You could see Alecs vein at his neck pumping the blood through it in a fast speed as his eyes were glued on the envelope and his head was having a fight with his heart. His heart yelled at him to talk with Magnus and telling him about it before opening it while his head shouted to open it now. Alec got mad as he realized how strong his head was right now and how weak his heart was. Shouldn't he choose Magnus? "Damn it." Alecs mind was too messy in that moment of a second and without thinking about any consequences he ripped the envelope open. Everyone made mistakes and so did Alec but of all the wrong choices he made this would be proved to be the worst. Alec felt a cold shiver running down his back and the whole time he was slightly shaking but the want of getting answers was stronger than any fear. He felt sick in his stomach when he read the first words in this empty and cold voice William had.
{Dear Alec,
If you ask yourself why I wrote a letter it is because you probably want me to. I have no idea and honestly I don't care about when and how you find this letter but I hope you do. If you think you will find an apology between all these lines I have to disappoint you because there isn't a world I would ever apologize for what I did to you. I did what I did and I don't regret it now or then. You want to know why you? Because you looked really great and I'm actually a bit upset we had to take the rough way but you chose. Just think about it...what happened is only one persons fault...yours. You broke up with me and that was the consequences of it. Your actions ruined everything we two had and now you have to deal with it. You wanna know why I did what I did? Because I could and you let me. You were so naive thinking that a guy like me would date someone like you and you fell for me so easily. It was almost too easy and actually really funny to see how you fell for me more with each minute that passed. You can hate me now but don't think I am the most terrible person on earth because that would be dumb to believe. I showed you my real face pretty fast but there are people out there playing better and you will meet them. Did you meet someone again? Did you meet someone who doesn't care about your flaws and tells you they love you? Don't let yourself get fooled twice. People will always see you as one thing and that is a toy. You're dirty...and used maybe not from the outside but from the inside. No one will ever really love you and the ones who say they do will always want only the one thing I already got. Don't be so dumb and think there is someone out there who really loves you. Don't be as dumb as you were when you fell for me.
~In Love and Hate William}
Tears were falling down on the letter and the air were filled with sobs. Alec felt like there was a hand around his throat that got tighter and tighter with every breath he took. But he didn't even want to breath because the air felt like it was fire and burned the inside of his throat that was so painful that it almost made Alec cry out. Nothing in that letter was an answer Alec hoped to get and it only made the pain that was set deep down in his chest break out. It was like someone cut with a knife down his chest and let him bleed out while his body was shaking violently. Alec crumpled the letter up in anger and threw it on the ground before he got up from the bed. His legs were barely caring him and his view was blurry from the tears that filled his eyes faster than they could fall. Alec walked to the opposite wall and out of desperation he punched with his hand against the wall while a heartbreaking scream left his mouth. The pain in his hand when it hit the wall was hurting almost as much as the pain in his head and Alec punched the wall again. Again and again you could hear the dull noise of Alecs hand hitting the wall until a spot of plot painted the wall. The blood didn't make Alec stop tho and in the hope of being able to replace mental pain with physical pain he punched the wall with his fist like it was a punching bag. "Alec? Al... Alec stop!" Jace heard the shouting of his brother and as he entered the room he was met by a horrible scene. Blood was on the wall and running down Alecs hand who didn't even hear Jace and just kept punching. Jace didn't know what to do but he had to stop his brother from hurting himself and he wrapped his arms around him from behind. "No... LET GO OF ME... LET ME GO." Alec tried with his whole strenght to get out of Jace strong grip but Jace was stronger and pulled him back from the wall as fare as possible. "What the hell are you doing?" Jace asked with a concerned look on his face his eyes fixed on Alecs bloody hand and Alec stared at him. Alec looked directly into Jaces eyes and Jace quivered when he saw how lifeless Alecs eyes were. Jace could only remember one time the eyes of his brother held that type of emptiness and his heart was beating in fear. "He won...William won." Alec mumbled before he sunk down the wall his eyes gluing on the bloody spot on the opposite wall and it felt like the whole earth stopped to turn. William won... //tbc The angat in his full glorious 😭😭😭😭😭😨😨😨