Thud. Thud. Thud-thud-thud-thud-thud.

I jolt awake at the sound and I take a moment to realize where I am; the walls of the RV offer me a quick reminder. The sound that woke me is somebody banging on the door relentlessly. From beside me I hear a groan and I remember I am not alone.

"I've got it." I mumble to Nik but he is faster, jumping up and unlocking the door before flopping back down on the bed. He locks his arms around me and pulls me close to his chest, my breath catches in surprise, but I settle into his embrace.

"How cozy." A short voice comes from the doorway. I glance up and see Hayden leaning against the frame looking irritated. "Are you two going to stay in here all night? Everyone has been up for an hour, we're going to play a drinking game around the fire."

Nik squeezes me tighter against him and retorts something back, but I lose his words as he nuzzles into my neck. The feeling of his breath on me sends an explosion of goosebumps over my skin. Why hadn't he been holding me like this while we slept? Oh right, because we are 'just friends.' I think we need to change that, this feels too good.

"Well, if you're not going to get up, can I take your truck to go buy firewood from that store down the road?"

"I'll go." Nik lifts his head. "Now go away!"

"Whatever dude." Hayden closes the door a little too hard.

"What's wrong with him?" I ask without moving. There is no way I will be the one who breaks this embrace.

"He's just pissy cause everyone is all coupled up out here." his tone is casual, but the minute he finishes speaking his body tenses. "I don't mean that we are..."

"It's fine, Nik." I press my back into his chest, reiterating the fact that I am not bothered by his comment. "He didn't have anyone to invite?" I question as he adjusts his arms around me, holding me tighter.

"No, him and his girl broke up a few weeks ago. Good thing to, none of us liked her. She treated him like shit." Now it's my turn to tense up. There is nothing wrong with what he said, but it brings back the memories. The mere mention of a girl treating a guy like shit fills with remorse.

"Damn," Nik sighs. "I just keep saying the wrong thing, don't I?"

"No," I breathe and turn in his arms so we are face to face, settling my hands on his hard chest. "The past is the past." His brown eyes search mine and I can feel his heart race under my palms. I remember how he used to show me the effect I had on him. How easy it was to make his heart race if he just thought about me.

"Come on," he sighs, and brushes the hair that has escaped from my braids away from my face. "Before Hayden comes back to bang on the door again."

The last thing I want is for his arms to leave from around me, but that's exactly what happens. It leaves me feeling cold and empty. His weight shifts off the bed and I know our moment of intimacy is over. I hate it but I rise from the bed and follow him out the door.

"I'll meet you out there." He says, as he slips into the bathroom.

When I emerge from the RV, I am greeted by the cool night air. The sun has dipped below the trees and the heat from the day has dissipated. I cross our campsite to join the others by the campfire, but Hayden intercepts me, gripping my arm and pulling me towards the truck. I allow him to guide me only because he catches me off guard.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" he questions me with a hard stare. I stare back, because I do not understand what he is talking about. Leaning against the truck, I raise my eyebrow at him asking for further explanation. "With Nik," he clarifies in a hushed tone, as he speaks he leans in closer to me putting his arm on the truck, completely blocking our conversation from the others.

"What are you talking about? We are just friends." I don't bother trying to keep my voice down.

"That didn't look like just friends." I open my mouth to tell him that it really isn't any of his damn business, but he quickly continues, "I worry about him with you. You don't know what he was like Haven. He was..."

"What the fuck?"

I lean my head around Hayden and see Nik standing just outside the RV, his murderous glare on Hayden and me. I know right away what the problem is; we are standing awfully close. Me leaning against the truck, Hayden leaning into me as he talks in a quiet voice. From the outside looking in, we appear intimate.

"Nik," I step around Hayden and move towards him but he marches past me, keys in hand.

"Don't Haven." Hayden reaches out to grab my arm but I yank it away and shoot him a dangerous glare. I don't care if he is just trying to look out for his friend, he is not going to stop me from setting things straight with Nik.

"I'm coming with you." I say as he wrenches the driver's side door open, climbs inside and slams the door shut. Rushing around to the other side of the truck, I join him in the cab and feel thick, heavy waves of tension rolling off of him.

Nik reverses out of the campsite, the tires sliding on the loose dirt and grass. I can see the others staring at us, before he throws it in drive and stomps on the gas. Gravel and dust kick up behind the truck, and the back end kicks out but Nik expertly gains control of the vehicle.

"What are you doing?" Nik accuses me. "I tell you Hayden just broke up with his girl so you move in on him?"

"It is not like that Nik. I would never do that to you."

"What, make a move on one of my best friends? It wouldn't be the first time."

Ouch. That cuts deep. This is the first time that he has been the one to bring up the past, usually he avoids it all at costs. But, he is right. It wouldn't be the first time I did something like that. However, if he thinks I would do something like that now, then he doesn't know me at all.

"We were just talking, talking about you!" I say in a rushed voice. "The second I stepped out of the RV he grabbed me and pulled me aside and then he..."

"What was he saying about me?" Nik cuts me off suspiciously as he drifts wildly around a corner. I grip the door for support.

"Stop driving like a maniac!" I protest, Nik's eyes flash to mine and he must see that he is scaring me because he eases off the gas instantly. "He is worrying about you, because of me." I admit.

He shakes his head, and grips the steering wheel until his knuckles turn white. "That's not what it looked like." We turn into a small empty parking lot designated for the campground office and store, a dull wooden building advertising: ICE CREAM. FIRE WOOD. WATER TOY RENTALS. The moment the truck comes to a stop, he slams it into park and glares at me.

"Listen to me," I plead and reach for his hand, but he pulls away. My heart breaks and not because he pulled away from me, but because I now know that despite how hard Nik tries to act like the past is behind him, it's clearly not.

Something as small as me looking overly friendly with another guy has sent him spiraling. This realization should make me completely forbid my earlier thoughts of becoming more with Nik. But it doesn't. More than anything it makes me want to show him that all I want is him. There isn't anyone else in this world that I want more than him and it's about time he knows it.

"I don't want Hayden," I state finitely.

I reach for him again, and this time he doesn't pull away. The heavy rising and falling of his chest has slowed, but the mixture of emotion hasn't faded from his eyes. Anger, pain, and fear. As I intertwine our fingers, I watch the severity of those emotions fall away from his face. The pinched look in his eyes and the set to his jaw disappears until finally he just looks confused and worn out.

"I didn't mean to overreact Haven, but that sent me back to a place I rarely let myself think about."

"I get it," I whisper. "I know you said you put the past behind you, but I didn't believe it for a second. Maybe you don't keep it in front of you, to protect you from being that person again like I do, but I knew that somewhere inside of you all of that shit still existed. But you need to know that I am different Nik. I would never hurt you."

"Don't Haven, don't treat me like I am some fragile, broken boy because I'm not." he snaps.

"That's the last thing I see you as." I assure him, "I see you as a confident, happy, free spirited guy." I pause and then rephrase, "An extremely attractive, confident, happy and free spirited guy."

Nik leans back in his seat and a small smile crosses his face as he looks up at me through his lashes. My stomach knots as his smile turns to a smirk and his eyes smolder. "Extremely attractive?" He repeats and licks his lips in the most delicious way. "That's not how friends are supposed to think about each other, Haven."

"We have never really been good at the whole just friends' thing, have we?" I whisper as my heart hammers like a machine gun inside of my chest.

"No, we haven't." his voice is smooth and rough at the same time. A delicate balance that shows his confidence and his desire.

It is me who moves first, leaning in towards him and that smirk on his face falters for just a moment. Then it's back and I watch as his pupils dilate in excitement. There is a tension between us, purely physical and my body is alive with nervous energy. As he leans nearer to me, our noses nearly touching, my mind flashes with hundreds of memories and I pull back slightly with a gasp.

"Nik," I don't move and my words come out as a broken whisper, "I don't have much time left here, so if we do this... I need to know that when I go... when I go home... you aren't going to do anything... stupid." I finish breathlessly.

"I promise." he breathes and then he cups my face in his hands, and closes the gap between us, pressing his soft lips to mine.

They are pleasantly familiar as they move against my own lips. Slow soft kisses that increase in pressure until our mouths open for each other. He slides his tongue against mine, and my nerve endings explode with pleasure. My hand reaches up to tangle in his hair and as I wrap my fingers around the blonde strands, he moans against my lips. I gasp at the sound of it and crush my lips hard into his. Wanting more. Needing more.

But breathing is necessary. Our lips part, and we lean our foreheads together, both desperate for air. My blood is pounding in my veins, and I am trembling with a need for him.

"We could have been doing this all along." He whispers and I can't help but laugh lightly. He is right, we could have had almost two full months of being together this way, if it wasn't for me and my fears of the past.

"We have it now." I breathe.

"I'll take what I can get." He grins and kisses me passionately before pulling himself away and darting from the truck. I watch as he runs around to my side of the truck and yanks my door open. I shriek in delight as he pulls me into his arms and spins us around in a circle. He slowly lowers me back to the ground, his beautiful brown eyes never leaving mine. They are shining with a happiness that I have never seen before. 

"Took you long enough." Jennie complains as Nik and I pull the bundles of firewood from the back of the truck. The minute I am in front of her she narrows her eyes at me and then they widen in excitement. "You guys kissed didn't you!" she squeals, sending her high-pitched voice echoing through the trees.

Ignoring her outburst, I shove the bundle of wood into her hands roughly "Take this," she does so, with a wide grin plastered on her face.

"It's about time." She looks from Nik and I, hoping for one of us to give her all the dirty details.

"What did Hayden say when we left?" Nik asks, his eyes darting over to where Hayden sits around the firepit.

"Nothing, Chase pulled him off into the woods all pissy and when they came back everything seemed fine." Jennie shrugs her shoulders. "Are you two all good?"

"Sure." He sounds casual but I am disappointed to find a sour look on his face. They need to sort this out. The last thing I want is to come between Nik and his friend. I nearly drop my bundle of wood on my toes as the thought rolls through my mind.

A girl coming between two friends.

A boy coming between two friends.

Hayden, Nik and Me... Becca, Nik and Me.

Suddenly, I feel sick with anxiety. Not only have I caused a rift between Nik and his friend but I still need to tell Becca about Nik. And now, there is even more to tell. What is she going to think about us being... whatever we are? Dating? Together? Boyfriend and girlfriend?

"Are you okay?" Nik asks an expression of concern rising to his face.

"I need to tell her about us." I answer in a dead voice. Nik doesn't need to ask; he knows exactly who I am talking about. "What do I say?" He takes the wood from my arms and places it by our feet. His arms wrap around me and I melt into them easily.

"Tell her we are happy. Tell her we are making the most of the time we have together." He tilts my chin up to look at him. "You two can make it through anything, don't worry about it." With his arm around my shoulders, he guides me towards the fire.

"Nik," I stop and turn to face him. "Don't be upset with Hayden. I don't want to come between you two." It appears he is about to argue this but then his face lights with recognition and he knows that I am thinking about the past. He nods, and we join the others around the fire. I bend down to sit in the chair beside Nik but he pulls me down onto his lap instead.

"Aww, you guys!" Jennie coo's, Bev and Clare clap excitedly, and Jordan reaches over to fist bump Nik.

"You're all ridiculous." Nik laughs, but bumps fists with Jordan, and then Cal too.

"Agreed," Chases scoffs, "we might as well all clink our glasses with forks to make them kiss!" he jokingly taps his beer can with his finger creating a dull thudding noise. The others join in, including Hayden, and I feel myself blush a deep red. Nik puts his finger on my chin, guides my face down to his, and kisses me fiercely.

They erupt into whoops and whistles and when our lips break apart, I genuinely laugh. Nik is grinning ear to ear and my heart swells with joy. I burry my face into the crook of his neck and inhale his intoxicating scent. Tonight, I will enjoy this happiness and tomorrow I will face the consequences of my actions; I just hope my best friend can forgive me.