First things first: what I’m about to reveal has NOTHING to do with online dating, so relaaaaax, take a deep breath, & take your finger off the damn mouse.

I know, I know, a lot of dating coaches recommend online dating apps like they’re some kind of holy grail – but honestly, I’m not a huge fan of dating apps like Tinder.  Although some folks do get lucky, the yield of awesome-men-to-effort-invested is generally pretty low.

Instead, I’ve got something WAY better for you. Here is where we start making real-life transformations in a way that will change your life, open up huuuge new vistas of fresh, amazing, high-quality men, & (best of all) build your self-esteem, self-worth, & your perceived VALUE TO MEN: & build ‘em higher & stronger than the Great Pyramid at Giza.

If you follow what I say in this section, and actually do what I tell you, then you’re gonna GROW – in all the right ways. What you’re about to do will SHOW (not tell) men everywhere that you are DIFFERENT from the rest: a woman of value, mystery, & intrigue.

In short, I’m going teach you how to become fascinating.

So let’s get started: How to find, meet, & attract REAL men in the REAL world.

Let’s go.

Find an Amazing Man Step One:
Unless you like drunken frat-boys, quit looking for him in bars.

Bars and parties can be a whole lotta fun. But here’s the catch: you aren’t going to find a quality man there.

Sure, there are exceptions to this rule; most of us have a cousin with a friend whose next-door neighbor fell madly in love with someone she met during a drunken pub-crawl, right?

But we don’t care about HER.

We care about YOU.

& for the purposes of getting you a QUALITY man, that means we need to assume that that ‘friend of a friend’ woman is the EXCEPTION to the rule – not the rule itself.

In other words, unless you love the company of drunken jocks, frat-boys, & Party Animals (noooo!), stop looking for him in bars.

Here’s the deal: from now on, you may use ‘socializing’-type pastimes (parties, bars, whatever) for fun with your friends – &, if it’s your thing, tipsy hookups, should the spirit move you.

But THAT’S IT.

Quality men want QUALITY women – which means the VAST majority of them are not to be found at the corner bar.

Here’s how to find them.

Find an Amazing Man Step Two: 
Now We Discover Your Joys.

High quality men are the guys who stand out from the rest: the smart, strong-willed, kind, funny, compassionate LEADERS AMONG MEN. Guys who other men happily follow, & who women want to be with.

Clearly, to attract such a guy, you need to stand out from other women.

Now, I’m not talking about putting on your teensiest mini-dress & showing off your body (which is what most women think of when it comes to ‘standing out from the crowd’.)

Nope, I’m talking about building your value from the inside out.

& that means discovering what brings you joy – aka, finding your passions.

But … what the hell are your passions? (& why does it matter anyway?!)

Okay, let’s talk turkey … being a high-value woman starts from the INSIDE.

Which is exactly why we’re going to make YOU into one of the rarest of the rare: a woman whose inner game is rock solid, whose self-esteem is untouchable, & who oozes HIGH VALUE with every flick of the wrist & shimmy of the hips.

& that’s why finding (& then following) your passions is the biggest key to standing out from the crowd:

Because nothing else – & I mean NOTHING else – builds your value faster.

When you know what brings you joy, & then take concrete steps to include it in your life, an incredible chain reaction is born:

Doing things that bring you joy makes you, well, joyful (Duh.)

It also makes you interesting; & keeps attraction-sapping inertia away by keeping you busy.

When you’re busy, you emanate vibrations of energy and excitement, which means you draw high-energy, exciting people into your world.

&, on top of it all, when you follow your joys, you meet like-minded people (including, MEN!) who care about the same things you do (ding-ding-ding!), have actual interests of their own, have better things to do than hang around in bars, & are of high value themselves.

BOOM.

There is just one, little problem, though:

Most of us have no freaking clue what our joys actually are.

Find an Amazing Man Step Three:
Here’s How We Discover Your Joys

Okay, the first step here is to take a pencil & a piece of paper (or your phone, whatever works for you) & get ready to brainstorm.

I want you to take ten minutes & write down – yes, you do actually have to WRITE THIS DOWN; just thinking about it ain’t enough – everything you can think of that’s piqued your interest in the last couple years.

Important note: during a brainstorm, there is no such thing as a bad idea.

Now is NOT the time to worry about practicality, logistics, expense, or even your own abilities. This is the time to go absolutely nuts & just write. It. All. Down.

The ONLY important factor here? Whatever you write down must actually INTEREST you.

As an example, here’s an excerpt from my own list that I just cooked up this minute:

Rock climbing

Italian cooking

Slacklining

Learn to speak Russian

Carpentry

Poledancing (yep, really)

Learn to play pool

Triathlon

Dog training

Mountaineering

… & so on.

Take ten minutes, & keep writing things down until you hit twenty.

Then add five more just for luck.

Find an Amazing Man Step Four:
Narrow That Shit Down

Okay, you’ve done your brainstorm (yay!) … & NOW it’s time to bring out your critical-thinking skills & narrow it down.

What appeals to you more than the rest? Which ones stand out brightest to you? What can you see yourself, you know, actually doing?

Take that list of twenty-five & winnow it down to two or three.

Then pick one (just one for now! Any more & you risk overwhelm. Baby steps, people.), & sign yourself up.

Oh, & by the way – I don’t mean, sign yourself up tomorrow, or next week, or ‘when things calm down a bit’. The perfect time will NEVER come; that’s why you must take action TODAY.

You’ve got til the end of the day, today, to do so. This is non-negotiable. TAKE ACTION!

“But … what if I hate what I’ve picked??”

Ha! This is a hilarious question. Look, if you’ve followed my instructions, you will only have things on your list that you’re actually INTERESTED IN – which means the chances of you ending up with choices you hate are literally zero.

(& if something weird happens & you actually DO hate it? That’s okay! You tried something new. No harm done. Now go do something else.)

Secondly, that rumble of unease, uncertainty, and “But, I’m not sure if I actually want to do this after all’ you’re feeling?

That’s called ‘nervousness’ … & it’s a GOOD SIGN. Life is knocking at your door & I am going to force you to open up & let it in.

It’s good to feel nervous. Means you’re doing a good job. Keep going.

Here’s Why This Works So Damn Well

Look, I know getting out of your little comfort-rut feels hard at first. I get it: life is busy. Your calendar is full. You work fifty hours a week, your commute is four hours every day, you’ve got a puppy, a baby, & a goldfish to take care of …

… yada, yada, YADA.

Like I said, this shit is non-negotiable. & here’s why it’s all (I absolutely PROMISE) so very, VERY worth it:

You will learn something new.

You’ll gain new skills to teach others. (Hot.)

Your time will become VALUABLE (& not just focused around whichever man you’re interested in this week & whether or not you should text him back just yet.)

You’ll have a laugh.

&, you’ll meet cool, interesting, like-minded people (including, men!) who you’d never normally meet.

Now, I get it if you’re rolling your eyes here and saying Come on, this is intro-level stuff here.

& yeah. It is. I know.

But THIS IS HOW YOU MEET MEN. & not just any men, but quality men.

Now you have interests in your life that don’t revolve around guys & socializing. Now you’re actually stocking your mind with weird new experiences that build your confidence & boost your self-esteem. Now you’re having fun in ways that grow your life experience & make you interesting.

Always remember: the art & science of getting a man’s heart involves the appearance of slight uncertainty.

Translation: men need the chase. We need the challenge. We need to feel like we have to STRIVE TO WIN YOU.

Pop quiz: guess which of the two following women are more likely to provide that sense of mystery & challenge??

The woman who sits at home, gnawing the ends of her hair & obsessing about whether she should text him back NOW, or wait another 20 minutes …

Or, the woman who doesn’t text him back just yet because she’s legit busy with her own amazing, colorful, busy, INTERESTING life; &, when she DOES text back, says things like, “Sorry, I can’t do Wednesday night, I’ve got trapeze lessons that day” …?

Yeah. It’s a no-brainer.

THIS is how you become mysterious & intriguing.

THIS is how you inject the sense of COMPETITION & CHALLENGE that we men strive for.

THIS is how you fascinate a man for real – not by pretending to be a woman of high value, but by ACTUALLY BEING ONE.

THIS IS HOW YOU MEET THE HIGHEST QUALITY MEN OF ALL.

When you are the best version of yourself, the “real men” stop hiding. You will find them just by interacting in the world. Better still, they will find YOU.