Reminders:

↝ This is unedited so please excuse the errors that you will definitely meet as you read.

↝ Lahat ng mababasa mo dito ay opinyon ko lamang patungkol sa gawa mo. They are subjective but there are also parts na objective.

↝ Make sure to do all of the payments for this. I trust you.

↝ Feel free to correct me if I have said something wrong.

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Chasing the Hero
written by azurescarlet101

Genre: Teen-Fiction
Language: Filipino-English

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i. Book Cover

Ang cute ng cover! Very aesthetic. I think it suits the lightness of your story. Nandoon yung Teen-Fiction vibes. I like the image used. It compliments the title so much and of course, it reflects the main character. I could feel the humorous attitude of the lead through the image. Overall, I am so much inlove with the cover. It's clean and very pleasing to the eyes.

ii. Story Title

Just like the cover, I think the title is also cute (lmao). Wala naman kasi akong nakikitang problema dito. It sounded light parang yung mga typical na Teen-Fiction na story. Yung tipong mga ebook days pa hahaha! Inelevate lang ng kaunti yung choice ng words. Ang delicate ng mga salitang ginamit mo. Ah basta! It is very refreshing to me. Not that unique pero hindi din naman ganoon ka cliche. Kaya naman niyang makakuha ng atensiyon lalo na at nagkakatugma sila nung book cover.

iii. Story Description

Napakalinis na description. Malaman at walang patapos na details. You gave enough information about the characters and what might be the possible conflict. Honestly, typical love story lang naman siya. Hindi siya yung tipong mapapawow ka pero hindi din naman yung mapapa-nah ka. It still can attract readers lalo na at napakarefreshing niyang basahin. It's like a breakthrough from the harsh reality (wow). I like the description!

iv. Prologue

So flashback yung pinili mong ilagay sa prologue and sa tingin ko tama lang yung naging desisyon mo. Atleast naibigay mo yung back story nung mga bida at hindi magiging mahirap yung pagsusulat ng mga next chapters. Also, sasabihin ko ulit na ang cute hahaha! I really find the whole story cute (Myghad!) May mga kauting errors lang when it comes sa dialogue tag at sa spacing pero other than that, it's a great start.

v. Characterization

Ang cute nila! Medyo nagiging walang kwenta na 'tong critique na'to. Sorry pero cute talaga sila. Very light and fun. Punong-puno ng humor ang bidang babae. I love her personality so much! Bagay na bagay sa attitude nung lalaki. Consistent din silang lahat and realistic! Sure ako na maraming makakarelate sa kanila lalo na at students lang din sila. Basta ang saya lang hahaha! Magaling ang pagkakagawa mo sa mga characters knowing na lalaki ka (tama diba?). You pulled the female lead amazingly! I can't imagine na lalaki ang nasa likod ng personality na 'yon.

vi. Writing Style

→ Dialogues and Narration
As what I have said, may mga iilang errors when it comes sa dialogue tags. Be careful tayo dito. Mukhang alam mo naman yung mga rules dito at nalilito lang. Also, nakakalimutan yung paggamit ng space. Make sure na after every punctuation, may space muna. May mga dialogues kasi na dikit-dikit.

When it comes sa narration, very good ka dito. Napakagaan ng pagkakanarrate mo ng mga scenes. Very fun and refreshing. Maayos ang transition at hindi nakakabored basahin.

→ Language
I've found typographical errors. I suggest na basahin muna, kahit isang pasada lang, yung buong chapter bago ipublish para nababawasan yung mga 'to. Wala naman akong nakitang problema na seryoso at paulit-ulit. Unintentional lang namang yung mga pagkakamali na 'yon at pwede pang ayusin.

→ Grammar
Same goes sa language, may mga mali din akong nakita pero hindi naman sila seryoso. Reread lang before publishing dahil may mga iba na nakakasira na sa daloy ng kwento.

♡ ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ ♡

Hello, Jin! I hope may naitulong ako with this critic. One word to describe your work, it's very cute! Lol! Sobrang syang basahin nito. Ipagpatuloy mo lang ang pagsusulat nito. Godbless and stay healthy!