chapter nine, winter is coming

     EVERYONE WANTED TO REACH the shore so bad that when they actually did, after almost two weeks of being in the sea, they didn't understand what was waiting for them out there.

      Fjerda wasn't the most welcoming country. It was cold, the snowstorms were often and the people there were very close and their superstitions about Grisha is what started the war.

       All of the crew was already changed into their winter clothing— thick coats, scarfs, hats, boots and even goggles since the cold might blind someone if you are not careful. Everyone was worried, except Matthias, he was the expert there and everything depended on him. No one was sure that he will really betray his country— it was more likely he will betray a pack of criminals.

       There was a long journey against them through the snow since they had to sail to the north and not where the city's harbours were. It would only cause more suspicions that wouldn't do any good to them.

They all had to leave their precious belongings in the Ferolind— Kaz exchanged his Fabrikator made cane into a simple one, Inej left her knives and took other ones. Jesper exchanged his decorated revolvers into normal ones and Lavender left her crimson red heels and she wrapped the velvet piece from her hair around them.

"See you in Djerholm harbour," one of the sailors, named Specht, mumbled , "No mourners."

"No funerals," others, except Lavender and Matthias replied.

"What does it mean?" Lavender asked silently as she was walking on the crunchy snow beside Jesper, a bag with some medik stuff inside.

"It's for good luck," Jesper replied, his lips getting drier within each of the steps. It was a tough journey ahead, but no one will complain. This won't be the worst that already awaits.

"Yet you always talk about an open casket," she pointed out.

"Because I want it!" Jesper whined and soon all of them put the goggles on since Matthias started to blabber that if they won't— they will end up with frozen body parts and Lavender will have to cut them off.

All of them looked back at least once to see how the Ferolind sailed away. It was their only way back if they make it. And that's how most of the crew got separated into small groups. The first one to go was Matthias and behind him was Kaz as he was walking incredibly fast even if one of his legs was bad. Nina stuck to Wylan and Inej and at the back walked the siblings.

"What's with the deal with Kaz and gloves?" Lavender asked, feeling how her fingers were getting numb from the cold.

"He doesn't like to be touched," Jesper shrugged, "I heard once someone touched him and he cracked that man's skull into a brick wall," Jesper replied with a serious face that was behind the massive goggles.

"Who could have thought that Kaz Brekker isn't the cuddly type?" Lavender sarcastically pointed out and Jesper suppressed a snicker, meanwhile, Lavender's thoughts wandered elsewhere.

      She didn't know what happened to him in the past. A part of her didn't even want to find out since everything was written on his facial expression. There was no joy in his eyes, only greed and pure anger. But Lavender couldn't help but think how lonely he must be... Unless the money provides him with eternal happiness.

     "How did you end up in the gang anyways?" Lavender asked as they never really had the chance to talk tons.

     "I was studying in Ketterdam once I got there, but once some students decided to go to a gambling hall. I joined them and that's when I got into debt... Some guys jumped on me a few days later and Kaz beat them up and I just joined him," Jesper replied, his voice silent.

    "You could have just come back home," Lavender pointed out. "Father paid for all of these years— did you just gamble the money away?"

    "I did... I am not proud of what I did— I am not..." Jesper admitted and Lavender looked down at the perfectly shiny snow.

     "I know you are not. I just wish you would have written to me, I would have come for you," Lavender said and grabbed his hand and squeezed it as they kept ongoing.

     "If we don't survive—," Jesper started.

     "Don't you dare hold that thought," Lavender exclaimed.

     "If we don't survive— I want you to know that with these goggles you are the one who looks like a volcra," he exclaimed with a smile and Lavender gasped in disbelief and she leaned down and grabbed a handful of snow and squeezed it together, hitting Jesper with it.

    "Idiot," she laughed as Jesper hit her with another snowball and they both just cackled behind everyone.

    Kaz was thinking about the plan over and over again in his mind and it was starting to make him worried. But he won't let others know that he is having second thoughts. Everything will work out. But once he heard Lavender's laughter in the back— all of the thoughts about the plan faded away for a few seconds.

     Her laughter was like music to his ears that he adored so much. It made the memories flow in his head again, making his heart thump faster as he shook his head slightly. He couldn't allow himself to think about her.

"I got you something," Kaz started as he sat in front of Lavender, his hands slightly shaking. He didn't know why he was so nervous around her.

"Really?" A huge smile plastered on the girl's face.

"Here..." He silently exclaimed and extended his hand where a red ribbon lay in it. Kaz didn't have anything to give to Lavender, all he had was Saskia's red bow and he wanted her to have it.

Lavender's eyes lit up as she slowly took the ribbon, her eyes filling with delightful tears as she looked at the boy in front of her. His cheeks were flushed in pink as he avoided her eyes, so just tightly pulled him into a hug, thanking him.

Kaz hugged her back and for the first time felt her wonderful scent of lavenders that made him feel that he was where he belonged. He belonged there, with Lavender, with Jordie.

Kaz shook his head once again as he remembered how he saw Lavender in the Crow Club, that velvet piece braided into her hair just how her mother taught her. He cursed himself that he remembered every detail about Lavender, he cursed himself every night when his mind would linger— He hasn't seen her in seven years and yet he thought about her every day.

He had the biggest urge to look back, to see her laugh, to see her smile... But he couldn't afford himself to do this.

"My feet are going to freeze off!" Wylan complained as Jesper and Lavender joined them.

"When we get our money, you can burn kruge to keep you warm," said Kaz.

"I am going to pay someone to burn my kruge for me," Jesper pointed out.

"As if you will have any left after you will pay off your debts," Lavender pointed out.

"Then I will burn your kruge," Jesper compromised.

Kaz soon ended up beside Jesper, "Why don't you pay someone else to pay someone to burn your kruge for you? That's what big players do."

"With that kind of mindset you both will end up without any kruge in about a month," Lavender pointed out.

Soon enough Kaz started to talk about the plan in more detail. They will enter through the prison, Inej will climb to the roof, they will get to the room and get access to the glass bridge.

Then they all discussed the guards at the checkpoints, the different protocol meanings. The yellow protocol was sector disturbance, red protocol — sector breach and the black protocol was something that meant they will die immediately.

What was the funniest was that Kaz made Matthias imitate how the clocks might sound during the protocols. It's not every day you see Matthias go: "Bing bong bong bing."

"What are you going to do when you get rich, Wylan?" Jesper asked when the whole talk about the plan ended.

"I don't know yet," the kid replied.

"You will buy a golden piano—" Jesper suggested

"A flute," Wylan corrected.

"Will you play for us, Wylan?" Lavender asked.

     "Yes, will you play for us, Wylan?" Jesper sarcastically repeated.

     "I hate you both," Wylan mumbled, receiving a snicker from Jesper.

      If Lavender thought that the sea air was horrible for lungs, but this kind of cold, was making her breathing hitch more than it should, making her quickly fall behind everything since Fjerda was all about hills.

      She set her own pace, away from everyone, hearing their talking as she walked, feeling her lungs start to hyperventilate and at this moment she felt helpless and completely useless. She tried to shake herself from the horrible thoughts and kept on moving.

      She couldn't give Brekker the satisfaction of being right.

𓄿

EVEN ON THE SECOND day of travel, Lavender was walking behind, telling everyone that it was just the snow that was slowing her down. Her lungs were burning within each breath and she wasn't so sure that when she will end up in Fjerda's prison, she will be able to get out.

Lavender noticed how the group stopped at the top of the hill and when she got to them she saw what was down. There was a pyre and three dead bodies laying, their skin blackening already. It was clear that they were Grisha— killed by Fjerdans.

"This is what Fjerdans do to Grisha!" Nina exclaimed, her green eyes clouded with fury as she couldn't bear to see her people murdered like this.

"It's what criminals do— This has been illegal since-," Matthias started, but Nina fiercely cut him off.

"Don't you dare! Don't you fucking dare, Matthias!" She shoved the giant's chest, "And where are those criminals now? Do they get locked up in prison for killing Grisha in the wrong way?"

"Nina—" Matthias groaned.

Suddenly they all got alerted with a moan that came from below— one of them was alive. This time, Lavender was the first one to get down the hill, to the bodies since she couldn't leave that person just like that. What if it was Aleksej?

As soon as she got to the body, she couldn't even identify if it was female or male. The skin was burnt, showing raw flesh that was frozen and beginning to mould. The person was just moaning in pain and Lavender felt how tears started to prickle in her eyes. What if this was Aleksej? She couldn't save this person.

"Someone, please—," Nina sobbed from behind her and Jesper pulled Lavender away as he took out his revolver and shot the person twice.

The echo went far and Kaz immediately came to a realization that this was a mistake: "You just announced our presence for miles."

"They think it's a hunting party," Jesper exclaimed, placing his revolvers back.

"Do you think it was Aleksej?" Nina sobbed, wiping her tears that were about to get frozen on her rosy cheeks.

"No, no, it wasn't," Lavender replied as he didn't know if it was. But these words will make Nina feel better.

"Who's Aleksej?" Inej asked.

"There is no time for talking. We need to go before we will have company," Kaz nudged them all with his words.

     "Nina!" Matthias groaned again as Nina started to walk around in circles, wiping her tears away.

     "Leave me alone!" She gritted the words out. Matthias grabbed her elbow, but she threw a punch at him, but he caught her other hand in his and locked it behind her back, making her cry out even more. "What will I see in the Ice Court?"

     "Nina, don't—" Lavender intervened as nothing good waited in the Ice Court.

     "I need to know. Torture chambers? What do you actually do with Grisha?" Nina demanded answers, she had every right to have them.

    "I have had enough of this, Nina! This has to stop!" Matthias exclaimed, releasing Nina from his grip.

    "He is right. This can't go on," Jesper intervened.

    "Stay out of this!" Nina snapped, her voice was furious.

    "If you two keep fighting— someone might spot us. You two will put us in danger!" Jesper replied the mood between all of them shifted into a dense one.

     "Listen, I know you two are not on the best terms, but we are walking into the death trap. We need cooperation and your bickering is not helping!" Lavender pointed out.

     "It is not your concern, drüsje," Matthias grumbled at her even if Lavender was not a Grisha. "You all see me as the enemy!" Matthias exclaimed loudly, looking at every each of them, "That what she does— she makes you all believe her and only her!"

     "You are over exaggerating, drüskelle," Lavender mumbled.

      "No— Nina! Come on, tell them! You said you were my friend once, you made me believe that you cared about me. Do you even remember it or am I one of your many victims?" Matthias extended his hands to the sides as hurt laced his voice. "We travelled together for three weeks. I saved her life, she saved mine. When we got to Elling— I could have turned her in, but I didn't. Guess what? I ended up in Hellgate labelled as a slaver. She made me trust her!"

      "What about that part that you are the one who captured her and sailed towards Ice Court?" Lavender defended Nina. Lavender knew that Nina was caught by drüskelle.

      "I chose to not turn her in— She made me believe for one moment that she was not a witch," Matthias replied furiously, moving closer to Lavender, his anger showing.

      "Do you understand that you are the only ones that see Grisha as a threat? What crimes did they do? Existing?" Lavender's voice raised, too.

      "They are not natural," he gritted the words out, moving even closer, alerting everyone.

      "They didn't choose to be Grisha. It's not their fault the war rose. It's not their fault that they can do something you can't. And it's definitely not up to them that you are afraid," Lavender pointed out.

  "Lavender—," Jesper started, wanting to calm his sister.

      "No! You have no idea how Nina feels. There are three dead bodies surrounding us— people that she probably knew! Do you think it was up to them to get into Little Palace and train? They are made into soldiers even if they don't want to!" Lavender exclaimed loudly.

      "I thought that they weren't as bad. Nina made me feel that I was wrong— But you... You have no idea what it is like being captured— I didn't even speak Kerch, I didn't know what was going on," Matthias admitted.

      "Maybe she had a reason for what she did. I don't wish for anyone to end up in Hellgate. But you captured her, too, you even planned to execute her at the Ice Court," Lavender scoffed at him.

      "Do you want to feel what it's like? I would gladly orchestrate it," Matthias gritted out.

      "Don't go there, Helvar," Kaz intervened, his voice and stare ice-cold, moving closer to Lavender.

      Men exchanged dangerous looks and Nina just sobbed loudly behind them, taking everyone's attention on her. "I had no choice— You don't know what happened," she sobbed out.

      "I don't need to know what happened," Matthias spat out the words and within these words, the ground under them started to shake and everyone shared puzzled looks.

      They were under attack.