ok. You can tell me." I looked at him. "I don't know if I can. I've never told anyone before," I said, as he patted the seat next to him. "Come tell me. I can keep it a secret if you want me to," he said, as I stood and sat next to him on the bench. I looked at my hands as I tried to calm down even more. I took a deep breath then turned to him. "I was there when my mom died. I tried to call for help, but it was too late. By the time the ambulance came, she was gone." I stopped to look at my hands. "She had a heart attack and when I started for the phone, she would stop me from calling. She didn't even want me to be in the room with her when it happened. It was like she wanted to go and parts of me feel like she wanted me to kill her," I said, as I looked at him. His jaw hung wide open in shock. "I watched my mom die and ever since then I've been depressed. But I didn't want anyone to know, especially my brothers," I said, feeling tears flow right down my cheek.

Kazuna continued to stare at me in shock. I looked back to the river. "Sorry. I should've continued to keep it to myself," I said, as he shook his head. "No, no you shouldn't. Iris, that's stuff you need to tell. Do not ever keep something like that in," he said, but I cut him off. "But I didn't want anyone to think I'm a murderer for not doing anything about it. I always thought it was best to keep it a secret. Plus, you guy's don't need to have any distractions for work and if I told you all, it'll be one more thing to worry about," I explained. Kazuna huffed. "Well. I will keep it a secret if you want me to, but you need to tell Haruhi and Yuzuki at the least" he said, as I shook my head. "I can't tell them. I could never tell them." Kazuna grew a shocked expression. "Why? What's the worst thing that can happen?" he asked as I turned to him. "They wouldn't talk to me again. They'd be mad at me for murdering our mom." Kazuna huffed. "That's not considered murder, Iris," he said. I turned to him. "Then why does it feel like it is?" I asked, as my eyes started to water up again. Kazuna took a deep breath. "I have no clue. I've never been in that position before." I looked at the water again then put my head down. I hugged my knees harder as I stayed to myself. A hand started to rub against my back in comfort. " I don't think I can continue pretending to be ok," I said, knowing that my true feelings about the situation got out. "So don't hide it. It's ok to let us know how you feel. We would rather you tell us the truth, even if it's going to hurt," he said, as I turned to him. "You sure? You won't get annoyed by a depressed person?" I asked as he shook his head. "No," he said, as he chuckled. "We already deal with grumpy and that's probably worse," he said, as I slightly chuckled. "You're talking about Goushi I'm guessing," I said, as he nodded. "Exactly," he said, as I chuckled. "I'm not telling him you said that," I said, as he nodded. "Good. I don't want grumpy to kill me," he said, as footsteps came up from behind.

"I'm telling him you said that," Hikaru's voice echoed. We turned around to find him and Akane approaching. "Please don't. Moons need me," Kazuna said, as Hikaru chuckled. "I was kidding. Now why are you both out here?" he asked, as Akane stood behind me. "Is everything ok?" he asked me directly. I took a deep breath. "I think so. Just getting things off my chest." Akane knelt behind the bench. "Ok, we have time," he said, as I looked at Kazuna. "It might be one of those things where you feel better talking about it," he said, as I took a deep breath. I looked back behind to see Akane looking at me curiously. "I'm depressed," I explained as Hikaru cut in. "I knew there was something off," he said, as I looked behind at him. He cracked a smile. Akane got comfortable. "Alright. What makes you think that?" he asked, wanting to go deeper into the topic. I turned to Kazuna. "They'll understand," he said, calmly. I took a deep breath as I explained the story again. The more I talked about it, the less it made me feel better. When I was done explaining to Akane and Hikaru, I turned to face the water and stayed silent, keeping my eyes on my hands. The air fell silent. No one spoke or did anything after that. I covered my face as tears came down like a silent river. My chest formed a pain of regret and hatred for myself.

The movement was heard from behind me as arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer to the person behind. I cried harder. "Shh, it's going to be ok," Hikaru said, in my ear. I shook my head silently. "I can't fight it anymore," I said, as Hikaru hugged me more. "Let it all out," he said, calmly. Akane let out a chuckle. "Hikaru, did you want to tumble over the bench?" he asked as I broke out in a laugh. "What?" I asked as I turned to him. Akane chuckled again. "He's hugging you so much, he's practically falling over the bench," he said, as I turned to look. When I did, Hikaru almost tumbled over. I burst out in a mixture of crying and laughing. "Hikaru, don't hurt yourself," I said, between laughter. Hikaru caught himself on the bench as he pushed himself up, with help from Akane. I looked away and put my head down, trying to control my laughter. "Hikaru, you can't dance with a head wound," Kazuna joked. I started to cry again, due to my laughter. Kazuna turned to me. "Breath Iris. Between your laughter and tumble seed over there, we might need an ambulance," he joked. I took a deep breath. "Are you three always like this?" I asked, calming myself down. Kazuna turned to me. "Yeah, pretty much."

I took some deep breaths to control my laughter, then sighed. "Thank you, guys. I definitely needed this," I said, as I went to face the boys. "Anytime. It's good to see a lady laugh," Akane said, casually. I turned to him, confusion took over my mind. "Akane?" I said as he turned to me. "Yes?" he asked. I cocked my head in confusion. "Are you impersonating Kento?" I asked as he nodded. "Yes, I thought it would help," he said, as I looked at the water again. "OK. Well, it's getting late and my bodyguard of a brother is probably having a nervous breakdown right now," I said, as I stood. Kazuna turned to me. "You're talking about Haruhi, right?" he asked as I nodded. "Yep. He's practically my bodyguard," I said, with a stretch. Akane chuckled. "Your brother's love you," he said, as I huffed. "Yes, too much. Haruhi is pretty much turning into my mom," I said, as we started to head back. Akane turned to me. "I'm telling him you said that." I stopped to look at him. "Akane. Haruhi doesn't scare me. He's practically a teddy bear," I said, as he chuckled. "He scared you when we were down in the basement," he stated. I turned to him. "Ok, that scared me because it was unlike him. He's never got to the point where he wanted to punch someone," I explained. Hikaru chuckled. "Yuzuki scares you," he joked. I took a deep breath. "He's a marshmallow. Haruhi is a huggable teddy bear and Yuzuki is a huggable marshmallow," I said. The air went silent for a moment, except for the sound of our feet on cement. "Why is Yuzuki a marshmallow?" Kazuna asked. I chuckled. "I have no clue. I'm tired, alright?" I said as the boys chuckled. "Iris needs to hug her marshmallow," Hikaru joked. I sighed. "Iris needs sleep. It's a long day," I said, Akane chuckled. "Iris, you're going to fit right in with B-Project." I turned to him. "Why?" I asked. "Because you are just like your brothers," he said, as I sighed. "I'm nothing like my brothers. I'm the workaholic." Hikaru turned to him. "She's got a point there," he said, as I turned to him. I looked away and continued to walk in silence. "What?" he asked. I sighed. "I think you guys need the sleep more," I said, as we continued to walk back to the house.