IX.
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Erin
I didn't sleep the rest of the night.
I woke up the next morning shortly after dawn. I dug through my bag and frowned. I had almost nothing left, I scowled down at the jeans I had been wearing for three days straight and finally pulled them on. They had been too big the first day, now they hung dangerously low on my hips. I was going to need more clothes and soon.
I went downstairs. Dean and Bobby were drinking coffee at the table while Sam cooked breakfast.
I cleared my throat. "I don't mean to be a pain, but I'm going to need to go to a Target or something and get some supplies."
Bobby scowled. "Supplies?" He asked in confusion, his eyes cut to where he had a couple of guns resting on top of his desk. "We got plenty of supplies."
I took a sip of coffee and rolled my eyes good-naturedly. "Yeah, there are other kinds of supplies," I joked gently. "You know, clothes, toiletries...my house kinda burned down two days ago remember? All I have is the stuff Jack put in my bug out bag. Not exactly helpful."
Dean took a swig of his coffee. "I'll drive you in after breakfast," he offered.
It was an odd sensation riding in the car alone with Dean. At first I was concerned it was going to be awkward but I soon found Dean was rarely out of his element. He pulled a box of cassettes out from under the seat and I found we had similar taste in music. He let me rifle through the box until I found one I liked. He and I sang along to Metallica as we drove into town.
Dean parked the Impala in the back of the lot and we walked side by side into Target. It was late morning and the store was mostly empty, but Dean still seemed wary. I glanced around us, but I didn't see anything that accounted for how on edge he was.
I slipped my hand into the pocket of my jacket and my fingers touched the cool fabric of the charm bag. Content that we were safe I let the tiniest portion of my wall dip. I was hit by an almost overwhelming amount of emotions from the people surrounding us. I hesitated a step as I slammed my wall back up, but managed to trip over my own feet.
Dean caught my arm easily. His thumb brushed the inside of my arm and it felt like an electric jolt as his wariness, fatigue, and suspicion rolled through me. He didn't let go of me as he stared down into my eyes.
"You okay?" He asked, his brows wrinkling in concern as he studied my face. His gaze moved over my eyes and my cheeks. I nodded a few too many times as I felt his surprise, concern, wariness and when his gaze landed on my lips there was a flash of want that was like a physical caress.
Dean seemed to realize he was still touching me. His hand dropped away quickly but the tension between us stretched taunt. He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck boyishly. "Sorry-" he dragged off uncomfortably.
I glanced around and my eyes landed on the in-store Starbucks. "Coffee?" I asked him, desperate to clear up the tension. It wasn't his fault he couldn't hide anything from me.
"Sure," he said reaching for his wallet.
"My treat," I insisted. "It's the least I could do."
"You don't have to buy me coffee," he assured me.
I waved him off already moving towards the line, the need to be moving and doing something was almost overwhelming. "What would you like?"
"Just regular, black coffee," he said moving towards the carts. He grabbed one and met me in line. I handed him his coffee and he pushed the cart towards the women's clothing section as he sipped from his cup.
It was strangely domestic having Dean Winchester following me as I shopped. I glanced back at him. He was leaning against the cart casually, but his eyes took in every detail around us. I couldn't get over the absurdity of having a Hunter shopping with me and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from chuckling out loud.
He glanced towards me questioningly but I quickly turned and pulled a handful of jeans off the shelf. I wasn't about to throw his kindness back in his face. I sorted through the pile looking for the right sizes, not really caring about style.
"I never did thank you, you know for saving me and hauling me all around the Midwest," I said tossing four pairs of jeans in the cart.
"It's my job," Dean said with a casual shrug. He continued to scan the area for possible threats, although there was a quiet confidence about him that was reassuring.
I tossed a handful of plain grey and black t-shirts in the cart and gestured to the store around us. "I think this goes above and beyond your job description," I said with a snort.
Dean flashed a charming smile and took a sip of coffee. "All in the line of duty."
I led the way into the athletic section, pulling several pairs of capris and athletic t-shirts. I tossed a pack of socks in the cart and moved into the lingerie section.
I glanced over my shoulder at Dean but he didn't seem at all bothered or embarrassed. I pulled three bras off the rack and two packs of black boy shorts.
"I think it's safe to say this goes above and beyond the call of duty." I said gesturing with the pack of underwear.
Dean snorted. "It's the best part," he said with a wink.
I laughed but couldn't help feeling a little guilty. He and Sam had already done so much for me, and now they brought my trouble to another friend of theirs. "You know, you could have left me in Kulm," I said looking up at him from under my lashes. I didn't want to be on my own necessarily, but I also didn't want to be a burden.
"With that witch? No way," he brushed it off, taking another sip of coffee.
For some reason his casual dismissal rubbed me the wrong way and I narrowed me eyes at him. "I could have found my own way," I told him, my voice surprisingly hard even to my own ears. "I'm a big girl."
Dean stopped, he turned calculating eyes back to me and ran them up and down my body. For the first time it felt like maybe he was taking me seriously. Measuring my mettle instead of just assuming I was just another poor girl he needed to rescue. "I'm sure you could," he finally conceded though he didn't sound convinced.
I scowled at him but instead of setting him back as I had hoped the ass flashed me a flirty smile. "Seriously Dean, you don't have to keep me with you," I told
him.
He grunted and gestures to the shelves around us. "You need some of this crap? Or are we done?" He asked.
I blew out a sigh, it was clear I wasn't going to convince him. I snatched up a new toothbrush and toothpaste and led the way towards the deodorant aisle.
We were silent all the way through the makeup aisles, the silence stretching between us. I refused to be the one who gave in. He may be the big bad hunter and I recognized that at the end of the day he called the shots, but if I was staying I needed information and I wasn't going to get it pitching a fit. Even the brief brushes with his emotions convinced me I could out patience him any day.
It wasn't long before he blew out an impatient breath. "Look, we need to figure this demon out as much as you do, maybe more."
"So..." I dragged off as I studied the selection of hairbrushes. "What is it with you guys and this demon?"
Dean turned to face me, lifting his eyebrows. He obviously had assumed I was as in the dark as Bobby tried to keep
me the night before.
"I'm not an idiot Dean. Clearly there is some history there."
Dean hesitated, pursing his lips thoughtfully. I wanted to feel what he was feeling, but there were too many people around and I couldn't risk being overwhelmed. "Can I ask you something and have you be straight with me?" He asked gruffly.
His eyes were hard and wary again and even knowing the risks I dropped the wall for a fraction of a second. Distrust swirled around me and I slammed the wall up, crossing my arms over my chest. "I won't lie to you." I promised him.
He cast me a look of disbelief and I scoffed. "I never lied to you. I omitted the truth, but I never lied."
He shook his head and looked away. All friendly teasing was gone now and once more I was faced with just the hunter.
"I'll answer your question," I promised.
He looked skeptical and his hands tightened on the sides of the cart. "Are you being straight with us about your abilities? Can you read minds?"
I couldn't help it, I actually laughed.
His face locked down into a scowl and I clamped a hand over my mouth. "I'm sorry," I said quickly. "I shouldn't have laughed. No. The answer is no. I can't read minds."
"There's been times..." he dragged off distrustfully.
"I can read emotions," I told him. "And given even a little amount of context I can usually come pretty close."
Dean reaches into the pocket of his leather coat and lifted out the picture of his dad, Bobby and Jack. "Like with this?" He asked, holding it up between two fingers.
I nodded and stared down at my feet. "And with the demon. Recognition, rage, revenge..." I peaked back up at him from
under a curtain of my hair. "It all comes together and paints a pretty vivid picture, then when he called you by name..." I dragged off.
Dean shoved his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, I get it." He agreed.
"Is this what Bobby was trying to keep from me?" I asked bluntly, dropping my wall another millisecond. I was starting to get pretty good at it, although it was draining and a small headache was developing behind my eyes. I was already starting to feel tired and wasn't sure how many more times I would be able to do it.
Dean looked away guiltily but nodded. He was telling the truth. "Look Beckett," he said. "This demon...we have a history. He killed my parents and he's been after my brother and kids just like him and we don't know why. But he's been MIA for a while."
I thought back to the conversation on the side of the road when Sam has asked me about being psychic and my birthday. He had been almost disappointed to find out I wasn't born that year. "Psychic kids?" I asked.
Dean nodded grimly. "Whatever he's up to, it isn't good."
I turned to face him as another thought dawned on me. "Are you planning on using me as bait?" I asked quickly and dropped my wall one last time
to feel his gut reaction.
Dean actually flinched as disgust and repulsion rolled through him. I slammed the wall back up. "Why would you ask that? He sputtered.
I shrugged, I already had the answer I needed. Just the thought of using me as
bait was abhorrent to him. It meant I was still safe with him. "You're a hunter and you finally have something it wants."
Dean's eyes flashed dangerously and I actually took a half step away from his anger. "It wants you, and you're a person," he growled. "I don't just hand people over to the monsters."
I stared hard at him and he made a frustrated noise in the back of his throat. He reached down and grabbed my wrist. His emotions swirled through me so much more intense than before. I closed my eyes against the rush of temper, distaste, frustration, and strangely self-loathing. It was that one that made my eyes snap open in surprise. His green eyes were burning with temper just inches away.
"Do you need me to say the words again-or?"
"No," I said a little breathlessly.
"Good," Dean said briskly and the intensity of his agitation faded until a brief sliver of hurt pulsed through. "This enough stuff?" he asked looking down into the cart.
I nodded and he cocked his head to the side as though checking to make sure i was being sincere. I nodded again and turned to head towards the registers. Dean let his hand drop, leaving me alone in my head again.
I paid for my stuff and Dean snagged the bags, leading the way back to his car. I felt guilty. I had hurt his feelings. It surprised me, and yet it probably shouldn't have. He seemed to have a sort of twisted sense of honor that he stuck to and I had all but accused him of using me to get revenge.
Once the doors were closed I glanced towards him sheepishly. "I'm sorry." I said in a low voice.
He turned to look at me in surprise.
"For what?" He asked harshly. "Accusing me of being a self serving dick wad? Or using your whammy against me?"
I flinched in surprise and the looked down at my hands as my ears burned. "I shouldn't have assumed you would use me as bait. You've given me no reason not to trust you."
Dean blew out a frustrated breath. "Jack really taught you not to trust hunters huh?"
I nodded, taking a small sip of my cold starbucks. "He said if they found out what I could do most would hunt me on principle."
Dean's lips pressed into a grim line. "Look," he said uncomfortably. "I know monsters. You're no monster."
I glanced up at him from under my hair and he made a noise in the back of his throat. He reached out and being very careful not to touch my skin directly he slid my hair behind my ear and out of my face.
"I mean it," he added a little severely.
I nodded and sniffed. "I know," I promised him.
He turned the key and the engine rumbled to life. "Now, are you going to apologize for using your whammy against me?" I turned to him and blinked a few times but said nothing. He snorted in disgust but there was a glimmer of respect in his eyes as he shifted the car into gear. "I didn't think so."
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Dean
Bobby and Sam were waiting for us on the porch when we got back. Before she could move I scooped up Erin's bags and got out of the car. She shot me an annoyed look but didn't say anything about it as she followed.
Bobby didn't even wait for us to climb the stairs before he started in. "Whatever's happening, it's big. I got a call back from a psychic I know. Five are dead so far across the country."
"Five?" I rocked back on my heals and glanced towards Erin. This was bigger than we thought. Her grey eyes were wide with shock and she had wrapped her arms around her slim waist. "And they're just figuring it out now?" I asked more harshly than I needed to. It wasn't like it was Bobby's fault. Without realizing I was doing it, I took a step towards Erin.
Bobby scowled at my tone but didn't call me on it. "They aren't a close group. But she said she just got a call from another psychic. A woman outside of Saint Paul Loraine Wyatt. Said she was scared, claimed someone was after her."
I pressed my lips together. Third hand info was better than nothing, and Saint
Paul was barely a four hour drive. "All right, we'll go check it out," I agreed and turned to face Erin. She was looking a little shell shocked again, but she wasn't freaking out, which I appreciated. She really was tough as hell. "You'll be safe here," I assured her.
She stiffened and glanced out of the corner of her eye at Bobby. He hadn't been the most welcoming since we arrived, but she had to know by now that he wouldn't hurt her. Her eyes hardened and she set her chin defiantly.
"Beckett-" I drew off, knowing I wasn't going to like whatever was about to come out of her mouth.
She turned to face me, though her grey eyes were snapping with resolve her tone was perfectly reasonable. It was maddening. "If this person is a psychic, they might know more of what's happening, and she might need me to be there."
I clenched my jaw. I had never been as good at keeping my temper. "If this woman is being hunted by the demons, you think I'm just going to hand deliver you to those bastards?"
"We need to know what's happening!" She snapped back.
"I finally got you safe, I'm not dragging you back into this."
She took a step towards me. "I'm in this!" She exclaimed.
Sam arched his eyebrows glancing back and forth between Erin and I. I wasn't going to give an inch and I could tell by the defiant set to her chin that she wasn't going to either.
Something changed on her face as her expression became more focused, just like it had on and off when she had interrogated me in Target. I narrowed my eyes. "Nah uh," I said stabbing a finger at her. "Don't you dare use your whammy to get your way."
She blinked in shock. "You can-" She started to say, but stopped as a blush crept up her neck at being caught. She was going to have to work on her poker face if she hopes to get it past me.
"You get a look on your face," I growled triumphantly. I might not be able to use Jedi mind tricks on her, but I could at least tell when they were being used on me.
She scowled at me and just like earlier it made something in my chest tighten. She was trying to look fierce but it made me feel protective instead. No doubt it would piss her off to no end to hear that. I wisely kept my mouth shut.
Behind us Bobby cleared his throat. "Dean, she has a point. This involves her, you can't keep her from it," Bobby said.
I turned to scowl at Bobby, but unlike Sam Bobby didn't wilt under my glare.
Erin took a step towards me. "Dean," She said gently and she reached out and gently laid a hand over my leather covered forearm. "I'm in the middle of this, we need to figure it out. I can't hide forever."
She was trying to look convincing but the gentle earnestness of her gaze made me want to protect her from this shit even more. The problem was, they were both right. I exhaled exhaustedly, scrubbing at my face with the heels of my hands. "You're gonna do exactly what I say," i commanded dropping my hands so I could look her in the eyes.
A small, sexy smirk tugged at one corner of her mouth. If we were anywhere else I would have done something about it, but I was dead serious. "I'm not joking," I said severely.
Her expression sobered and she nodded. "I know," She said holding her hands up in surrender. "I got it."
I was being an ass again. I could feel it. I sighed, knowing there wasn't anything I could do about it. "Get your bag."
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