6/24/17

8:35 PM

Dear Peanuts,

They don't serve peanuts on airplanes anymore

It's pretzels and cookies now

Because people are allergic

But If you ran the airlines and you liked peanuts you wouldn't care at all what allergies people might have and there would be so many peanuts that people would be going into anaphylactic shock every other flight but it wouldn't faze you

You're two.

I think.

Daddy are we getting on any more airplanes?

No, this is all.

Are we there?

Yes, we're there. But we'll have to drive to the house. That'll be another two hours.

Did we bring the car?

No, we'll have to get one. Would you like to do that? Get a car?

Yes! Can we get a minivan? I like minivans.

You said something, something defending how wonderful minivans were that, having driven around in a minivan most of my life, I was quite anxious to hear, but I missed it.

Yes, we can get a minivan.

Yay!

So, we'll get the minivan and then -- 

Wait!

What?

What if they don't have minivans?

Then we won't have a minivan.

At which point you began to cry

LOUD SUDDEN JARRING WAILS THAT MADE PEOPLE LOOK BEHIND THEM AND IN FRONT OF THEM AND TO THEIR LEFT TO SEE IF YOU HAD BEEN HURT AND THEN TO SEND ACCUSING GLARES AT YOUR FATHER.

Oh, honey, don't do that. People don't like that. You have to be quiet.

I think he tickled you, or something, because you sulked for a second longer and then you

g i g g l e d , a  s w e e t  l i t t l e  b a b y  g i g g l e  t h a t  m a d e  m e  s m i l e 

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!

Ah, I won.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!

Wow, again?

Grr. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!

Gosh, I'm winning every time!

Which is when every child grows bored of the game.

Daddy, I have to pee. 

Okay, you have to hold it until we get off the airplane, alright?

How long?

Maybe ten to fifteen minutes.

People had already begun to get off the plane, but I was five rows from the back and you were four. 

Why can't I go here?

The airplane doesn't have bathrooms.

A lie, but a practical one.

Well, why can't I just go right here?

No, no, no, absolutely not. 

After that, you fell quiet. I got off the plane and wondered what you looked like (I hadn't turned to look)

But we saw you again after we left the gate and reached the escalator

You were tapping your foot against the moving platforms, snatching it back

Just in time

                    So you weren't

Sucked

             Away

And your dad called your name and said Get back here!

And I smiled and left.

                                Your Fellow Traveller,

                                                                    Never

(P.S: If you ever read this,  I hope you got your minivan)