1 month later...
The tragedy of the school shooting still hung heavy over everybody's heads, the school was still shut and the kids were still terrified. Some tried to hold events to make everything better, but it just made everything worse.

Becky hadn't stopped, ever since she got out of hospital she'd just been planning her best friends funerals. She couldn't stop in fear that things would get too much, in fear she'd go back to the drugs. She's been so distant, just focusing on getting the funerals planned, wanting every last detail to be perfect. She's spent most of her time in the basement, not wanting to be seen or spoke to by anybody or anything.

Sasha is trying to keep going, she's trying so hard just to keep moving but she's struggling. Becky has practically shut herself out from the world and Sasha feels like she's losing one of the only friends she's got and she knows after everything she can't lose Becky too.

The other day the girls had their belongings returned to them and neither has built up the courage to look at them, not wanting to see the clothes soaked in their best friends blood. They both often spent time thinking about them, but Becky tried to block it out because she couldn't face it. She didn't feel strong enough to face it.

Seth couldn't do anything and he felt helpless, he understands that its not his job to fix a broken person, he understands that Becky needs to heal herself and that he needs to look after himself but it didn't stop him from worrying, worrying that he was going to lose Becky too and there would be nothing he can do to stop that.

Becky
I sat in Seth's basement after another sleepless night just planning their funerals, everything needed to be just the way they wanted it. They had such a horrible ending, they deserve a good send off. Fuck, I can't even believe I'm doing this...planning my friends funerals at 18. This is not fair, none of this is fair.

"Becky?" I heard Seth's voice and I flinched. "Please go away..." He continued to walk down the steps and I started to panic. "You can't spend all your time down here Becky, it's not good for your health." He stopped walking and I turned to face him and his face dropped, I must look a mess. I haven't slept since god knows when, I haven't been able to face anything so I haven't showered. "I need to plan these funerals, I need to get them done." He shook his head. "Becky their families are planning their funerals, we just had a letter through the door. Charlottes is today."

"No...no...I was planning them, I was almost done they were going to be perfect!"

"Becky, please just calm down. Getting worked up isn't going to help anything!"

"So everything I did, all those days I've spent down here planning has been for nothing. So I've just wasted my time...everything I've done is pointless."

Seth
She turned away from me and she grabbed the papers she had spread across the table, starting to rip them up. "No becky stop!" I rushed over to her and I pulled her away from the funeral plans. "Shhhhh...it's okay I'm here now...just breathe..." She fought against my grip, wrestling to get away but I just held her tightly. Soon she stopped fighting me and she fell into my embrace, hiding her face in my neck. "I'm so sorry..." She fell apart in my arms, her anger melting into sadness as I just held her. "It's okay...I know how hard this has been, how hard its going to be."

"I can't do this anymore Seth..."

"Yes you can, you've got a beautiful daughter upstairs who needs her mother and you've got me and Sasha...please Becky don't shut us out. We need you too..." She looked up at me with teary eyes. "I'm sorry...you are grieving too and I just dumped Millie on you...I'm so sorry..." She wrapped her own arms tightly around me and the papers she was still clutching fell from her grip. "Do you want to go to Charlottes funeral?" I heard her clear her throat before looking up at me once more. "Yeah...I need to say goodbye my way...the least she deserves from me is this..."

"I'll take Millie out for a walk, just to give you some time to get ready."

"Thank you Seth, thank you so much. I love you..." Thats the first time Becky has said that to me since that horrific day. "I love you too Becky and I promise you we're going to get through this." I let go of my grip on her and I started to make my way back upstairs. "Is my momma okay?" I nodded. "She's okay, come on princess lets go for a walk..." I took her hand in my hand and we walked out of the house.

Becky
I walked up the stairs shakily and into Seth's living room and memories flooded back into my head of when Charlotte was trying to homeschool me and I didn't have a clue. The happy memories of spending all day in here with her on a Saturday trying to catch up on history before I went back to school, our pizza night together. God I'm going to miss making those memories with her, I miss her. I remember the first day I met Sasha and Dean, they both were so loud and confident but they made me feel like I fitted in. Dean was so kind, he didn't deserve to get his life taken from him like he did, neither did Bayley or Charlotte or Roman. I wish they were still here, I wish I could hear their voices again.

I make my way up to mine and Seth's room and I spot a plastic bag on the floor titled: "Rebeccas belongings." My knees are weak as I fall down next to it, spotting all my bloody clothes. I open the bag slightly just to retrieve my phone, the back is all bloodstained and suddenly my world feels like it's crashing down on me. Like I'm doing everything too quick, I drop the phone before running out into the bathroom. My whole body trembling as I try to regain my breath.

"I'm sorry Charlotte but I'm trying...I'm trying..."