There is a price to pay for speaking the truth, there is a bigger price for living the lie

~Cornel West

Devansh

"Sir, What are you doing here at this time?" I asked our Microprocessors professor Mr. Jatin and hostel warden Mr. Raj standing on the other side of the door .

I looked at Janu from the corner of my eye, who playing with her hands in panic and with her eyes closed mumbling something.

"We heard a someone scream and are checking every room if everything is alright." Jatin sir asked me.

"Oh! That was Aarthav, he was bouncing on the bed and slipped." I lied to him and held the door tight hoping they won't catch my lie.

"Is he okay?" They asked me worriedly looking for Aarthav in the room.

"Yeah, I am. Just twisted my ankle, I'll be fine sir" Aarthav answered lying on his bed and I opened the door completely hiding Janu behind it.

"Start acting like adults, and be ready by 7 tomorrow." Raj mumbled and I looked at them with a smile and closed the door.

I huffed down the breath the I was holding in worry. Thank god! We didn't get caught.

"I just felt a wave of affection for you Aarthav, thank you for not ratting me out." Janu said to him with a pinch of sarcasm walking to the bed.

"I did this for my friend not you." He snickered at her.

"Don't say that BeBe, I know you love me." She winked, riling him up.

They do bicker all the time, can you believe they never had a normal conversation without fighting this last 3 years?

"Stop calling me that and I am not your BeBe or whatever that is."

"You are my best friend's boyfriend and boyfriend's best friend, So I am your bebe and you are my bebe." She explained making me laugh.

She is crazy! And I am crazy for her.

"Okay Janu, that's enough. You take my bed and I will share with Aarthav." I stopped them before we get another person comes knocking.

"I am not sacrificing my bed for her, She is your problem not mine. Good Night." He replied sprawling across the bed and turning the lights off.

And that's how me and Janu ended up on the same bed, lying the opposite edges tugging the sheets, One small shove and we both will land on the floor. I could feel her twist, turn and sigh.

"Janu, Are you okay?"I asked her.

"I am, it's just that I am having an inner battle inside, I want to be close to you at the same time I am worried that you would think that I am desperate. We sit closer than this and we already slept together on your birthday, not on the bed th." I stopped her ramble by moving closer and spooned her into my arms.

"I wanted to be close to you too, I love you my crazy nut.."I said and kissed her on the head, enjoying her smell.

"Remember me, I am still in the room. No adult stuff under the sheets please." Aarthav said making us chuckle.

After a few minutes of silence, her breathing slowed down and her body warmed up, Look at her sleeping with no care in the world what she does to me, with her cute button nose, doe eyes, those glossy lips and that beautifully carved face.

She snuggled into my arms, with her head on my chest and her hand around my waist. I felt a something warm in my chest, she gives me feelings that nobody has ever done, giving me the purest and genuine happiness.

She is the definition of perfect, and even if it's not she has the ability to make it perfect to me. This crazy girl is mine but I am waiting for the day to officially make her mine and sleep beside her forever without any sneaking or worry that we might get caught.

"Devansh, Are you sleeping?" I heard Aarthav ask me after a few minutes.

How can I? When she looks so cute and makes my heart beat go ballistic, When this might be the only night where I can have her in my arms, I don't wanna loose her to sleep, I wanna loose myself in her.

"No!"I whispered so she won't wake up and he hummed in response.

"What happened to you? Are you okay?" I asked him as he sounded low, and the Aarthav I know can sleep the minute he gets into bed, he is blessed like that.

"I am scared about my relationship with Manju, She is better than me in everything, What if one day she is realizes that I am not worthy of her and leaves me? Her father is really old school what if he says no because of my past and won't approve me?" He voiced out his thoughts and insecurities.

Silent nights are human's worst enemies, with brain numbing silence everywhere, we can hear all self doubting thoughts in our brains making us restless and sleepless.

"Aarthav, Don't let the future and anything else scare you into giving up, when people are meant to be together and no one can break them apart. Manjula is a really great girl and I am glad you have her in your life, she makes you a better person and I for one saw the change firsthand. Don't worry and enjoy what you have now." I tried to explain to him what I knew and felt when I started going out with Janu.

"I know I act like I hate Jagruthi but I really like her for you, she adds color to your boring life and I see how happy and red you become when you are with her." He said after sometime making me happy and I pulled her closer to me.

"Don't you dare tell her, I said all these. And thank you for cheering me up." He said and dozed off, while I enjoyed the girl in my arms for tonight.

I still cherish that night and that tour, I didn't care about everyone watching us. Making her happy is my main goal, her smile makes me feels like I won the world.

"Everyone is really worked up with this first company coming to college." Aarthav said as I was getting ready to go class through the conference rooms.

We are in our 7th semester, where we have companies come over and pick students for the jobs.

Time is so subjective, when you start to enjoy something in life you don't feel it go by just like past year of my life, when you start to hate what you are doing it feels like an eternity.

Today we have an Electronics company here for placements. So, everyone is walking around with panic written all over their faces.

Aarthav and me are not doing this, He is gonna looks after his father's company and I am going back to my village. We wished all our friends good luck and walked to the class, which is basically a free period.

I found Janu sleeping with her head on the desk, she woke up 10 min back when I called her and she is sleeping again.

"Wake up!" Aarthav slapped her desk and walked away putting his headphones on, and she jerked out of the chair, her eyes all red and hair disheveled, She literally looks like she walked out of her bed.

"Rise and shine baby! You look like you didn't sleep for months." I asked and settled beside her.

I just can't seem to get enough of her, is it possible for a person to look different every single time you see her? It happens to me, It feels like I am seeing her for the first time every single day.

"Stop staring at my face. I feel really conscious of my pimple, Ms.Zitty here." She said hiding her pimple which is on the left cheek with her hair making me laugh at her childish antics.

She names her pimples every single time, and has an emotional low at that period of time, because of her hormones.

I took her hand in mine, pushed her hair back analyzing the beautiful face and said

"Do you think I am that shallow Janu? And Ms.Zitty makes you more human otherwise I would think that you are a doll."

She gaped at my answer and slapped me on the shoulder with a smile.

"I don't get why you love me but I am glad you do." She mumbled holding my hand and leaned her head on my shoulder.

See the emotional low I talked about. I don't understand why it's taboo to talk about periods in our culture, It's not a shameful to have them, it's a natural thing that woman are blessed and cursed with at the same time.

I am really glad that Janu does talk about it, and she explained to me how the whole thing works and how much of a pain it is, it makes me feel worthless that I can't do anything despite being there for her. So, I try to cheer her up with chocolates and hugs, because if there is anything in the world which can Janu feel better its those two things.

I started carrying chocolates with me all the time just for her, I shuffled through my bag and found a Munch bar, I opened the wrap and handed it to her so she can enjoy and forget the pain for sometime.

"Do you think I am stupid and dumb? Manju says I need my own goal and not follow what you. I really don't have a goal in life, I tried hard to find something I like but they just fluctuate every single time." She complained like a little baby eating the chocolate.

I was hurt that Manjula said that but I understand her ideology, Janu needs to be independent and have her own goals, She has to be her own person and I am all in if she wants me to help her find that.

"I know you are confused about the career path right now. But you are neither stupid nor dumb. You are the most amazing and talented person Janu, You never know what you want until you try it, if you fail and then you try something else, you keep trying and never give up because who knows the 101st idea might work for you. Whatever happens I am gonna be by your side and help you find your success." I told her remembering my own teacher who taught me to never give up in anything.

"I am sorry for rubbing all my negativity on you today, I am just thinking too much and sometimes I feel like whatever I do is gonna end in me hurting you because of my decisions, I am scared that you will leave me and fall out of love." She said sniffling trying to control her tears.

"It's okay love, I am here to not only share your happiness, I am here for the pain and the insecurities too. And as of us hurting each other, We don't have the power over what might hurt each other but what we can do us stick together and let the pain pass through. And to be honest I am scared too, you know what falling in love means coping with the risk of falling out of it someday, love doesn't exist without suffering Janu. "

"Dev, just remember that all the things I did and will do were never meant to hurt you, I did everything with the only thought, to have to all my life and I willing to go any extent." She said holding me tight with a fear that she might lose me.

Silly girl! Why will I reject her? She is the best thing that happened to me so far in my life. She makes me happy and content like no one ever can.

"I know you will never hurt me intentionally Janu. So, don't worry." I told and wrapped my arms around her.

"You are the best boyfriend ever, I love you too much." She said pulling my cheeks and hugged my waist.

I pulled her closer and placed my lips on her head.

Sometimes she talks in a cryptic language about her hurting me, when she is the one making me happy but who would be stupid enough to lose her? I am definitely not.

"Leave it you two to gross out the class room too. Keep your hands off each other , I can't see it anymore." Aarthav said making me chuckle and face him.

No teacher came to the class that day,  Manjula joined us after the first break. We roamed around the campus and had fun for the next two days. After that our schedule turned into our boring classes with the occasional seminars on different career paths like GRE, GMAT and other career options.

ECE has been the on going winner of the Inter-college sports in cricket ever since, I would say that my life has been going so smooth lately, my parents know about my relationship with Janu, so does the whole college. I have the Janu, cricket, my family and friends with me.

"Excuse me Sir, Final year students are requested to meet in the Auditorium by the dean." Bell boy announced in the middle of our 3rd hour, and everyone in the classes started murmuring.

"I was about sleep and now we have to attend some stupid seminar, atleast we can skip this boring class and have attendance." Charan said packing his bag.

I waited by door for Janu,  who's taking her sweet time talking to Nidhi, Samrat and Rey. Aarthav went towards Manjula's class as soon as the bell rang.

"Learn from him Sammy, he is waiting for her." Nidhi said pointing me.

"I've been waiting for you from the last 10 years if you remember." Samrat replied shutting up Nidhi.

"Thank you, Let's go." Janu mumbled and held my hand.

We walked to the auditorium in the main building of the college, There is security outside the room wearing black uniforms and guns, that's something new.

We were the last ones to get in and Aarthav was already in the back of the room with Manjula and Kajal waving at us, we settled near them and started talking to each other, with me on the aisle and Janu beside me.

After a few minutes everyone went quite and started looking at the door, My eyes followed them and I found our C.M Jagadeesh Dhanraj  and his wife Sruthi Dhanraj walk in the room followed by 4 of his security crew.

Jagruthi squealed in happiness looking at them making me jealous and happy at the same time.

I have to get her meet them personally, if she likes him so much that's the best memory I can provide her.

The student body president is in the cricket team I could talk to him and find our the schedule and get them to personally meet her. She will ecstatic and happier than ever, I took my phone out and started texting him before the dean started the meeting.

I really hope I didn't bore you with this chapter.

I was busy with an interview for a job and a family event, it was a really busy weekend and Maybe I was not in the right mind space to do it right and I wanted to update since it's been so long.

Sorry if you did feel bored, it's gonna get interesting from the next chapter onward.

So sit tight and don't leave me alone here.

Don't forget to vote and comment.

Love,

Sneha