SANAM'S POV

Happy days were these at my new home; and busy days too.Quite different from my past life of monotony and solitude.Perhaps marriage proved to be a blessing for me.All the sad feelings and gloomy associations were forgotten.There was life in every part of me.

The one week I had spent with my husband in umra(holy pilgrimage) was indescribably overwhelming.I had never felt more loved.And that's where I witnessed the spiritual side of Shiraz.When he cried his heart out in front of the creator, when he walked hand in hand with me during the tawaaf in hot sun, stopping after every few rounds for zamzam water.Every moment was undescribably beautiful .Each day, every minute I couldn't help falling more for him.With him I felt even closer to my Lord.With him came the missing optimism in my vision.

The blue sky and halcyon sunshine of the genial spring weather called me out into the garden ground.Amidst the sweet fragrances sat a familiar figure with his clenched hands resting on his knees and his eyes bent on the ground.My eyes erewhile fixed on the bushes were now irresistibly attracted to his dimples.Only six months into my marriage and I was growing very lenient to him.

It had formerly been my endeavour to study all sides of his character, to take the bad with the good to form an equitable judgement.Now I saw no flaws.He was more than perfect for me.I could fathom the strange depth in his eyes, sense the pain behind his smile.I had learnt to love him and every single captivating feature of his.

Within a jiffy, he sensed my eyes on him.I smiled at him and he smirked.

" Iam nervous, " he confessed.

" Don't be! We've gave our best.InshaAllah we will get residency in the best medical school.Allah says:"

Surah Hud, Verse 115:

وَاصْبِرْ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لَا يُضِيعُ أَجْرَ الْمُحْسِنِينَ

And be patient, for surely Allah does not waste the reward of the good-doers.

"InshaAllah! I hope I'd get the residency in general surgery.I have grown fond of operations during my under graduation days."

I squeezed his hand assuringly.He let out a sigh of relief.While he mused on his future, I played around with a pair of white rabbits.The only animals that didn't scare the crap out of me.

Though we had a lot of work during our house job, we studied pretty much for the postgraduation entrance exam.The online tutorials were a great aid.While studying medicine, I had decided that I would like to become a paediatrician or a gynaecologist.With the rank I secured in the entrance test I was hopeful of getting accepted in a good medical school for my specialisation.

"You like rabbits? " He asked, caressing the white pet.

"Yeah I do like them now! Though I was pretty much scared to even touch them initially." He grinned at my reply.Despite being an animal lover he didn't keep any as I was not very fond of pets.

"It's the same with humans.You will never know a person until you really want to."

"You know what Qur'an says?"

Surah Al-Hajj, Verse 46:

أَفَلَمْ يَسِيرُوا فِي الْأَرْضِ فَتَكُونَ لَهُمْ قُلُوبٌ يَعْقِلُونَ بِهَا أَوْ آذَانٌ يَسْمَعُونَ بِهَا فَإِنَّهَا لَا تَعْمَى الْأَبْصَارُ وَلَٰكِن تَعْمَى الْقُلُوبُ الَّتِي فِي الصُّدُورِ

Have they not travelled in the land so that they should have hearts with which to understand, or ears with which to hear? For surely it is not the eyes that are blind, but blind are the hearts which are in the breasts.

"SubhanAllah!Very true, " I replied.

"Do you love me?" He asked with a wierd glint in his eyes.

Before I could confess the feelings that I harboured towards him, the sound of approaching wheels interrupted us.The arrival of his dad marked an abrupt end to our conversation.

"Assalamualaikum dad! Pleasant surprise!Wasnt expecting you before lunch," Shiraz exclaimed, as he stood up to show respect.

"Walaikumsalam son! Hhuhh I was  feeling a bit tired.Besides my manager had cancelled few appointments with some old clients," he replied.

"Let us catch up on life.I have a feeling that it will make you much better," Shiraz grinned.

I brushed my clothes and adjusted my head cover.When his dad smiled at me with tired eyes, I gave him a salaam and walked in.It was rare for the father-son duo to spend time together due to their busy lives.And I didn't wanted to be an intruder.After all, parents have much more rights on their son than his wife.Who would know the value of a father more than me.

"Salaam guys! I am going to an art exhibition with my friends, " Aunt Heena said.Uncle Khidr looked at her in appreciation.She was dressed in her best as usual.Her creamy complexion complemented her grey eyes.We could say age did no damage to her beauty.

"Salaam! Carry on Heena.Iam gonna spend some quality time with my son," Uncle Khidr replied.She gave me a smile and exited.Though I have tried being extra nice to her there was something which kept her from accepting me completely.But I never gave up.And I will never give up till she starts loving me like a daughter.Stubborness was my biggest problem but here it proved to be my strength.

Knowing how tired he was,I prepared banana smoothie for Uncle Khidr.He was watching cricket with Shiraz by his side when I walked into the living room.He caressed his white beard and chuckled as his team hit a boundary.

"Jazakallah khair daughter! You're spoiling me with so much care," Uncle Khidr said, taking the chilled glass into his hands.I smiled in reply.

"Hey! Where is my milkshake?" Shiraz asked in a child like manner.

"You are not so lucky! " I replied with an evil grin.I had thought of making some of his favourite food for lunch.I didn't wanted to reveal it to him that moment.

As I proceeded to the kitchen to prepare lunch,my phone rang.It was mom.I answered and advanced towards the counter where all the veggies were kept.Taking the cutting board and a knife I started chopping for the Russian salad.

"Assalamualaikum mom! How are you doing?"

"Walaikumsalam! Iam doing fine dear.Alhamdulillah."

Her voice brought me into tears.I had never imagined being away from her let alone not seeing her for two whole months.It was the preparation for the medical entrance which prevented me from visiting mom.

"Hey! You shouldn't cry.I know you miss me but you'll have to be patient.InshaAllah when your  result and allotment letter comes I will be the first one to come to you." From her feeble voice I could make out that she was crying too.

"Is there any good news for me? Am I going to be a granny any time soon?" She asked trying to change the subject of our conversation.I wiped away my tears with the hem of my sleeve and my mind wandered to her query.Too embarrassed by her question I accidentally cut my finger.And it pained.Really bad.I moaned and released the knife from my grip.

"Sanam you there?" Mom was still on the phone.I cut the call without even answering her back.

"Oh my God! Your finger is bleeding, " Shiraz said, grasping my bleeding finger.I didn't know when he had entered the kitchen.He pushed me towards the basin and washed my bleeding finger in running water.

"How many times do I tell you to take help from the cooks?" He scolded, wrapping a guaze bandage around the injured part.When I didn't utter a word he looked at me in concern.

"Is it still paining?"

I nodded in negative.He took my bandaged finger and kissed it gently.

"You look cute when you're angry, " I teased.

"Oh please! Guys shouldn't be called cute.That's a girly term."

My phone rang again and this time Shiraz answered it.

"Salaam Aunt Huma.How are you? " He walked me to the leaving room and made me sit on the couch.

"Yeah she's fine.Just a little stubborn.Though I tell her not to cook she ignores it and slips into the kitchen to make my food."

He chuckled and looked longingly at me.Perhaps it was because of mom's reply to his complaint.During the phone call he passed me a pain killer and water.I refused and kept it aside.I could handle that much pain.I had been through worse.

"Here! Your mom wants to speak to you," he said, placing the phone to my ears.

"Salaam mom! So sorry.I had cut the call abruptly."

"It's fine darling.What was Shiraz talking about?"

"Ah! Nothing mom.How is Shaila's preparation for exams?" I enquired, dismissing her question.

Meanwhile Shiraz came back with a copy of Qur'an and started reading silently.

"Sanam are you happy with your husband?" Mom asked,diverting the topic of our discussion.I smiled at Shiraz who glanced at me that very moment.Had mom been here she'd be overwhelmed with joy to see me smiling so much.

"Uhh..To be honest, I'm more than happy mom.Alhamdulillah for everything !Allah has blessed me with a wonderful husband."
I could sense my mom smiling at the other end.

"Sometime back I had lost my trust in love and marriage due to a few unfortunate events.But Shiraz has helped me revive my broken heart.He had filled it with Allah's love and Almighty created a special place for Shiraz in my heart."

"Alhamdulillah! Glad to hear that from you. I pray that Allah blesses your marriage and he keeps you together happy forever." I whispered an ameen.

"And you shouldnt forget to remind him everyday that you love him." She ended the call with a grin.Her words echoed in my heart.Though I had reciprocated his love I never told him verbally. how much I liked him.Perhaps I was shy to admit it.But mom says feelings specifically that of love shouldn't be hidden.

"Oh my Allah! What happened to your finger? " Masarrath asked,squinting her eyes.

"Don't tell me you were cooking again," Masarrath laughed,throwing her bag carelessly and landing herself beside me.When Shiraz coughed to seek her attention, she passed me a look of sympathy and loosened her hijab.

"What about your seat allotments?" She asked,walking towards the kitchen, probably to grab a pack of her favourite chips.We exchanged looks and he yelled at the driver to get his car out of the garage.Masarrath looked at us with amusement as I ran to fetch my abaya and Shiraz went to change his clothes.
There was no time for lunch so we grabbed some sandwiches on our way.

****

Minutes ticked into longing hours.Wish they had given our results online.Waiting at the counselling centre was a thing of patience.I felt alone in the large hall while Shiraz was in the adjacent one.Finally when it came to my turn,I was happy and curious at the same time.But in some corner of my mind,I was anxious and worried too.It was a turning point in our lives.The beginning of our bright future inshaAllah.When my name flashed across the computer screen in front of me, I was at loss of words.Tears of happiness welled up in my eyes.My prayers were answered.

When I walked out with my allotment letter my eyes started searching for him.He had just exited his hall and on spotting me he ran towards the door where I stood.When my name flashed on the big screens he hugged me with happiness.

"MashaAllah! Congratulations! A gynaecology seat in the best medical school," Shiraz beamed.

"Alhamdulillah!" I uttered as we walked out of the huge building.

"What about you? Where did you get selected? " I asked, remembering that he was also there for his allotment.

"I will talk about it later.Don't want to spoil your happiness. "

I stopped near our car and made him turn towards me.

"Do you think I will be happy knowing that something is bothering you.Don't you think your happiness is my happiness now?" I asked, looking into his eyes which were sad.Taking the letter from his hands, I read it aloud.He moved his face to the side.I could see him masking his emotions.

"I know this is not what you wanted.But this is what Allah wants you to be.Sometimes it is difficult to accept his plans for us but we need to remember that our wisdom can never match his level." He let out a sad sigh and I tightened my grip on his hands.

"If you are not going to accept pediatrics residency then even I wont report for mine." My voice became raspy and I was on the verge of crying. A wave of guilt passed over his face and he lifted my chin to face him.

"You love me so much that you are ready to give away your dreams for my stupid decision?" He asked, looking deep into my eyes.

"I love you much more.Your wishes matter more than my dreams.Wallahi, if I had to choose between your happiness and mine, I did choose yours." He stared at me intently and a blush crept on my face.I had confessed my feelings at such a wierd hour.

"Is it just me or Allah has been kinder to any other being on earth?" He smiled,opening the car door for me.

"There's one more person on this earth who thinks she is more blessed." He gave me his signature smile and started the engine.

We drove past skyscrapers and busy streets but nothing fascinated me.There was some metallic taste and sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach.It was happening since yesterday.And my period was late.I attributed the delay to stress.I tried to listen to the Qur'an recitation which was playing in the car but I couldn't.

"Stop the car! I think I am gonna throw up."

Shiraz looked at me with worried eyes.Before he could ask any questions I puked up all my lunch.

"You okay?" He asked, passing me a water bottle.

"Yeah! Iam fine."

"But you don't look like.I think you need to see a doctor, " he suggested.

" Please! It's just a single episode of vomiting.Besides Iam also a doctor, " I replied, wiping my face with a tissue.

"But I am not listening to you in this matter."

-----

He drove me to Dr.Alaina's clinic.She was Professor Ahmer's neice.A young physician who also had a diploma in obstetrics.The familiar smell of hospital greeted us in the lobby.Though I was used to it today I found it unpleasant.I scrunched my nose in disgust and swallowed a peppermint.

We didn't take any appointment prior but the receptionist let us in as he knew Shiraz already.

"Assalamualaikum! Pleasure to see you young couple," Dr.Alaina greeted

"Walaikumsalam! I have thought of meeting you but not like this," I replied.

"Well! We were destined to meet like this," she laughed.

Taking me into her examination chamber she took a detailed history. After checking my vitals she conducted few blood tests.She made me do the home pregnancy too.When I failed to accept that it was positive Dr.Alaina took me to the ultrasound room.I was dazed.But from what I saw on the screen it was all clear.

"Congratulations Sanam!Your bundle of joy,Junior Shiraz is on the way," she revealed,a huge smile painting her face.

Shiraz looked at me elated and tears of happiness rolled down his face.

*********

A / N
Assalamualaikum guys!
Belated eid mubarak to you all.
This chappy is an eid gift from me :D

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