HELPING SHEN MEANS he needs to drive a freaking car again, alam naman niya 'yon pero sumigi pa rin siya. He smoked the vape pod he was carrying while waiting for Eze, his best friend. Kade was waiting patiently outside the Carson Hospital, dinala ni Eze ang inaanak niya  kay Caleb para sa monthly check up nito. Kahit palagi naman nakikita ni Caleb ang mga bata.

He rolled his eyes when he saw Eze, bitbit nito si Havi habang may dala itong sling bag at maliit na bag para kay Havi. Sinalubong na niya ang mga ito at kinuha ang bag na dala dala nito. He smoked, kaya todo iwas siya bata.

"Spray some alcohol, Kade!" Eze hissed and hit him on his shoulder. Pinanlakihan pa nga siya nito ng mata.

Tumawa lang si Kade at tumango bago binuksan ang pintuan sa likod. Yes, he's going to be her driver for today. Wala ang butler ni Mikael sa hindi malaman na kadahilanan at busy sa trabaho si Mikael. 

"Your hands,"

Walang nagawa si Kade kung hindi ang ilahad ang kamay sa harapan ni Eze, inayos muna nito ang pagka buhat sa anak bago siya nito ini-spray-an ng alcohol sa kamay, Kade squeezed his eyes when Eze sprayed the alcohol on his whole body including his face!

"Arte!" Singhal niya sa kaibigan at tinawanan lang siya nito.

"Amoy sigarilyo ka!" Ganti nito sa kanya.

"May flavor ang vape ko, chocolate oh!" Hinila niya ang vape pod at pinaamoy 'yon kay Eze.

"May nicotine pa rin naman 'yan! 'Wag mo munang gagamitin 'yan habang kasama mo kami."

"Yes mam." He flatly answered and shut the door.

Umikot lang si Kade at sumakay sa driver seat. Ihahatid muna niya ang kaibigan bago balikan si Shen sa bahay ni Mrs. Beaufort, her potential business partner according to Shen.

"You're driving a car. Hindi na pagpapa impress 'to, Kade." Eze suddenly talk. He glanced at the rare view mirror and saw Eze looking outside the window.

He pursed his lips to hide his smile. "You sounds worried. Kikiligin na ba ako at dapat na bang mag selos ang asawa mo?" Pagbibiro niya kay Eze.

He heard her chuckled. "Of course I'm worried, kaibigan mo ako. As of Mikael, try to make him jealous and die." Eze threatened.

"Sa inyong dalawa ni Mikael, mukhang ikaw talaga ang sasagasa sa akin." Natatawang sagot niya.

"Buti alam mo." Umismid ito. "About your stepmother, ano na Kade? Igagalaw mo pa ba ang baso?" Pang-aalaska ni Eze kay Kade.

Kade shrugged his shoulder and nervously laughed. He honestly don't know. At ayaw niya rin magbitaw ng salita. He can't trust himself, more so, his body. He might do something that can hurt his father and wiped the smile on his face in one snap.

His second name will served it purpose.

"Do you really like her?" Eze asked again.

Napalabi siya at bahagyang tumango. "Hindi ako titigil sa paglalaro kung hindi."

"She's lucky and you... Malas mo." Naiiling na sagot nito sa kanya.

Yes, he was really unlucky. Lusting and falling at the same time with the woman he can't have. Sometimes, he envy his friends, meeting their love ones and marrying them and start a new beginning. Siya rin sana kung hindi lang siya nagkamali na iuwi sa unit niya ang babaeng bumabaliw sa kanya ngayon.

Kade let out a loud and deep sighed. Kung hindi niya nakilala si Shen noong gabing 'yon, he's sure and he can bet his life on the line, that he was still bound to met a woman named Sheila Eiran Nyx Avanceña.

"Thanks for the ride! Ingat ka, 'yang puso mo ah!" Biro ng kaibigan niya sa kanya. "And don't forget to sleep!" Pahabol na sigaw nito.

Natatawang tinanguan niya lang ito bago nag drive papunta sa bahay ni Mrs. Beaufort. Kade turned on his phone using his one hand, he turned it off a while ago because his father kept on calling him and asking for update from time to time.

Naiirita na siya to the point na gusto na niyang ibato ang cellphone niya, good thing his mind was still intact and kept on reminding him that his phone was brand new, at ilang linggo pa lang niya itong nagagamit.

Kade open the window and turned off the cars ac. Mas gusto niya ang ma pollution na hangin kaysa sa amoy ng sasakyan, dahil pinapakalma nito ang mga ugat niya sa katawan. Ever since that day, he hated driving car.

His hand automatically moved and get the hidden one pack of cigarettes and lighter on the car's compartment, kumuha siya ng isang stick at iniipit 'yon sa mga labi niya bago 'yon sindihan. At the back of his mind, someone's whispering, na ikakapahamak niya ang paninigarilyo.

"Fuck!" He cursed loudly and accidentally pressed the horn when the face of his stepmom showed up in his mind.

Mabilis niyang inubos ang isang stick at binilisan ang pagmamaneho niya. He wants to rest and visit the Infinite track again tonight to race. Kailangan niya ulit linawin sa utak niya na hindi pwede ang stepmom niya. Na hanggang tingin nalang siya at hindi na siya makakatikim ulit! Na hindi niya mararanasan kung ano man ang namumuo sa utak niya!

"Tangina mo naman oh!" He cursed himself.

MAAGANG NATAPOS ang meeting nilang dalawa ni Marga kaysa sa inaasahan niya, and Kade, her driver for today wasn't with her. Gusto na niyang umuwi at magpahinga. Pagod ang utak maski ang katawan niya. Although, she's been doing this work since Kade's dad took her.

"Gusto mo ba magpahinga?" Tanong sa kanya ni Marga.

Gumuhit ang malapad na ngiti sa labi ni Shen, hindi na kaya ng katawan niya para tumanggi pa siya sa inaalok nito. She's kind and sweet. At higit sa lahat, magaan din itong katrabaho, she's open when it comes to her opinions about their business collab.

"Iidlip lang ako," nahihiyang sabi niya rito. Marga just smiled and nod her head.

Sa bahay lang ito, kasama ang brother in law nito, na nag-aalaga sa baby nito. Shen wondered where was the baby's father, how could he leave a precious family behind.

"Here, gigisingin nalang kita kapag dumating na ang driver mo."

"He's not my driver," kagat labi niyang pagtatama rito. "Well, he's my..." Nag-iwas siya ng tingin kay Marga.

"Ahh, siya 'yung sinasabi mo? He's handsome. Baka may kaibigan pa siya na available? 'Yung tatanggapin sana kami ni   Larthine." Pagbibiro nito sa kanya.

Napailing lang siya at nakangiting umiling rito. Wala siyang masyadong kakilala sa mga kaibigan ni Kade, ni hindi nga sila madalas magkita kahit na sa iisang bahay sila nakatira. Kade stays up at night and she stays up in morning, not to mention na hindi siya nag stay sa bahay t'wing umaga.

He's just doing her a favor, kaya sila magkasama ngayon.

"Rest well, Ma'am." She playfully said before shutting the door off.

Tinanggal ni Shen ang pagkakatali ng buhok niya at hinayaan na lumugay ito. Ngayon na nakakita siya ng kama, unti unting bumibigat ang talukap ng mga mata niya. Shen immediately removed her stilettos and crawled into the bed. The room smells nice too. Hindi 'yon masakit sa ilong.

She carefully laid her back against the soft mattress and yawned. Tinignan muna niya ang cellphone kung sakali na may text or missed calls si Kade sa kanya, but as usual, there's none. It was his father who filled her phone with missed calls and messages.

But before she can type any words, bumagsak na ang katawan niya at nilamon na siya ng antok.

"SHE MUST'VE been tired and not giving herself a break. Mag na-nine na, sigurado ka ba na hindi mo siya gigisingin? Ahm, if you want pwedeng dito na muna kayo. I'll ask my brother to share his room with you or you can sleep here? May extra mattress naman diyan..."

Naalimpungatan si Shen nang marinig ang boses ni Marga.

"Thanks, I'll sleep here. The sofa looks comfortable, pwede na ako doon."

She slowly open her eyes when she heard a deep and baritone voice, it was Kade's voice. Saulo pa rin ni Shen ang boses nito kahit na hindi sila araw araw na nag-uusap.

Hinintay niya muna na makalabas sa kwarto si Marga bago niya tuluyan na imulat ang mga mata at dahan dahan na umupo. Kade turned his head towards her and looked at her. Shen cleared her throat and avoided his gaze. It was too intense for her to handle it.

"Ituloy mo lang tulog mo," he said.

Bahagyang umangat ang paningin ni Shen, nakita niya itong inaayos ang mga throw pillows sa sofa bago ito humiga. Malaking tao si Kade kaya kahit malaki na ang sofa sa paningin niya, lumampas pa rin ang mga paa nito.

"You can sleep here, malaki naman ang space sa kama." She offered and gently patted the space beside her.

Shen lost her smiled when Kade glared at her. Did she do something wrong? She wanted to asked him, pero kusang umaatras ang dila niya dahil sa tingin nito sa kanya. Kapagkuwan ay bumuntong hininga ito at ginawa nitong unan ang isang braso, she gulped hardly because of that. She managed to survive for a year after that night with him. She managed to stay sane and be a good wife.

Pinaglaruan niya ang singsing sa daliri. Pinapaalalahanan ang sarili na huwag magpapadala sa tukso.

"Hindi ka kasi mukhang komportable diyan, kung gusto mo palit nalang tayo? Ikaw na dito sa kama, ano... Nakatulog naman kasi ako kanina, baka mahirapan ulit ako makatulog..." Pahina ng pahina ang boses niya dahil sa klase ng titig ni Kade sa kanya. It was piercing her soul.

Umiling ito sa kanya at pinikit ang mga mata. She can tell that he's still awake, his adams apple kept on moving up and down.

God, she wants to bang her head on the wall and have an selective amnesia after. The awkwardness between them was suffocating her.

"I can't sleep. Hindi ko dala ang sleeping pills ko."

Hindi na nagulat si Shen sa narinig. Alam na niya. Alam niya ang dahilan kung bakit hindi ito makatulog nang maayos. Kagat niya ang labi at bumaba sa kama, at naglakad papunta sa sofa kung saan ito nakahiga.

"What?" Nakaangat ang isang kilay na tanong nito sa kanya.

"Lipat ka sa kama," pa utos na sabi niya. He rolled his eyes pero sumunod pa rin naman ito sa gusto niya na ikinangiti ni Shen.

He's cute.

Padabog na ibinagsak ni Kade ang katawan sa kama, kinuha pa nito ang isang unan at para itong bata na niyakap 'yon. Sumampa na rin siya sa kama at walang pasabi na tumabi kay Kade. Shen carefully lifted his head and placed it on her lap, he was about to get up when Shen pressed a part of his nape, para ma knock out ito.

"Now, you're asleep." She proudly whispered to herself.

She learned it back when she was still in highschool, palagi kasi siyang target ng mga manyak noon sa kanto kaya tinuruan siya ng P.E teacher niya kung alin parte ng katawan ang kailangan niyang puntiryahin.

Without moving a lot, pilit inabot ni Shen ang bag niya na nasa side table para mai-check ang cellphone niya. Siguradong nag-aalala na ito.

A smiled curve into her lips when she saw her phone lock screen, it was her. Noong high school pa siya, halos walang pinagbago ang mukha niya, maliban nalang sa height niya na kahit papaano ay nadagdagan.

From: Daddy

Shen, I'm worried about you and Kade. Uuwi ba kayo? It's better if mag check in nalang kayo sa malapit na hotel. Don't let him drive the car.

Napangiti si Shen at sinulyapan si Kade. Sinuklay niya ang buhok nito at dahan dahan na pinadaan ang hintuturo sa matangos na ilong nito. He's lucky to have a understanding and loving father. His father never forced him to work in the company, kahit nasa tamang edad na ito.

To: Daddy

We're safe, Dad. You don't need to worry, sa bahay kami ni Marga magpapalipas ng gabi.

Isinandal niya ang ulo sa headboard ng kama habang sinusuklay niya ang buhok nito gamit ang mga daliri niya. It's been a year and counting, but there's still no progress.

"Hanggang kailan ako maghihintay?" She whispered and stared at her phone.

☕