"Can we just start? I want to be with him when he wakes up?" Alec said really impatiently when neither of the two men spoke and Mark sighed. "I'm sure Magnus told you about our past  and how I ruined my own life." Jadon said his voice holding bitterness but a weak smile tugged on his lips and Alec nodded. "He did tell me about the drugs." Alec answered crossing his arms over his chest and Jadon took a deep breath. "My addiction was more expensive than I could earn. I started to borrow money so I could buy new stuff and I made some mistakes. I borrowed money that I could never give back." Jadon didn't go really into details because the most important parts were the only necessary ones and a small frown covered Alecs forehead. "I borrowed money from a really bad man and he wanted more than I even got. In the end the price was my own life and it could have been way worse." Jadon sounded really composed but Alec could see the regrett in his eyes. "This man threatened to kill me and the ones I love. Luckily he had no idea who I really way but it would have only been a matter of time until he found out. That was the first time I was thankful for being so unpopulare." Jadon needed to take a few breaks between the parts of the story and Alec let him take them. "One night the CSY stood in front of my door and gave me the chance to make a deal with them. They were trying to get this man since god knows how long and with me they had a chance." The next part seemed to be something Jadon really struggled with and Alec could see how his eyes became glassy but he didn't really care. "I called the man and told him I have all the money he wants. So we set a date where we planned to meet but the day came and he never showed up. All I remembered was that I got shot from a fare distance and I woke up in the hospital. That was when the CSY realized it is too dangerous." Jadon placed a hand on his stomach like it hurt but Alec figured out that was the spot where he got shot. A scare was probably left and it didn't hurt but it hurt mentaly. "To protect the people I love I had to give up everything. To protect the most important people I had to leave them. I went through surgerys to chance my look and we erased everything that could bring me in connection with the Jadon Magnus used to know." Jadons voice was full with guilt but it also sounded like a part of him didn't regrett what he did and Alec understood it. "Since no one really knew me anymore besides Magnus  and the goal of this man was my death...we had to make him believe he got what he wanted." Jadon felt like he could let out a breath he was holding way too long and Alec needed a few seconds to process this crazy story. "I went to a rehab clinc...I got clean and found a job that made me happy. A few days ago the CSY came to me and told me that it is over and that they got the guy. I didn't want to come back in Magnus life...I wanted him to move on but he is...was my best friend and having the chance to see him again was a dream." Jadon couldn't even look at Alec because he was too ashamed of how bad he messed up his own life and how he messed up with his best friend. "Why did you never asked for my help?" Suddenly Magnus voice filled the room and everyone looked at the door where he was standing. To say Magnus looked terrible was an understatment but neither could say what he thought right now. "I couldn't...you did so much for me in the past. But that was a war I had to win on my own." Jadon answered and Alec wanted to walk to Magnus but something in him stopped him. "Leave..." Magnus breathed out and looked with an unreadable expression at Jadon who bit his lip. "Magnus, just let me exp..." "I said leave." Magnus cut Jadon off with a firm voice but it was calm and in some ways that scared Alec. "I hope you can forgive me one day." Jadon said with sadness in his voice when he passed Magnus who didn't care to give him another look. "Now to you. Why did you never tell me about that?" Magnus asked looking at Mark who suck in a deep breath and shook his head. "It's my job to protect you. The only way that was possible was to let you believe he is dead." Mark answered and Alec knew Mark felt bad for having to lie at him like that all the time but he got it. "Lying like that isn't your job." Magnus spat out and Alec knew he was really hurt but he decided to stay quiet for now. "You wouldn't have stopped to asked questions. Maybe you would have promised to not see Jadon again but after some time you would break that promise. His death was the only way to protect you." Mark knew he really hurt Magnus with this betrayal but he also knew Magnus would get over it and he just needed time. "Pack all your stuff. You are on leave until your pension starts." Magnus voice was clear and Mark didn't think about starting an argument. "I hope you understand why we did that." Mark said shaking his head lightly and left Alec with Magnus in the room. Alec and Magnus stood there for a few minutes and Alecs eyes  were fixed on Magnus while Magnus looked with an empty gaze out of the big window. Alec was scared as hell that Magnus would kick him out too and push him away but he had to try. Alec slowly walked closer to Magnus and he saw how tears sparkled in Magnus eyes. "Magnus." Alec asked his voice was really soft and Magnus head snapped to him a little frightened because he didn't hear Alec coming closer. Magnus looked at Alec for a few seconds but he didn't dare to open his mouth scared his voice would break. Alec saw the helpless look in Magnus eyes and he wrapped his arms around Magnus hugging him tightly to his body. It took exactly two seconds for Magnus to hug him back and it took him another two seconds until he broke down in tears but Alec kept him together...//tbc I know it's sad and I'm sorry guys but it will get better soon...probably💞💞💕💕💕💕💞💞💞💕💙💙💙💙💙