My memories haunt my dreams that night and when I wake up dark circles have settled in around my eyes. Sweaty blonde hair is pasted to the back of my neck as I make my way to the bathroom to wash off the ghosts of my past. As I shower, I work on tightly locking up the memories back into the recesses of my mind. I step out of the shower into the steam-filled bathroom leaving behind the bad energy.

Today will be a good day because I am spending it job shadowing Jennie. The only good thing about the previous night was the fact that Jennie had texted me to let me know we were a go for today. I am excited to spend the day learning new things, and I will have something positive to tell Becca when I call her later tonight.

I dig through my closet to find the perfect outfit for today. Jennie informed me I should dress "business casual". When I replied with a series of question marks, she began sending me screenshots of appropriate work wear. Luckily, I brought a few blazers and one pair of dress pants with me to Vancouver. I pull on the dress pants and try on three different tops before deciding on a loose fitting floral one. I snap a picture of myself in the mirror and send it to Jennie for approval.

My stomach grumbles as I make my way into the kitchen with my blazer thrown over my arm. "Good morning." Dolores greets me as she pours herself a cup of coffee.

"Good morning." I chirp back.

"Jennie told me you're going to work in her office today. You must be so excited." Dolores flashes me a genuine smile. I think she knows how disappointed I have been feeling about my lack of enlightenment since arriving in Vancouver. We haven't spoken about it, but Dolores is a very intuitive woman.

"I am excited, nervous too. I don't want to mess anything up and embarrass myself." I grab my reusable Starbucks thermos from the cupboard and take the pot of coffee from Dolores.

"Making mistakes is the best way to learn!" Dolores says cheerily before leaving me alone in the kitchen with a smirk on my face. Little does she know, I have made my fair share of mistakes and I certainly learned from them. 

"This is the copy room; it's where we make copies." Jennie laughs at her own joke as she leads me into a small room just behind the reception area.

"Really, I never would have thought." I reply sarcastically.

There was not the slightest linger of bad energy once I was in Jennie's presence. She had picked me up from the Hutchs condo and spent the entire drive to the office gushing about how excited she was to show me around and introduce me to everybody she worked with. It relieved me to find there was no room for negative emotion because Jennie's positivity filled the space around her.

"By lunch we will have a stack of paperwork to scan into the electronic document system, so we will get to use these bad boys later." Jennie taps the gigantic machine playfully and begins opening the cupboard doors naming off the supplies stored in each.

"Do you have a favorite pen?" she questions me as she pulls open a deep drawer filled with boxes upon boxes of pens. My eyes light up, I wouldn't say I have a favorite, but there is nothing like writing with a smooth inky pen.

"I wouldn't say..." the phone rings and Jennie hurries from the copy room to answer it. I snag two pens from the drawer before bumping it shut with my hip.

I watch as Jennie sits with perfect posture in her squishy computer chair and twirls the phone cord around her finger. Her tone of voice is completely different as she speaks to the person on the other end of the call. She replaces the bubbly valley girl tone with a smooth, mature professional one.

"Please hold, and I will transfer you to Mr. Tanner." Jennie beckons me with a finger and points to the phone which has a large touch screen and several multi colored buttons. She taps the screen where it says TRANSFER, a list of names appears on the screen, she taps TANNER and then presses a large green button with no label.

"We get about a million phone calls a day and 99% of them just need to be transferred to a certain accountant. The phone system is very straightforward; Just be sure you tap the right name before you hit the green button. Got it?"

I nod and she leaves me at the desk alone while she gets me a chair. My hands tap nervously on the desk in front of me as I wait for her to return. The desk faces a small waiting area with uncomfortable looking plastic chairs and a small table with well-used magazines lined neatly on top of it. The main door to the office is just to the left of the desk, when it opens and a well-dressed older man approaches the desk I panic.

"Good morning." He greets me and places his briefcase on the floor. "I'm here to see Jones." He digs around in his pockets, trying to find something as I stand unmoving, hoping Jennie will return. "Ahh ha." The man retrieves his wallet from inside his suit jacket, pulls a battered card out of it and hands the card to me.

I smile and take the card from him with a shaking hand. I'm not sure why I am so nervous. I suppose I just want to make a good impression on the man.

"Peter!" I hear Jennie's excited voice from behind me and relief washes over me. She rolls a chair behind the desk and indicates for me to sit as she settles into her own chair. "Perfect, you found your client card! Where did you leave it this time?" Jennie takes the small card from me and types a username and password into the computer.

"It was in my raincoat pocket, just like you suggested it would be." A blush comes to Peters' face and I get the feeling he adores Jennie.

We dive into the process of checking in a client and Peter talks casually about what has been going on in his life since he last saw Jennie. I laugh when she laughs and do my best to pay attention to what she is doing on the screen as we listen to Peter ramble on. Jennie points to the screen to show me that Mr. Jones has received an electronic notification that Peter has arrived. Within a minute, a bald man rounds the corner and takes Peter into the back section of the office.

"It's as easy as that!" Jennie exclaims. "So what do you think? Is this all you dreamed it would be?" She widens her arms, gesturing at the expansive desk before us.

"Oh, everything and more!" I swoon.

We spend the rest of the morning going over typical procedures for answering the phone, receiving clients and scheduling appointments. The work isn't difficult;It's mostly fun because I get to hang out with Jennie but I know this isn't the job for me. For one thing, I hate talking on the phone and Jennie wasn't lying when she said the phone rings a million times a day. She also wasn't lying when she said we would have a stack of scanning to do by lunch time. When I look at the growing stack with panic, Jennie reassures me we can get it all done after lunch.

Jennie and I buy Chinese food for lunch in the food court on the main floor of the building. Two of her coworkers join us, they are friendly enough, but I get uncomfortable when they question me about my schooling. What university do you go to, what classes have you taken, what are you going to major in? I didn't feel uncomfortable all day, until that moment.

How do you explain to complete strangers that you nearly flunked out of your first year of university, you are enrolled in a 'General Studies' program, and had no clue what you are going to major in? It all sounds so pathetic when I think about it, saying it out loud is positively dreadful.

Luckily, they are all very encouraging. Suzan, who is about 50 years old and visibly in better shape than me, tells me that she changed her major three times before she finally decided on becoming an accountant. By the time we make our way back up to the office I feel like maybe it's okay that I can't figure out what to do with my life yet.

I spend my afternoon at the large copy machine, scanning and coding paperwork before running it through the shredder. It is tedious, but at least there is a small radio on the counter so I have music to keep me distracted. When she isn't welcoming clients or on the phone, Jennie leans against the doorway and we chit chat about the most random stuff.

"Oh by the way," Jennie coos "I totally ran into Nik's friend the other day."

It's the first time I have heard his name all day, and it throws me for a loop. This is the longest I have gone without thinking about him since I ran into him on the beach that day. My body goes tense, which does not go unnoticed by Jennie.

"Uh oh, I knew there was something wrong. You have been avoiding talking about him all day. What happened?" Jennie glances back at the reception desk to make sure no clients are sitting in the waiting area. Her gaze falls directly on me and I know she wants to hear every detail.

"I don't want to talk about him. Where did you run into Chase?" I try to sound excited for her, only because I know how attractive she thinks he was.

"Funnily enough it was in the parkade downstairs. He works in this building." Jennie goes on about exactly how they bumped into each other, what he smelled like (Gucci cologne and gasoline), what he said, what she said. Every single detail.

"He invited me to a party on Friday night. Do you want to go?"

I snap my head up so fast I feel my neck kink from the movement. My hand flies up to massage my neck and Jennie bursts into laughter. I stick my tongue out at her and she does it back to me.

"I'm going to report this as a workplace injury," I mumble grumpily. She laughs in response and dashes from the room when the phone rings.

So Chase invited Jennie to a party. I consider how fun it could be to party with Jennie and Chase, I could learn a lot about Nik. But then it clicks, if Chase is going, then Nik would probably go too. My heart sinks and I know that I should tell Jennie that I can't go. She will totally understand and besides I don't need to be a third wheel. I would find something else to do on Friday night, something to keep me distracted from the fact that I could see Nik if I wanted to.

"Anyway, back to the party on Friday. Do you want to go?"