There's a lot of confused emotions floating around inside of me, but one thing for certain is that at the moment, I don't care there's a good chance I will regret this tomorrow. Because to be honest, right now it's where I know I should be. I'm not sure if it's to start all over again from the beginning or if it's to say goodbye, but I know that it's something I want to happen, because more than anything I want to remember him just the way he always was with me, before everything changed.

Harry had shown up at my bedroom window just a few hours after I had walked out of his house this afternoon. And as much as I had wanted to slam the window down on his fingers, I didn't. The look in his eyes alone made me understand that I needed to hear him out despite my stubbornness of not wanting to listen.

I felt as though all he ever did to me, was lie. But his actions told me otherwise. And I always said that with him, actions spoke louder than words, and I have been a hypocrite in all of this. He has been doing nothing but trying to prove to me that Maddy was a mistake. He walked me home from the fair, brought me flowers in the hospital, left me alone when I told him to and made my room feel like home again with his mother. The good, in a way, outweighs that one horrible thing he did to me somehow, and so I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and let him explain to me what it is he came over to say, hoping it would be why Maddy was there and why she knew my secret.

"She doesn't know the truth," he told me. "I lied to her. She thinks you were in the hospital with a bad case of pneumonia."

These words alone made me sit down against the wall beside my window. I didn't want to look at him knowing I was so mad thinking he'd so easily tell Maddy the truth, when in fact, he hid it and made something up on my behalf.

But there was a long silence once I was out of his view through the window. A silence that gave me time to wonder what the truth actually was. I so easily believed his words that moment; that he lied to her. When in reality there are so many reasons to believe that he could be lying to me about what he told her just to make him look better. After all, he did have sex with her and tried to hide it from me, and I still didn't know why she was at his house to begin with.

I leaned back up to look out the window, my elbows on the frame, sitting on my knees, his eyes instantly locking with mine. "Why was she over at your house today?" I bluntly asked. "Does she go to your house regularly? Did you hang out with her the whole time I was in the hospital?" My heart was pounding, hating to ask so many questions that didn't seem to be any of my business, but sometimes a girl has to put aside her pride and ask things she needs to know the answers to—Not to be nosy, but to get passed all of this.

"Today was the only time she came over," he answered. "You just happened to witness it, which doesn't surprise me in the least, lately."

"Why was she there?"

"She came to ask why no one was answering their phones," he explained. "She said everyone just stopped talking to her after graduation and she didn't know why."

I stifled a laugh at the thought of karma finally giving her what she deserves, and I wondered if everyone had found out any of the truth and can finally see the kind of person she actually is. "Why aren't they talking to her?"

"Niall said it's because everyone found out about her blog and didn't like most of what was written in it about them," he explained.

"That's why if you write in a blog, you stay anonymous," I said, rolling my eyes. "These idiots know nothing. So, why was she asking about me?"

"She said she went to your house and no one answered," he told me. "She apparently wanted to apologize for everything, and then asked why you weren't at grad and where you were."

"And that's when you told her I was in the hospital with pneumonia?"

I watched him nod. His eyes didn't break contact with mine with each word he said. He had answered quickly and easily and spoke with a confident tone and there was no doubt in my mind that he was lying in the slightest. "Can I come in now?" he asked.

"All of what you just told me is the truth?" I asked just to double check my doubts.

"I swear it's the truth," he answered, sitting up on his knees, leaning closer to the window. "I swear it on us, Jayde, and you know how much us means to me."

Without answering, I stood up from the window and allowed for him to crawl in. Once again, my heart pounded in his presence and we stared at each other as he stood next to me. "Just to remind you, there is no us right now, so I don't know why you're swearing on that."

"Because to me, there will always be an us," he said quietly, as he moved closer to me. His eyes moved down to my neck where the necklace he had given me lay comfortably against my skin. In a silence he clasped his fingers around the stars and I watched him stare at it as he let out a long sigh. "It will always be you, me and the stars, remember?"

His eyes finally met mine and the heat from his hand on my skin coursed through me. It was a feeling I hadn't felt in much longer than I wanted to go without his touch, and in that moment, I felt alive. "You, me and the stars," I whispered, repeating his words.

"Why are you still wearing this, if you're so mad at me?" he asked in a hushed tone. His closeness to me was very apparent, my entire body wanting to wrap itself around him. His hand moved from my necklace slowly down to my hip to find a comfortable resting place.

My body instantly reacted to his touch, remembering this particular spot on me was his go-to. And this is where I find myself now, unable to find my words to answer him, suddenly lost in his forest green eyes, focusing only on his hand on me and how he looks back at me. My heart feels like it's about to explode in my chest, pounding and racing knowing this distinct look—he wants me. Except he's being cautious and hesitant because he doesn't know how I'm going to react or what I might do if he tries something.

And so I crash my lips with his before there is a chance for the moment to subside, wrapping my arms around his waist to pull him close to me. I may have made plans just a couple hours ago to meet Boy_Undiscovered tomorrow night, but right now, at this very moment, no matter the shit Harry has put me through, I want to believe that this is where I should be. With Harry, in a moment filled with apologies. With understanding that even with everything that's happened, I still love him.

I miss him. And I need this just to move on. To get passed everything. There is nothing worse than knowing that the person who broke you is the only person who can help put you back together, but I want to believe that with this, somehow I will get some answers and know what to do.

I pull him across the room by his t-shirt, stopping at the side of my bed before my lips meet his again. Feeling his arms wrap around me sends shivers to all the right places. Pulling his shirt up over his head makes him stop to look at me and I fear that if words are to come out of either of our mouths, this moment will falter. One of us will say something that will give reason as to why this shouldn't happen and that's the last thing I want right now.

Because I want him. And I want him to want me.

I watch as his eyes flick back and forth between mine, my heart thumping in my ears. He is debating this in his head, fighting with himself, the look on his face worries me. I can't have him think too long about this, I can't let him change his mind. For him, I pull my shirt up over my head and throw it to the floor, hoping this will take his attention away from any negative thoughts he has.

"Jayde," he interrupts my attempt to kiss him. "Maybe we should talk about this first."

"I don't want to talk about anything right now," I say, pressing my lips to his neck. My hands find their way into his hair and my small attack to his neck has made his head fall back as I listen to him breathe out a long sigh of relief with my touch. "Tell me you still want me."

He places his hands on either side of my face, making me look at him. His pupils are dilated and the seriousness in his features are delicious, especially with his hair hanging in his face. "I will never stop wanting you, my Sweet Girl," he says with confidence. His finger slowly slides down the center of my body from my neck to the waistband of my jean shorts, stopping at the button. "I will do everything I can to prove to you every single day of my life, to make sure you know how pretty I think you are, Jayde."

He doesn't give me time to react to his words. My shorts are down to my feet within seconds and I'm laying on my bed awaiting him to join me. I watch as he pulls his pants down before climbing on top of me, a slight smile on his face as he rests himself comfortably between my legs. 

The twinkle lights light up his skin, reminding me of easier times and I allow for that remembrance to take me away with him, to the place I have been missing. Not to the stars, for they are in his eyes, and I instantly feel like I'm home.

And when he kisses me, I have flashbacks to all the times this has felt right. Harry and I have always felt right. It was as if the stars aligned just to bring us together and here they are again, bringing us back to where we belong. In each others arms, wrapped up in all the moments that are ours, surrounded by twinkle lights exactly how it used to be.

"Are you sure about this?" he asks, looking down at me, a few tendrils of hair dangling in his face.

"I just want to be with you, Harry," I answer quietly. "I want to forget everything that's happened for a little while." The look on his face changes as his eyebrows furrow at me and I know exactly what he's thinking. "Not for an escape. I don't want an escape," I immediately assure him. "I worded that wrong. I mean, I do want an escape, I need to forget. But you're my escape."

The passion in the way he kisses me ignites every nerve in my body instantly. His reaction to my words makes it obvious he likes that he could possibly still be my escape. I have missed his skin on mine, the way he grazes his fingertips down my skin and how soft his lips are as he presses them against mine. The sweet taste of mint upon his tongue and the silkiness of his hair through my fingertips. He brings me to a high so fast, I'm afraid I might stop breathing.

And just when I think my heart might explode from its rapid pace, he slides himself into me with his eyes locked on mine, my heart returns to the rhythm I was once very fond of, the beat only he could create.

I can't see anything but him. There's no negative thoughts, no worry that this is wrong. I allow for it to just be him, me and the stars—twinkle lights to be exact, and the feeling of his body moving with mine.

His hand moves from my hip and glides up my body, goosebumps rising in the wake of his gentle touch, his hips not losing his perfect rhythm. I could live for the way he touches me, for he knows just how I like it. No one will ever be able to make me feel the way he does, that much I know for sure.

He cups his hand around my breast, his thumb and finger playing at my nipple, making me let out a small moan of pleasure and he smiles down at me as his hips start to move a little faster, deeper, hitting just the right spot. "God, I have missed the sounds you make," he says before kissing me hard. "I missed you so much."

I force myself to keep my eyes open to see the beauty that's making me feel so good. For he is the sexiest when he's on top of me, fucking me, beads of sweat on his forehead and his curls hanging in his face. I love watching him watch me under him, knowing how good he's making me feel as if it's a thrill for him to see me come undone.

Of all the times we have been together and I never wanted it to end, this time in particular is a time I wish for it to last forever. For him to continue to be in tune with me, to keep our bodies moving fervently together, for him to keep hitting that one most amazing spot, to never stop feeling the way I do now. I want for him to keep his eyes locked with mine, for him to see that in this moment I accept all of his apologies and that I know he is more than sorry and he would take it all back just to keep me forever too.

Our hands meet above my head, lacing our fingers together pressed into the pillow. I have always loved when he held my hands, an act I believe is proof that it was never just about the sex, that somehow it was about the connection between us, a true testament that proved that he always feelings for me. And here he is, connecting us this same way, showing me those feelings are still there.

And I never want to let go.

But just as all good things must come to an end, he kisses me a long sloppy kiss, tightening his grip in my hands as he closes his eyes tight and groans. And although I didn't get to come undone before him this time, that's okay, because I got everything I wanted. And if there was anything I could have ever asked for, it was to have this feeling one last time, because God only knows what might happen next.

A/N: Once again, I'm so sorry for the wait. Thank you so much for being patient with me. Life is so busy these days. I promise the next chapter won't take me as long to write!

Thank you SO much for 18.6k reads! ♥♥ I hope you are still loving my book. The moment you have been waiting for is coming very soon!

On a side note, the day tickets went on sale for Harry's tour next year, was my birthday, and it brought me and so many people I love, good luck! I got tickets to see Harry in Toronto and New York and it was the best birthday present ever! Who else got tickets?

Much love to you all! ♥
amberlove
xo