"Something's wrong, isn't it?" Mikey had noticed the very moment he'd seen Gerard today, and the awkward ten minute silence they shared eating breakfast only served to consolidate such a fact. If Mikey knew anything, it was that his brother definitely wasn't acting himself today, because even though they may absolute loathe one another at times, Gerard would still always be Mikey's brother.

"Mmm?" Gerard jerked up a little, blushing under Mikey's glare - that kind of 'don't even try and lie your way out of it, I know something's up and you are going to tell me' look that Gerard had grown to fear.

"Look, don't even try and bullshit me, Gerard - something's wrong and it's something serious, because look, you haven't even made one stupid sarcastic joke about how my hair's sticking up a little in the back and you haven't mentioned anything- you haven't said anything, Gerard."

"I hadn't noticed your hair." Mikey was utterly unconvinced. "Honestly." Gerard's words made no change to Mikey's skepticism and by the glare he sent his brother, he made sure that he was well aware of that.

"Whatever, just tell me what's wrong - you're upset and you're my brother, it's just unnerving, I guess... I don't like it." Mikey shrugged it off, trying with all he had not to get too affectionate, because well, he had an angsty facade to up keep: it was just rather apparent that Gerard was making it more than just a little difficult to do so today.

"Nothing's wrong." Gerard promised him, and yeah, it was the worst excuse for a promise Mikey had ever heard, but it wasn't like it really mattered, because it wasn't like Mikey was giving up any time soon.

"Yeah, Gerard, and I'm the president of Iraq." Mikey rolled his eyes, getting up and making himself a third cup of coffee: Mrs Way had to leave early for a business meeting, and Mikey was making sure to fully exploit her absence in the form of having just as many cups of coffee as his bladder could cope with, which wasn't something that his mother was usually very fond of.

"Maybe you are the president of Iraq." Gerard suggested, shrugging a little, and Mikey was just astounded as to how this shitty liar was the guy who'd managed to convince Frank Iero that he was female (and worth speaking to) for months on end.

"Gerard..." Mikey exhaled loudly, turning back to face his brother. "Tell me truthfully, and I'll make you coffee, how about that?" And with the awkward smile on his brother's face, Mikey knew he had won.

"Fuck, why do you know me so well- coffee should be off limits, you know? Coffee's like the one way to convince me of anything - it gives you far too much of an advantage, and it's not far." Gerard groaned, pushing his hair behind his ear and meeting his brother's gaze.

"Well maybe your coffee addiction is something you should consider dealing with then - it's not my problem, Gerard." Mikey shrugged it off, grabbing a second coffee mug from the cupboard and boiling the kettle. "Now, I do believe you owe me an explanation."

"Mikey, please, look... this is more than a manipulate me into telling you with a cup of coffee kind of thing- fuck, this is a serious thing... this is... this is something that's bothering me and this is something I've been thinking about pretty much non-stop for the past few days. In fact, I'm kind of scared to tell you: to let it out of my head and well, let it be real." Gerard sighed out, struggling to verbalise just how he felt and how important one fucking stupid thing had managed to become: it was ridiculous and Gerard knew it like he knew he hated Frank Iero.

On the topic of Frank Iero: the two hadn't spoken in days, and Frank hadn't shown up at school either, leaving Gerard to conclude that maybe, just maybe, this had affected him just a little more than he was at all willing to let on, but whatever, Gerard didn't care- he wasn't supposed to care - he was supposed to hate Frank, and maybe, Frank deserved this.

"Well, drink some coffee and then you'll feel okay enough to tell me, look, I'm your brother - you managed to come out to me, if you can do that, then how hard can this be?" Mikey's face gave way to a smile at that point, as he carried the two cups of coffee back over to the dining table: placing one in front of Gerard and holding the other in his hands.

"It's harder, Mikey, I promise you, this is so damn hard and this is just crazy and messed up, because I'm not sure with this, you know? With my sexuality, well, the fact that I was gay was kind of hard to actually tell people about, but it was just something I always knew deep down, but this... this kind of just crept up on me and god, I don't have a fucking clue as to how to deal with it-"

"Gerard, it can't be that bad, it's not as if you've decided that you want to become a woman, is it?" Mikey laughed it off, but Gerard sat there, deadly silent.

"Kind of." He admitted: quiet as a mouse and with a million regrets, but the two words fell from his lips with eventuality.

"What?" Mikey nearly spilled his coffee at that, disregard the cup to sit down beside his brother. "This is to do with Frank, isn't it? Come on, Gerard, this has to stop."

"No, Mikey, you've got it all wrong- this isn't anything to do with Frank, this is about me and how it made me feel when you told me to burn all my skirts, and this is about how I'm coming to realise that maybe I liked dressing feminine just a bit more than I would have accounted for- like... I'm still... I'm still... I don't know, I don't know what I am exactly... it's fucked up and it's complicated, Mikey: this is why I've been thinking- it's just that, I don't feel like a guy but I don't feel like a girl either... it doesn't make sense."

"Okay." Mikey responded after a second of silence and thinking, before then flashing Gerard a smile. "You know what? Skip school today - we're going to figure this out, I'll help you."

"Mikey are you sure?" Gerard exclaimed, wondering just how much trouble Mikey would be in when his mum eventually found out.

"Yeah, of course I am - making sure that you're comfortable with yourself is far more important than one shitty ass day at school." Mikey got up from the table, finishing his coffee. "I'll get your laptop and we can research this if you want?"

"Yeah." Gerard smiled, and fuck, he smiled like he meant it. "You know what, Mikey? You're the best brother I could ever ask for."

"Is that so?"

"Yeah."

"Then if it is, I'd really appreciate it if you could go without mentioning anything about the weed I hid down the back of the sofa yesterday, even though it smells."

-

"Frank your whole life is one big train wreck and you seem utterly hesitant to ever do anything about it: explain." Jamia Nestor found herself in Frank Iero's bedroom for the fourth time in three days and really it was getting ridiculous considering the fact that neither of the two had any intentions of ever sleeping with one another, ever.

"There's this girl." Frank groaned, shaking his head up at the most intimidating girl he'd ever met, and of course, with such a title, he had no choice but to call her one of his closest friends.

"Yes, Frank, it's you, there's always a girl - in fact, there's usually more than one, but whatever, just get to the point." Her patience with the angsty emo lump that was now refusing to leave his bedroom was more than in abundance at this point.

"But there's a boy as well-"

"Ooh, she has a boyfriend, goddamn Iero, you really are a fucking wonderful asshole, you know? And what, he kicked your ass and now you're shit scared to show your face in society, because if so, grow some fucking balls, kid. Balls - grow them. And maybe don't fuck girls with boyfriends that are stronger than you, huh?" Jamia rolled her eyes, giggling a little.

"No, Jamia." He shook his head, meeting her eyes. "She doesn't have a boyfriend- I have a boyfriend... I guess... well kind of... not technically, but we're-"

"You're telling me that you, the guy who's fucked every girl I know, besides myself, because I know you well enough to consider my own dignity when it comes to being alone with you, has decided that he's gay? You're gay, Frank, what next? Life on Mars?"

"Actually, scientists reckon that's kind of likely..." Frank trailed off, sitting up in bed now, and leaving Jamia to sit beside him. "But... I guess... I don't know, sometimes I feel like I'm gay, and sometimes I just want to fuck girls and sometimes I just want to get myself into detention so I can suck off the cutest guy I've ever seen in an art room - I actually did that, by the way, and it was really fucking nice, and god, I fucking- this guy, this guy is a liferuiner and this girl she found out about this guy and she wasn't happy."

"So, okay, Frank, you're bi then? I guess this does kind of make sense the more I think about it. So, with this guy... is it just a fuck thing of thing or have you actually found someone you have actual romantic feelings for?"

"I think I love him." Frank admitted, falling back against the bed and leaving Jamia to stare wide eyed across the room as she struggled to process the fact that Frank Iero had actually become capable of love. "But I was dating her, and she broke up with me and dear god I feel like shit because she was perfect and funny and hot, and-"

"Text this guy and ask him to meet you later - sort something out, because if you love him then just spend time with him is going to make you feel better about this, now come on, look, if you fell in love with this guy whilst you were dating her, then you never really loved her, did you?"

"She wore lots of really short miniskirts and I think I spent far too much time obsessing over that to really assess how I feel, but I guess, girls are just distracting with their boobs and curves and you get caught up in how they make you physically feel, whereas, with guys, with him, I don't see boobs and something to fuck, I just see him and I go fuzzy inside because he makes me feel so good just by being around me."

"Fucking hell, who is this guy and is he some kind of magician, because to get Frank Iero to fall in love, he has to be." She exclaimed, laughing a little and Frank forced a smile in response. "Wait, who actually is this guy? I want to assess your life choices here, Iero."

"His name's Gerard Way-"

"Holy fuck, Frank, are you shitting me? That emo guy who's like a god at art? He's fucking gay as hell though, you've got that at the very least- but fuck, him? Really?"

"He's cute." Frank blushed a little, sitting up and pulling his knees up to his chest. "I guess now that I dumped her I could make this work with him, but I feel like I'm going to fuck it all up - I'm no good at relationships, I'm just good at fucking, you know that. But then again, this is gaysex, not that I haven't had that before but-"

"Do I even want to know?" Jamia exhaled, rolling her eyes at him. "No, I don't, I'm deciding that for you, but come on, introduce me to him and I'll be your own personal cupid."

"That sounds like a really fucking terrible idea, you know." Frank sighed out, getting out of bed for the first time in far too long and grabbing his phone from the bedside table. "I'll text him, though - help me decide what to wear."

"Oh, so you're going full on homo now are you?" She raised her eyebrows, smirking a little.

"Fuck off."

"Whatever, I'm just waiting until you two are together and maybe then I'll have the slightest hope that you'll stop being such a miserable piece of shit all the time."

"I'm not a miserable piece of shit-"

"Mmm... sure." 

-

"Mikey?" Gerard sighed out, watching as Mikey texted their mum back with some bullshit excuse as to why the school had rang her up and said they weren’t in today: of course, they were obviously both just really late, of course.

"Yeah? You're alright now, aren't you? I don't want this to freak you out and I want you to be happy, okay? Even if this isn't any clearer, but that's okay... these things take figuring out, don't they?" Mikey spoke all too quickly, discarding his phone on the ground as he made a move towards the laptop, and not even glancing at his brother for one short moment throughout the whole procedure.

"I think I kind of have figured it out... some of it, at least... I mean... I... I think I'd prefer they/them pronouns... I'm non-binary, I know that at the least, but in further detail, that's where it gets complicated, but this is okay for now, I guess." Gerard blushed a little as they spoke, looking away from their brother as they spoke: nerves were of course nothing but expected, but by this point, they should have known that Mikey wasn't in any position to judge whatsoever.

"Okay." Mikey stopped for a moment: words once all too fast and all at once, slowing down and fading away into nothing more than a simple nod and a slightly postponed smile. "Yeah, if it makes you feel better, then yeah."

"I don't want to throw away the girl clothes." Gerard added as they got up from the floor, grabbing their phone from the table, and being more than just a little to surprised to find that there was evidence in the form of a text message that there was at least one person in the world that actually wanted to talk to them.

"That's okay as well, I guess. So you're just going to wear boy clothes and girl clothes interchangeably?" Mikey asked, watching as Gerard's eyes widened at their phone screen as they read that one text message that had somehow become so much more important than it should have been.

"Mikey- fuck, f-fuck... Frank just asked me on a date." Gerard practically dropped their phone to the floor - of course they didn't actually, because then they'd be no way to reply to Frank and that would be problematic to say the least.

"Gee or the real you?" Mikey asked, just a little skeptical towards the situation, to say the least, and in contrast, despite their supposed hatred of the guy, Gerard seemed absolutely overjoyed.

"Gerard, me- he... he... I guess he broke up with Gee, but... I don't know... for one... I don't want to have to try and explain this whole gender thing to someone like him and I don't want to be called he again... even with just a few minutes, this instantly feels better, this is me, this fits." Gerard groaned, pushing their hair behind their ears as they let out nothing short of the world's least enthusiastic groan.

"Well, you don't have to, but that's one sure-fire way to test if he actually cares about you or if he just wants to fuck you around, but don't do what's going to upset you, promise me that, Gerard?" Gerard nodded in response, before resorting to silence for a few minutes: thinking it over and trying their best not to just fuck up their life completely, but then again, Gerard Way wasn't exactly the best person when it came to making sane and sensible decisions, especially ones that involved Frank Iero.

"I'm going to do it. I'm going to tell him. I'll invite him over, is that okay?" They asked, blushing a little, as they began to text out a response to the sixteen year old.

"Yeah, I'm going to get out of here before he arrives and you two start fucking, though." Mikey rolled his eyes, smirking a little as Gerard only continued to blush. "Call me if he starts being an asshole though and I'll punch him for you."

"I can punch him myself." Gerard protested, but Mikey could only scoff in response as he grabbed his phone and his jacket.

"I'm going to go see if Pete Wentz has gotten over his big gay crush yet." Mikey announced, grinning like an idiot as he made his way towards the door.

"He's going to be at school." Gerard reminded their brother, eyes narrowed and trying their best not to make it overly apparent as to how they were holding their breath as they pressed the send button, because god, there was no way around the fact that Frank Iero mattered all too much when in reality, he was nothing more than irrelevant. "You know, you could just go to school as well, you know."

"Yeah, you and Frank should be at school today as well, but I'm letting you have the day off to fuck and make up or something, because seeing you sad is really fucking unsettling, asshole, go on, prove to me that you're not sad." Mikey smirked at the seventeen year old, leaving Gerard to roll their eyes: apprehensive as fuck at first, but soon giving in, because maybe there was just something indescribable, yet wonderful about insulting Mikey Way.

"Your hair sticks up in the back and it looks fucking stupid." And just like that, Mikey was grinning like an idiot.

"That's what I'm talking about." And Gerard really wished they had the motivation to get up and slap their brother, because at this point, Mikey was just asking for it.

"Fuck off." 

"Yeah, I am, I hear you - listening to you and Frank fuck is not really something I want to do." And before Gerard could possibly even consider arguing against Mikey's statement, Mikey was out the backdoor and long gone in search of Pete Wentz and his big gay crush on Mikey Way.

And Gerard could help but take a moment to consider just how hard it would have been for Pete to admit that he ever had the slightest notion of feelings towards the guy who referred to such feelings shared in confidence (well, a drunken kiss, but if Pete hadn't been drunk it would have most definitely been the former) as nothing more than 'a big gay crush'.

Mikey didn't make sense, and Gerard just couldn't quite manage to understand how he'd gone from being the most supportive little brother ever to the kind of person that uses the phrase 'gay friend' and considers someone's sexuality the most important thing about them, but maybe, just maybe, Mikey was a little confused too. But then again, he was a teenager - what teenager wasn't?

-

To say that Gerard was nervous would be nothing more than an understatement, because Mikey was right and this really was it: it was either acceptance on Frank's part or acceptance on Gerard's part - that being the acceptance that Frank Iero was nothing more than the world's biggest asshole and just generally someone that Gerard should ensure that they had absolutely nothing to do with.

They hadn't been quite sure as to how they should have dressed, after all, Gerard wasn't stupid - or at least they claimed so, and no matter if they really did want to, they weren't about to dress up in a miniskirt and a shit ton of make up and make nothing more obvious than the fact that they were Gee all along.

Gerard had opted for a feminine baggy tank top kind of thing that Lindsey had actually left at Gerard's house a few weeks ago, and a pair of really tight jeans: it was feminine and they felt comfortable in it, but it didn't absolutely scream 'Gerard Way is your ex-girlfriend who wore the miniskirts', which was definitely working in their favour.

But before they could really over-assess their clothing choice and truly regret their decision to agree to this fucked up kind of date thing that would end up meaning so much more than it ever deserved to, the doorbell was ringing, and Gerard's heart was pounding right out of their chest.

And really, this wasn't even the hardest part.

"Hey." Frank was the first to speak, blushing like hell, and raising his eyebrows just a little as he took in Gerard's appearance. "Are those girls' clothes?"

"Yeah." Gerard stuttered out a response blushing like hell. "I want to wear them, and, yeah, there's something important I really have to tell you, Frank."

"Is this a marriage proposal?" Frank asked, winking just a little. "Because if so, then by what you're wearing, you can definitely wear the dress."

"Mikey promised me he'd beat you up if you were an asshole to me about this." Gerard added, gesturing for Frank to come in, with nothing more than a warning glance. "Just shut the fuck up, it's not funny."

"Okay...? I was joking, Gerard. You know that? I'm an asshole. I thought you were well aware of that when you agreed to this date-" Gerard gave up at this point, grabbing Frank by the arm and dragging him inside. "I can't see Mikey beating me up anyway - he's skinny as fuck."

"Yeah, and you're like three foot so shut the fuck up." Gerard giggled a little as they led Frank into the living room, sitting down on the sofa opposite the sixteen year old, who was just a little confused, and generally just struggling to guess what this 'important thing that Gerard had to tell him about was', and god, Frank hated being wrong.

"So what is this? Just tell me the important thing - not knowing's making me nervous and I hate it." Frank admitted, blushing a little as he pulled his knees up to his chest. "Sorry about the clothes thing as well... I... you look cute- no, fuck, you look really good, and there's something else, but I just can't lay my finger on it."

Gerard smiled: a fucking genuine smile, and dear god, they were cursed in the fact that it had to be in consequence of Frank Iero's actions. "Frank, this is like a serious, important thing, okay?" Frank nodded, biting down on his bottom lip, and dear god, that was not helping Gerard keep focused at all.

"I-I-I... gender identity... my gender- I... I'm not male, Frank, I'm not female either... I... I'm non-binary, if you know what that means and I would like it if you accept me and use they/them pronouns." Gerard's voice practically turned into a squeak at the end, as the words came out all too fast. "I'm sorry- I... I'm just uncomfortable as a guy, I'm not a guy, please don't call me he."

Silence.

Silence for far too long: Frank was thinking, and Frank's head was spinning.

"Okay." Frank sighed out, looking up to meet Gerard's gaze, but then suddenly something clicked, and god, it had taken months, but Frank had gotten there eventually. "Fuck- I... fuck, Gerard- I... Gee... what the fuck? You're... you're... Gee... you- what the fuck, Gerard?"

"Fuck..." Gerard sighed out, their voice trailing off as they pulled their gaze away. "It was a stupid fucking idea and I hate it and I was just hoping you wouldn't find out-"

"Fuck my life- I cheated on you with yourself- fucking fuck - no wonder you hated me!" Frank exclaimed, his eyes widening as he began to back away a little. "God... I- I... I don't want to think, Gerard... I... holy fuck... you in that miniskirt, that's all I'm thinking about right now, because holy fuck- I just... why did you have to lie to me?"

"Because I thought you were straight and I was in love with you and you saw me walking home from theatre that one day and I- I knew that was the only way you'd love me and it was fucking stupid and who I am and how I dress is just far much more than to impress or get you to fall in love with me, you know that, don't you?"

"God, I just don't know what to think because this kind of... this like solves all my problems because I'm in love with both Gee and Gerard, but fuck- I... you lied to me-"

"And so did you! Every fucking day you cheated on me and probably on many more occasions here, just don't try to act like the victim here because you're nothing more than the world's biggest asshole, got it?" And then before Gerard really knew what they were doing, they were shouting at the sixteen year old, and really, this wasn't going to go down in history as the best date ever, by a long shot.

"This is a date, Gerard, this is supposed to be a date and now you're screaming at me, look, I don't even care if you get your fucking brother to bitchslap me because I'm just going to look him in the eyes and tell him that 'hey, Gerard, yeah? Don't listen to them, they're a fucking hypocritical asshole'."

"Them... they're..." Gerard trailed out, their response, slow and stuttered. "Fuck, I thought you were going to call me 'he'."

"No, Gerard, I'm not, because you're wrong, and in fact, just maybe, just maybe I'm not the world's biggest asshole. Also the whole completely fucking up your life just to get my attention thing is kind of flattering actually - it does wonders for my ego-"

"Shut the fuck up."

And Frank didn't even need to try, because Gerard did a pretty good job of preoccupying Frank's lips by themself.

-

hey guys:) frank finally found out hey, but the emotional trauma isn't over, of course, it's never over, i wrote it - what do you expect?:') votes and comments would be lovely and i love you all<3