A/N: so I've been thinking about the final version of this story, for publication, and I'm thinking I might change it to third person (still with changing perspectives/povs). What do people think of that?

Nikolai

I'm really happy when Landon asks if I want to do some more training with him. It's been less than a week but I've thought about that night a lot. I never thought I'd find myself in this position, training to be a submissive, letting men use my body for pleasure; for so many reasons. I don't even know why I didn't hesitate when Master François suggested; or, I do, I was led by an overwhelming frisson, but it was an alien desire, and, even since my training began, it has felt strange, this need to genuflect to another.

Master François is strict, and, although he is caring as well, it is an abstract kind of care. It leaves me feeling safe, and I trust him, but it does nothing for my heart or even my head. I adhere to his rules because it is necessary, but not because I have an innate desire to do so. I have stayed, and continued to behave, because it is what I need to do at this time. I'm at my goal, I merely have to cross the finish line.

But after that night with Landon, I feel differently. When I knelt by him in waiting, I was expecting the usual boredom; focusing on holding my shoulders correctly, keeping my knees spread, wrists crossed behind my back. But when he spoke to me his eyes held something. A pleasure at me subjugating myself before him. Perhaps Master François and the other Dominants he's had me practicing my positions for had a similar pleasure at my obedience, but it was different in Landon's eyes. I don't want to say it was as if he could see me, and not just a submissive, because that would be ridiculous. So I have just allowed the fact that there was something that I found pleasant.

I can't qualify how I felt when he took me into his playroom and tormented me for hours. It's not something I've ever experienced. Master François has toyed with me many times during his training, allowed me to experience facets of the sex acts that are common in the lifestyle; bringing me, or allowing me to bring myself, to orgasm many times; used toys and his fingers to penetrate me, had me use my mouth on his penis. So the torment that Landon put me through might have been no different to that, except, somehow, it was. The merest of each of his touches seemed to send me into the stratosphere, bringing pleasure I didn't know was possible. And when he penetrated me, filling me so completely, I thought I was about to cry at the overwhelming sense of completion it gave me. I feel some slight shame that I didn't tell him he was the first, suspecting that my inexperience would show in my lack of knowledge about what to do with my body, and perhaps that's why I like the bindings so much.

"Has Master François told you how much longer until he certifies you, Nikki?" I like his easy use of my nickname, it sounds nice falling from his mouth.

"He suggested two more weeks, Sir," I tell him. "He wants Dae and I to perform publicly as part of the ceremony."

"He does?" I can't define that lilt in Landon's voice; perhaps he's annoyed. Master François did admit it wasn't that usual, but he thought we'd work well together and that he could put a show together that took advantage of my strength and Dae's slight frame.

"He did say he would need to have us work with a Dominant for it. So we could practice. Actually, Sir-" I'm not sure I can ask this, if it reveal something that will make him uncomfortable.

"May I do the show with you, Nikki?" My heart sings at him pre-empting my need and I can't help the huge smile.

"Would you, Sir? I would appreciate that a great deal."

"Dae is working with Master Chase, isn't he? Perhaps he'll help too. But, now, let's just keep getting to know each other's bodies."

I am more than happy to do that, and drop to my knees on his instruction, releasing him from his jeans. We're in his playroom, and he had me strip as soon as I came in, but he's dressed more casually than I've ever seen him, and looks incredibly sexy, with the denim hugging his muscular thighs and emphasizing his incredible butt. He lets me suck him freely, never grabbing my head to force me down on him, which I really appreciate. It's not that I didn't enjoy Master François using my throat and forcing me to gag – in fact I liked it a lot – but I was concerned it wasn't really teaching me anything because I never had chance. In contrast, Landon lets me slide him to the back of my mouth until I take a breath and adjust my positioning so he can enter my throat, where I can massage him by swallowing. It also gives me an opportunity to grope my fingers on that backside of his, not that they can penetrate the solid muscle.

He lets me work him until he releases in my mouth and I lick him clean, actually liking the taste of him in a way I haven't felt before. I swallow, yes, as a sub because it's expected and before, well, because it was expected then, too, I suppose. But I find myself hoping that I will get the opportunity to taste Landon again just because I like it.

"You're very good at that, Nikki," he tells me.

"Thank you, Sir."

"Have you ever been taken fully that way?" he asks, and I don't quite understand what he means – my English is very good, but apparently not quite good enough – so I ask him. He smiles, apparently unembarrassed, even if I don't have quite the same reaction. "Have you been face-fucked?"

"Yes, Sir. Master François has done that. I quite like it, but I enjoyed the opportunity to show you my own skill, Sir." I am red-faced, but trying to act like this is a normal conversation for me.

"He has?" Landon sounds shocked. "I didn't realize his personal training was still going that far." But he seems to be speaking to himself more than me, so I stay quiet, in waiting, listening for his next instruction.

He decides he wants me to demonstrate my skills in that too. I'm pleased that he seemed to like my first oral enough to want to try it this way too, but I'm a bit worried about lockjaw if he does it to orgasm again! Luckily for me, though, he's just testing me out, and he instructs me to place my hands behind my back so he can slide in my mouth. He's more gentle than Master François, who has always gone straight to using my throat, and Ellis did tell me he's rough more often than he isn't, but Ellis likes it that way, so I suppose it's why they work well together, even if I have been a bit worried about how often Ellis gets punished. During training, Master François said that some subs – he called them 'brats' – like to push their Master to get punishments on purpose, so maybe that's what Ellis does, though he's never told me he's a brat, and he doesn't seem like one, though of course Master François is a far better judge of that than me.

I'm getting distracted, which is one of the downsides to this face-fucking action. Because I don't actually have to be involved, I do zone out. I try to resolve that by carefully covering my teeth and sucking as Landon slides into me. I'm rewarded with a deep groan from him and he starts moving faster, finally sliding into my throat. Master François seems to like it when I gag and choke, but Landon is more considerate, and it only takes a few of his carefully pulsing strokes before I have the rhythm of breathing right, and I know I could actually keep doing this for a long time, which makes me feel good. I think I learned something new.

"You are incredible at that, Nikki," Landon gasps, pulling me up and kissing me. I like his kisses; they're warm and safe but still very passionate and it gives me a little shudder of anticipation about what he might want to do to me today. He surprises me by asking what I want.

"I don't know, Sir. I know there is a lot to do, though Master François has shown me a lot of the toys and equipment. But he hasn't used it all. But," and I'm a little shy at this, "I really enjoyed being tied, Sir. Perhaps something like that?" He grins at me, his brown eyes laughing.

"Well, I enjoyed tying you, so I think we can definitely look to something in that realm, sweet thing."

He guides me over to the side of the room that has the grid on the ceiling and has me stand to attention while he gets things out of drawers. I hear clinking but daren't turn, as I need to keep my eyes on the ground, and I don't want what I'm sure is going to be very enjoyable to turn into a punishment. He fastens thick padded cuffs to my wrists so they are connected at the small of my back and then I feel matching cuffs at my ankles and quickly realize he's fastened me to a spreader bar. I feel a little uneven when he extends the width of my legs, without my arms to steady me, but he's soon standing behind me, holding me steady.

"I may push you a little further with today's position, Nikki. Let me hear your safe words," he reminds me.

"Red to stop, yellow to slow down, Sir," I reply promptly.

"Good. Use them at any point this gets too much," he insists as I feel him connecting something, the clinking thing, to my wrist cuffs.

I feel my arms inexorably being pulled upward behind me, forcing me to bend, and can instantly feel the strain in my upper arms at the unexpected stretch, even while I know there's still a lot further Landon could push me if he wanted too, but I appreciate that he's taking it slow.

"You look so beautiful, Nikki," Landon whispers, stroking along my back. "I will be in the room the entire time, of course; always able to reach out to you, but if you find yourself unsteady you must safeword, as I don't want you to be hurt by falling.

"Yes, Sir," I agree as he begins to gently manipulate the flesh of my backside, massaging the muscles pleasurably.

I feel good here, despite the slight discomfort in the stretch of my arms and the bend at my hips, and I think it's because I feel helpless but safe. I've gotten used to enjoying the feeling of vulnerability, but until now it's come with a sensation of fear too, that somehow I'm giving up too much of myself and what I'm getting back isn't quite worthwhile. I understand it as something more than simply getting a nice orgasm, because if that's what the trade-off was then I'd be winning all the way, but I think the way I'm experiencing it with Landon is giving an extra sensation that does make it worthwhile, and maybe is the reason so many of the subs do what they do.

I won't get too attached to it though. I know he's only playing, and, officially, that's all I'm doing too. I don't have knowledge in this, and I've never really been one of those to leap at new experiences. The decision I made to come to America, after what I discovered, was the most crazy, impetuous thing I've ever done; but these involvements I've had since are definitely up there. Maybe it's some impact of the Land of the Free.

He's massaging lube inside me, using his long fingers to stretch my walls, making me moan and push back against him, which earns me a slap on the bum, but I don't stop; it just feels too good.

"You looking for a spanking, Nikki?" Landon asks me, and his voice is so gruff and sexy; just that makes me moan even louder.

"Yes, please, Sir," I huff, still illegally thrusting my hips back against his thick fingers. He chuckles at my words, and I remember too late that we're meant to pretend I don't want a spanking and it would be a punishment for being greedy, but I like the fact that he doesn't seem to care, just withdraws his fingers, which has me moaning in annoyance this time, and holds me steady while he lands firm slaps against me. I can't even define why I like getting spanked so much, it makes no sense to me.

I used to get spanked as a child, only because it's usual where I grew up – there's no abuse in my past and I don't feel especially hard done to, or in any way turned on by it – but I had never been spanked as an adult until Master François did it on that defining day. Feeling Landon do it is even different to that though, and I suppose most of the Dominants have their own styles and preferences. If a spanking can be said to be gentle, I'd say that's how Landon does it, a sharp thwack across one cheek followed by rubbing the tingling skin. He does that over and again, alternating cheeks, increasing in power, but always rubbing the stinging skin between each one in a way that seems to spread the warmth and give a direct connection to my almost painful erection, which leaps and drips with each rub.

Regardless of the reason for this 'punishment', I'm thrusting back to meet his hand with each strike and he finally stops, resting his hand on my heat.

"Oh dear, sweet thing, you like that far too much. It certainly won't serve as a punishment." I'm a little worried he might decide to punish me further now, because I'm incredibly aroused and just want him to take me, and also because, irrespective of how much I revel in his hand, I don't much like the paddle, and Master François hasn't even used anything more painful than that on me.

Just when I come to the conclusion I'm pretty ready to take whatever Landon chooses to give me, and that I trust him not to push me too far, I feel the wet heat of his tongue probing my entrance, French kissing my excited hole. He's holding my hips, which is lucky because I think there's a good chance of me just falling over if I rely on my own balance now, as control is flying out of the window. I start to moan louder, begging incoherently for more, as I can feel a tensing sensation running up my inner thighs and out, through my stomach.

He moves then, to my disappointment, but not for long, as he positions himself so he can slide into my mouth and reaches back to continue manipulating me, relaxing my taut muscles, getting me ready for him.

My arms are getting really sore, overriding the pleasure a little, but, almost as if he can read the limits of my body, Landon moves behind me, giving some slack in the chain that's holding my arms back, allowing me a breath of relief just as he slams inside my well-prepared hole. The howl I let out it full of agonizing desire and it's all I can do to hold off my orgasm as he moves inside me, teasingly, temptingly grinding against my pleasure spot, until, finally, just when I think my thought processes might have been replaced by electric sparks, he gives me the permission I need to let go, as I feel him swell inside me too.

After he's released me from my bonds and guided me to the bed I feel relaxed and content.

"So, would you like me to speak to François about your public show?" he asks, sounding a little nervous, I think.

"I would, Sir, thank you." I don't want to sound over-eager, in case he gets put off the idea. I know from Ellis that almost all of Master François' close friends don't have contracted submissives at the moment, and I'm quite hoping that Landon will offer me a contract once I'm qualified. Not necessarily because of the lifestyle, but because I still haven't done what I came here for.

Before he got grounded at Christmas, Ellis introduced me to a few other subs too, and it seems like the usual thing is to play around with different Doms once training is finished; they call it 'trying out the different styles' but it looks a lot like an opportunity to be slutty from where I am. I don't judge that, but it isn't me. My concern is that I think I might become suspect if I don't. Master François has already been suggesting other Doms to do parts of my training, but I've been avoiding confirming anything to him so far. I don't know what he'd do if he found out I wasn't honest with him about my lack of experience, but I think a punishment would be on the cards. If he knew all the things I'm keeping quiet about I'm sure I wouldn't be able to sit down for a month – I'd be like poor Ellis, who seems to do nothing but wince at the moment.

But if I'm going to stay around to do what I need to, then I'd really like to be with Landon. He has a sensitivity about him that is belied by his powerful stature. I know from talking to the other subs some of them find him intimidating, partly because of his height and muscles, but also because of his friendship with Master François, who is universally considered terrifying and very strict. They desire him, but they're scared of him too. Even though I'm not immune to that frightening power he has, I actually feel a bit sorry for him that the subs are so in awe of him, because I can see that he really cares about their wellbeing and, if he let it, I think the distance that his stature and attitude engenders would upset him. Landon doesn't suffer it as much, because it's obvious that subs he's worked with very quickly recognize the warm man beneath the exterior as he doesn't try to hide it. I like that he doesn't seem to have something to prove.

I do have something to prove though, even if it's only to myself. So, in addition to my original challenge I have a new one, to get that gorgeous hunk of a man to see me as someone he wants to play with, for as long as I need to be around this lifestyle.

A/N: (more) clues that Nikki's reason for being in America isn't entirely innocent...