What is life
But a loss
And what is loss
But a teaching moment
I am not a graceful loser
Despite the facades I've thrown up around myself
I do need help
To cope with a loss
So mother if you could console me instead of criticizing me
Pointing out everything that I do wrong
Every potential mistake that I make even though you don't care enough to be there yourself
I'd greatly appreciate it
I mean, I'd rather have support beams than be constantly torn down like a condemned building
With every syllable smashing into me like a wrecking ball
I lost, mom
Your "constructive criticism" only constructs an image of fears and doubts that only manifest to demolish me right before I do anything
You always say I never worked hard enough, when you never cared enough to see me hard at work
You jerk my self esteem out from under me
Confused when I clatter to the ground discarded among your other broken toys
I'm just your little boy ma
Why can't you comfort me like a mother's supposed to
Why is taking an L, more like taking the whole alphabet with you
Except, leave out the letter W
Because well someone like you isn't satisfied by my continual losses
I'm sorry I said I'd leave out the W
Because L someone like you isn't satisfied by my continual losses
When the W's gone, all that remains is an L
Maybe that's why whenever you ask me how I think I did at competitions
I say well
How school's going
Well
How my love life is
There is no I + U
Well it's an L
My whole life is a continuous chain of L's that keep me
Locked down, and laboring to live on
Learning to survive in a world where I cannot win
As if happiness is a sin, and I am a saint eagerly awaiting my next L
Right now the only thing I'm praying for is a victory
And well maybe that isn't such a bad thing
Every loss has become as much a part of me as a lesson
Leaving little less than listless lists of lightning like laughter
They come and go in a flash
I don't mean to be rash
But I'm so used to losing I'm starting to fear what would happen if I won
If like a two ton weight suddenly rose from my shoulders
And I was three thousand feet up in the air
Head in the clouds, four you to imagine that feeling
Five sleepless nights, six weary days, and seven dwarf star like amounts of pressure and heat
Would have to collapse on you for every moment since your conception
Perhaps I only remember the negatives in my life
But life in itself cannot begin without at least one L
And what is an L
But a loss
And what is a loss
But a teaching moment