A/N: You say lobster, and I say mermaid scorpion

Five years ago in America. Paul McCartney is 20 years old.

"Oh yer so tight darling. Tighter than yer mum." Paul groaned in pleasure.

The girl's pink lips were parted, squeaky moans slipping from them. She wrapped her thin legs around Paul's waist as he thrusted faster.

"Paulie! Oh gosh!" She gasped when Paul's calloused hands squeezed her small breasts. A strange feeling rose in her gut. Paul felt his own orgasm creep nearer, and knew that she was close as well.

"Baby doll I'm so close..." He was just about to come, until a blood-curdling shriek echoed through the room.

"PAUL MCCARTNEY! WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO MY DAUGHTER?!"

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"Elsie! I'm home!" Paul called out as he opened the door. The clicking sound of her high heels came down the hall in her wake.

"Have a good first day love?" She asked. Paul pecked her sweetly on the lips and smiled.

"Great, but I am feeling a bit peckish. What's for tea?"

"I made tomato soup and grilled cheese for tonight. I need to get more groceries tomorrow, we're running low on a bit of everything."

"Sounds delicious." Paul gave his girlfriend a short hug before walking into the living room to drop off his stuff. After plopping his bag on the couch, Paul straightened up. Only to nearly fall over after feeling something, or someone, bump into him.

"Oh crap. S-sorry Paul." He turned around to see a sheepish-looking Richard wearing nothing but flamboyantly-colored socks, boxers, and a white button-up shirt. Apparently he had been sliding around the house and accidentally rammed into Paul. Trying not to stare at his bare legs, he chuckled lightly (pretending to himself that what he did just hours before didn't happen) and tousled Ritchie's hair.

"'S alright Ritchie." He rolled his eyes with a lopsided, heartbreaking, smile as he fixed his quiff.

"Alright you two. Soup's on."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ritchie, stop slurping. It's rude." Richard looked up from his spoon an uttered a small 'Sorry mum'. He lapped up the red soup on his lips and Paul occupied his mouth with his sandwich hide the groan that could escape.

"Mum, I forgot to tell you that Gear asked me if I was free to hang out Saturday."

"After the drag race I assume?"

"Yeah, so can I?" Elsie pursed her lips in thought, considering her son.

"I don't know..."

"Please?" He put on his best puppydog eyes and Paul nearly choked on his soup.

"Oh alright. But remember that curfew is 8."

"Not a problem." Richard stood up with his empty bowl to put it in the sink, kissing his mother's cheek on the way.

'Don't look at his arse. Don't look at his arse. Don't look at his... fuck' Paul chanted in his head. Ritchie slid out from the kitchen on his socks, earning a, motherly, eye roll from Elsie.

"Put some trousers on why don't you. Paul's moving in you know." The teen glided across the floor and onto the couch.

"Then he'll have to learn to deal with my no-trousers-after-six-while-at-home-policy." Richard covered his face with a magazine and Paul let go of a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"Well, can you at least read in your room. I have to talk to Paul for a moment."

"What?" Paul blinked.

"Okay mum." He obediently went to his bedroom, leaving the two to talk.

"Paul."

"Yes love?" He tried not to sound nervous.

"You seem a bit... off today."

"H-how do you mean?"

"You've just been acting a bit strangely. Are you alright?" Genuine concern in her voice. Paul swallowed the lump in his throat and quickly thought of an answer.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a bit stressed after the first day back." He chuckled lightly. Elsie's smile went from sweet to lustful in seconds as she made her way to Paul's chair.

"I think I can fix that."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Richard couldn't sleep. Not when he could hear his mother and mother's boyfriend fucking in the other room. He tried to cover his ears with the pillow, which did jack to muffle the unexplainable sounds from his mother's bedroom. Ritchie groaned and rolled off the bed, determined to make a point. The teen wasn't a particularly bitter person, except when it came to anything sleep-related. He was about to knock on the half-open door until he heard a familiar voice.

"Oh Elsie, mmmmhmgod." Paul's moaning was followed by his mother's as Ritchie poked his head between the door and the doorframe. Paul threw his head back on the headboard and tightened his grip on Elsie's hips. He watched in awe how Paul's lips parted to allow low, orgasmic sounds spill from them. Richard realized his pants felt just a bit to tight when a pair of doe, hazel eyes met his. He gasped and quickly retreated down the hall to the bathroom. Panting with fear, and lust, he leaned against the door. He closed his eyes and ran a hand over his painfully hard member. Richard hissed slightly as he guided his finger inside him, pumping in and out slowly.

"Fuck, Paul..." He groaned as he curled his finger to reach his spot. With his other hand Richard covered his mouth to muffle the pleasureful sounds slipping from it. Waves of pleasure washed over him as he imagined something a lot harder than his finger thrusting inside him. Richard didn't realize his hand slipped away as he collapsed to his knees on the cold tiles. "Oh my god. Harder, yesss."

"Did you hear something Paul?" Elsie's out-of-breath voice asked. Ritchie's eyes shot open and he quickly pulled out his finger.

"Uhm... No, probably just the neighbors. Come back to bed." Said Paul's voice. Richard went ghostly pale as he realized he was fingering himself to his probably-soon-to-be-stepdad. He quickly pulled is pants back up and crept to his room. Curling up in his bed, Ritchie lay awake and thinking.

'That was wrong' He thought.

'But I liked it...'

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A/N: Lewk, is hte beebles

I feel like this needed appreciation.

Where were we? Oh yeah

What a fuccin shitty way to end the chapter dickass

Shit's getting reel or somfin'

-Moose xoxo