Hey guys! Hope you enjoy this one!

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Negan

I sat on the damn catwalk until long after my ass fell asleep and my shoulder went numb. I should have gone inside hours ago, but Jo was out. I probably could have left once she fell asleep, but she was leaning against me and I didn't have anywhere I had to be. She didn't sleep very often and for some reason she could when I was there. She shifted, tucking herself against me, one of her arms snaking around my waist to get closer. I bit back a chuckle that probably would have woke her up. The last couple days she had been working hard to keep distance between us. She would be so pissed if she woke up and realized she was practically cuddling in my lap.

The wind picked up and she shivered. She shifted, trying to get closer and stay warm. When she shifted again, scowling in her sleep I decided to move her before she woke up. She needed the sleep after everything that had happened today. I needed her fighting fit tomorrow. So I wasn't doing it for her, I was doing it for me. That's what I kept telling myself at least.

I moved slowly, trying not to wake her as I scooped her up, tucking her against my chest. She felt tiny in my arms, lighter than I had expected. She was larger than life when she was awake, kicking ass and taking names, but now...now she felt small and vulnerable. That would piss her off too. Even knowing I was thinking it would make her want to kick my ass. I couldn't help the broad smile as I thought of how mad she would be. I had to be some kind of twisted to be so turned on by that angry scowl of hers.

She shifted in her sleep, her arms coming up unconsciously to wind around my neck as she burrowed her face into my neck. Her breath was warm against my skin and she made a sound in the back of her throat. I tried not to think too hard about it, but it was tempting as hell to bring her straight up to my room. She had however, made it perfectly clear how she felt about being one of my girls. She wasn't interested. She didn't share. Hard to blame her. I didn't share either.

Now if I could just convince myself I was fine with it everything would be gravy. I needed to think of her as a resource, not the incredibly sexy badass, strong yet maddeningly vulnerable woman in my arms.

She had lost it today, came completely off the rails like I hadn't seen before. And goddamn if it wasn't something to behold. It scared her, but if she could get over that and use it. I shook my head at the thought. If I wasn't careful I'd be the one kneeling.

I shifted her in my arms, reaching for the doorknob. I hadn't thought about it being locked. If it was there was zero chance of me having the self control not to bring her to my room. I mean it would be the only noble thing to do. What the hell else was I going to do? Bring her back outside? She could have my bed, I would sleep on my couch.

The doorknob twisted easily, my whole line of thought forgotten in the face of the unlocked door. I adjusted her again so she would be more comfortable, frowning. She shouldn't be leaving her door unlocked like that. Once inside I kicked the door closed behind us. I glanced towards the nail next to the door and spotted both sets of keys still hanging there, just like they were in every room.

Some unnamed thing in my chest tightened. I worked my ass off to make sure everyone followed the rules, but without the threat of Lucille I wouldn't trust half my guys anywhere near Jo. She might be able to fight, but she still needed to be smart. She was too far away from everyone. It would be too easy for someone to surprise and overpower her.

I carried her over to the unmade bed and laid her down, pulling the covers up over her. She would be more comfortable without her boots, jacket and shoulder rig, but there was no way she would stay sleeping through me pulling off her boots. And I didn't really fancy getting knifed over it when she did wake up.

What I really needed to do was keep my distance and stay hands-off. It was too easy to think about her in a very non-business like fashion when we were this close. Of course carrying her to bed wasn't exactly a hands-off approach, but she was a valuable resource. I was just cultivating that resource. Nothing more.

Just a resource.

Sighing in defeat, I tucked her blankets tighter around her and she made a low noise of pleasure in the back of her throat. I closed my eyes and forced myself to step away. I clicked off the lamp near her bed and walked back into her kitchen.

I opened her fridge and frowned at the empty shelves. I grunted in annoyance and closed the door. She said she wasn't willing to take anything more without earning. I hadn't realized that meant food as well. That same, primal feeling in my chest tightened again. It bothered me that she didn't have food here. Despite how capable she was, the need to take care of her was nearly overpowering tonight. Maybe it was just from everything that happened today.

Just a resource.

We were leaving on the run in the morning. I would be sure to pack food and make sure she ate something while we were out there. I'd just tell her it was part of the deal going on runs.

There was a pad of paper on the counter, I wrote her a quick note, reminding her what time tomorrow and left it on her night stand.

To ease my mind I quickly cleared the small room. Checking the bathroom, the closet and under and behind anything where someone might hide. Once I was done I felt like a complete idiot, but there was no way I would have been able to sleep without knowing I had left her someplace safe. The reason she couldn't sleep was because it made her vulnerable. She trusted me enough to sleep when I was there. That wasn't a trust I took lightly.

I was going to have to figure out how to say something to her tomorrow about locking her door. I just didn't know how to do it without sounding like an overprotective douche.

I was just leaving when her door opened. I swung around, not expecting anyone. I had a brief moment to wonder if the reason her door was unlocked in the middle of the night was because she was screwing around with some guy here. My hand tightened into a fist at the thought.

Merle Dixon came swaggering through the door like he owned the place. His eyes narrowed when he saw me and his gaze cut over to where Jo was sleeping behind me.

"Boss," he greeted tightly, there was a hard edge of suspicion to his voice. Hard to blame him really, I was a man standing ten feet from the bed of his favorite niece in the middle of the night. At least I assumed Jo was his favorite. Hard to imagine anyone willingly subjecting themselves to Kate's attitude. More power to that poor sap Kate had conned into dating her.

Merle Dixon himself was also a real piece of work, and if he didn't love his nieces so much I would have kicked his ass out a long time ago. He followed the rules, right to the letter, but nothing beyond that. He should have been one of my soldiers, but he didn't believe in the system and he wasn't willing to kneel. His only loyalty was to his family. I had no doubt if the surly son of a bitch still had both hands he would be giving me a run for my money running this place. But, he kept his head down and worked hard, racking up points faster than most workers and taking care of his two nieces.

"Dixon," I said nodding to him.

His arms were loose at his sides, a bag of food in his good hand. I never had asked how he lost his left hand, but I had a feeling it was a hell of a story. I had always been convinced old Merle and I could be best buddies if we could ever get over the overwhelming urge to kill one another.

Dixon kept his wary eyes on me, but I could tell he wanted to check on Jo. He was refusing to break eye contact. Not wanting to be the first to look away.

"Don't worry dad," I joked, flashing him an aggressive smile that had too much teeth to be friendly. "I'm just dropping her off. No hanky panky," I promised, holding my hands up in mock surrender. "It was a big day."

Merle's voice was a low rasp, as though he were trying not to wake his niece. "She hurt?" he asked his eyes finally flashing over to Jo.

I glanced back at Jo and shook my head dramatically. "Nope. Returned her in one piece and everything."

I could tell by the look on his face he wanted to push for more. But I was in charge here, and Dixon had always known just how far he could push without suffering serious repercussions. I sauntered towards the door, flashing him another aggressive smile just because.

"Negan," Dixon called after me.

I stopped just outside the door and turned back to face him, lifting my eyebrows in surprise.

He followed me out into the hall, pulling the door mostly closed behind himself. He had to look up at me to stare me in the face, but when he did there was a defiant set to his jaw. There wasn't much of a family resemblance between any of the Dixon's but Jo and Merle sure scowled like they were related.

Merle cleared his throat and his voice came out sharper than before. "Barbie ain't just a weapon for you to use," he snapped. "That ain't why I brought her here."

I cocked my head to the side. "Careful," I sang, he was treading onto dangerous territory. "She is whatever I say she is," I told him, my voice hard and leaving no room for negotiations.

Merle met my eyes fearlessly. "That's what that other asshole did to her. She wasn't like this before and I won't let it happen again. Now I know Barbie thinks this is the only option to keep her little sister safe. But I will not hesitate to drag her and Katie back out onto the road and take our chances before I let you or anyone else do that to her again," Merle drawled dangerously.

I cocked my head to the side. Part of me wanted to punish him for being disrespectful. "You don't let me do anything Dixon, you're nothing but a worker," I reminded him. The other part of me however, respected the man for having the balls to do what he felt he had to in order to protect his family. "But then again Jo doesn't let me do anything either. Don't you worry. As bad as it was before, your niece can protect herself now."

Dixon didn't look away, didn't relent. "Don't mean it still ain't my job to look out for her," he said firmly and then he turned to go back inside the room.

I ran my tongue along my teeth. Wondering if I was going to let him keep the last word. Normally, being challenged like this would piss me off to my core, but I was glad someone else was looking out for Jo. Judging by the smell Dixon had been bringing his niece food. Probably trying to sneak it into her fridge when she wasn't there to notice. The sly bastard.

"Make sure you lock the damn door behind you," I called after him and I turned and left. 

I was restless and I walked the halls for a while, trying to figure out why I couldn't just go back to my room and get some shut eye before the run in the morning. My legs kept trying to drag me back down Jo's hallway, but I forced myself to stay away. I had to trust that Dixon locked up behind like I told him too. I didn't need to check.

I turned down my hallway and opened the first door on the right. It was my girl's lounge. There were two doors on the right side of the room leading to their bedrooms, and a door on the left that connected the lounge to my room.

Frankie and Tanya were sitting at the bar together, sharing a bottle of wine. I pressed my lips together thoughtfully. They were both gorgeous. Dressed in tight black dresses that did little to hide all of their assets I was extremely familiar with.

"Negan," Frankie breathed when she saw me. They both dipped their chins respectfully. Tanya's shoulders stayed hunched as I swaggered into the room. I walked to the bar and poured myself a lowball of scotch, neat. I swirled the liquid around the glass thoughtfully. Two beautiful and very willing women sitting less than five feet away and all I could think of was Jo. I knocked the scotch back, draining the glass.

Frankie moved around the side of the bar, coming up beside me with the bottle to refill my glass. She set the bottle aside and moved towards me. She had always been more assertive than most of my wives, coming onto me while the others waited for me to show interest. Frankie slid her hand inside my jacket, tailing her fingers over my chest seductively. She raked her nails across my abs which was something I usually found sexy as hell. On any normal night I would have had her up against the bar already.

Instead, I stood impassively beneath her hand like some pussy whipped asshole. She wasn't doing anything for me tonight. I glanced towards Tanya, but I wasn't interested in what she had to offer either. Frankie's fingers had found my belt and she was reaching for the buckle either not noticing or not caring that I wasn't participating.

I knocked back the rest of my scotch and stepped back, pulling away from Frankie. I slammed my glass down on the bar in frustration and both women jumped. I was surprised the glass didn't break. I stalked out of the room and slammed by bedroom door closed behind me without a word. 

I tried to sleep, but ended up tossing and turning the rest of the night. I was in a hell of a mood when I stormed out of my room in the morning. Amber was the only one already awake. She was sitting at the table in front of the breakfast spread. As soon as I opened the door she reached for a mug to pour me a cup of coffee. She handed it to me silently, keeping her eyes down. It wasn't like her and I wondered what the others had told her about the night before. Either way, I found I didn't really give a shit. I took the coffee from her, and took two pieces of toast to eat on my way to the front gate.

Jo met me at the gate at eight a.m. on the dot. Not that I expected her to be late. She was so damn intense about everything she did, it wasn't surprising she would be exact about this too. She was wearing all of her gear and carrying her leather jacket. I ran my eyes up and down her and made a mental note to promote Regina for her genius move of putting Jo in leather pants. She was wearing a low cut black shirt that I was finding more distracting than it should have been. I doubted Regina did it on purpose, but she had made Jo look every bit of the sexy badass she was.

I turned away before Jo caught me looking and turned my attention back to the bike I was kneeling beside. I tucked the supplies in the saddle bag and set Lucille across the handle bars.

"What's this?" she asked, her eyes narrowed suspiciously at the bike.

I turned around to face her, a smirk already stretching across my face. I knew she wasn't going to like it when I decided to take it. There were other vehicles, but for just the two of us to go on the run a motorcycle was the most manueverable.

"What's the matter Hot Friend?" I asked lifting an eyebrow. "You scared of motorcycles?"

She looked from the bike and back to me and licked her lips. "No," she responded quickly. "I just...I thought if we were going on a run, it would be better to have a truck or van."

I smiled at her and it was for real. She thought she was so good at hiding her emotions, but I saw straight through her. "This isn't a supply run," I said leaning towards her. "We're checking the crossroads. It's more like a patrol run," I said. I climbed on the bike, kicked up the stand and started it. It roared to life.

She stood beside me her hands were still hanging loose at her sides, but I could see how tense she was about this. I met her eyes and my gaze dropped to where her teeth were worrying her lower lip. She noticed and quickly pressed her lips together.

"You coming or what?" I asked revving the engine.

She opened her mouth to respond and I revved it again. She scowled at me in annoyance and stalked towards me. She pulled on her jacket, stabbing her arms into the sleeves violently enough I had no doubt how pissed she was. She climbed on behind me, trying very hard not to touch me more than necessary. She grunted in frustration and I bit back a grin. I had purposefully chosen a bike that would force her to hold onto me.

"Hold on," I called over my shoulder to her.

I couldn't help it, it was too much fun teasing her. She tried to keep space between us, placing her hands on the side of my waist lightly, and holding herself back off of me by several inches.

I looked to the man at the gate and nodded to him. He pulled the gate open and I revved up the bike, peeling out fast enough it threw her off balance. She lurched forward to hold on. Her chest slammed against my back and her hands locked together around my waist.

Just a resource.

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Jo

He was doing this on purpose, he had to be. There was no good reason why we couldn't have taken one of the trucks. We didn't have to take a motorcycle. He was just doing it to watch me squirm. Or feel me squirm was probably more like it. He was driving like this on purpose too, forcing me to hold on to him tighter than I wanted. My chest was pressed up against his back, my arms were short enough that there was no way for me to lock them together around him without being pressed against his back hard enough I thought I could feel the pounding of his heart. Or maybe it was mine.

I shifted again, trying to put more space between us when he reached down, covering my hands with one of his. I flinched at the feeling of his warm hands covering mine.

"Would you stop squirming!" he called loudly over his shoulder. His gruff tone at odds with the gentleness of his hand closing over mine.

I instantly stilled, holding myself like a statue. I could feel the rumble of a laugh in his chest as he released my hands and took the handlebars again. I held myself perfectly still, trying hard not to touch him anymore than was necessary. I tried very hard not to notice the flat plane of his stomach or the muscle I could feel in his back and shoulders.

I swallowed and pinched my eyes shut as I tried very hard not to think about how warm and solid he felt beneath me, or what it must have been like for him to carry me to my room last night. He hadn't mentioned it yet, but I was betting he was just biding his time before he threw that one in my face. 

"You could try enjoying the ride," he called back a few moments later.

I opened my eyes, scowling at his words. I peaked up over his shoulder and realized there really was something out here to enjoy. I had been so wrapped up in not letting myself get distracted by him I was entirely missing my first trip outside of The Sanctuary.

We were on a road that wound through the woods. It was a strange moment for me to realize it was fall. It had taken several days to get to The Sanctuary and I felt like I should have noticed that somehow. The leaves were all changing colors around us. It was absolutely beautiful. Peeking over his shoulder pressed me more snuggly against him, but I was able to feel the wind in my face. Unconsciously my arms tightened as I breathed in the air. I could smell the forest around us, the dirt and trees as the wind blew into my face. I breathed it in and without even realizing it my body began to relax.

An unknown tension faded from my limbs and I tipped my head back, closing my eyes. Out here, in this moment nothing mattered but the feel of the wind and I allowed myself to revel in the solid warmth of him.

My eyes snapped open as the bike slowed. I looked around, but aside from the fact that it was an intersection there didn't appear to be anything special about this spot.

Negan parked the bike and held it up, glancing over his shoulder at me expectantly. Taking the hint I swung my leg over and climbed off. He followed. I kept my back to him, watching the woods as he dug around in the saddle bags. I didn't see any biters but my hearing was still a little off after the roar of the bike. It made me feel insecure and I let my fingers dangle so they were touching the tops of the knives at my thigh.

"Here," he said and I glanced over my shoulder at him. He was holding a handgun out to me.

I frowned down at it and then looked back up at him, lifting a brow. What in the hell did he think I was going to do with that?

He snorted and shook his head. He stalked towards me, his eyes intense. "You shoot people with it," he said, holding it out again.

"I'm good," I responded and turned to look back at the forest. There was nothing I could do with that gun that I could do better with the arsenal of knives I was wearing.

He moved then, and it was faster than I expected. He grabbed the front of my belt and jerked me towards him. I stumbled forward a step because it was honestly the last thing I had expected him to do. I reached my left hand forward to catch myself against his chest, but my right was instinctively going for a knife.

Without hesitation or fear he slapped my right hand away from my knives and shoved the gun into the empty holster under my left armpit. He stepped away from me seamlessly and started walking away, leaving me staring after him.

"Ass," I muttered under my breath, doing my best to sound upset so he wouldn't notice how rapidly my heart was thundering in my chest.

"I'll feel better going up if I know you have a gun along with your knives down here," he called back to me.

"Going up?" I asked in confusion.

He swung back around to look at me and then pointed upwards towards one of the trees along the side of the road. I lifted my hand as I squinted into the sun to see what looked like an improvised deer stand twice as high as it should be up the tallest tree.

"Keep those beautiful eyes open Hot Friend," Negan called as he grabbed the first wrung and pulled himself up. "I don't fancy getting treed by a bunch of those undead bastards today."

I snorted and shook my head, turning my back to him so I could watch our surroundings. The road was quiet and deserted in all four directions.

"I take it this is the crossroads," I said unnecessarily.

Negan grunted in confirmation and kept climbing. Once he was up top I turned to watch him. He picked up a pair of binoculars that were attached to the stand by a length of rope. He used the binoculars to look down the roads in every direction.

"One of them," he responded. He watched each way for several minutes before he seemed satisfied and turned.

"One?" I called up to him. "Exactly how many are there?"

"Six," he called back.

I blinked at his words. "That'll take us all day," I observed.

Negan grunted as he climbed down. "You got somewhere to be Hot Friend?"

I made a noise of annoyance in the back of my throat. "Why do you call me that?" I asked, my back was still to him, my eyes glued on the trees.

"Are we not friends?" his voice was closer than I had expected, just behind me ear and it made me jump.

He let out a low chuckle and I tightened my jaw. I was glad the question was rhetorical because I doubted my ability to respond civilly.

"Are you not smoking hot?" he asked and this time his voice was a low growl.

I stepped away and whirled around to glare at him. I had hoped for intimidation, but instead he threw back his head and laughed. His eyes were dancing with amusement and he turned back to the bike.

"Let's move Hot Friend," he called climbing onto it. "We've got places to be."

The ride to the next crossroads was tense and silent, at least on my part. Negan felt as relaxed as even beneath my hands, as hard as I was trying not to notice. When he parked the bike at the next one and we climbed off I paced around the intersection.

"So you check these every day?" I asked.

Negan snorted. "I don't," he said as though the idea were ridiculous. "Normally we have someone posted during business hours, but since I had to pull everyone in I can only send out the people I trust," he explained, his tone light.

I couldn't understand how he never seemed to get upset. No matter how much I scowled at him and growled and stomped he just laughed it off. The only times I had ever truly seen him angry was when someone's safety was being put on the line. But you didn't get to be feared by being even keeled all the time. Which made me wonder if this was something that he had developed once he was in control of The Sanctuary. The Governor had ruled through outright fear, but maybe that was what made Negan even more formidable. People knew to be afraid of him even through the easy smiles and the jokes.

"We watch the crossroads, make sure there's no herds coming our way and no other communities."

"Other communities?" I couldn't keep the surprise out of my voice as I spun around to look up at him.

His eyes met mine and he nodded. "Yeah, there are a few of them in the greater DC area."

I sucked in a breath and looked away, turning my attention back to the forest. I hadn't realized there were more. It had come as a shock to realize Negan's group existed.

"We gotta keep an eye out for them. Not all of them are very friendly. We've had more than a few try to come and take our shit," Negan explained as he climbed down. "A few of the others we've made agreements with."

"Like trade?" I asked, still trying to work out how this was all possible. How there could still be this many people left alive. In Georgia it had seemed like the end. Like Woodbury was the last stronghold of civilization. Or maybe that was just what Phillip had wanted everyone to think, so they would feel like they had no other options.

Negan shrugged. "Sort of. We provide protection to a few close by."

"Protection?" I asked cocking my head to the side.

Negan nodded and headed back towards the bike. "Like I said, a few of them have tried to come and take what we've got. The Sanctuary is equipped to handle that sort of thing, but not everybody is. So, we set up a trade. In exchange for protection and our help whenever they need it, they make drop off's of supplies and some of the food a few of them are growing."

Negan slung his leg over the bike. I moved to climb on behind him, but I was shaking my head. "I can't believe there's enough people left for this..." I muttered under my breath.

"Oh there's plenty of assholes left out there trying to take what isn't theirs," Negan responded and I could tell by the set to his shoulders and the tightness in his voice this was an issue he took very seriously.

I nodded but was still feeling overwhelmed. "When I was-" I started to say, but stopped and instead moved to climb onto the back of the bike.

Negan reached out catching my arm. I tensed, but didn't flinch back from him. "What?" he asked, his expression serious for once.

I licked my lips and drew in a breath. "I just," I shrugged, not really sure how to say it right.

He studied my face for a minute. "Jo," he said in a low voice laced with understanding, "there's no one out here but us. You can talk to me."

And, for that very same unidentifiable reason I could sleep around him, I knew that I could talk to him. "When I was there, it felt like...like it was the end of the world. Like Woodbury was all that was left and if we left..." I shrugged, looking down. "I realize now it was just part of his con," I said, and I sniffed. "I should have seen through it then. I would have saved us a lot of heartbreak...I was an idiot."

Negan reached out with his other hand and caught my other arm, holding me gently but also forcing me to look him full in the face. "Hey," he said and his voice was stern instead of the gentleness I had been expecting in the moment.

I wanted to squirm under the intensity of his gaze. His dark eyes held mine and burned with an anger I was pretty sure was for my benefit.

"It was his job to protect the people he was responsible for," Negan growled. "And he didn't. You aren't responsible for what he did. Not to anyone else and certainly not to you."

I nodded, as tears burned the back of my eyes.

He continued to stare me down, forcing me to hold the eye contact and letting me see just how sincere he was about this.

"Okay?" he asked.

I nodded again and sniffed. I wanted to turn away from him, to hide the tangle of emotions I couldn't control or even begin to sort out. But I couldn't, I wouldn't. Not when he was being this open and honest with me. I owed him at least that much.

"Okay then," he said and he loosened his grip. Letting his hands slide down my arms rather than just releasing me outright. He gave my hands a gentle squeeze before releasing me. "Let's go sweetheart."

I climbed onto the bike behind him, my emotions feeling even more uncertain than usual. He was right about one thing. There was no one out here but us. No one to see or judge and so, despite everything, I wrapped my arms securely around Negan's waist and let myself lean into him.

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So what did you guys think? I really hope you enjoyed it. I just wanted to say how much I appreciate all of your support and encouragement with this story. It has become so much more than I would have ever dreamed. I sincerely hope you continue to enjoy it.