Here's a chapter that I both completely half-assed and just decided to make on the spot. Enjoy.

*****

The I.M.P. workers were in the Hell supermarket buying ammo as well as stuff for Noir for his forging. Linc walked by some Walkie-Talkies and a thought came to his head.

Linc: What if the person who named Walkie-Talkies, named everything?

Blitzo: Pregnancy tests would be Maybe Babies.

Loona: Socks would be Feetie Heaties.

Millie: Forks would be Stabby Grabbies.

Blitzo: Defibrillators would be Heartie Starties.

Loona: Nightmares would be Dreamy Screamies.

Millie: Stamps would be Lickie Stickies.

Moxxie: (rubbing his temples) None of you should be allowed to name things.

*****

Loona and Linc are playing a board game they found while waiting for their parents to get back. 

 Linc: "Hearing things, the lip reading game. From Hallbro."

Loona puts on the earmuffs and Linc draws a card. 

Linc: "Everybody needs to calm down." 

Loona: "Everybody likes to f**k now!"

Linc: *laughing*

Loona: *her turn* "Bread pudding is the best bread thing."

Linc: "Bright D**k is my favorite thing."

Loona just lost her shit hearing that being said.

Linc: "the baby fell asleep this morning."

Loona: "The baby f**ked something!"

Linc just laughed.

Loona: "The teacher drew a square."

Linc: "This is where you die!"

*****

During a borning day. The I.M.P. were having lunch.

Mayberry: I haven't been in hell long, are there any laws broken here in Hell?

Moxxie: To be honest, nothing comes to mind.

Blitzo: This is Hell, after all. All's fair!

Millie: You can get away with pretty much anything.

Linc: What about what happened on 10th Street?

Loona: (covers Linc's mouth) We don't talk about what happened on 10th Street.

*****

It was a Tuesday and Linc was watching the news while Mayberry and Loona were.

Lincoln: Someone tried to fight a squid at the aquarium today!

The door was suddenly kicked and Blitzo walks in covered with ink, with Moxxie and Millie following after him.

Blitzo: Well, maybe the squid was being a dick.

Millie: This is why I didn't want to take you to the aquarium.

Moxxie: We didn't take him. He followed us!

*****

Loona was watching a video online until Moxxie walked in holding a pack of rice cakes.

Loona: Hey fatass, whatcha got there?

Moxxie: Blitzo ate my lunch and gave me these rice cakes. Told me this is a really good way to start your diet. (glares at Loona) I know you're behind this.

Loona smiled and returned to 

Moxxie: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! (clutching his throat) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Seeing Moxxie's very violent reaction, Loona got up from her chair and gave Moxxie the Heimlich maneuver until he puked the rice cake.

Moxxie: Ah...! Ack...! (vomits a second time) WHO COULD THINK OF SUCH A HORRIBLE THING?!

Loona, out of sheer immense curiosity, picked up a rice cake and took a single little nibble of it.

Blitzo: We're back and-

Blitzo sees Moxxie giving Loona the Heimlich maneuver as she was crying and trying to puke up the tiny piece of the rice cake.

Blitzo: LOONIE!!!

*****

In the meeting, Blitzo was explaining a plan.

Blitzo: So what do you all think?

Everyone: Huh?

Blitzo: How did none of you hear what I just said?

Loona: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.

Millie: I got distracted about halfway through. 

Linc: My nose was itchy and I lost focus.

Moxxie: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

*****

It was an average day at the I.M.P., however, Linc was teaching Loona how to be nice to people.

Linc: Okay, politeness lesson number one. You see someone drop their wallet. Dad, drop the wallet. (Moxxie tosses it on the ground) Now, what do you do?

Loona: Excuse me, sir, but I do believe you've dropped your wallet.

Moxxie: Doesn't look familiar to me.

Loona: What? I just saw you drop it. Here.

Moxxie: Nope, it's not mine.

Loona: It is yours. I am trying to be a good person and return it to you.

Moxxie: Return what to who?

Loona: [facepalms, then shows Moxxie his ID] Are you the Imp, Moxxie?

Moxxie: Yup.

Loona: And this is your ID.

Moxxie: Yup.

Loona: I found this ID in this wallet. And if that's the case, this must be your wallet.

Moxxie: That makes sense to me.

Loona: Then take it.

Moxxie: It's not my wallet.

Loona: YOU'RE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE!!!!

Linc intervenes before Loona can attempt to maul Moxxie.

Linc: Dad, not helping!

Moxxie: I can see that.

*****

Linc walked into the office to see, Loona had her leg in a cast.

Linc: What happened to Loona's leg?

Moxxie: She decided to go shopping on the day of extermination.

Linc: WHAT?!?!?!

Loona: I was out of shit!!! It'll heal in no time! (moves her leg leg too much) Fuck that hurts...!

Moxxie: "I'll be quick," she said. Fucking moron.

Linc: Did you even get anything?

Loona: In fact, I did! (takes out a package of unlabeled drugs) Helps numb the pain.

Linc: Ugh...

*****

It was November and at the I.M.P. building. Linc walked in with a confused look

Linc: Loona. I just walked by a bunch of guys doing some kind of 'event' in November. What is it?

Loona: Uh... No Nut November?

Linc: That's it.

Moxxie walked into the room, coming from a board meeting with

Loona: What about it?

Linc: I was wondering if you could explain it to me.

Moxxie: Explain what?

Linc: No Nut November.

Loona: Well, it's when you go the entire month of November without-

Moxxie: Eating any nuts.

Loona: Huh?

Moxxie: You go all of November without eating nuts of any kind.

Linc: That's it?

Moxxie: Yep.

Linc: Why do people make such a big deal out of it?

Moxxie: Uh... It's surprisingly hard to go an entire month without nuts.

Loona: Wooo! That's for sure!

Moxxie: (not even looking at Loona) Ssshaddup!

Linc: Uh-huh... (shrugs) If you say so.

Linc goes into the kitchen and Loona snorts as she holds in a laugh.

Moxxie: (shoots a glare at Loona) I'm punching you later!

Loona: You can try, shortie! You can't even throw a proper punch anyway!

Moxxie walked up to Loona and took out a bolt from the chair she was leaning back in.

Loona: Fuck. You.

Moxxie: No thanks, I don't want syphilis.

*****

Loona sees Moxxie sitting down at his desk across from her.

Loona: Fat ass.

Moxxie: .... No ass.

Loona: YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!

Moxxie: You're angry because it's true!

*****

In the board room of the I.M.P. office. Mayberry was explaining things about the living world.

Mayberry: ... And that was just the politics before I died.

Blitzo: It amuses me greatly that the people still alive seem to be far worse than anyone down here. Humans really are just the worst, aren't they? Hahahaha!

Moxxie: Sir. Everyone in here, besides Linc and Noir, is a serial killer.

Loona: I'm not-

Moxxie: You're an accessory to those killings!

Blitzo: Not now, Mox! I'm gloating!

*****

At Moxxie's and Millie's apartment, Blitzo and Loona were visiting. Loona was using Linc as a pillow.

Blitzo: Hey, Mox! Why do they call it oven when you ove-in the cold food of out hot eat the food?

Moxxie: ..... 

Linc: ... What?

Loona: ... Excuse you?

Millie: Did anybody catch what he said?

Moxxie: Sir....

Blitzo: Yeah?

Moxxie: (readying his wires) I'm going to kill you...

Blitzo: ... Start running?

Moxxie: Mmhmm, start running.

*****

It was morning in Hell. Blitzo suddenly kicks open the front door of his apartment building.

Blitzo: Good morning, beautiful people. Ugly bitches go back to sleep!

*****

Linc grabs the fourth wall and Blitzo glares passed it.

Blitzo: Listen here you fuck heads! Do you see this?

Blitzo: This is my little girl! I see what you fuckers are doing online! None of you are good enough for her! You leave her to me and Linc to take care of! (calmly) Thanks for holding that damn thing still.

Linc: Did I have to be blindfolded when you guys looked up Loona's name without SafeSearch?

Millie: Trust me, sweetie. You'd be scared by what you see.

Moxxie: (from the other room) WHY IS THERE SO MUCH PORN OF ME AND LOONA?!?!?!

Millie: Dammit, his PTSD is triggering again.

Mayberry: (from the other room) I got it!

*SMACK!!!*

Moxxie: (from the other room) Thank you I needed that.

*****

At the Goetia Manor, Stella and Stolas were walking silently by Octavia's room when she heard the voices of the two Hellhounds with Imp's parents. This was one of the reasons Stella wasn't yelling, she yells and she'd find a cube on her head.

Octavia: (from behind the door) Are you sure it's gonna fit?

Linc: (from behind the door) Of course don't you trust me?

Octavia: (from behind the door) I mean... Yeah? It just looks like it's going to be a little tight!

The two avian demons immediately began wondering what in the "Here" was going on in "There".

Loona: (from behind the door) Oh shut up and turn around. 

The two avian parents listen in for some kind of noise after a moment of silence.

Octavia: (from behind the door) Heeag-! Too Tight! Too Tight!

Linc: (from behind the door) Sorry! Sorry!

Stella: (opens the door) The fuck is going on in... here?

The two avian demons walked in to find Linc putting on a choker on Octavia with Loona holding several others.

Loona: ... I was letting Via try on one of my chokers. She wants to get one of her own.

Linc: I'm just helping put them on.

Stolas: Oh, uh... All right then...

Octavia: What did you think we were doing?

Stella: (pinching the bridge of her nose) I don't know that's why I came in here and asked...!

Loona: Did you guys think we were-

Stolas: No!

Linc: You two are really sick-minded.

Stella: What!?

Loona: You assume we're doing "that" so you just barge in here?!

Octavia: (covering her face in embarrassment) What is wrong with you two!?

Stolas: Nothing, Via! That's not what happened!

Octavia: (lifting her face from her hands) I'm your daughter, you nasty-minded- (puts her face back in her hands) Ugh!

Stella: Everyone Shut Up! (tired) Stolas! I'm going to drink myself till I forget about this... Go fuck that Imp or whatever, I don't care...

Stolas: (sighs) With pleasure...

The two parents leave, but not before closing the door. Void could be heard letting out a muffled snicker from under Octavia's covers, before bursting out and letting out a hefty laugh, followed swiftly by the others. Blitzo, Moxxie, and Millie come out of the closet with cameras and recording devices. 

Linc/Octavia/Loona: Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

Linc: Oh! Oh, my sides hurt!

Millie: That was perfect!

Blitzo: That'll buy you some silence around here for a couple of days.

Octavia: Thank you for helping me fuck with them.

Moxxie: Anytime.

*****

Blitzo was exiting Moxxie and Millie's bedroom after an interrupted sex session. 

Moxxie: I can't believe you snuck into our home again!!

Blitzo: Well, somebody has to cut that hair of yours at night.

Moxxie: Well, who cuts people's hair in the middle of the night?

Blitzo: I do! They call me the Midnight Barber.

Moxxie: Yeah, well that's an infringement of people's liberties. So don't ever be doing that to me.

Blitzo: I DO do it to you.

Moxxie: ...what?

Blitzo: Who d'you think cuts your hair, Einstein?

Moxxie: My hair just doesn't grow very fast

Blitzo: What, you think it stays that length naturally? I'm in

there in the night, styling away.

Moxxie: How dare you do that to me in the night, when I'm oblivious.

Blitzo: I do my best work when you're oblivious. I lean you up against the pillow, and I go at you.

Moxxie: That's perverted!

Blitzo: If I didn't, you'd look like Stig of the Dump.

*****

In a dark bedroom, Moxxie was smoking and released a sigh of relief as 

Moxxie: How was that Millie?

Laying next to him was a completely different Imp Woman.

Imp Woman: My name's not Millie...

Millie: No... But mine is...

The Imp woman turned to see Millie, wearing nothing but a bathrobe, sitting in a chair behind the light cone of a ceiling light.

Millie: Do it again~...

*****

It was a rainy day in Hell, which meant that it was Acid Rain. This also meant phone lines were taken down and Wireless options were shut down to prevent anything from being melted. The I.M.P. office didn't have any work to do, Stolas and Octavia were also there, mainly to not be stuck in the same house as Stella. Linc however had a guitar that Loona bought him.

https://youtu.be/Aj1jW_dfGac

A/N: Just the audio from this.

Linc began strumming away.

Linc: ♫Oh is it a crime? To give me the time?♫

Mrs. Mayberry joined in by tapping on several mugs of various fullness with a pencil.

Linc: ♫It's tricky to process every emotion, every sign.♫

Loona began tapping her claws on her desk in rhythm. Octavia also joined in by clapping her hands.

Linc: ♫How I feel is irrelevant, all of the same, praying for weather that isn't just rainclouds. I'm face down in the dirt.♫

Noir pulled out a bass guitar and a drum set that Blitzo and Moxxie began to play. Stolas then joined in Linc's singing.

Linc & Stolas: ♫You were lucky to have me around, bet a milli you missed all the sounds.♫

Millie joined in with an acoustic guitar.

Linc & Stolas: ♫My heart makes when I'm out of love.♫

Everyone continued to play in harmony as Linc and Stolas sang.

Linc & Stolas: ♫Do you slumber now I'm out of town, hid a couple of deafening sounds. My heart makes when I'm out of love.♫

Everyone stopped playing.

Linc: ♫When I'm out of love.♫

Millie: Damn, sweetpea, where'd you learn to sing like that?

Linc: Just winged it really.

Loona: Another thing you're oddly good at.

Octavia: He's a jack of all trades.

Void let out a gurgled laugh.

Stolas: "Damn right he is." Huh, you were right Blitzy. You do just learn what Void is saying over time.

Moxxie: Millie you never told me you could play an acoustic guitar.

Millie: You never told me you could play the drums.

Stolas looked outside to see the Acid Rain had stopped

Stolas: Looks like we're free to leave. Shall we?

There was a moment of silence.

Linc: ... And a 1. And a 2. And a 3.

The group resumed playing their instruments.

*****

That's all for now, feel free to suggest ideas for more random moments in this for another chapter of random moments. Bye.