You know, there are just some things you can expect about weddings. Kissing, crying, cake, dancing, sitting in complete boredom for several hours while some old man drones on and on.

A younger sibling of the bride smashing the cake and disappearing is not one of those things. It turns out that that's highly frowned upon. Who knew, right?

Jamie Nader, the younger sibling in question, hadn't meant to ruin their sister's wedding. They had just been running to get the flowers for the brides' hair out of the ice chest. Of course, the ice chest was in the kitchen, and to get to the kitchen from Julie's room one had to go through the dining room.

The cake had been moved to the dining room.

It was a gigantic, beautiful affair, with icing frills and ribbons, lilies and roses, and a specially ordered, custom made cake topper that looked just like the two to be married.

In other words, if anything were to happen to it, a lot of people would be very very disappointed. Half of the guests were only coming for the free cake. Julie would be furious beyond belief. Annette would cry. Jamie's parents would ground them for months. Grandma Song's heart might give out. Grandfather Jean may never be the same again. And, worst of all, Jamie's Great-Grandmother would make the disappointed face she made whenever Jamie accidentally ruined something.

That didn't happen quite as often as you'd think, but your guess was probably close. Funnily enough, the last time she'd made that face had also involved a cake. She'd been trying to teach Jamie to bake, (key word trying) and Jamie had put in not coconut oil, but white vinegar. In their defense, the oil and vinegar were in identical containers on the counter. Yes, they were labeled. No, Jamie didn't stop to read those labels. Yes, the cake turned out completely inedible. But the next time it they tried it turned out alright!

Too bad Julie was (hopefully) only getting married once.

And her magnificent cake was smashed on the floor. And the china cabinets. And Jamie's fancy wedding-wear. The specially ordered custom made cake topper that looked exactly like the brides was in pieces on the floor. The two torsos and heads still hugged each other, but the legs were scattered everywhere. That's the kind of thing you can't really come back from.

There was nothing left to do but run.

So Jamie snuck back to their own room to grab some essentials: snacks, deodorant, an extra shirt and underwear and socks, phone charger, earbuds, a Tupperware container for some of the cake, since they probably  weren't forbidden from tasting anymore, (that was from the kitchen) pretty much anything they could want for a couple hours away from home. And they snuck back out the door, leaving a note of apology on the ruins of the cake.

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They were in the yard when someone screamed in the house. It sounded like Julie, but they couldn't tell for sure while they were running.

If it was Julie, Jamie was even more screwed than they had originally thought. If it was Annette, they were absolutely terrified. If Annette was devastated and/or angry enough to scream like that, not only would Annette be devastated and/or angry enough to scream like that, Julie would also be pissed at Jamie for making her fiancee devastated/angry to scream like that. And that would be on top of Julie being pissed that they had smashed her cake and ruined what was supposed to be the best day of her life.

It's hard to think about your future/possible imminent demise while you're running. Jamie learned that the hard way, when they stopped to catch their breath behind a tree and realized they had ABSOLUTELY no idea where they were, except that they were somewhere in the forest. It wasn't the part they knew like the back of their hand. It was a part out of sight of any of the paths they knew. And there was something rustling around in the bushes to their right, and it definitely sounded bigger than pretty much any nonthreatening squirrel or bird.