Warning: This chapter contains some triggering events and something (not explicit) about prostitution. Please be mindful. Have a good reading!

You walked toward the spot Tinkerbell indicated you would find the Shadow. It was the dead of the night, and it was a miracle that none of the sentinels saw you leaving the camp. Even Hannah didn't wake up when you left. It was also far away from the camp, and you had to be careful to not get lost on the way back.

You tripped and nearly fell again. You groaned, thinking that going to see the Shadow was a bad idea now. But you needed to find a way to fight Pan, a way to protect you from his hands and his manipulative ways. Maybe you could overpower him? It was a foolish idea, and a dangerous one. What mattered now was your safety.

Finally you reached one of the highest hills in Neverland, and as you walked past burnt trees, you stopped. Everything was quiet, too quiet. Like... time had truly stopped in this place. And it seemed like there was no color, no life in this part of the island. You gulped as you reluctantly started to walk again.

"Shadow..." You murmured, like you were talking to attract a small cat. "Shadow...?"

You screamed and fell backwards as a black and shiny humanoid appeared from the dark of the night. It looked a bit like Pan, however it didn't really have a face. It was floating around, staring and observing you. Remembering Tink's words about bravery and not showing that you were frightened of it, you stood up, and stomped your foot down.

"I want to make a deal." You stated.

"What kind of deal?" It asked, approaching his face to yours. "You have to be more... specific. Speak your mind, little girl, for no one can hear you here... and no one will save you from my claws if you dare attack me."

"I want to... to be protected from Pan. Tinkerbell sent me."

"Do you only demand protection? Are you certain you don't desire for more...?"

You didn't know where this conversation was headed but you had to admit: you liked where it was going. Sensing your likeness for this idea, the Shadow seemed to smirk and floated around you, examining you again.

"Yes... I will make you a powerful leader."

"Aren't you submitted to Pan?"

"The little man will be nothing compared to you... I don't belong to anyone. I am as free as the wind." It spoke quickly. "However... I am bound to him. When he accepted to become the host, I believed he would serve me well, and would accomplish his duties toward me and the island... But he did nothing. He never did."

"What makes you think I am different?" You asked, in a confident way which surprised you because you were definitely terrified of the situation you were in.

"Because, little girl, I will ask for something different in return. Those conditions will assure me you will fulfill what you need for Neverland. However, when I will be bound to you, Pan will remain as powerful as he is right now. You will need some kind of magical artefacts to be stronger."

"I don't care." You assured him. "All I want is something to protect me from this pig. I will do anything!" You begged.

It stood up right in front of you, and asked for your hands to seal the deal. The Shadow firmly grabbed them, and you groaned painfully as you felt a burst of energy filling your veins and body. It chuckled darkly again as it watched you fall on the grass, hovering over you. You had felt so full of life a moment ago, but now you were exhausted.

"Don't worry little one, I just have one more thing to do with you..." It whispered as you closed your eyes.

When you woke up, the Shadow was nowhere in sight. You stood up with difficulty, feeling heavier than usual. You stumbled, still tired because of your short night, and tried to call the Shadow, but it didn't come. You frowned over that, and decided to head back to camp. You really hoped no one noticed your little disappearance... Well, you also hoped that Hannah didn't poke her nose through your business again.

"(Y/N)!" A voice called to you as you walked back to camp.

You turned and watched as Felix jumped down from a high tree, and you wondered how he didn't break his legs in the process. He looked a bit angry, and worried as he ran to you. He didn't have any of his weapons and it looked like he had gotten out of bed hurriedly. You rubbed your eyes like a tired child and the blond haired boy hugged you.

"What's with the sudden affection?" You asked with a chuckle.

"Hannah told me she saw you leaving the camp at night. I have been searching for you since then! What happened?"

"Nothing, you don't have to be concerned about me like that, you know. I am a big girl, I can take care of myself." You stated, mentioning your small axe tied up at your belt.

"You are lucky she didn't tell anyone else. I made her keep the secret."

You wanted to know how Felix did that. You started to wonder if Hannah was a good friend recently. After all, it was her fault that Willem got his face burnt, and that you were separated from Felix. You both returned to camp, and the second in command discreetly went to his tent to get his weapons and cloak before running to Pan, who was apparently absent this morning, observing the sea with the blond haired boy.

You sat down with all your friends in front of a dying fire, and Andy gave you some fruits as breakfast. You ate quietly, being too tired to talk. Unlike you, Andy and Léonard started to talk about some topics, including how Devin beat Luke and how dangerous this victory was. This appealed to your curiosity and you questioned those boys to your friends.

"You don't know them?" Léonard asked, surprised.

"I mean... Pan kept you away from some people for a reason..." Andy chimed in. "And we are a lot... Anyway, Devin has been here for a long time, he was one of the boys that was attracted by Pan's music when he was in Hamelin. He isn't very dangerous, I don't think you will have to worry about him that much."

"However, Luke... He is a different story." The French boy explained.

"How so?" You asked, intrigued.

"He is... He gets angry quickly, with so much intensity. It is scary."

"I even saw him killing animals... just for fun!" Andy whispered, fearing that boy might hear him. "You must not approach him. I can't even look at him straight in the eyes!"

You hummed and nodded with your head nonchalantly. Strangely, you didn't feel scared about that Luke. Was it because of the powers the Shadow gave you? You really hoped it was not some dirty trick that Peter Pan or Tinkerbell pulled on you. You wondered if you would see it again. It better appear before tonight, maybe you could try to summon him.

A painful scream reached your ears, and the three of you looked toward the direction where it came from. It was from Willem's tent, the young man whose face got burnt by your fault... Well, you felt guilty about what happened, but it was all Hannah's fault. If she didn't tell Pan and Felix about you speaking to him, he wouldn't be in much pain. You watched with sad eyes as some of his friends ran to his tent, as well as Timotheos. Pan was truly wicked, not even present to tend to the wounds of his lost ones.

Later, in the afternoon, you found yourself practicing archery and you understood quickly it was your weakest point. You missed all of your targets, even the easy ones. You couldn't be good at everything you thought. You groaned in despair as your arrow flew to the ground again. Someone giggled behind you and when you turned you were met with the most delusional eyes you ever saw.

You guessed that boy was Luke, and the second one Ben, with his pointy ears.

The tallest boy crossed his arms, watching you in a mocking way. You wanted to say something, but you remembered what Andy told you about him. He was dangerous, and he looked like it. He didn't even seem to hide his cruelty, when he opened his mouth, he started to throw insults at you and your incapacities. You just looked at him absently, taking in every word he was spitting. You were too tired to fight.

"(Y/N)!" A voice called.

You rolled your eyes as Hannah entered the training ground, but frowned when Luke and Ben stared at her with a dirty smirk. Maybe you were doubting your friendship with the red haired girl but it didn't mean you weren't worried about her. She didn't know how to defend herself. So, you took her hand and led her away from the two boys, into the woods.

"What is it?"

"I was scared when I saw your empty bed when I woke up! Where did you go?"

"It's none of your business." You replied, your voice sounding like it wasn't yours. "I mean..."

"I am your friend." Hannah said, taking your hands in her pale ones. "You can tell me anything."

You wanted to scream at her. She was the one responsible for what happened to Willem and for Felix being treated like shit by Pan. When you thought about it, she and the leader of the lost boys could be a good couple...

"I don't think so." You finally spat, walking away.

You decided to spend some time out of the camp, and so away from your problems and headaches. You didn't know what game Hannah was playing, but you didn't like it. Why was she so obsessed with being your friend? Her behaviour was not friendly, but pretty manipulative. Maybe you could talk about it to the fairy, Tinkerbell? She was so warm and full of advice. You started to like her, she looked like she carried about you, and the island.

You shrieked as big hands shoved you against a tree harshly, making you a bit dizzy as your head hit the tree. You groaned in pain as someone put something in your mouth and your hands were quickly tied behind your back. You looked up to your captors, and you realised with fear that it was the same man who took you away from your home, some months ago. Why was he here? You thought he was dead, like his crew back on the ship. The boys even made the boat sink.

"Hi sweetheart. Long time no see." He mockingly greeted you with a dirty smile. "Get her to the boat now! I don't like this place."

You trashed and thrashed against the men but it was hopeless. They were much stronger than you. You cursed at yourself, all the boys went hunting with Pan and the brown haired demon told you to stay so you would be in safety. No guards, no one, except you and your knives.

You groaned as you were pushed into the captain's cabin. Soon, a chain circled around your ankle, just like in the beginning. You fought against crying and begging, as you watched the pirate captain approaching you, a glass in his hands.

"It took me a while to gain a new crew and a new boat. But I was able to track you down, Lady."

You gasped at the mention of your nickname. Only the boys and Hook's pirates called you that. How could he know?

"You were dead." You murmured unbelievably.

"Not quite. Heavily injured. But while I was trying to swim away, a mermaid helped me. Poor her, if she knew what was coming for her... I sell her to a famous freak show." He smirked. "That's how I got enough money to buy a boat. My new recruits are just men I met and know of my legend. They all said yes when I offered places for a new adventure."

"What do you want with me!" You cried. "Why did you come back here?!"

He laughed and drank his glass quickly. You started to breathe heavily as he approached you. You backed up to the wall, remembering the threats and the fears you had with him. He crouched down and put his hand on your throat, squeezing it a bit.

"Because you are worth a lot of money, pretty girl. Men of all ranks will come to see you, at the market. They all want a pretty whore to take care of them and a virgin is also worth a bonus."

You kept your mouth shut, too scared to speak up now. All your confidence was thrown out by the window. You really thought your nightmare had ended back when Felix and the lost boys attacked his original boat, some time ago. You wanted him to go away, but at the same time... You only wanted to watch him suffer for his actions.

"I can see it now: selling now, the Lady of Neverland. You are worth billions of girls, you should be proud of that. Maybe a king or a lord will buy you... or a brothel's owner..."

"How do you know about my nickname?" You murmured.

"Hook told me. He is pretty talkative once drunk."

He wouldn't stop staring at your lips, which made you uneasy and uncomfortable. He offered you a smirk before kissing your forehead, almost tenderly. Now tears ran down your cheeks, and you stared in horror as he chuckled and almost danced around.

"You should be a happy girl! Thanks to you, I will become as rich as a king!"

"And what makes you think that?" You asked with a shaky voice. "What makes you think that you will become rich once you sell me?"

"With your pretty face, you still have that young and angelic look. All men love that. And my clients- they know all the girls I take, they're good and fresh. They trust me with my merchandise."

Your curiosity was too big now, you whipped your face and put on a confident one. You didn’t realise how much you were shaking and wondered if the captain noticed it.

"How many girls did you take? How many innocent girls did you sell to those pigs?"

The captain stopped talking and didn't say anything for a few minutes. It almost scared you. He sighed, poured himself more wine in his empty glass.

"Over a hundred." He said. "At first it was by necessity... then I took pleasure in it... Money does make you happy. My crew is happy too. Sometimes they get to play with pretty girls..."

"You're a pig just like them! I hate you! The lost boys will come find me and they will kill every single one of you!" You growled.

"Oh they won't, Lady. My crew is bigger, our weapons are more powerful."

"We have magic." You paused before hardening yourself and glared at the man with all your strength. "I have magic. I am protected. I shouldn't be the one afraid. You should be."

As soon as the words fell from your mouth, you felt the Shadow's breath on your neck. You weren't sure if the captain could see the shady being but you could hear and see him.

"You are right. He should be scared of you. He should be punished for what he did to you and the other children." It mouthed, feeding from your own hatred and anger.

You don't know how you found yourself on top of the pirate. Himself looked frightened and confused, because in your hands was his own knife. You were breathing heavily, on one hand you believed that killing the man wouldn't solve any of your problems, because you couldn't fight a bunch of pirates... but on the other hand, you wanted him to pay. After a few minutes of silence, the bastard grinned and laughed.

"You may have whatever magic tricks, little girl, but you won't have the guts to kill me. So, be a good girl and I promise you nothing will happen to you when we go back to the realm where I have to sell you."

You saw red after hearing his offer and your grip on the small but sharp knife tightened. So he wanted you to act nice? He didn't take you seriously? He didn't believe you would hurt him?

"Just like the boys there... they don't think you are capable of doing it. " The voice of the Shadow echoed in your mind. "Show them. Show Pan how tough you are. Show Felix how you can protect yourself. Show your family how you will avenge them..."

With a scream to mostly give you courage, you stabbed the man right in the chest, blood pouring for the wound. The captain tried to yell, probably to have his crew come help him but this time you went for the mouth. His eyes rolled back because of the pain, and you laughed at his misery, feeling the warm blood on your face and body. You continued to stab his limp body.

You breathed heavily once you stopped, realising what you have done. The man... Well, he was deceased and you didn't think he would rise from the dead. You slowly crawled back at the wall, and realised you had just murdered a man.

"You didn't murder him." The Shadow appeared in front of you. "You did justice. You were the victim, the judge and the executioner."

"But..."

You were at loss for words. You once were such a sweet and innocent girl, you never thought you would be the one killing someone. Your hands started to shake violently and tears ran down like a waterfall, but no sound left your mouth. You... couldn't believe what you have done. That man did deserve to be punished, but not by you. The Shadow seemed to sense your distress, and stared at you with its hollow bright eyes.

"Let me do the rest..." It mumbled as it dangerously approached your face.

You didn't have the time to say something back and you felt like falling asleep. When you woke up or rather opened your eyes, you were sitting against a tree near a lake. You groaned, feeling a little dizzy. You wondered what the Shadow had done. Looking down on your hand, you realised they were more bloody than when you had finished killing the awful captain. When you wondered what you would do with your clothes, the Shadow appeared with a change of clothes in its hands and it threw them at you. You caught them easily and stared at them: it was the same outfit you were currently wearing. It looked at you then flew aways, not saying a word. You sighed and dressed yourself, hiding the clothes in some holes beneath a tree.

"Hey!" A deep voice called from behind you.

You jumped out of surprise and tried to collect yourself. The boys didn't need to know, especially Pan and Felix. If he had learnt about the deal you had passed with the Shadow, you were sure he would not understand and would try to make you break it. You didn't like that the terms were vague, but you loved the sensation of power it gave you.

You recognised the boy as Max, the one who was always angry. You recalled he spent most of his time now with Willem, who was still suffering from his cruel punishment. He was breathing heavily when he reached you, and glared at your confused face.

"The others sent me to find you. You were absent for some hours. Pan got scared something had happened to you." He spat, rolling his eyes. "I think it is dumb honestly..." He mumbled, and you faked not hearing that part.

"Yeah, I needed some time on my own."

"Let's go back. You made me run all over the island."

When you entered the camp, you couldn't help but look for Felix. You didn't like he was hanging out with Hannah, especially that he seemed to enjoy her company... Felix was yours, not hers. You absently walked to your tent, but were stopped by Pan. He was grinning, his eyes twinkling a little bit. You blankly stared at him, waiting for him to speak.

"I was worried about you. Thought that the captain that captured you took you again... But fear not my dear lady... I killed him.''

You bite the inside of your cheeks to restrain you for telling him he didn't. You did and you remembered it clearly... The ways it made you feel, it was kind of incredible. But they didn't need to know that. You liked your act as the innocent clueless girl. It was funny, and you had Pan wrapped around your finger a little.

"Thank you Peter." You smiled, hugging him shortly. "I feel safer now."

He hugged you back with a chuckle, and you felt him smirk. Maybe he wasn't that bad after all? He was sharp around the angles, but he fiercely believed in his rules. You still had to be careful, he didn't need to know about the deal. He released you after a few minutes, kissed your hand and walked away, toward the boys who were training.

"What was that?" A voice commented from behind you.

You looked over your shoulder, recognizing Felix's voice immediately. He stepped toward you, seeming angry. You rolled your eyes at him and looked over the camp.

"I was thanking him for killing the pirate that you freed me from." You lied.

"I don't think you are telling me the truth."

"How so?"

"Hannah saw and heard pirates going after you. She came back to warn me and Pan." He murmured, so no one would hear it but you. "But Pan was not present. He could not have known that you were captured or that man was present on the island. I doubt he had killed him... On the other hand, you..."

"Don't be silly Felix." You cut him with a nervous smile. "I am just a defenseless girl."

"I don't think you are." He declared, looking straight into your eyes. "Please, stop lying to me."

"Fine... " You groaned. "I killed the pirate." You said with a low voice. "And you know what? I loved it. He deserved to suffer for what he had done to me and to my family. I would gladly kill him again if I have the chance." You replied darkly.

He stayed silent for a moment, his eyes judging you. You weren't that innocent and sweet girl anymore and you thought Felix was slowly releasing that. You could take care of yourself now. You didn't need his protection. You huffed, annoyed and frustrated with your own thoughts and decided to train with one of your friends.

You had ignored Felix for some days, preferring hanging out with your small friend's group or the Shadow. The latter was insisting quite a bit about learning how to handle yourself and to discover what you could do now, but you were more worried about the wellbeing of the others. What if you had one of those blackouts again and killed someone accidentally? You didn't know how to control that, or the Shadow by the way. He was the one to blame for all that mess.

After speaking to Tinkerbell about what happened, she decided to teach you some calming routines so once you would feel one of the blackouts coming, you could calm yourself and walk away from the fight. She told you it didn't make you a coward to care about others and what you could unfortunately do in a fit of rage. You had accepted to learn, despite the Shadow telling you not to. You weren't his puppet, unlike Pan. You wondered if he sensed something different on the island since you made the deal.

When you came back to camp, you were surprised to see some people standing up and training already. You walked up to Felix when you caught sight of him but immediately grimaced when you saw Hannah sitting besides him. You decided to stay hidden being a large tree, but could still hear their conversations and observe them. Felix looked incredibly exhausted, with dark bags under his beautiful eyes.

"Are you okay?" Hannah faked a worried voice.

"It's nothing..."

"You know you can tell me anything. We are friends after all!"

He sighed, a little defeated. You could feel the Shadow's presence around you but prefered to ignore it, too interested in the morning conversation of those two.

"I had... a nightmare but you have to swear to me you won't talk to anyone about this."

She nodded, sealing the deal and you cursed under your breath. She was such a hypocritical bitch.

"I saw... (Y/N). She wasn't the same, much darker and vicious... She destroyed the island and was killing Pan." He spoke in a low voice, staring at the little bonfire. "It was atrocious and everything was bloody. I think she even caged the boys."

The red haired girl gasped, her eyes wide with fear... Wasn't she faking it? You didn't know if the Shadow's voice in your mind was altering your judgement on her. The blond haired boy glanced at Hannah.

"I was going to fight her, I had my weapon, but I tried to speak to her, to stop her, to remind her she wasn't like that: she wasn't even listening to me. She was ready to slay me." He added sadly. "I suspect she has done something terrible, Pan seems on edge since he last talked to the Shadow. I believe..."

"You think she is with the Shadow now?" Hannah realised, taking his hands in hers. "Don't worry, it's probably a nasty nightmare. Don't think too much about it." She smiled, and she seemed like she was ready to kiss him.

You stepped in, making sure your presence was noted. The red haired girl immediately detached herself from the boy and avoided looking at you. Felix, however, was staring at you in worry. You could sense how sad and upset he was over you: he shouldn't be. You had everything under control and you had some plans going on.

You didn't understand why you were jealous of Hannah. Yes, she did get to spend more time with Felix, but he had made it clear many times he didn't care about her. You were just being delusional. You needed to focus on your plan, even if you weren't sure about it. The Shadow had taken over your body, and you didn't know how. You needed to control it, or it will control you. You will not let it win.

As you felt a presence behind you, you drew one of your tomahawk at the person and threw it at them. Felix dodged it at the last moment, and you winced when you realised the weapon had made a minor injury on his other cheek.

"What the..?!" Felix roared, angry and glaring at you. "What is wrong with you?!"

"I am sorry!" You apologised, but then your eyes hardened. "You shouldn't have sneaked up on me like that! You scared me."

Felix groaned and put a hand on his cheek then looked at it. He frowned at the sight of the blood and you really felt bad about hurting him. As you moved toward him, he took a few steps back. You felt offended by this: he didn't seem to give you his full trust, now you had more powers.

"Tell me what is wrong." He implored but still kept his distance. "You have been different since... for a long time. You have changed."

"I told you, I am not a defenseless little girl anymore."

"There is more that you are hiding from me. I can sense it. I want to help you."

You couldn't possibly tell Felix you had made a pact with the Shadow to overthrow Peter Pan. You just couldn't... Or maybe you could? He loved you right? And Pan treated him like an animal, she hated seeing that. He was a monster, turning innocent children into dangerous and bloodthirsty soldiers.

"I can't." You decided, already regretting your decision. "I... It is hard to explain. But you have to trust me!" You took his hand in yours. "I swear I am doing everything I can to protect you!"

"I don't need to be coddled!"

"You are so annoying." You hissed, shoving him away and rolling your eyes. "Let me do what I want to and you will understand. All I ask is for you to trust me."

"Well I don't like you keeping secrets from me." He snapped.

"If you are not happy with me anymore, then why don't you go fuck Hannah then?" You finally blurted out, leaving the second in command a bit stunted by the reply.

"Well, maybe it is not a bad idea!" He screamed, not even looking at you, before leaving.

You stomped your foot down like a child while you were watching him walk away quickly, extremely frustrated with the thick headed lost boy, and mad at him, at Hannah... Even at yourself for that matter. Then, worry started to spread in your mind. Would Felix actually do it? Would he dare? He was not like that...

Being that anxious made you want to tear your hair off your head. You should not have made that deal with the Shadow, everything was becoming so unclear, your judgement was being altered by its unending and perpetual whispers in your ears... You were never alone, it was always there. You could even imagine it standing there, with a satisfied smile on his hollow and dark face. Didn't you have suffered enough? You didn't need to be punished.

"It is not fair..." You whispered, some tears from your resentment rolling down your cheeks. "It is not fair!" You repeated to no one, aggressively and enraged.

Maybe you needed to step up the game a little bit. Pan and Hannah made you feel like you were a fool and a puppet, which you were not anymore. Soon, they will reap what they sow.