"Let me in.", she insisted, head lowered and a dark shadow on her face.

"No.", you pulled the door shut to make sure it was locked and positioned yourself right in front of it. "I won't let you into my house, to my children while you're high off your ass, Kimmy!"

Resentment tied your throat, made your heart race. The sheer presence of hers was enough to make you want to lash out.

Every fucking year she did this shit. And every fucking year it was the same mess all over again.

"I'm clean!", for the first time she raised her head to meet your gaze.

A snort escaped you. Her pupils were the size of dinner plates. Not literally but also obviously not untouched by the effects of whatever substances she had taken.

That also explained the sweat shimmering on her forehead. And the shaky legs. She was in a state of withdrawal, high enough to do somewhat okay but not high enough to knock her out.

With your teeth clenched, you leaned back and tried to swallow the rage that grew in the pit of your stomach. You couldn't help but hate her for everything.

"Leave my property.", you hissed, your voice shaking. "I swear to go, Kimmy, I will not be doing the same shit again."

With a snort, she rolled her eyes.

"You're calling me a liar?!", her voice was so unhinged that it echoed through the entire street.

Your eyes shot up, darted through the darkness. An audience would only make this worse. But you would rather slice your wrists than let her in for the sake of privacy.

She'd take any small offering of good will you'd give her only to leech off of it for the devil knew how long.

"The last time you said you're sober I found you passed hanging over Elliot's crib. While he was screaming his head off, unfed and dirty. For hours!"

She rolled her eyes.

"That happened one time.", she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "It never happened again."

A hoarse laughter slipped through your teeth.

"Yeah cause you weren't allowed to visit anymore."

"You're stripping me off my right to see my babies!"

"But they are not, Kimmy! They are not your babies, they are MY sons! If you really loved them you would have taken just one of the bloody thousands of chances I gave you.", desperate for her to finally understand you grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her, gasping for air. "Fuck, Kimmy, you relapsed so many times. I gave you so many chances! But you just keep being fucking selfish."

"This is my life, (Y/N)!", she yelled back, tears in her eyes. "What the fuck do you care if I ruin it?!"

At a loss for words you gasped for air, curled your hands into fists only to let out a scream of frustration. You didn't know what to do, paced up and down along the door.

"Because you're not just ruining your own life. For fucks sake!", you cried out loud, your fingers entangled in your hair to keep yourself from loosing your mind. "You're ruining Elliot's life! You're ruining Matthias' life! Fuck, if I think about it I'd trust you to be responsible for their deaths at some point!"

Irritated, she backed away. Her lips trembled. Instead of tears of pain there was now raw anger visible in the brown of her eyes.

She clenched her teeth. And all of a sudden she lashed out at you. Her flat hand hit you right in the face, a burning pain exploded in your cheek.

Sucking in a sharp breath you threw your head to the side, one hand pressed to the pain to numb it. Your (S/C) skin was throbbing. It felt like a bundle of warmth started to grow like a tumour.

"How can you say something so cruel?!", her voice trembled with every word she screamed straight at your face. "I would never do something like this!"

Guilt tied your throat and for a brief second you wished you could take back the words. Then again, at the same time there was this whisper in the back of your head.

You had every right to tell her what you thought of her. All these chances, all the options she's had. Everything you had sacrificed just for her to have another shot at life.

And every time she had spit you in the face.

With your eyebrows knitted together, you turned to look her in the eyes. Anger and resentment mixed into a pool of pure disgust.

Your breath hitched in your throat.

"Thing is, Kimmy...", you took a deep breath, your voice calm yet like knives of ice. "I don't fucking believe you. And neither does the goddamn family court. Everyone is on my side and you keep coming back, acting like an entitled cunt! You've had your chances. And I'm done fucking catering to your awful life decisions!"

"You took everything from me! My sons! My life!", she gestured towards the house. "This could all be mine! We could be in this together!"

"But we can't.", numbness filled your chest, made your head feel empty. "Because all of this is because I got MY SHIT together. For the boys. Something that YOU flat out refused."

"It's just not that easy for me as it is for you!"

"Bullshit! I made life as easy as one could have it for you! Where was my help, Kimmy?! Where were you when I struggled to make rent and feed Elliot? Where were you when Matthias was rushed to the hospital because your junkie ass was responsible for his lungs collapsed at six weeks?!"

Sucking in a sharp breath, Kimmy pressed her lips into a thin line. Her chin rose in a cocky manner.

Your shoulders tensed. You fully expected her to strike again. But this time she'd try and cause a wound. You were ready.

But all of a sudden the door opened behind you.

"What the fuck.", Kyle snarled over your shoulder.