<><><><><>

Jo

It was full dark when we pulled up in front of the gates of The Kingdom for the second time that day. After contacting Dwight we had been running messages between the communities non-stop. I was exhausted and I knew Daryl was no better. Riding all day and the stress of needing to be constantly on guard and aware was taking it's toll. Daryl stopped the bike, the engine rumbled as we waited for the gates to open. After a minute or so of waiting I frowned. Every other time we had come to The Kingdom the gates had opened as soon as we approached.

"Hey!" Daryl called loudly. "Open the-"

There was shout from behind the wall, cutting off his words. I squinted into the dark trynig to make out what little movement I could see at the top of the wall. I stilled, straining to hear anything over the engine. My whole body tensed. Something was going on. It would be easiest for us to just turn and leave, but if something had happened here in the hours since we had left...Carol and Ezekiel were in there. We couldn't just leave them.

"Turn it off," I called so Daryl could hear me. My mind was racing, it didn't feel like The Saviors were here. I was almost positive if Negan and his men had taken The Kingdom Negan himself would be standing at the top of the gate gloating about it and pointing a hundred guns at Daryl and I. Had there been some kind of revolt? Most of Ezekiel's men seemed to love him and I didn't think that was something Carol or Jerry would have allowed. This was something else.

There was more shouting from the gate and I caught the glint of light off their bows.

Just as Daryl reached down to turn the key something slammed into our right side. Daryl lost his balance and the bike started to fall. In the dim moonlight I could just make out the herd as it poured towards us. Several of the ones closest to us dropped, but it was too dark for the archers on the wall to see well. There was more shouting, but I didn't pay attention to that. We were still falling. If we both landed under the bike we could be pinned. Helpless.

It went against every instinct I had to stay as close to him as possible to protect him. But I couldn't fight for us if I was trapped under the bike, and I wasn't strong enough to lift the bike if it fell on me. I shoved myself backwards away from the bike and away from Daryl. My low back jammed against the back of the seat catching the edge as I rolled free. I landed flat on my back on the asphalt, knocking the wind out of me.

All I could hear was the rumbling engine of the bike and the only light was from the headlight. I couldn't hear the herd, I couldn't hear Daryl. I tasted panic on the back of my tongue and I flipped myself up onto my feet. I landed unsteadily as my chest continued to scream for air, but I pushed myself past it. I whirled to see Daryl still trapped by the bike, lifting his crossbow.

This, it was stupid shit like this that got people killed. I wasn't willing to let Daryl and I die tonight. I palmed two knives and let one fly at the walkers closest to Daryl. I ran straight towards where Daryl was half pinned under the bike. He was firing his crossbow towards the herd. If I could buy him a few seconds he could get himself free.

I jumped over the top of the motorcycle running straight for the herd. I drew a second knife as I moved.

"Damnit Jo!" I heard Daryl's angry snarl but as usual I ignored it.

I started slashing and hacking at anything the moved, anything that tried to get past me to get to Daryl. I heard Daryl yell again. I heard the thwack of his crossbow, and I gritted my teeth in frustration. He was supposed to get himself out, not give up the chance I was giving him trying to foolishly protect me. I fought even harder, snapping off knives as needed and twisting too fast for one of them to get a hold of me.

Several near me dropped just before I could strike with arrows lodged in their skulls. I tripped as one fell towards me and I heard shouting from the fence. My foot caught on one of the corpses and I was falling backwards. I tucked my head and neck forward, bracing for a rough landing.

I jerked as I crashed into something warm. Daryl's arm snaked around my waist, catching me. He pulled me backwards, half lifting me away from the herd.

"Light 'em up!" Daryl yelled, waving with the arm still holding his crossbow. "And don't hit my bike assholes!"

"Now!" I recognized Carol's voice from somewhere behind us.

Gunfire started and Daryl pulled me back even further. I felt when his back hit the wall. I flinched as the gunshots echoed off the metal walls, making the shots sound even louder than before. Daryl's arm tightened around my waist comfortingly, but my blood was still up and I could taste the adrenaline.

"Shh," his lips pressed against the shell of my ear and I closed my eyes. I leaned deeper into him trying to force myself into letting it go, but the fight was still too close.

"Okay! Cease fire! Cease fire!" Carol's voice called loud and clear through the night.

The silence was deafening. I frowned, wondering when Daryl had turned off the bike. We waited a few seconds before walking back out in front of the fence. It hadn't been a huge herd, but there were over thirty corpses splattered over the asphalt. I exhaled as I looked down at them and shook my head.

"You guys okay?" Carol called down.

"Fine, just open the damn gates," Daryl snarled back a little harsher than I would have expected him to speak to Carol. It had been a long day however, and this was not how either of us had wanted it to end.

A single light flickered on, illuminating a small circle outside the gates. The gates creaked open behind me, but I was already prowling through the corpses, pulling my knives. Behind me I listened as Daryl righted his bike. I pulled his arrows as I found them, but I left the ones from The Kingdom. I wasn't sure how they dealt with their weapons or their dead but it wasn't my problem. If I thought I was tired before, I was beyond exhausted now. The adrenaline seeped away faster than I expected and I was left feeling shaky and cold.

"What is going on here?" I heard King Ezekiel's voice.

"Holy shit!"

"Jerry," Ezekiel corrected.

I heard Jerry grunt, but he fell silent at his king's command.

I pulled the last knife out and cleaned it off on the tattered remains of the walkers clothes.

"What the hell was that Miguel?" Carol's voice cut through the darkness, harsh and angry.

I hesitated, still crouched over the walker. There was a low snarl to my left. One of the arrows had lodged in the neck and it was pinned beneath some of the other bodies. I slid the knife through the temple contemplating clearing the rest of the herd.

"What business is this you speak of Lady Carol?" Ezekiel demanded.

"He refused to open the gates," Daryl's voice was a rough growl behind me.

I slowly straightened. My eyes firmly on the woods in front of me. The angry voices and noises of civilization behind me were still just distractions. The herd had blindsided us coming out of the dark woods. There was only twenty feet from the edge of the undergrowth to the road here. I was surprised Ezekiel hadn't cleared further into the woods before now. Maybe after tonight he would reconsider his decision.

"Miguel," Ezekiel said in shock. "These are our allies."

"There was a damn herd coming!" Miguel argued. "I tried to warn them!" he snapped defensively. "It isn't my fault they couldn't hear me over their damn motorcycle! Stupid to use one anyway, all that racket probably brought the herd here double time."

"You left us out here," Daryl railed back.

I heard the crack of flesh against flesh and whirled around, prepared to stop Daryl.

"Damn!" Jerry's voice cut through the night.

It wasn't Daryl. Carol stood before a man who I assumed was Miguel gun in one hand, the other still raised like she was thinking of slapping him again. Miguel was cradling his cheek and looking at her in shock. He had gone very still in that way people do when there is a predator staring them down. I cocked my head and watched Carol. It wasn't often she let people see this side of her. It was good the people of The Kingdom started to realize she wasn't someone to be trifled with. Sometimes having a reputation could come back to bite you, but mine had kept me safe more times than I could count. As much as it was difficult to bear sometimes, fear made people hesitate. And I never hesitated.

"Carol!" Ezekiel called in shock. "I will handle this!" he said, stepping between Carol and Miguel. "Lady Jo?" Ezekiel said turning his eyes towards me. "Are you alright?" he asked in genuine concern. "I am truly sorry."

I nodded but wasn't sure I could find the words just yet. I still stood outside the circle of light, a river of corpses between us.

"Miguel, I am astonished you would-"

"Allies or not there is no way I was gonna get myself killed for them. Climb down of this fence like a damn dumbass to help two people who clearly did not need my help in the first place."

"You didn't know that," Carol growled back.

Miguel snorted. "I've seen her in action before," he said motioning towards me vaguely.

"Then you know that the Lady Jo has fought for us in the past. She is among our most trusted allies," Ezekiel said.

Miguel was shaking his head and took a couple steps back. "Clearly she didn't need my help," he said and he swept his arm out to take in the corpses. "And ally or not...I don't trust anyone who willingly turns themself into a monster. How's that any different from Negan?"

I felt like I had been slapped. I looked away from the group of people who were all staring at me. Unfortunately, my eyes only found the piles of walkers lining the street where I had fought, the mounds of gore and blood that pooled around my boots. I heard an angry growl. It wasn't a walker, but I recognized it all the same. My head snapped back up in time to see Daryl lunge for Miguel.

Daryl's fist cracked across Miguel's jaw, sending him to the ground. "You don't know shit about shit!" Daryl yelled and when he took another menacing step towards Miguel, Jerry and Ezekiel put themselves between the two.

Daryl stepped forward again, forcing Jerry to restrain him. 

"Dare," I called in a quiet, but firm voice.

Somehow, even though I knew Daryl's temper would have his blood pounding in his ears, he heard me. He turned to face me and there must have been some emotion I didn't realize on my face. His face softened and he stepped away from them. He shot one last angry look towards Miguel who was climbing to his feet. Daryl stepped out of the circle of light and his face was obscured by shadow. He picked his way across the herd towards me. He reached out and gently touched the side of my face with the tips of his fingers.

"You okay darlin?" he asked in a voice that rumbled low and gravely in his chest.

I nodded, but I was starting to shiver. It hadn't felt cold before, but now that the sweat was drying on my skin I was chilled. "Can we just go home?"

Daryl nodded gruffly. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against my forehead before turning back to the the others. He picked up his bike, putting the kickstand down, and dug through the saddle bag for the notes from Rick. He walked back up to Ezekiel and handed them off. I shuffled to the bike, and waited beside it for Daryl. I was honestly just too tired to deal with anyone else tonight. I had had enough.

<><><><><> 

Jo

It was late when we finally pulled through the gates of Alexandria. I knew better than to drift off, but I had my eyes closed and was snuggled tightly against Daryl's back, my arms wrapped tightly around his waist. He parked the bike and turned it off. I didn't move. His hand dropped down to mine and he gave my fingers a warm squeeze.

"Look," he said, his voice rasping softly in the darkness. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't a-"

I exhaled and squeezed my arms tighter. "Don't apologize," I told him. "That guy was an asshole and Ezekiel wasn't even that upset about it." I assured him.

"What he said-" Daryl started to say and he shook his head. "It ain't true."

I rested my cheek against Daryl's shoulder blade and sighed. Because the asshole guard in the kingdom had absolutely spoken the truth. He had believed his words one hundred percent, and as far as I was concerned he was allowed his own opinion. I was bone weary. I was too tired to care anymore what anyone else thought anymore.  

I didn't blame Daryl for punching Miguel. I wasn't upset about it, but it was obvious Daryl was worried I was. The truth of the matter was that Daryl was always protective of me, but when he got tired or stressed it compounded. That alpha piece in Daryl's brain that insisted he protect me had been in overdrive having me in front of him for the fight. Miguel had been too stupid to recognize that, and he had pushed when he should have backed off. To add to it, he had been dumb enough to do it when Daryl was close enough to hit him. 

We walked into the house together and Rick and Michonne were still up. Rick was standing at the kitchen counter, bent over his pile of papers, pen in hand. Michonne was sitting on the couch in the living room resting. She still looked pretty bad, but she was on the mend. She was doing a better job of being a good patience than I had ever done.

"Hey you guys," Michonne greeted.

I was only half paying attention to her as my focus shifted to Rick. He lifted his eyes from the papers on the counter and picked up a folded square of paper much like the ones we had been delivering all day. I narrowed my eyes as anger surged through me. It was late, we had already had a hell of a day, he couldn't possible think he could ask us to go back out there. 

Michonne said something else and Daryl turned towards her, but I kept my eyes on Rick and his paper.

"Can-" Rick started to say and I shot him a glare to cut him off.

"It's been a long day," I said conversationally. "I'm exhausted." 

Rick's eyes flickered to Daryl behind me. He was going to ask Daryl to do it. And Daryl, no matter how exhausted he was, wouldn't refuse. Rick was going to push Daryl too far. I practically leapt forward, my shoulder sliding in front of Daryl's as I glared Rick down.

Michonne said something more to Daryl and his attention was focused on her and not what I was doing. He could feel the tension in my body and without thinking he skimmed his fingers up and down my arm. Not even fully recognizing what was going on he was trying to soothe me.

Rick pulled back half a step and cocked his head to the side as he stared down at me. He wasn't afraid of me. I don't know if Rick ever really had been, but he recognized my body language and he pulled up frowning. His eyes flickered to Daryl and he licked his lips like he was going to say something. Michonne said something else and Daryl laughed tiredly. I could feel the motion of it in his chest where he was pressed against me. I narrowed my eyes at Rick, making it clear him asking Daryl wasn't an option.

"We'll do the next round of runs in the morning," I said firmly, trying to have Daryl not notice I was trying to protect him. If he noticed he would just get belligerent and insist he could handle it. And knowing how tired I was he would insist I stay behind. I would refuse and it would turn into an epic fight. I didn't want to fight. Not now, not tonight. I wanted to finish what we had started that afternoon in the woods. I wanted a shower and to wrap myself in Daryl and for just five minutes not have to think about what was coming.

I hardened my glare, letting Rick see I wasn't going to budge on this. At the same time I reached back and wound my fingers through Daryl's.

"Yeah," Rick agreed nodding. "Tomorrow sounds great."

I nodded in agreement and flashed him a smile that felt like it had too much teeth.

Rick swallowed and looked back down at his notes. "I'm going back and forth over sending you with The Kingdom or having you go with us to the High Rise...any thoughts?"

I exhaled and nodded, chewing on my lower lip. "I'll stay with Daryl," I said firmly.

Rick looked surprised for a moment but then nodded. He leaned forward and wrote another note on his paper. Daryl gave my hand a squeeze, but I didn't turn around. I didn't want to see the look of pity I was sure he was sending my way. After what happened with The Kingdom tonight it was clear things would go better if I stayed with my family.

"Have you decided where Carl will be?" I asked curiously, because up until now Rick hadn't mentioned it.

Rick glanced up at me, his eyes hard and burning with resolve. "Carl will stay here."

I arched my brows. "Have you spoken to Carl about that?"

Rick threw his pen down on the counter and cross his arms over his chest. "I don't need to because Carl is still a kid, and he is going to do what I tell him."

I pressed my lips together and dipped my chin so he couldn't see my expression. It was like Rick didn't know his son at all.

"He's going to stay here where it's safe with Michonne and Judith."

I cut my eyes over to where Michonne was sitting on the couch. She was giving Rick the same pitying look that matched how I was feeling. I exhaled, realizing this just might be something that fell on my shoulders.

"He's not a kid anymore Rick," I said.

Rick's head snapped up to meet my gaze. I jerked involuntarily at the angry expression on his face. It had been a long time since I had had such a visceral reaction, but Rick could be just as scary and unpredictable as I could at time. "Yes," Rick growled angrily. "He. Is."

I sighed and felt Daryl's heat where he was standing at my back. He and I hadn't discussed this, so I didn't know if he actually agreed with me, but it felt like he had my back, and that was all I needed to push ahead.

"I'm not trying to overstep some kind of line here Rick. You're his dad," I said firmly and Rick nodded, seeming pleased that I was understanding what he was getting at. "But," I began and Rick's eyes immediately hardened once more. "That being said, Carl hasn't been a kid for years. He's more experienced than just about anyone in Alexandria present company excluded. He has insights and I think it's a waste not to ask his opinions on things like this. We have to start grooming the next generation to take over and as much as you may not want to face it, Carl will without doubt be the next leader of Alexandria."

Rick's gaze flickered back and forth between Daryl and I in confusion.

Daryl's voice rasped from just over my shoulder. "It ain't gonna be either one of us. Jo won't do it, and I got too much of a temper."

Rick just shook his head and scrubbed the heels of his hands against his eyes. He leaned forward into them a minute before he nodded. "Yeah," he finally agreed nodding. Then his eyes cut up to meet mine. "But I'm still not letting him come with day after tomorrow. He's too-" Rick dragged off as though he couldn't quite find the right way to describe Carl.

"Headstrong?" I supplied helpfully, a slow smirk stretching across my face.

Rick snorted and nodded. "Exactly."

"He'd be in good company," I said smiling.

Rick chuckled. "Yeah, you're probably right," he agreed. He looked over towards Michonne. I couldn't see what she was thinking with her behind me, but I wasn't willing to look away from Rick, now that I felt like he was seeing things from my perspective. "He still shouldn't come. He isn't ready," he said decisively and then he looked back up to meet my gaze. "He has a lot of experience and he's good with a gun, but he isn't a fighter. He stays here."

I nodded along with Rick so he wouldn't feel like I was disagreeing with him, even though I absolutely did. Carl was every bit a fighter. He just needed practice. "So leave him in charge," I said, my voice firm, leaving no room for Rick to argue.

Rick exhaled and scratched at the stubble growing on his cheeks. "Just-let me think on it, all right Jo?" he asked sounding a little desperate.

I took pity and backed down. "Good night Rick," I said with a sweet smile.

"Good night," Rick grumbled back and looked back down at his papers slightly bewildered.

Behind me I could feel Daryl chuckling silently and decided we should probably get out of here before Rick really started to feel picked on. I pulled Daryl behind me as I headed towards the stairs.

<><><><><>

Jo

I woke up early. It was the morning before the attack and as badly as I wanted to just roll over and go back to sleep, my mind was already racing. Beside me Daryl was still snoring, stretched out on his stomach. The sheet was pooled at his waist. I was tempted to run the tips of my fingers over the planes of his bare back. Part of me wanted to wake him, but he needed his sleep. We had stayed up most of the night, and he had been running himself ragged over the last couple of days.

I slipped out of bed as quietly as possible and dressed in the bathroom. Daryl and I had some things we needed to take care of today, but I wasn't going to wake him up at the crack of dawn, I didn't care what Rick wanted. I was just strapping on the last of my knives when I got a wild hair to head outside and train. It had been a long time since I had a quiet morning to train. When I made my way out to the targets I was surprised to find Carl already out there.

"What are you doing?" I asked him suspiciously. I wondered if he had been eavesdropping last night. I hadn't heard him, but then I wasn't Daryl.

Carl flipped off his knife, it landed about six inches to the right of center. "What does it look like?" he asked in a teasing voice.

I shook my head, but handed him all four of my throwing knives. He flipped them off, and every single one went slightly to the right. He frowned at the target, marched up to it and tried again. Still a little right, but he was getting better and better.

"Do you want to tell me why you are up so early?" I asked. Taking my turn. All of mine hit the center.

"Not really," he replied, grunting as he jerked my knives out. I still had greater velocity when I threw than he did, but that had little to do with strength and everything to do with technique. I wanted to correct him, to help him, but I had a feeling today that wasn't what he was looking for.

I threw another knife. I did a forward roll and threw another from my butt on the ground. It was slightly off, but not enough it would have made a difference. "So it has nothing to do with Enid?" I asked calmly without looking at him. I snapped off two more knives from the ground before I turned to look at him, lifting an eyebrow.

He wouldn't look at me, but his ears were slightly pink.

"You have a terrible poker face," I told him and I climbed to my feet and stalked towards the targets.

"Does dad know?" he asked after several minutes.

"Not that I'm aware of," I told him honestly.

He nodded uncomfortably. "Does anyone else?" he asked sheepishly.

"I would assume Daryl does, but he never said anything about it to me...not that he would." And he wouldn't have. Daryl would be the last person to rat Carl out to his dad over something like this. It would make him too uncomfortable to even talk about it. Without a doubt Daryl just turned a blind eye and kept moving.

Carl nodded in agreement. We threw knives for a while longer with me making gentle suggestions here and there, but mainly he just needed practice. "You're getting better," I encouraged. "We should find you your own set of knives. That's really all this is," I said motioning towards the target. His last set had all sank within inches of the center. 

"Then I'll be as good as you?" he teased.

I snorted. "Just slow down there junior," I chuckled slapping the brim of his hat with the flat side of one of my knives. "Once you throw them a thousand thousand times...wear them all the time, sleep in them, know instinctively where they are and how to-"

"Yeah, yeah," Carl grumbled walking back towards the target. "I get it." He pulled the knives out and hesitated, his face falling once more into something more serious. "So you aren't going to say anything about it?" he asked. "The Enid thing?"

I turned to him, lifting a brow. "What exactly would I say?"

"I-I don't know-" Carl stammered.

I shook my head. "You're seventeen Carl. As far as I'm concerned you're an adult. You've faced more things than most adults in this world. You know what the score is Carl. I'm not going to lecture you." I told him, and I wasn't. "I'm glad you're happy." I told him.

He nodded, but he still looked uncomfortable. "I don't think dad will be cool with it."

I laughed out loud. "You know Carl...no matter how old you get, or how much of an adult, there will always be certain people in your life that make you feel like a little kid who's afraid of getting in trouble," I was smiling as I spoke. "You know, before the turn I had a house, and a family, and my mom could call me and tell me I needed her to call me back and I would still run through all of the possible things I could be in trouble for," I chuckled and shook my head. Then I stopped and frowned as I realized what I had done.

"What's wrong?" Carl asked, noticing my sudden change.

I shook my head. "I just haven't...I don't know...smiled or reminisced...I don't know," I said again and I shook my head in surprise. It was a weird thought that despite all of this going on around us, things could still be getting better somehow...I could still be getting better.

"What were you like?" Carl asked, pausing. "You know, before?"

"Before? Before the outbreak?" I asked.

Carl gestured to the knives strapped to me. "Before all of this."

"You knew me before."

"Yeah but even back then you were intense, you just didn't have the training yet. All you had was that golf club," he said chuckling at the memory.

"It was a putter," I told him seriously.

He rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean. What were you like?"

I swallowed and frowned. "Well...I'm not really sure, I mean I was a student and a mother and-and a wife..." I cleared my throat uncomfortably and rubbed a hand over the back of my neck. "Do you want to spar?" I asked.

It wasn't something I normally did, it wasn't until recently I believed I was capable of sparring without significant risk to my opponent. But I was feeling okay today, and I would feel better if I was able to show Carl a few things. He was still wiry and quick, which meant my style of fighting would suit him more than his dad's or Daryl's.

"You're changing the subject," Carl said eyeing me disapprovingly. "Anyway, that's what you were, not what you were like," Carl said.

I hesitated then, because he was right. I tried to think back, tried to remember what I was really like. I knew the things I had done and things I had liked, but it wasn't like I had just changed over night. Everyone changed.

"What were you like?" I asked, partially to buy myself some time and partially because I was curious how he would answer.

"Carl!" Rick's voice came from across the street.

Carl and I turned together to face Rick. He was striding towards us, his face serious. I cleared my throat. "I think your dad wants to talk to you."

"About what?" Carl asked, glancing towards me.

I shrugged and left the two of them alone.

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Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed the update. I'm sorry it's been so long since I updated. I have been having some technical troubled with wattpad and I'm still struggling a little bit with this new season!

On a side note I've recently been selected for a very exclusive education opportunity for my job. It's a three month course so the next few months will be a little busy for me. I will still continue to update, but they may be like this one, every two weeks or so. I really appreciate you guys sticking with me. You are the best readers ever!

If you haven't checked out my other Walking Dead fanfic Last One Fighting I suggest you do! It's a Jo AU featuring Negan and The Saviors.

Happy Reading!