September 26, 1998 - Season 24 Premiere of Saturday Night Live

It was a Saturday at 8:30 a.m. and it was the season premiere of SNL. Cameron Diaz was hosting. I was slightly nervous, but more excited. I parked in the parking lot across 30 Rockefeller Center. Over the past 3 weeks, I've had countless rehearsals.

Jimmy and I haven't spoke since that awkward lunch at Starbucks. I felt terrible. I bet he hated my guts for just leaving because, I think, we were about to kiss. We didn't even speak during rehearsals.

I parked my car. Before I got out, I laid back in my seat and sighed. Don't blow this, Malina.

I walked into NBC Studios, and made my way to Studio 8H. All this sudden, I started to get massive anxiety. Whenever I get anxiety, I get nauseous. And me thinking about getting nauseous gave me more anxiety, which doesn't help at all.

I walked in the door that led to the stage. The whole cast was already there, I must've been a bit late. I saw Jimmy on stage, walking around. I tried not to have him notice me as much as possible. I walked on stage, where everyone was. Lorne was going to talk to the whole cast. I saw Ana Gasteyer, Darrell Hammond, Will Ferrell, and a bunch of others.

Lorne talked to us about how many rehearsals we were going to do, and what time we had to get ready.

I went into the Ladies dressing room. I was going to appear in a short clip, and a couple of miniature characters in 3 sketches.

I opened the door to the ladies dressing room. I saw Ana Gasteyer, Molly Shannon, and Cheri Oteri. Ana noticed me, and walked over to me. "Hey kid! First show! Are you excited?" She asked. I smiled and nodded, "Yeah." I said.

We rehearsed the whole show about 2 times. I checked the time on my phone. Oh crap. It was 5 minutes away from showtime. My makeup was already done, and my clothes were on.

I walked backstage where everybody already was. "Go kill 'em! You'll do great." A voice from behind me said. I turned around, it was Darrel Hammond. "Thanks!" I said. I heard the saxophones play for the introduction.

Cameron Diaz did her monologue, and a few sketches later, my clip came on. I got really excited. I heard a lot of people laughing, which made me feel really good.

The show went by really quick. I was having so much fun. My parents were out there in the audience. Lorne told the whole cast to go out on stage for the closure. Cameron Diaz did the closure, and the show was over. The cast went backstage. Chris Kattan patted my shoulder, "Good job!" He said. I giggled, "Thank you so much!"

Once the audience left, I went out to greet my parents. I gave them both a hug, "Thanks so much for coming!" I said. My mom and dad smiled, "You did so great! We are so incredibly proud of you." My mom said. "Great job, sweetheart." My dad said. I couldn't wait until next week. "You should go. You don't want to miss the after party!" Dad said. I hugged them one more time, and went backstage.

There was music playing, and a snack table. I looked around, and saw Jimmy standing alone drinking a can of Ginger Ale. I went over to him. I was determined to find out if he was furious at me or not.

I went up to him and nudged his arm, "Can I talk to you for a moment?" I asked Jimmy. He nodded. "Are you mad at me?" I asked. Jimmy raised an eyebrow, "Why would I be mad at you?" He asked, his eyebrow still raised. "I just feel horrible for bailing out on you at Starbucks." I explained. Jimmy shook his head, "I'm not mad at you at all!" He said with a giggle in the middle of his sentence. "Okay. Thanks for understanding." I said with a smile.

The whole party, me and Jimmy just talked. Relief flooded through me knowing that he didn't hate me.

"I should probably get going." I said. Jimmy nodded, "Want me to walk you out?" Jimmy offered. I smiled, "Sure." We walked out of the building, and he walked me to my car.

We stopped, and I gave him a hug. "Great job, by the way." I said. He rubbed his hand on my back. "You too." I lifted up my head, and we were right back to where we were at Starbucks. Our faces really close together. I got the sudden urge to kiss him, I couldn't hold this urge back anymore. I slowly sunk my lips into his. He instantly started kissing me back. I put my arms around his neck. I didn't want to stop. It went on for a while. His hands in my hips.

"Woah, woah, woah, woah." We heard a voice say. We both let go, and looked who said that. It was Will Ferrel. "Is this comedy or some sort of dramatic romantic opera?" Will said. Jimmy and I cracked up. "Yeah. Your very funny, Will." Jimmy said sarcastically. Will laughed, "Good job, guys! I can definitely see you guys being successful." I smiled. I hope so.

"Goodnight." Jimmy said with a sexy smirk. "Goodnight." I said back. And then, Jimmy walked away.

I couldn't believe what just happened.