We drive for two hours and it is the most comfortable drive in my life. The squishy leather arm chairs swivel around 180 degrees. I turned mine inwards to Nik's and tucked my feet in beside his legs. Every so often he would trace patterns on my ankles and I couldn't stop myself from smiling up at him. The incident back in the bedroom left me feeling like a hormone enraged teenager. I suppose I am a hormone enraged teenager.

I have to remind myself several times how bad of an idea it is to be more than friends with Nik. But it feels pointless to try to fight the fact that we are attracted to each other. I try to convince myself that it would be okay to have the type of relationship Jennie and Chase have but Nik and I have never been good at 'casual'. With us, we are all in. All in and perfectly happy or all in and going down in flames.

We pull into our campsite, after circling the entire park twice, and join the rest of our group. It appears my new friends have been anxiously awaiting this day for a long time. The RV and this camping trip have been a topic of discussion for them for weeks now. It almost makes me feel like I am intruding but I am here now, so it's not like I can back out.

"Are we all sleeping in here?" Jennie asks from her spot, perched on Chase's lap.

"No." Everyone but Bev, Clare, Jordan, and me chime in response. There is no need to ask for a further explanation. After hearing about the thrupple staying up all night, hooking up together at Nik's party, I think we all know exactly who won't be sleeping in the RV.

"I brought my tent trailer." Jordan gestures out the window, and I can see a much smaller camper hooked up to Nik's truck.

"Steer clear of that thing tonight." Nik says as he plops down beside me and brings his arm to rest on the top of the couch. I see Jennie raise her eyebrow at me. I know she is considering this action to mean that Nik has his arm around me. I try not to think of it that way.

"Noted." I laugh.

"We aren't going to hang out in here the whole trip, are we?" Jessica pipes up as she jumps to her feet. The sound of her voice is still unfamiliar to me; she is so quiet. "Come on Cal. I will show you how to build a proper fire."

Suddenly everyone is on their feet and we begin to set up the campsite. The site itself is large, but most of the space is occupied by the RV. Chase re-parks it twice to give us as much room as possible. When he is happy with the position, he releases the slide out and the living area inside the RV doubles in size. Next he cranks out the awning and we have a covered area to protect us from the rain.

The storage compartments on the outside of the RV are brimming with supplies. Folding chairs, a card table, a set of horseshoes, a badminton set, an expensive-looking table top bbq, an outdoor area rug, a collapsible shoe rack and several canisters of propane.

Jennie and I lay out the area rug underneath the awning and set up a table and chairs. Jessica and Cal get a fire going in the stone fire pit while Bev, Clare and Jordan set up their tent trailer. Hayden struggles with the badminton set for a few minutes before giving up and hammering the horseshoe stakes into the ground instead. Chase and Nik come out of the RV, each carrying a large cooler filled with beverages.

Within forty-five minutes, our campsite is complete and we all relax into chairs around the fire. The smoky aroma of the burning wood brings back memories of another camping trip, years ago with Becca and her family. I smile at the memory but my heart aches, missing my best friend.

"You good?" Jennie nudges me and hands me a can of Twisted Tea. We decided not to bring any tequila with us because we don't want to spend the entire weekend wasted or hungover.

"Fine." I smile at her and take the can.

"We need more firewood." Hayden states as he tosses the last few pieces into the fire, sending an explosion of embers into the darkening sky.

Nobody jumps into action. I take the initiative and rise from my chair I don't mind collecting firewood. "Don't let her wander into the woods by herself, Nik." Clare demands and throws a stick at him.

There is probably nothing hiding, waiting to attack, in the sparse woods surrounding our campsite, but I am grateful Clare suggests he joins me. After what happened back in the bedroom, I feel the need to put some emphasis back on the whole 'just friends' thing.

We aren't two steps into the woods and Nik pushes me playfully into a low hanging tree branch. I swat at him and attempt to push him over, but he is like a brick wall. This is what we do. We tease and flirt with each other; I don't think there was ever a time in our relationship when we weren't like this. So how am I supposed to draw the line now when it has always been blurry?

"I can't believe this is what you guys consider camping." I laugh and collect the biggest and driest branches I can find. "I was expecting to be sleeping in a tent on the ground."

"It's a bit much I know." Nik replies sheepishly. "Wait until you see the boat tomorrow."

"I'm looking forward to that. I haven't been out on a boat since I was a little kid. I'm glad you invited me Nik."

"To be honest, I didn't think you would want to come." He stoops to grab a large section of a fallen tree and easily throws it on top of his shoulder.

"Why not?" I look to him in confusion.

"You have sort of been all over the place since we have reconnected Haven. Running away, yelling at me, running away, texting me to hang out, slamming my truck door..." he ticks every incident off on his fingers as his smirk grows wider and wider.

"Okay, I get it."

He barks out a laugh. "I am glad you're here. As long as you don't change your mind about being friends... again," he over emphasises the word, "I want to spend as much time with you as I can. It's nice to know this you."

My heart flutters and I feel my cheeks go pink. There is something tugging at the back of my mind, something I was supposed to be doing while we search for firewood but I can't seem to remember. I am too overjoyed at Nik's thoughtful words to even care.

"I am only this version of myself because of you." I whisper. I'm not sure why I feel so shy about admitting it to him. Maybe because, when you think about it, it is kinda terrible. The only reason I am the kind, caring, and compassionate person I am today is because I am terrified of repeating the past. The last thing I would ever want to do is watch somebody crumble the way he did. "You being ripped from my life changed me Nik."

I can't meet his eyes but I can feel him staring at me. There is more I want to say, but I am not sure this is the best time. Without looking directly at him, I flash a smile in his direction. "Do you think this is enough wood?" I don't wait for an answer and begin picking my way carefully over the fallen brush and head back to our campsite. 

The next morning, I wake up to the smell of bacon and eggs. I climb out of the bunk-bed Chase assigned me to and follow the smell out into the kitchen. Nik is standing in front of the stove, barefoot, wearing pajama bottoms and no shirt. He doesn't notice me at first but when he turns and sees me leaning against the wall, a smile crosses his sleepy face.

"Good morning." He greets me in a tired voice.

"Morning." I respond as I jump up to sit on the counter beside him. "Is this for me?" I tease as I snag a piece of scrambled egg from the frying pan. He gives me a dirty look, but I can see the smile hiding behind it.

"Is that your way of asking if I can make you breakfast?" his eyebrows raise. I feel like Nik making me breakfast would cross a line somehow. Therefore, I take an orange from the bowl on the counter and toss it in the air.

"No, I'm fine with this." I hop off the counter and slide into one booth at the dining table. As he finishes cooking, I roll and peel my orange. Nik's plate clanks on the table as he settles in across from me. I offer a small smile and we eat together in relative silence.

The plan for today is to go out on Chase's dad's boat but it seems it will be a slow start to the day. I can hear Hayden snoring from one of the bunk beds, and Jennie is locked up in the bedroom with Chase. Cal and Jessica have the curtain drawn in front of the double bed they shared. I don't even want to think about what was going on in the tent trailer.

"Do you think they will wake up anytime soon?" I question Nik as he rinses off his plate.

"If we wake them up, yeah." He replies mischievously.

"What do you have in mind?" I whisper and he beckons me forward. As silently as I can, I creep towards Nik to see what he is pointing at. I'm not sure why I try to be quiet, considering we are about to wake everyone up. But I do it anyway and watch as Nik points to an intricate set of dials embedded into the wall by the door of the RV.

I quickly realize that some of these dials control the central sound system, which has speakers throughout the entire RV. He looks to me for approval; I nod and put my hand over my mouth to stifle my laughter. When he presses the power button on the quietest buzzing noise fills the room. I click a button to change the setting to the radio and cover my ears. With a flick of his wrist, Nik cranks the volume dial to full blast and the entire RV fills with the blaring sounds of a country song.

We are both laughing but I can't hear it, Nik has his hands over his ears too. From the bunk-bed area I see a bundle of blankets plummet to the ground. Tangled in the bedspread is Hayden, he emerges from the mass of blankets looks alarmed. Nik quickly turns the volume dial back down, as Cal clumsily pulls the curtain back that covers the double bed.

"What the fuck dude!" Cal rubs his eyes in confusion. Chase and Jennie appear from the bedroom at the back, both of them look pissed off.

"Morning!" I greet everyone cheerfully, the response is several tired, irritated stares boring into me. "Who is excited to go out on the boat?"

It doesn't take long for everyone to forgive Nik and I for the prank, most likely because I am nice enough to cook everyone breakfast. It takes three batches of pancakes to satisfy the appetites of the boys. I feel queasy watching them endlessly stuff their faces with pancakes.

After breakfast Jennie and I lock ourselves in the small bathroom and try on multiple bathing suits. To our surprise, we own the same bathing suit expect hers is black and mine is pink. It is a tiny one piece with cutouts on the side, stomach, and back. We take it as a sign that we have to wear them. Jennie works magic on my hair, french braiding it into pigtails and then expertly works her fingers through her own hair creating the same look. Our look is complete when we pull on the tiniest short shorts we own and strappy flip flops. I am not usually confident in a bathing suit, but as I look in the mirror with Jennie; I feel sexy.

"Come on! You two are taking longer the Bev and the girls did, that's saying something!" Chase barks as he pounds on the bathroom door. Jennie wrenches it open and glares at him. The irritation falls from his face the instant his eyes land on her. I watch as his eyes rake up and down her body. "My bad," he chokes out, "totally worth the wait."

"You ruined our grand entrance." Jennie complains. Irritated, she gathers up her belongings from the bathroom and pushes past Chase to deposit them in the bedroom. He follows her like a lost puppy. That leaves me to exit the bathroom alone, and suddenly without Jennie by my side I no longer feel sexy, I feel exposed.

With a deep breath, I walk casually out into the living area and am half relieved, half disappointed to find it completely empty. Jennie and Chase emerge from the bedroom hand in hand. "Good, he hasn't seen you yet." She breathes. "I don't want to miss the look on his face."

"Jennie." I hiss under my breath and eye Chase, hinting for her not to speak like that in front of him.

"Oh please," she waves her hand dismissively, "you think he doesn't know that you and Nik are all about each other? Trust me, baby. I hear it all from you and he hears it all from him."

"Jennie!" Chase complains in disbelief. "I don't tell you anything he tells me."

"Ha," she laughs and plants a kiss on his cheek, "that's what you think. Some things a man finds irrelevant, a woman finds significant."

Chase and I shrug together, apparently neither of us knew this information. Jennie leads the way to the door of the RV, then pauses and holds her hand out to me, "Wait like thirty seconds, I want to make sure I am in a good position to see his face."

"No way!" I argue, "Your not turning this into some stupid romantic..."

"Don't ruin this for me, Haven!" Jennie stomps her foot and gives me a pleading look.

"You are just like Becca." I roll my eyes in defeat and step back from the door and allow Jennie and Chase to slip out before me. I debate grabbing a sweatshirt to cover my body but I know Jennie will flip out. My eyes wander down my body one last time, assessing just how much skin and cleavage I am showing. I take a deep breath and push the door open.