chapter twenty two: together but completely separated
1274 words

The fire was the greatest reprieve in the nighttime. It was warm, a guiding light to pull the group through the hell the past few hours had been. It was a little comfort, nothing more than a fleeting thing really but each and every one of them were willing to take it with greedy hands. The wood Daryl and Lin found was dry, perfect to keep the blaze going. Each person held onto each other. Hershel held his daughters. Glenn had Maggie's hand captive. Lori had one full side pressed against Carl, her hand over Lin's in the leaves. It was a thread, the bond of the living between them all.

"We're not safe with him- keeping something like that from us," Carol expressed her doubts to Daryl and while it was probably meant to be a conversation between the two of them, she wasn't exactly whispering. "Why do you need him? He's just gonna pull you down."

Lin didn't worry about Daryl was going to say in return. She worried only about the fate of the group, the rest of the world around them too.

"No. Rick's done alright by me." Daryl broke a few of the smaller sticks to add to the center of the fire.

"You're his henchman and I'm a burden. You deserve better." Carol was scared, they all were.

"What do ya want?" Daryl questioned, not able to tell where she was going with her attempt at convincing him.

"A man of honor." It was such a backhanded compliment, a sting at Rick and a praise to Daryl.

"Rick has honor." Daryl defended, standing up from beside Carol. Lin watched him go then searched for Rick in the darkness. He was close by, just behind one of the stone walls. He needed the space from the group but she knew that he could still hear them. There wasn't any way he couldn't.

"I think we should take our chances," Maggie suggested to Glenn. Lin shut her eyes and hung her head down, stretching her neck forward.

"Don't be foolish," Hershel warned his eldest daughter. "There's no food, no fuel, no ammo." He just reiterated how helpless they were. In the faraway darkness, leaves rustled, a telltale sign of movement. Beth shot up instantly, all of her nerves on edge at the thought of there being something out there.

"What was that?"

Lin brought her head up, the strain in her neck aching enough that it reminded her that she was still awake. She looked to Daryl, swinging her bow up and around her arm. "Could be anything," Daryl stated. Everyone stood, ready to run if they had to. "Could be a raccoon, could be a possum."

"Walker," Glenn finished when Daryl didn't want to. Lin pulled an arrow from her quiver, the tip still red with walker blood. Rick emerged in the opening of the walls, his own senses on high alert.

"We need to leave. What are we waiting for?" Carol asked. Lin kept her eyes moving from tree to tree, each black figure fooling her and making her think it was a walker. Survival was making them paranoid.

"Carol we don't have anywhere to go," Lin said, keeping her voice void of any emotion. If a fight started now it was all over.

"Which way?" Glenn couldn't tell where the noise had come from. Lin gestured over as Maggie pointed.

"It came from over there."

"Back from where we came," Beth stood between her sister and her father.

"The last thing we need is for everyone to be running off in the dark," Rick jumped back into the fray, his tone harsh. "We don't have vehicles. No one's traveling on foot." Another branch snap, another moment of panic.

"Don't panic," Hershel tried to sooth the situation but the longer they stayed like this, the longer the doubts had to grow, the harder it was going to be for him to.

"I'm not sitting here, waiting for another herd to blow through." Maggie sounded on the verge of tears. "We need to move, now."

"No one is going anywhere." At the way Rick spoke, the anger that bubbled over the surface, it had Lin whirling around to face her brother in law.

"Do something," Carol pleaded.

"I am doing something! I'm keeping this group together, alive." Lin noticed the way Lori pulled Carl tighter. "I've been doing that all along, no matter what. I didn't ask for this. I killed my best friend for you people, for christ's sake!" There was the bomb and Rick had just dropped it. Lin had been right. Part of her hated that she was, simply because of the look on Carl's face as Rick confessed to the murder of Shane.

"You saw what he was like, how he pushed me, how he compromised us, how he threatened us." Rick looked to Lori who wouldn't meet his eyes. Lin's arm fell from where she'd been holding it up, all her attention now on every word Rick spoke. "He staged the whole Randall thing, led me out to put a bullet in my back. He gave me no choice." Lori shook her head and collapsed down into her son. She'd loved Shane, in a way. She'd loved both Rick and Shane for different reasons. "He was my friend, but he came after me." The silence between Rick's sentences was enough for everyone to hear Carl crying. "My hands are clean."

More of that silence, the kind where no one knew what to say, what to do. Lin felt Shane's gun burn against the skin of her back. She wanted to get rid of it, throw it into the lake behind them and never look at it again.

"Maybe you people are better off without me. Go ahead." Rick turned to look away. "I say there's a place for us, but maybe it's just another pipe dream. Maybe I'm fooling myself again. Why don't you go and find out yourself? Send me a postcard." Lin had never been afraid of Rick, never in her life. He'd always been a sweetheart, hugging her sideways when he picked Lori up on dates, bringing her a dessert when he bought Lori one. She'd never been afraid of him before but this Rick before her had her taking a step back. Daryl watched her movements, wary of her reaction.

"Go on, there's the door. You can do better? Let's see how far you get." No one spoke a word; no one moved a muscle. "No takers? Fine. But get one thing straight- you're staying, this isn't a democracy anymore."

Rick said each word like he meant it. They were like bullets, piercing, hurting, aching, wounding. Lin swallowed around the lump in her throat. The peace they'd found in the farm was gone. That sense of normalcy, the idea that they didn't have to worry about how the world really was shattered like glass. This was the reality they had to live in now, the way they had to adapt to survive. Survival was all that mattered now, no matter what it took.

Lin slipped her arrow back into her quiver, the threat in the woods long forgotten. She reached for Shane's gun, pressing it into Rick's hand. She knew he'd recognize it. He took it without a word and dropped it down into the leaves where it would be forgotten. That part of their lives was over, long gone. What lied ahead was unknown, the worst kind of mystery and the only thing they could do to prepare was try to survive and that was easier said than done.

an: so part one is done and its 109,920 words and that's just season two and like half of season one. this is about to be the longest fic i've ever written. to put it into perspective, the prisoner of azkaban is 107,253 words long. ALSO guess who forgot to update this past tuesday somehow so there's going to kinda be a double update tonight bc it's the mid season finale. but wow i love line and daryl so much and they're not even really together yet but oh man im so excited. i also need to not watch the new season while writing because then i confuse the new daryl dynamic with season three daryl. because darlin is going to go through a whole lot between season three and season ten lemme tell you.

todays meme is a little sad but oh well. i hope you guys enjoy this part, watch the mid-season finale!! and ill see you in the next part of this story (part being like season 3-4)!!!