The cold December breeze rushed past Taehyung as he stood at the entrance of his tiny newscasting company. Like okay, he loved the cold weather. Had been waiting for it for a long time but now that it was actually here, did it have to be this fucking cold. And his failure to be organized earlier this morning (every morning) came to bite him back in the ass with the gloves he'd forgotten on the dresser. Stuffing his hands in his coat pockets just wasn't enough you see.

Never mind though, Yoongi was going to be here soon and he'd make sure make up for the warmth he lacked now with the heater in said hyung's car. 

He was actually supposed to go out with Jimin to do some last-minute shopping for the holidays. Taehyung had put this off long enough and only yesterday did he realize he had literally one present for Jeongguk. A watch. A single piece of metal. That's it! They didn't take Christmas very seriously and all but it was the surroundings of where they were that had pressured him into falling into the custom of buying presents during this holiday. But it's fine, buying gifts for the people you love was fun and receiving them was an even greater joy. 

Besides, Jeongguk had been acting strange for the past week so maybe a gift would help a bit. It felt like he was tip-toeing around Taehyung, being even more gentle and caring. This was all good although Jeongguk was behaving very different from how he usually was. Now Taehyung wanted to say that this had something to do with what happened the other night after their drive but-

"Taehyung." A voice suddenly piped up next to him, also scaring him in the process. 

Taehyung turned to the side to find Ki-woo there buried underneath a huge coat given how big the coat was and how tiny he was. Man, almost all their encounters started with Taehyung reliving the scare of his life before the actual conversation started. 

"Hey... Ki-woo." He managed a small smile.

"How are you? It's been ages since we last talked." Ki-woo displayed that forced smile again. "I take it you've been busy these days."

He was a little late to answer, having analyzed the other's expression in utter wonder as to why it felt like Ki-woo's face and words always seemed so artificial. Was he being paid to interact with Taehyung or something? "Oh yeah, I guess I am." He curly replied after.

The other man chuckled before smiling again. "Any plans for the holiday?"

"Yeah... I'm-"

"You probably have a lot of friends to spend it with." Ki-woo said a little too fast before he quickly backed up with, "I mean... I'm just assuming. You seemed quite popular back at that Halloween party."

It took Taehyung exactly five seconds to recall Jimin inviting his co-workers to that darn party and his brief awkward encounter with this man at said party. Hmm... awkward. Just like this one was. Seriously, was Taehyung's life ever gonna be free from these uncomfortable situations he kept being put in. 

Getting back to the conversation, instead of saying that he wasn't very popular and it was a mere miracle that he ended up with the great friends he had now but come on... was Ki-woo really close enough for him to be this casual with. It was clear now that this man gave him the creeps (also, where the heck was Yoongi?!)

"Haha, I guess it did seem that way." Taehyung simply shrugged, his cheeks hurting from how much he'd been forcing that smile added with the cold weather, every part of him froze to its core.

Then Ki-woo took a step closer. "Have you heard that they're looking for a reporter in the late night segment over at Sunday News?" He asked which had Taehyung shaking his head.

Sunday News was this huge news corporation that ran the media world. Famous in this country and also owned a bunch of those high profiled Korean newspapers. Another thing that they're known for is having insanely good-looking news anchors. Yeah, that's how they rolled. And to Taehyung, he'd honestly never considered applying for a job there because seriously, there'd be hundred others there with more experience and a richer background than him.

Why delay the disappointed when he could avoid it from the start right?

"I'm applying for it." Ki-woo suddenly said, bringing Taehyung's attention back on him. "I mean, you've been doing so well what with getting to work with Mr Seo and all... figured I should aim for something great too." He explained with yet another fake smile at the end.

"That's... great?" Taehyung answered, finding it hard to add any enthusiasm into his words. Oh god! Save him from this awkwardness!

"So are you planning on-" The shorter man began again but his words were cut off by a deep voice cutting into their conversation.

Yoongi appeared right behind Taehyung. "Hey, you ready?" He asked to the man in question though his eyes were set in a sharp glare at Ki-woo. Yoongi wasn't the type of person that liked to waste time so with an arm slung around Taehyung's shoulder he turned them both around and began walking in the opposite direction, putting an early and much needed end to their conversation with no goodbyes. 

Once they were a good few meters away from the other, Yoongi dropped his arm and turned to face Taehyung next to him. "Who was that?" 

"Just a co-worker." Taehyung noticed the elder's brows drawn together in almost an intimidating stance and smiled. Genuinely this time. "Why? What's with that face?" He chuckled.

Yoongi shook his head, turning to the front. "Nothing. He just seemed to be making you uncomfortable."

A groan left him. "Ugh, I know. It's awkward every time we talk."

When Yoongi didn't say anything further, Taehyung's thoughts spiraled to one other person- the person that was supposed to be here instead of this hyung. 

"How's Jimin by the way?" He queried with concern lacing his tone. It's no secret that his best friend had been MIA for the past week. The last time they talked was at that café when Jimin was sulking at his boyfriend's constant absence. It was really a shock to him that Yoongi was free for once as a substitute for Jimin today. "He hasn't been answering my calls lately so I'm just..." He dragged on, looking to the other for an answer.

There wasn't an instant reply and Yoongi actually looked conflicted with that question. His face said it all; things clearly weren't fine in the couple's relationship. And seeing as how Jimin hadn't called him yet with some kind of Tae! He said it back! He said he loves me! with a followed up invite to Let's go out tonight and celebrate! It's obvious that he hadn't confessed yet which currently had Taehyung staring at the elder.

If he could read minds, he'd waste no time in digging through Yoongi's thoughts right now. Was it really that hard for some people? To utter that one phrase. Three words. Eight letters. Taehyung was in no place to interfere with their relationship but it was difficult to see them both like this. And he couldn't be mad at Yoongi for putting his friend in a slump like this... god knows Yoongi had his own shit to deal with.

"He's fine. Just been busy with rehearsals lately." Yoongi finally said.

Taehyung nodded.

And that was the end of that conversation.

. . .

At night, Taehyung was alone at home. It was eight something when he called Jeongguk to ask about his whereabouts to which the younger man replied with a brief I'm still in the office here, don't wait up for me and Taehyung groaned after the phone line cut itself.

He wanted to see Jeongguk so badly and was getting more worried by the second. It felt like things were getting back to how they were in the start where his boyfriend returned home late at night and he was oblivious to the reason why. But Jeongguk really seemed honest on the phone so in this case 'work' was the only thing to be blamed here. Ugh...

This loneliness. Taehyung hated it very much. Not because he was alone in the apartment and that shadow above their bed looked like a monster's claw to which he'd embarrassingly admit that he may have screamed a few times in the past due to that but no. The reason he hated being alone was because it gave his brain the advantage to push him over that cliff into a sea of thoughts. 

And it had succeeded in doing so because by eleven, Taehyung was in bed alone. His face squished against a pillow as he thought about the most recent bump in his and Jeongguk's relationship. His hand subtly ran over the now barely visible nail marks over his left shoulder. A sigh left him. This right here. This was the fucking reason.

So okay... this tiny incident happened. Maybe Jeongguk got carried away a little but why was he feeling bad now? Taehyung had forgotten about it even though he's had to look at the scar every day since it happened. It probably seemed weird as he was usually prone to overreact but this didn't really affect him all that much. What was the difference between all the hickeys on his neck with this? In the end, it was the same thing. Everything evolved from pain first. So why?

Why on earth was Jeongguk feeling bad about this?

It was even harder that Taehyung feared the other's reaction if confronted with this issue. But of course he needed to put his fear aside because Jeongguk needed to know that he was fine. Yeah, Jeongguk just needed to know that Taehyung wasn't mentally scarred or affected in any way by what happened the other night. And the only way for him to tell the other that is for Jeongguk to actually get home first. 

For now, it was time to go to bed. Despite Taehyung's usual struggles to get some sleep without the warm presence of Jeongguk being next to him, he'd managed to fall asleep within fifteen minutes. Beyond his closed eyes, everything was calm and dark at first. In a couple of hours, he'd wake up and start a brand new day. That was how he thought it'd go.

But come on, at this point was it even surprising that the universe just wouldn't give him one night to lay his head peacefully. Another dreadful long night was approaching Taehyung as he was graced by the appearance of that same damned dream. Yes. The one in the club; the one where everyone disappears and Jeongguk says those horrid words to him and then the 'touching'. Fuck, this was torture to a human! 

In relation to the constant tossing and turning, Taehyung woke up at two in the morning with beads of sweat damping the sides of his head. His chest rose and fell rapidly in utter mortification. He whipped his head both sides to see Jeongguk nowhere in sight. Upon swallowing thickly, Taehyung kicked the sheets off him moving to sit in an upright position at the side of the bed, feet on the ground. 

His head fell into the palms of his hands as he attempted to calm his breathing. This would be the fourth time he's had this same nightmare. Why honestly? What possible reason could there be for him to be visited by these dreadful trail of events on occasion. 

Taehyung had taken the time to think about it. People have nightmares most often because they've lived through a traumatic experience in life or some other shit but he's had none of that. Well, no experience that could be put in the category of 'trauma' at least. Plus, he's happy now. Happy with Jeongguk so again... why?

A long sigh then left the man as the next step in his usual nightmares occurred right on time: The blinding headache. Pills didn't help as he'd tried it in the past. It was clear that he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight. So much pressure on his head... the ugly feeling of discomfort... the absence of Jeongguk's touch to sooth him... what to do, what to do?

In the next moment, it's no coincidence when Taehyung's eyes drifted over to his bag resting against the closet in an unorganized manner. He looked away, thoughts buffering. I am feeling stressed now right? This... what I'm feeling counts as stress right? He found himself justifying. He thought about how Jeongguk wasn't home at the time.

The vape was sitting quietly in his bag.

Should he?

Taehyung licked over his bottom lip nervously. Oh god, why did it feel like he was being watched right now? The guilt engulfed him way before he was even doing anything yet. His eyes fell over the bag again. 

More thinking.

And then at last... No, Taehyung muttered to himself before turning away and getting back under the sheets. This feeling will go away eventually. It wasn't worth it. With his eyes wide open, no trace of sleep within him, Taehyung decided to wait. 

Wait for the headache to go away.

Wait for that shadow on the ceiling to stop being scary.

Wait for Jeongguk...

To comfort him.