Jungkook dropped him off at his front door and drove away, that's when Jimin realized he had to fix his issues with his mother on his own now.

He entered the house and found it exactly how he left it. His mother's door was still closed and the decorations still on the floor.

He chose to stall the discussion as much as he could and took off his jacket, sitting down by the tree and putting the decorations one by one. He hated the task but he'd rather be doing that than crying again, at least not yet.

After finishing the tree, he decided to move on to the fairy lights, occasionally looking over at his mom's bedroom to see if there's any change.

I guess I have to draw her out of there, he thought as he played the song she paused way earlier. Jimin couldn't believe he'd been out for more than 3 hours. He really just wanted to go for a walk and come back but he ended up hanging out with unexpected people, doing unexpected things.

He was hooking the lights behind his father's framed pictures when he heard the bedroom door open. He turned around and saw his mother walk out of it with a bottle of wine in hand.

She's drunk, great, this is going to be one whole mess. He thought and sighed.

"I'm back" he simply announced and she nodded, taking the time to look at the living room, all pretty and illuminated.

"Y-ou did this?" she asked, putting the bottle on the island and leaning on it.

"Yeah"

"I thought you hated it"

"I do" he said and she just stared at him for a moment "I'm sorry mom" he added and she walked over to him, pulling him into a hug that he returned whole-heartedly.

"I love you baby, you know that right?" she whispered and he nodded in her hold.

"I love you too, so much" he replied and pulled her over to the couch "We need to talk about it mom" he said and she raised her eyebrows.

"About what"

"Dad. We need to talk about everything we've been through ever since... I wasn't so fond of the idea but somebody convinced me" he admitted and she squeezed her knees with her hands, feeling very nervous as well.

"I thought we silently agreed not to bring it up" she pointed out and he nodded.

"I'm sorry mom, I'm just not dealing with it as good as I thought I would be " he bashfully said.

"Don't apologize, my boy, I shouldn't have assumed you would" she replied, cupping his face and running her thumb on his cheek.

"I'll start... " He looked down.

"When dad was getting very sick... I was terrified of what it might mean, I was sort of in denial too... I kept thinking he would get better eventually and that everything will end, I used to tell myself that I shouldn't worry too much because dad was strong enough to survive that" he said, his voice starting to waver.

"When dad died- last March... I didn't know what to do, I saw you were so heartbroken, crying every night, you were going through hell and I didn't want to add up my issues on top of that" he said and she shook her head, holding his hands and trying to soothe him.

"I didn't think the illness would win over, but when it did, I just kept thinking it was okay and that was how life is. I thought I would get better if I helped you get better and that we would live well as long as we tried to think about dad in the happy memories" he tried to explain.

"Sometimes I didn't want to see you mom, just because I would see how sad you were. Sometimes I would cry myself to sleep because I had no one to talk to... Then I just completely blocked off the feelings of grief to a certain point that I didn't even wanna think about dad in the first few months" he said and she started tearing up again, she pulled him into another hug and pet his hair.

"You should never have gone through that alone, I'm the one who should've taken care of you" she said.

"It's okay, I started getting better and better because you did too. We started spending time together, and having fun doing things without bringing up the topic and I realized that helped me a lot... Until now" he continued.

"Halloween was fun, I felt dad's void as I'm sure you did too, but I enjoyed it because I thought it would make dad happy that we celebrate his favorite holiday as we always did. But Christmas, I just felt the grief way too fast and too suddenly that it broke out how it did... I just really love this time of the year because of you guys, and one of you not being here this year just made it all too real at once" he finished and she nodded.

"And I'm sorry I reacted that way, I shouldn't have, I should've understood how you felt and comforted you... When your father passed, I was a little prepared. He used to tell me when we were alone together that he wasn't feeling any better, that he felt like he was fading little by little. He wanted me to act as if we were going to stay together always, for you... He didn't want you to feel like your dad wasn't there anymore before he even died" she explained.

"It's true that I was a mess, your father was my first love and I couldn't get over it... Then I had all these bills piling up and-"

"I know mom, I know"

"You were having it very hard too and I couldn't be there for you... When you said that earlier, I realized I failed you and couldn't even face you so I left to my room. When you were gone, I was thinking how I would apologize, and then you came back and you went back to being the most perfect son I could dream of" she cried, hiding her face in her palms.

"I don't blame you mom, don't blame yourself" he said and they just kept holding each other for sometime, letting the contact comfort their hearts in ways words couldn't.

"Have you been smoking?" His mom suddenly pointed out and he cursed himself for forgetting such a detail. He didn't really get to change or freshen up, honestly it completely slipped his mind. He had applied some of Jungkook's hand cream and chewed gum, but he didn't think it would get on his shirt too.

"It's just Jeon... You know how he is" Jimin muttered and she raised her eyebrows.

"Did you exchange clothes then?" she challenged and he scoffed.

"He blew some smoke my way" he tried and she rolled her eyes.

"Unless you two were making out I don't see how your breath would smell like cigarettes too" she deadpanned and he double checked, he thought the gum would take care of that, maybe he didn't chew it long enough.

"Ew mom what are you saying"

"Thank god my son is normal, he's smoking behind my back" she said, looking at the ceiling, making him laugh.

"You're the weirdest mom"

"It's way too much pressure to raise you, I feel like I'm the teenager" she chuckled "You're getting grounded after Christmas though" she finished and got up.

"What? No! It's gonna be new year's!" he complained, his voice a little whiny as he followed her around.

"It's your fault for touching that stuff"

"I didn't even smoke that much, Jungkook wouldn't let me" he tried to reason with her but she just turned around and stopped him.

"First of all, I will have a word with that boy for badly influencing you, second, is he the one who told you to have this talk with me?" she asked and he nodded.

"Yeah I told him what was going on and he convinced me. Also, I won't smoke again, Jeon's super scary for real" Jimin replied, muttering the last part.

"I don't care, I need to scold someone. And if what you said is what happened then you have to find a way to thank him" she pointed out and he nodded.

"I know"

"Alright I'm kinda drunk and tired, Imma go to bed baby" she chuckled and put a kiss on his cheek before leaving to her room.

"Goodnight"

Jimin was in his room, laying in his bed after brushing his teeth. He was on social media, going through his messages when he found some unread messages in the group.

RM
Just woke up man

Hobi
Damn
Hope you rested well

RM
Hell yeah I did

Jin
Hobi and I were with Rob and Hyul

RM
How are they doing
I haven't seen them in a while

Hobi
They're good
They missed you

RM
I gotta link with them again

Suga
We're all seeing each other next weekend right?
Not on Christmas Eve tho
We'll be with family

Hobi
I'll be at my aunts house too

TaeTae
I'm spending the Eve with Uptight Smoker!
Our parents wanna get together like every other Christmas

Jeon009
Stop with that

Chim
Don't be sensitiiiiive

Jeon009
I'm not the sensitive one

Jimin gasped and narrowed his eyes at his screen, fully aware that the elder was referencing how he cried earlier, multiple times.

TaeTae
Don't start

Suga
I'm interested in the beef

Chim
No beef here

Hobi
Really?

Jin
Wow for once

RM
I bought all of you guys gifts
Y'all better do the same for me

Hobi
I already know I shouldn't expect nothing from Yoongi this year

RM
My brother isn't petty like that

Suga
I might just be

Jin
Am I the only one who struggled to get Jungkook's gift

TaeTae
I bought it a while ago

RM
Yeah man I struggled too

Hobi
We just don't know what you like anymore @Jeon009

Jeon009
You don't have to get me anything

Suga
Nah come on

RM
I will be wearing an ugly Christmas sweater when I see y'all

Hobi
Why

RM
I like them

Suga
Yeah he's weird like that

Jin
Anything looks good on me

TaeTae
I hope it snows this week
I want to play in the snow

Hobi
My fav kiddo wants to play in the snow that is so cute

Suga
I don't get it
It's just white and cold

TaeTae
Yeah you wouldn't understand

Jeon009
Later.

Chim
I don't understand why he needs to explicitly leave...
In text

TaeTae
Ikkkkkk he always does that

Hobi
I'm excited for Christmas

Suga
Okay damn we know