The moment Charizard got hit by the pillow, everything seemed to freeze. For a brief second, there was silence—complete silence. The kind of silence you get when a bomb’s about to drop, and in my case, it was about to drop on my sanity.

Then... I lost it.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I screamed, my voice reaching an ear-shattering pitch that surely could be heard from Pallet Town. It wasn’t a mere scream. It was a battle cry, a cry of existential horror. The kind of cry only someone facing Red himself would make.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!” I wailed, running in circles like a hyperactive tornado of pure chaos. "I'M BATTLING RED?!"

Bruno, who had only just recovered from his brush with death via dumbbell, looked at me with wide eyes. "Mia, calm down!"

I didn’t listen. No, this was Red, THE Red. The legendary trainer. The one who had single-handedly made it to the Pokémon League and beyond. And now, I was supposed to fight him, with my sleepy Snorlax, a pillow, and a bunch of very annoyed adults behind me.

“DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!” I screamed at Lance, who was still trying to catch his breath from laughing. “DO YOU?! I’M DOOMED!”

Red, still silent as ever, watched me in his usual calm manner. He wasn’t phased. Charizard wasn’t phased. Pikachu was just chilling on his shoulder like it was no big deal.

"Red's not even fazed," I muttered, realizing the vast, crushing weight of my situation. "He’s just standing there, looking like a freaking legend! Meanwhile, I—I—am here, screaming like a madwoman in front of everyone!"

"Maybe you should try taking a deep breath?" Greta suggested, looking far too amused for my liking.

“DEEP BREATH?!” I shrieked, suddenly standing still in the middle of my frenzied running. “I CAN'T BREATHE! I’M DROWNING IN MY OWN PANIC!”

At this point, even Lorelei couldn't hold back a snicker, her hand covering her mouth to stifle the laugh that was clearly bubbling up. Bruno groaned, clearly regretting the entire sequence of events.

“Alright, that’s enough,” Lance said, wiping his tears of laughter away. “Let’s focus. Mia, you can do this. Just... you know, try not to throw anything at anyone else. Bruno looks like he’s had enough for one day.”

I took a deep, trembling breath and stared at Red. His silent, piercing gaze seemed to say, "You’ve got this... or not." Either way, I was facing a literal legend.

"Okay," I muttered, slumping my shoulders. “Okay, Mia. You can handle this. You just need to be strategic.”

Before I could finish psyching myself up, I noticed Red subtly motioning to Charizard to take to the air.

"WAIT!" I screamed, flailing my arms. "I’M NOT READY, WAIT!"

But it was too late. Charizard was already airborne, and I barely had time to react before—

BOOM!

Charizard unleashed a massive Flamethrower that sent me flying backwards. I crashed into the wall like a ragdoll, and I swear I saw stars.

Bruno shouted something, probably about not getting caught in the crossfire, but I didn’t hear him. The only thing I could focus on was the searing heat of Charizard's attack and the fact that—oh yeah—I was battling Red.

“Red!” I yelled, finally pulling myself together, though I still felt a bit dazed. “I am not losing to you! You think you can intimidate me with your legendary status?! HAH!”

Red raised an eyebrow at me, clearly unfazed, while Pikachu gave a slight, almost amused, “Pika!”

I stumbled to my feet, still shaken. "Alright, Charizard, let’s see how you like this!"

I looked around, desperate for anything I could throw at Charizard this time. My gaze landed on a nearby potted plant.

"HA!" I yelled, throwing it in the air. "YOU'RE NOT GETTING OUT OF THIS, CHARIZARD!"

Charizard swiftly dodged the plant, but the plant did hit Bruno square in the face. Again.

“WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME?!” Bruno screamed, brushing leaves off his face.

“Just stay down, Bruno,” I muttered, feeling both guilty and somewhat proud of my chaotic impact.

Lorelei was crying with laughter at this point, clutching her stomach. “I can’t even... Mia, you’re a force of nature!”

I grinned despite myself. "No one said it was going to be easy, Lorelei!"

And then... just as the battle was about to continue, I heard the most magical words ever.

“Red,” I shouted, pointing at him dramatically, "If I win this battle, you have to—"

Red held up a hand, as if to stop me, and then signaled for Charizard to use another Flamethrower. I swear, he had no mercy.

This time, I dove behind a bench just as the flames whipped past me, and I could hear Red’s Pikachu laughing. It was at that moment I realized: this battle was going to be long... and very, very loud.

I stood there, panting, my body still buzzing from the sheer chaos of the battle. The heat from Charizard's Flamethrower still hung in the air like an unwanted reminder of my near-death experience. But then, in the most ridiculous twist of fate, something snapped inside me. I had had enough.

“Okay,” I said, my voice dangerously calm, “if this is how it’s going to be…”

In one swift motion, I launched myself at Red. “TIME TO GO FLYING!” I yelled, my adrenaline-fueled brain making some very questionable decisions.

Before Red could even blink, I grabbed him by his jacket collar and, with every ounce of strength my 8-year-old body could muster, I yeeted him across the room. Yes, I yeeted my legendary, mute, older brother. Who, mind you, was still holding his precious Pikachu and looking utterly unfazed by my complete lack of boundaries.

“WOOOOOO!” I screamed as I hurled him. His Charizard, naturally, followed, wings flapping dramatically, its fiery breath lighting up the room in the process. Pikachu, caught in the whirlwind of confusion, was not too happy about this sudden change in direction.

“Pikachu!” the little electric mouse squeaked as it found itself airborne, desperately clinging to Red’s cap.

THWACK!

Red’s hat flew off his head and landed on the opposite side of the room, where Bruno, somehow in the line of fire, ducked just in time to avoid it. Unfortunately, this was the same moment I spotted a potted plant. With my newfound power of “Yeeting” absolutely everything I could get my hands on, I whipped it across the room.

“HA!” I shouted, throwing the plant with the precision of a seasoned athlete. It smacked right into Charizard’s tail, making him flap in surprise.

“CHARIZARD! WATCH IT!” Lance shouted, but it was no use. My “chaotic energy” had taken on a life of its own. I was an unstoppable force of nature at this point. No one, no one, was safe.

I proceeded to pick up anything I could find. Chairs? Yeeted. Books? Yeeted. Bruno? Yeeted into the air like a poor, unsuspecting volleyball.

“MIA!” Bruno shouted, flailing in midair. “I’M NOT A TOY!”

“YOU’RE A CUSHION NOW, BRUNO!” I yelled back, completely unfazed by the fact that I was now throwing humans around like I had superpowers.

Even Lorelei and Greta were laughing so hard that they couldn’t help but clutch each other for support.

“Red,” I said, still laughing manically, “you and your Charizard are nothing compared to me when I’ve reached peak chaos. I’ll throw everything! And anyone! You hear me?!”

Red, however, looked unfazed. Pikachu even gave a cheeky little "Pika!" as if to mock me. Red might have been a mute legend, but his eyes were saying, “You can’t beat me. Not like this.”

I could feel the madness in my chest, the rush of... something wild, as I surveyed the room. Nothing was safe. Not even my poor brother and his once-pristine hat.

It was pure pandemonium.

“Well,” I said, grinning as I picked up a broom next, “this is fun.”

And with that, I swung the broom at Charizard, who dodged effortlessly. But my true goal was not Charizard. No, no. I aimed it at Red’s shirt sleeve, yanking it as I flung him into yet another wall.

The whole room had erupted into laughter and complete chaos. Charizard tried to stabilize mid-air, but Red? Well, Red was just taking it all in stride. Still completely silent. His cap was now on the floor beside Bruno.

Meanwhile, my poor brother was probably wondering if he’d ever been through anything so weird in his entire life.

“Okay, okay,” I said, finally catching my breath, “I’ll admit, maybe I went a bit too far.”

The room slowly started to calm down.

Bruno, however, had a different perspective.

“You think?” he said, his voice dry as he stood up, brushing dirt and leaves off his shirt. “You yeeted me. Into a wall.”

“Sorry, Bruno,” I said casually, then turned back to Red, who was still silently processing everything. “But you know what? I think I’ve got this. Red’s just too quiet for me to handle.”

Red finally cracked a smile. A tiny smile, but it was enough.

I guess my chaotic nature was good for one thing. It finally broke through his stone-cold exterior.

I had to pause for a second. I looked up at Red, who was standing there, still stiff as a board, probably wondering if he was hallucinating. I hugged him so tightly, I could feel his heart racing—though that was probably just his panic setting in.

"Red," I said with the most serious tone I could muster, "go get me my baby bottle, I’m thirsty!"

At first, I thought he might laugh. But nope. He was looking at me with sheer horror—his mute expression telling me all I needed to know. Red, my once-legendary, battle-hardened, silent older brother, was now frozen in utter confusion.

“Red?” I asked, blinking up at him innocently. “You’re going to get it, right? I want the milk, and I want it now.”

He actually took a step back, his eyes wide, like I’d just asked him to perform some impossible feat. His Pikachu, perched on his shoulder, looked equally confused, letting out a little "Pika?" as if it was trying to process the situation.

“Come on, Red!” I added, squeezing him even tighter. “You are my big brother, right? Big brothers do things for their little sisters!”

I don’t think Red knew what to do. His mouth was open, probably trying to say something, but—oh right—he was mute. So, all he could do was stand there, stiff as a board, while I continued to hug him like a maniac.

Then, without missing a beat, I planted a huge kiss on his cheek, fully smothering him with my wild energy. “Oh, Red, I missed you sooo much! It’s been forever since we did sibling things, like this!”

And in case that wasn’t awkward enough, I started ranting. “I mean, seriously, why do I have to battle you anyway? You’re the best, but I’m the bestest! So why do I always have to prove myself against people like you? Also, when’s the last time you’ve eaten? Have you been sleeping well, Red? You look tired. Oh, wait, you never show emotion, so maybe that’s just your thing, huh?”

I was on a roll, talking a mile a minute. Red was looking at me like he had absolutely no idea what was going on. His cheeks were pink—not from any feeling but more like he was a deer caught in headlights, unsure if he should laugh, cry, or just bolt.

Finally, after what felt like forever, Red managed to break out of his silent, horrified trance. He cleared his throat awkwardly, still unable to say anything, but it was clear: Red had forgotten how to be a big brother in this scenario.

I pulled back slightly, giving him a knowing smile. "Don’t worry, Red. I promise I won’t actually make you go fetch me a bottle. But you know what? I could use a snack. A brother-shaped snack. You could totally be a snack if you get me a sandwich, right?"

Pikachu, in the background, let out a little chuckle, clearly enjoying my unrelenting weirdness.

Red looked like he might burst into flames from embarrassment. But, hey, I had no idea how to handle a legendary trainer like him without just being myself—completely absurd and unapologetically chaotic.

"Well," I said, bouncing up and down on my toes, "that was fun! Maybe next time, you can be slightly less horrified at my sisterly love, okay?”

Red gave the faintest smile, finally managing a small nod, as if to say, “I have no idea how to process this, but at least I’ve survived another one of Mia’s weird moments.”

And in the end, that’s just how it went—chaotic, silly, and entirely unpredictable. Just like me.

I couldn’t stop myself. The adrenaline rush was still coursing through me, and before Red could even process my “yeeting” spree, I lunged at him, wrapping my arms around his neck in a hug so tight it probably restricted his airflow.

“REDDDDD!” I screamed, squeezing him so hard I’m pretty sure I heard a faint “CRACK” from his spine. “I’VE MISSED YOU!”

Red didn’t even flinch. Not because he was calm. No. It was because he looked utterly terrified. He stood there, stiff as a board, eyes wide like I had turned into some kind of wild, untamable beast.

But it wasn’t enough. Oh no. The chaos had only just begun.

“MOMMMMMYYYYYYY!” I wailed, suddenly thinking of milk. Yeah, my brain had completely turned to mush by this point, but it didn’t matter. “RED, I WANT MY BABY BOTTLE!”

I pulled away just slightly to give him a wild-eyed stare. “Get me my milk. I’ve got things to do. Gotta hydrate, you know?”

Red’s jaw dropped. His eyes widened even further, if that was even possible. His mind raced, trying to process the madness unfolding. His mute self couldn't even utter a single word in response, and honestly, I’m not sure he even wanted to.

“Red! I need it now!” I pouted, crossing my arms in full brat mode, completely forgetting that I was eight years old. It wasn’t my fault I was under a hyperactive spell.

And then, before he could do anything—or even properly react—I kissed his cheek. Twice.

Red was so horrified that I think he genuinely forgot how to breathe. The poor guy just stood there, rooted to the spot, blinking rapidly. Pikachu was still perched on his shoulder, looking thoroughly done with the situation, its little ears drooping as if it, too, had lost hope for its beloved trainer.

I wasn’t paying attention to any of this, though. Oh no, I had an entire speech prepared. A passionate, frantic, and completely nonsensical rant that I now felt compelled to deliver.

“LIKE, WHO PUTS A LEGENDARY TRAINER AGAINST AN EIGHT-YEAR-OLD?!” I screeched, still clutching Red like a teddy bear. “THIS IS CRAZY! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE, RED! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! I’M GOING TO DESTROY EVERYTHING, AND THEN WHAT? YOU’LL HAVE TO FIX IT ALL AGAIN, WON’T YOU?!”

I was on a roll. I didn’t even stop to breathe.

“And ALSO, I’m hungry, and I swear if there’s no candy left in this dojo, I’m going to burn it all down! WHY DOES EVERYONE EXPECT ME TO BE RESPONSIBLE ALL THE TIME?! I’M JUST A LITTLE GIRL WHO WANTS HER MILK, WHY DOES THAT HAVE TO BE SO HARD?!”

Red just stood there, his face still frozen in the most horrified expression I’d ever seen. His eyes were darting around the room as if he was silently pleading for someone, anyone, to rescue him from the nightmare that was his sister.

Pikachu, seeing his chance, finally decided to intervene. The little electric mouse zapped me lightly with a tiny bolt of electricity.

“Pika!” Pikachu squeaked, trying to snap me out of my wild rant.

I blinked and stopped mid-sentence. “OW! Hey, what was that for?” I turned to the little mouse. "I was giving a very important speech, thank you very much!"

Red, now freed from my tight grip, took a small step back, looking relieved that I had stopped babbling. But he still had that shell-shocked expression on his face.

Lorelei, Bruno, and Greta all stood in the background, absolutely losing it. Bruno was practically gasping for air, while Greta just looked at me like I was a disaster in the making. Lorelei, meanwhile, was trying and failing to stifle her laughter.

“I think Red needs a serious break from you,” Lorelei managed to say, wiping away tears from her eyes. “Poor guy’s never going to recover.”

I looked at Red, finally noticing the deep level of panic in his eyes.

“Okay, okay, I get it!” I said, backing off and holding up my hands in surrender. “But, um, you could still get me that milk? Just a suggestion...”

Red, in all his mute glory, seemed to regain some composure. He sighed, and I swear I saw a tiny bit of a smile tug at the corner of his lips before he swiftly turned and walked out of the room, undoubtedly to get away from the absolute whirlwind that was his little sister.

“Well,” I said, sitting back down, “I guess he’ll be back later… to not give me milk, right?”

Everyone else, still laughing, nodded in agreement.

And I—well, I was ready to keep wreaking havoc. Just another typical day with Mia.