013

— let me be your sickening desire —

THE NIGHT WAS DARK, ALMOST PITCH BLACK BUT THE LIGHTS HANGING AROUND THE BAR MADE IT SPARKLE. Pirates and patterns laughed drunkenly and chatted the night away, some waiters even joining in to hear their great stories. And like a lot of the others present, Oaklyn and Usopp had definitely had more than they needed to drink. But it didn't really matter in the moment, Visenya and Nami were too busy getting another round for themselves.

But in truth Visenya couldn't shake the blonde waiter from her mind, her mind still cloudy with confusion. It was terribly confusing and exciting. She had never thought about anyone in that strange way, and it was exciting, even if she had no idea what it meant. "I need to ask you something," Visenya spoke up quickly, catching Nami's attention. "But you can not tell anyone else."

Nami swallowed hard, "Why do you sound so serious?"

"What does it mean? Boyfriend?" Visenya asked, keeping her voice quiet. "Are Zoro, Luffy and Usopp not also boy-friends?"

Nami looked as if she wanted to laugh, but when she looked up at Visenya she paused. She stared at Visenya for a moment, to begin with to check if she was joking, and then her eyes swelled with sadness. "You've never had a life, have you?"

Nami's question struck Visenya to her core and her eyes darted away. Did she really sound that stupid? "I have to find Luffy," Visenya said, grabbing her drink as soon as it hit the bar top and trying to slip away but Nami quickly grabbed her hand.

"I just. . ." Nami cut herself off and slowly let go of Visenya's hand. "I mean it's sad that you don't know what love is," Nami whispered.

"I know what love is," Visenya snapped, but her eyes quickly darted away. "I just don't know that love."

The bartender called for her and Nami grabbed her drink, taking a deep breath as she did. Once she turned back to Visenya she smiled. "Usopp is Kaya's boyfriend, she is his girlfriend," Nami said cautiously, carefully picking her words.

Nami couldn't see it under the darker bar lights, but Visenya's cheeks had turned red in embarrassment and her eyes widened to stare at Nami. "Is that why they kissed like that? That's what Oaklyn—" Visenya cut herself off and as someone rudely leaned between, she slipped away leaving Nami dumbfounded.

Nami huffed and walked back to the others, slipping again into her spot beside Oaklyn. Oaklyn was sipping away at some sparkling fruit drink, pieces of dragon fruit scattered through the ice, a large smile on her face as she watched Usopp chug another drink far quicker than he should be.

"Pace yourself," Zoro scolded as he reached for his drink.

"I don't even think there's liquor in this," Usopp defended himself, but his voice already sounded quite tipsy. "It tastes just like candy."

"Last time I said that I woke up face down under a table," Zoro countered, the sudden confession making Oaklyn laugh. Zoro glanced at Nami from the corner of his eye, but he didn't turn to her, "That glass have gold on the bottom or what?"

Nami looked up, glancing between Zoro and Oaklyn. "Hmm?"

Zoro shrugged ever so slightly, "You haven't stopped staring at it."

Nami took a deep breath, slowly swirling the liquor in the glass. "You seriously don't think what Luffy did is messed up?" she asked, her eyes darting around.

Oaklyn looked down at her own drink and shrugged. "Some people have reasons, to keep their secrets," Oaklyn reasoned, although she kept her voice low as if she were unsure of her own words. "Maybe Luffy had a good reason."

"He should've told us," Zoro argued, but he didn't change the way he spoke. "But in case you didn't notice, we've been making enemies everywhere we go. Psycho clowns, killer butlers. What's a vice-admiral gonna do to us?"

"No, you don't get it," Nami said, shaking her head quickly. "I can't get caught. Not when I'm so close—" Nami glanced at Oaklyn and when she saw the confusion in her face. She quickly closed her mouth and set the near empty glass on the table between them and Zoro. "Uh, who's ready for another drink? My treat."

Zoro hummed softly and nodded, "Mmm. My favourite kind of drink."

Oaklyn watched Nami stand and walked into the crowd, making a beeline to the bar. Oaklyn sipped on her fizzy drink, tapping her nails against the table impatiently. Zoro glanced over his shoulder at Nami, but he just let out a sigh and looked at Oaklyn. "If you finish your drink, you have a reason to chase her," Zoro mumbled, bringing his beer to his lips.

Oaklyn glanced at him for a moment, debating on whether or not to slap him, but instead she downed her drink and jumped her feet, quickly following Nami's path through the crowd. She nervously tapped her nails against the glass, trying to keep her nerves to a minimum as she crept up behind Nami, but what she heard made her freeze.

She was talking to an older man. . . about passage out.

"Need room for your friends too?"

Nami hesitated but ultimately shook her head, "No. Just me."

"I'm at slip 22. Be ready to sail at dawn."

The man stood and quickly left, leaving Nami alone at the bar. And Oaklyn couldn't stop the words from leaving her mouth, "You're leaving?" Nami spun and Oaklyn saw her turn a pale ghost white in shock. She stammered over her words, unable to find the right excuse and in the end, she spun to the bar and quickly downed half her drink.

Oaklyn could feel her heart beginning to race, feeling strangely sad about the thought of Nami leaving. Part of her joining her and others on their journey to the grand line had been the promise of seeing Nami and building their. . . it wasn't exactly a friendship, and they certainly didn't hate each other.

All she knew was she liked it, she liked Nami, and she wanted her to stay. But her want wouldn't be enough, she had barely known Nami, why would her wants mean anything.

Nami took her drink and turned to face Oaklyn, the colour returning to her cheeks. However, before Nami could say anything, Oaklyn beat her to it, "Do you wanna dance?" Nami stammered at Oaklyn's question, again. So, Oaklyn explained a little further, "I like this song, and I've never danced with anyone before."

"So what?" Nami asked, a smile growing. "You think your dream is to be a dancer, but you've never danced?"

"With anyone," Oaklyn corrected, stepping forward and taking the drink from Nami's hands. She quickly finished the drink and set it on the end of the table with her old glass. "So. . . do you wanna dance Nami?"

Oaklyn held her hand out and after Nami took another breath, she took her hand with a smile, "Lead the way."

◈

Visenya pushed the side door open to the kitchen, only a small handful of busy chefs were working away, but they were slowly starting to leave, letting Visenya step in without anyone noticing. She walked around the long counters, setting her drink down as she continued toward the sink and the large pile of dishes Luffy was working away at. She walked to his side, but he didn't seem to notice her.

"Luffy—"

Luffy jumped in surprise, the sudden call of his name making him so scared he almost dropped and broke the plate. A poor chef that had also been working nearby jumped in surprise, nearly dropping everything they had been working on.

Visenya turned to Luffy and apologised as he caught his breath, it made her laugh softly. Luffy went to brush it off, but something clicked in his mind. "Oh! Wait, just—" He quickly dried his hands off before Luffy put his hands on arms, "Do not move."

Visenya furrowed her eyebrows in confusion as Luffy rushed off, finding whatever had sparked his interest. Visenya stood still, looking at the pile of dirty dishes that seemed unfathomable, if it truly was like this every day they would be stuck there forever. Luffy rushed back to Visenya, holding up a plate of the most delicious piece of smelling tuna. "Sanji made this—"

"I thought he was a waiter?" Visenya questioned, her eyebrows furrowing.

"No, maybe? I don't know. He's a very good cook! Try!" Luffy shoved the plate into Vsenya's hands, and before she could protest Luffy splashed his hands back into the soapy dish water as he searched for the plate. Visenya sighed softly and looked down at the meal, her stomach rumbling softly. Maybe she had not eaten enough for dinner.

She set the plate on the counter and quickly took her gloves off, putting them in her pocket. She was not ruining her gloves; she had just stolen them. Visenya picked the fish up with her fingers and bit into it, the flavours exploding in her mouth. It was absolutely delicious. She quickly finished off the rest of the meal, almost eating like Luffy as she devoured it.

Luffy grinned at her, "I know right!"

Visenya set the empty plate on the top of the other dishes but that's when she realised what Luffy had just done. He had saved her food, his food. She took a deep breath and pulled her jacket off, tossing it aside. She rolled her leaves up, exposing the small scars along her skin but underneath the soapy water neither she nor Luffy would see them.

Visenya gently pushed Luffy along, making room for her to stand at the sink. She grabbed a dishrag and started to help him clean the dishes, no matter how much it was his mess. Luffy protested the same, but Visenya shook her head, "A crew should help their captain."

Luffy laughed softly and they continued to wash the dishes, possibly making progress when the final chef set another large stack down. He didn't even acknowledge either of them as he turned as walked out the door. Luffy threw up his hands as he watched his walk away, but Visenya never stopped. "He didn't even say hello!" Luffy complained.

"They won't," Visenya said with a shrug, setting a dish aside to dry. "They think we are beneath them."

Luffy looked up at her, his eyebrows furrowing slightly, "Did someone make you feel like that?"

Visenya took a deep breath, nervously chewing on her lips. "Someone who was meant to protect me," she said softly. "I had this family; he was meant to look after us but instead he used us for our abilities."

Luffy had stopped washing dishes, instead staring at Visenya. "Is that how the Cat Pirate knew you?"

Visenya's hands faltered, and she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath as her mind began to race wildly. "I did bad things, Luffy. That man he, what I did to get away. . ." Visenya's hand gripped the side of the sink to keep herself steady, "I know it's part of you to see the best in people. But I—"

"Visenya," he said softly, and she turned to look at him with wide eyes. "You're here because you're a good person. You saved my life." He shrugged softly and grinned at Visenya, not a single lie in his voice. It made her smile. "But whatever you did before, if you think you need to make up for it. I will help you."

Visenya was speechless, she couldn't even find the right words to thank him because thanking him wasn't nearly enough. Her heart bounded in her chest and in her nervousness, she grabbed a rag and wiped her hands trying to distract herself enough to get her mind to focus and find her words. As soon as she put it down Luffy snatched it up and dried his hands off before pulling Visenya into a hug.

She froze for a moment, her mind scrambling again, but then she wrapped her arms around Luffy and hugged him. For the first time for as long as she could remember, she felt safe. Visenya squeezed Luffy in her arms. Then he suddenly jumped back, but his grin was still there. "You can smile, and hug!" Visenya laughed softly and shook her head. "You can laugh too?"

The sudden sound of the door swinging open to the empty kitchen made their heads turn, and Visenya's throat dried out as she saw Sanji walk in. He had left his jacket somewhere and rolled up the sleeves of his striped shirt exposing his skin. It made her push down the sleeves of her own shirt as she stared, again. When Visenya looked up at him she realised he had paused in the door, eyebrows creased in confusion as he stared at her. "You do know you're not meant to be back here, right?" Sanji ended his question with a laugh that made Visenya sheepishly smile.

He grinned at Visenya and shrugged softly, "Guess I can make an exception for the prettiest girl Baratie has ever seen." Visenya had to turn away, that feeling of embarrassment and excitement taking over once again. Sanji let out another soft laugh as he moved to sit at a small wooden table in the corner. 

The sound if dishes being cleaned made Sanji's head turn and he called out to Luffy, "Hey, chore boy, how's that dish pile coming along?"

Luffy sighed and shook his head, "Never seems to get any smaller."

Sanji began to flick his lighter on and off as he chuckled softly. "The old man's a real piece of work," Sanji scoffed, but the softness in his voice didn't exactly make Visenya believe him. "Bet you regret giving him that IOU."

Visenya's head whipped to face Luffy, the shock clear on her face. "You wrote I owe you?" Visenya question in utter disbelief.

Luffy shrugged softly and glanced over his shoulder. "I don't really do regret," Luffy said honestly. "No point in looking back."

"Lucky you," Sanji said solemnly. He slowly spun the golden lighter between his fingers, watching the lights reflect in the metal as he were distracted by something closer to a deep dream. "Sometimes, when I try to look ahead, all I see is back."

"Stop looking," Visenya advised with a soft voice, turning to look at Sanji. Sanji's eyebrows furrowed and Visenya turned to him, taking a step closer. "You are looking for something that doesn't exist yet. No wonder all you can see is your own disappointment. Stop looking, start observing." Sanji started up at Visenya, that shine in his eyes growing. Visenya tilted her head, "How long have you been a waiter?"

"I'm not a waiter. I'm a cook. Best one in the East Blue," Sanji's voice was stern as he argued against Visenya. She raised her eyebrow and Sanji took a breath, smiling up at her again. "Not that it matters. As long as the old man's in charge, I'm banned from the line."

"But that meal you cooked was incredible," Luffy spoke up and Visenya couldn't help but nod in agreement.

"The True Bluefin Sauté?" Sanji questioned, his smile growing.

"Yeah!" Luffy shouted in excitement.

"You tried it?"

"Yeah, of course I did," Luffy said, nodding quickly making his way to Visenya who found her glass of liquor again. "I couldn't help myself. Well, enough to save Visenya a piece—"

"Visenya?" Just hearing Sanji say her name made her head spin and her eyes quickly snapped toward him, trying not to look like a dumbfounded deer. He looked up at her, his eyes wandered hers and it made her heartbeat faster. "Sorry I just, I hadn't learnt your name yet." Sanji leaned back in his chair and smiled at her with the same charm he greeted her with. "You liked the dish, Visenya?"

Visenya smiled and sipped on her whisky, "I knew the food was going to be good, but I was quite impressed. You are a very good cook." Sanji waved her off, shaking his head softly.

"You are," Luffy said in agreement. "Why is Zeff making you wait tables?"

"'Cause he's jealous," Sanji snapped, the anger from earlier quickly returning. "I should be running this place, but the old man's so stubborn, it'll never happen."

Luffy leaned on the counter beside Visenya smiling at Sanji with his wondrous smile. "So that's your dream. To be head chef of the Baratie." Sanji shook his head softly, mumbling a small nah. Luffy furrowed his eyebrows but slowly nodded, "So you love to cook. You just don't want to cook here?"

Sanji took a deep breath and grabbed a small golden case. He clicked a small button along the side, and it opened up revealing the cigarettes inside. He popped one out and brought it to his chapped pink lips and silver rings. How had she not noticed the rings on his fingers, and was that metal in his tongue? Visenya blinked quickly as Sanji lit the cigarette, the sound of the metal lighter failing to spark shaking her from her thoughts.

With a curse, Sanji got the lighter to work and inhaled the tobacco. "There's, um, this place. . ." Sanji let out a long breath, the smoke floating behind him to an open window. "Where you can find ingredients from all four seas. East Blue, West Blue, North, and South. They call it the All Blue. Nobody knows where it is, but. . . there's fish there that have never been seen." Sanji smiled; his face filled with pure joy as he recounted the tale. "You know, rare seaweeds. Spices that have never been tasted."

"It is a cook's paradise, and I'm gonna find it one day," Sanji looked up at Luffy and Visenya, the joy in his face replaced by pure determination. He nodded softly and lifted the cigarette to his lips. "That's my dream."

And while Sanji's face had changed, Luffy's had not, his wonder only growing with every word Sanji spoke. "If you want to cook, you should cook," Luffy insisted, and while his wonder was there, his smile was understanding. "Don't let some stubborn old man get in the way of your dream." He glanced at Visenya and smiled. "Stand up to him. Tell him what you want."

Sanji's smile faded and he ran his tongue over his teeth, "It's more. . . complicated than that."

"I don't really do complicated either," Luffy confessed, and it made Sanji smile.

Visenya sighed softly, was she really that disappointed Sanji might not join them? "Do you not have dishes to clean?" Visenya asked, casting a look at Luffy that made him turn back and make his way to the dish pile. Visenya walked over to Sanji and sat across from him, sipping from her drink as a final push to down her nerves.

"And what honour have I earned to have you sit with me?" Sanji teased, but something in his voice wasn't that teasing.

Visenya smiled softly and pushed the glass closer to Sanji, as she took the lighter from his grip. Sanji didn't protest, watching her closely as her fingers danced across the shiny metal and while it looked like nonsense to him, she fixed the loose piece his lighter. She checked it was working before twirling it between her fingers. She held it out to Sanji, and he gladly took it with an impressed smile, letting his fingers run over hers, "A true angel."

Visenya felt her cheeks burn but she kept her eyes forward, "You can thank me with a cigarette." Sanji hummed with a smile and took another cigarette from the case, holding it out to her. She took it and set it between her lips, but she let Sanji light the end, even if she was too nervous to meet his piercing gaze.

He snapped the lighter closed and Visenya leaned back in her seat, breathing in the smoke. "If you do not leave here soon, you will not leave here at all," Visenya said, letting the smoke fall from her mouth. Sanji's eyes darted away for a moment, but Visenya kept her gaze serious. "You know I am right."

Sanji didn't say anything, but he did take the glass of whisky sitting between them and took a sip. The liquor hit his tongue and Sanji whistled through his teeth, his face scrunching slightly as the fiery taste. Visenya laughed softly and Sanji found himself joining her. "Whisky girl," he said with a small cough, but he covered it up with a chuckle.

Visenya took the glass back and sipped it, "For the burn." Sanji raised an eyebrow, but Visenya let her eyes wander over the empty kitchen. All the talk of food and flavours had made her hungry, and just the thought of Sanji's cooking made her want to melt. She had definitely not eaten enough for dinner, but it felt so wrong. Niles had given her barely enough food to live, and just enough food to make her strong when he needed. You will eat less than you desire, and more than you deserve.

But now, she could buy her own food and eat as much as she wanted. At least she would start thinking that way.

She tapped the ash of the cigarette in the same small tray Sanji did and looked up at him. "You would know when the next service is, yes?" Visenya asked, asking with the small confidence she had before it vanished again.

Sanji furrowed his eyebrows, "Are you hungry?"

Visenya quickly cast her eyes down and brought her arms closer to her body, the confidence vanishing as quick as it came. "No. I just. . . need to know when to leave," Visenya mumbled an excuse that she could see he didn't quite believe. "I am not supposed to be here remember?" Sanji tilted his head sceptically, but after glancing at Luffy he quickly snuffed his cigarette out and stood, walking towards one of the kitchen stations. "Wait— what are you doing?"

"How's some Beef Stroganoff?" Sanji offered, reaching into the cupboard. "Shouldn't take too long."

Visenya stammered slightly, her eyes wide in shock, "I do not know what that is."

Sanji grinned and nodded to himself. "All the more reason—"

The doors swung open, a man with dark skin, blue hair and a chef's apron tied around his waist walking through "What do you think you're doing?" he questioned with furrowed brows, his voice demanding as he walked towards Sanji.

"The lady's hungry," Sanji said with a shrug. "At Baratie, everyone eats."

"Who's gonna pay for that?" the man argued. "This is a business. We can't give handouts—"

"I can pay," Visenya spoke up quickly. "It won't be a handout."

Sanji looked as if he wanted to argue with her, but he quickly focussed on the argument he was already having. "I will pay," Sanji insisted, his eyes moving between the two. Sanji turned back to the other man and narrowed his eyes, "If a lady is hungry, I feed her."

"Zeff kicked you off the line."

"I don't see the old man here. Do you?" Sanji shook his head softly and continued to gather and prepare everything he needed.

The other chef shook his head and threw his hands up as he stormed out again, "Your funeral."

As soon as the man was gone, Visenya stumped out the finished cigarette and jumped to her feet, walking to Sanji's side. "You have to let me pay," Visenya pleaded.

Sanji shook his head and looked down at Visenya, "Only if it's good, you can pay afterwards."

Visenya shook her head, "All the more reason to pay you now." Sanji however just shook his head and continued to prepare her a meal. "Sanji," Visenya called. He looked down at her once again and Visenya finally realised how close she was standing, close enough to feel his body heat. She took a breath and met his eyes, "Thank you."

— lethal lust —