May 8th 2010-

Jessica could barely get out of bed. She was so tired. She hadn't slept since her father had died. She felt like a part of her was missing.

She had pains all day in her stomach. She didn't think much about something being wrong with the pregnancy. She kept feeling like a failure and a disappointment. It made her sick thinking about what her father would think and what he might be thinking in heaven about Jessica being pregnant.

Jessica's home was filled with flowers, containers of food, and people coming in and out giving the Lange's their condolences.

Jessica hated all the attention and pitty. She appreciated it and understood that people did it out of the kindness of their heart, but Jessica was so torn from the loss of her father. He was her best friend. They did everything together. His death was so sudden. Jessica just wanted more time...

Each hour without her dad was so painful. Jessica's attitude and personality shifted. She just found out she was pregnant a week before her fathers death. It was Danny's.... Danny was very supportive of Jessica and always there for her helping her through the heartache as her father died. But once she found out she was pregnant she refused to tell Danny. She didn't know how he would react. So much was going on in her mind. What if he got mad at left her. She didn't know what she would do. She would eventually tell him, but not now.

The big thing was that now that Jessica's father was gone she wanted to leave Minnesota and go to New York. She didn't want to stay. Her and her mother were never close, she had a full ride, and she needed to get away. Her future was going to change with a baby. She needed to figure it all out.

Early in the morning Sarah came over. She was Jessica's best friend. Frankly Sarah was the only person Jessica wanted to be around. Sarah didn't pitty her or remind her of her fathers death. She tried to calm her down and distract her from the pain that seemed impossible to get rid of. Sarah was the only one who knew about the pregnancy.

Sarah walked into Jessica's room. Tissues covered the floor making the floor resemble fluffy white clouds.

"Jessie?" Sarah says softly.

She was dressed in a classy black dress that went to her knees.

"Hi." Jessica sniffles wiping her tears.

"Do you want me to help you get ready? Everyone's getting ready to head to the church." Sarah goes over to Jessica's closet and pulls out her dress and heels.

Jessica nods and slowly brings herself up.

"How do you feel today? Any morning sickness."

"No, I'm too tired to get sick."

"Alright... let me help you."

**

Jessica and her family headed to the church. The service was beautiful but hard. Jessica sobbed the hole time and couldn't build the strength to speak of or about her dad. Jessica felt pains the whole time that to a point became unbearable.

As people walked past her fathers body Jessica and her family stood by the coffin waiting for people to hug them and say they were sorry.

Jessica hated it all. The sadness was unbearable. Everything was.

As family friends walked past Jessica quickly ran out of the room. She felt so dizzy and overwhelmed.

Her boyfriend Danny saw her leaving and he followed after her. Jessica's family watched as she ran out.

"Is she okay?" Dorthy says holding her chest.

"It's too much for her, she didn't get any sleep." Jane says softly

**

"Jessica? Are you okay?" Danny runs outside of the church and sees Jessica sitting on the stairs.

"I need to be alone!" Jessica snaps moving away from Danny.

"I'm sorry, I'm just trying to help."

"I don't need your help Danny! And stop saying your sorry! I can't take hearing those two words." Jessica puts her heads by her knees and wraps up into a ball.

Danny sits next to her and rubs her back. He knew she was hurting. He wasn't sure what to do to make her feel better, nothing could really make her feel better.

**

Later in the day Danny drove Jessica back home. Guest started to arrive with food and flowers. Jessica tried to stay away from the crowd as they kept coming. She stayed near Sarah and Danny most of the time. Her whole family was a mess, but in a way everyone thought Jessica was taking it the hardest.

Jessica asked Danny to leave later on. She needed her space. She wasn't feeling well either and didn't want him to possibly find out about the pregnancy.

"Jess, I'm going to go grab some watermelon. Do you want anything?" Sarah says standing up from the rocking chair.

"I need to go to the restroom. I feel so sick. I think I'll be fine."

"Alright, if you need anything just let me know." Sarah smiles and walks into the other room.

Jessica holds her hand over her stomach and hisses in pain. She slowly starts to stand up and make her way over to the bathroom.

When she got into the bathroom she pulled her pants down and saw blood everywhere. Her heart sank and she quickly began to panic.

It was her first pregnancy. She had never been pregnant before, but she knew that blood wasn't right. Jessica's body became warm and she moved at a rapid pace out of the bathroom. Her first instinct was to find Sarah.

"Sarah, I need you to help me!" Jessica cries

"are you okay?"

"Something's wrong, I'm bleeding." Jessica whispers trying to not make her tears too obvious.

"Where? Did you cut yourself."

"I think something's wrong with the baby Sarah!"

Sarah dropped her plate and took Jessica's hand.

"We have to tell someone and get you to a hospital."

Jessica clenched her teeth and sternly looked Sarah in the eye.

"My insurance card is in my car. Nobody can know."

Sarah looks at Jessica, she was so concerned for her. She wanted to tell an adult but knew Jessica wouldn't approve.

Sarah nods and takes Jessica's hand leading her to the front door.

"No, out the back."

**

Jessica cried the whole way over. She still had intense pains and was heavily bleeding.

Sarah tried to calm her down as much as possible. When they got to the hospital the doctors immediately cared for her.

It was the longest wait in Jessica's life. Waiting to find out what was wrong. Nothing felt right. They ran multiple test.

"Are you sure you don't want me to call Danny or your mom. Jessica what if something is really wrong. I'm scared for you."

Jessica laid in the hospital bed with red puffy eyes. She felt so achey and weak.

"Don't call anyone... Please Sarah."

Sarah sat beside Jessica and nodded.

A little bit later the doctor comes into the room.

"Ms. Lange... We finished up your test."

"Is everything okay? Is my baby okay? I'm only twelve weeks. Please tell me everything's okay."

"I'm sorry ma'am, but I'm afraid that you had a miscarriage. After running our test we saw that your cervix could not hold a pregnancy. I'm very sorry... There was nothing that could have been done to prevent this."

Jessica sat in the bed for a moment. Everything was a blur. Sarah running to her side and talking to her was a blur. Jessica blocked everything out. First is fathers death, then the loss of her baby, and now the aftermath of two deaths. Jessica was speechless. She felt so broken. She felt like a horrible mother that could not keep her baby safe.

At this very moment Jessica didn't think life could get any worse.

"It's all my fault. Why does god do this to me!" Jessica throws herself onto Jessica and sobs uncontrollably. Her tears quickly fell from her eyes. She couldn't stop.

"It isn't your fault Jessica. Listen to me! It isn't..."

"I need to get away. I can't be here anymore."

"Then we can get away. Jessica, you don't deserve this."

"I just want to go home and sleep." Jessica's eyelids grow heavy.

She cried so much that she didn't think there were any tears left, but there where.

**
Dorthy's POV-

It's was around eleven. All of the guest had left but know one knew were Jessica was. Dorthy became worried when Jessica and Sarah hadn't responded to any of her calls or anyone else's. She only thought the worse. She hadn't seen her in hours. Dorthy even tried calling Danny. He rushed over as soon and possible then drove around.

"Where could she be! What if she's hurt!" Dorthy paces around the living room.

"Mom, you can't do this to yourself." Ann says following her.

"She's sick! She has been so upset. What if she did something to herself."

"She didn't mom. She's obviously with Sarah. Jessica most likely needed to get away from everyone for a bit." Jane says

"God damn it! I wish your dad was still here." Dorthy sits on the couch and covers her face.

"Mom..." George says looking out the window.

"Yes baby?" Dorthy stands up and runs to him.

From the window she saw Sarah walking next to Jessica holding her in a blanket.

Dorthy and Danny ran to the door swinging it open.

Jessica's body was drained. There was no light or emotion. Sarah supported her body as she took slow steps.

"Jessica Phyllis Lange! Where have you two been!" Dorthy yells with tears running down her face.

Jessica squinted her eyes. She had he worst headache.

"Dorthy, I should take Jessica up to her room."
Sarah says

"Where were you two! You just left! That's so rude!"

Jessica still didn't respond. She couldn't.

Danny walked up to Jessica and tried to hug her but she walked past his arms holding the blanket around her.

Dorthy watched as Jessica slowly walked up the stairs, not saying a word.

Everyone turned to Sarah.

"What happened?" Dorthy says sternly

"I'm sorry if I scared you guys. Our phones were here. Jessica, she's just not well. It was too overwhelming for her to be here. I just took her to the park. I'm sorry again."

Dorthy looks at Sarah and gives her a hug.

"Thank you for being such a good friend to Jessica. Something seems really wrong, was she wearing a hospital blanket?"

"Yes, I had one in my car." Sarah says trying to keep the lie going.

"Thanks for bringing her home Sarah." Ann comes up behind Dorthy.

"Why doesn't she want to talk to me?" Danny says

"She isn't well right now. Just give her time."

Danny sighed.

"I have to go run this up to her." Sarah holds a brown bag in her hand and runs upstairs. The brown bag had Jessica's medication from the hospital. She didn't want to tell Jessica's family about anything.

"Jessie, I have your medication." Sarah takes it out of the bag and sets it on her nightstand.

Jessica rolls over and looks at Sarah.

"I would have been a horrible mother anyways."

"Jessica, don't say that."

"It wasn't meant to be. Danny doesn't even know."

"It's up to you if you want to tell him or not."

"I can't tell him. I don't want to be with him anymore. I can't. He's too good for me. I'm a mess. Sarah, I have to get into NYU. I can't be here anymore. I need to leave. I need to find myself and start over. I need to leave everything behind."

**
The next few months were the hardest. Jessica never left the house until a month later. Jessica's depression got the worst of her. She tried seeing someone, but she couldn't talk about the baby or her father. Sarah was still the only one who knew about the pregnancy and the miscarriage. She never told Danny a single word. It made it so much harder for her to see him. Her and Danny drifted more and more. Tensions rose between Jessica and her mother. It was like Albert was the glue of the family,now that he was gone all of the family did their own things. Jessica ended up moving out of her mothers in late June. She moved to New York with Sarah a few weeks later after she took her scholar ship to NYU. It was Jessica's dream.

Before she left she had left a letter for Danny, she broke up with him.

Once Jessica left Minnesota she promised herself she would never live there again.