Heeeeeey...

This, Heart needs love...It sounds like the song says that...

So...I have food and all...I just don't want to make it and my mom actually wants me to try and get a job at 15...March 9th is my birthday of course so...Yay...No...I hate it and I don't want to work at such a young age...I might have to and school is already stressful enough...and Soccer...I mean...if I get a job when I'm 15...I don't know what I'll do...I'll barely be online and my girlfriend...And I'm hungry and I usually make the same food or eat the same thing...over...And over...And over again until I want something else...I don't remember the last time I've had ice cream and I'm dying of heat over here...Even at night...I thought everything was great...When I was little...And then...I'm getting beat into reality! I just want to Scream forever...

I know some people are like "Grow up! You don't have it as bad as me!" Heh heh heh...News Flash!You don't know what happens behind closed doors!You don't know if some people are struggling or not!You don't know a damn thing!And you don't need to know our 'secrets' when you're just a stupid little shit!

Okay...I think I'm calm...I don't know...I just want to scream or cry or just rip my hair out...All 3 maybe...I feel so wrapped everywhere...I just want to go to Germany and hug her...She's always...Or usually there when I need her...Online...If I didn't have friends online I think I would've went insane already...Everything is just so difficult and frustrating...Anyway, I feel so...Sick and...I keep coughing...Mucus comes out of my throat...I still go to school...I barely eat and school lunch is basically my dinner...I actually lost weight...Which isn't a good thing...

I just feel as if God hates me and it still burns when I go to the bathroom...And...Females know what I mean by that time of month...Oh God why?????

That's all...Cya later...I guess...

-Sam