.

.**.

.

"Urghhh... my fucking head.... What the hell happened, brat? Brat...? What in the –"

This wasn't the sewers of the brat's seal. No sewage covering the floor. No bars. And there was a ceiling. An extremely high ceiling with fading calligraphy and symbols painted in the squares.

"Nonononono!!! Not another prison!!!"

'Please. Please. Please. Don't be....'

"Brat!!!!!"

There was nothing in my memories between being ripped from the last prison and being dumped into this one.

Nothing.

"These aren't –"

No fur. No claws.

Not mine.

Too small. Too delicate.

Not the brat's either.

Nor did he have stupidly long red hair.

"Where - where the fuck are my tails!?!"

All nine of them!

Gone!

"Aw shit."

They couldn't have just fucking imprisoned me. Again. They had to turn me into a fucking flesh bag. And judging by the new chest shape, a stupid female one at that.

"I fucking hate humans."

'And now I'm stuck as one.... Fuck it. Let's see what kind of prison I'm in.'

"How the hell do humans do this?"

Walking.

Couldn't stand without wobbling. Listing to the left, then to the right. My toes tiring in the struggle to stay upright. Taking another step wasn't even in the fucking realm of reality.

Couldn't even leave me with one measly tail for balance. But nooo, had to take all of them. The fucking humans.

"Crawling it is."

'Humans have arms. Why the fuck do they not use them?'

...Because they're absolutely shit for crawling. Snails move faster than this slow ass speed.

Evolution sure fucked them over.

Took forever to cross the overgrowth of moss and vines. The wall so, so far away.

A puny human body in a prison that would have fit me far more comfortably than the brat's sewers. Even had fresh air blowing through from the open front. The carved wooden pillars were all more than far enough apart for any bijū to fit through.

'What kind of fucking prison doesn't involve bars, chains or stakes?'

There's nothing impeding my movements here. Nothing separating me from the trees beyond. Except for this puny human body that couldn't move like how I wanted.

Wasn't my body.

Standing was far simpler with the wall as support. Walking was somewhat manageable. One foot in front of the other.

And maybe falling over a time or fucking two.

Fell right into a nook hidden behind the overgrowth.

"Flesh bags suck."

They hurt so easily. My shoulder throbbed in pain. A simple fall shouldn't even register to me.

But it did.

In this body. It did.

"What in the... Jiji...?"

A statue of him standing in the little nook. With his little horns, two purple eyes and one red eye. His white robes were brown with age and time. Little vines holding the cracked piece of him together.

'Why the hell does this prison have a statue of the old man?'

Scrambling out of the nook, I yanked on the vines and moss on the walls.

"...No way...."

My knees gave out. Landing on my butt hurt.

I couldn't believe my eyes. Paintings of the nine of us around the little nook. Shukaku and... and Matatabi still had their baby fat in the lines. The paintings of Asura on the left and Indra on the right. A pair of white circles above it all, drawn in another circle. Byakugan on the moon. The whole family. Here.

"...I'm ho-home?"

All of it blurring away with water leaking out of my eyes.

'Why...? How did I get here?'

A forgotten temple built so long ago.

'And why am I human...?'

Why was I not lost in the Jūbi...?

I couldn't sense in here. Not with all the barriers the old man put up. A place where I could rest in peace. Without being bombarded by the horrors of humanity. What they do to each other and what they do to everything else.

Maybe a few falls later, I stumbled my way to the temple entrance. No more walls to support me. Had to stand on my own.

Cautiously placing my foot onto the engawa, I succeeded. Nothing stopped me. No barrier. No pain. No false sense of freedom. Walked right out onto the cool grass of the night.... Or I may have fallen onto it.

Little flickers of life pinged off my senses. So many souls. They weren't hollowed out like they were before the brat was caught, twisted into weapons. These were bright. So, so bright.

None of it made sense.

We were down to a handful of survivors. A fucking handful.

"Can't say I miss the damn hatred humans are so fond of," I muttered, scratching at my neck. The blunted nails of this human body doing absolutely nothing for the sensation of insects crawling about under my skin.

Pulling in my senses until the itch stopped, I stared up at the moon. The moon.

How the hell was the moon in the sky? Was the old bitch not running free?

'What the hell's happening?'

"I...I need to find the brat."

But... this was home. My home. One built for me. Built by the old man and I hadn't...

"Sorry, Jiji. I haven't been a good son, have I?"

No words answered me.

Just a breeze in the night air.

"Peace, huh?"

Was peace even possible?

'Maybe with the brat.'

He was the one who knocked me out of that twisted state of mind.

Turning away from... my home, I headed through the large trees. Asura's chakra still thrumming through the bark and leaves.

A flat surface was difficult as it was. A pathless, root-riddled route was a sink-or-swim experience of learning to walk... some form of walking that involved dumb human face kissing the dirt far too many times.

Flesh bags were so fragile. The skin mars so easily. Bruising from falls. Scratching from the bark. Cutting from the stones. Ridiculous.

"How the hell do humans live like this?!"

Barely missed drowning myself in a lake.

Chakra channelled down to my feet, and I flew back first into a tree. Bounced right off it and even bounced on the ground before so much water rained on me.

"Ahhh! My fucking eyes! Oww...."

Apparently, that wasn't how one water walked.

The water decided to explode instead of being walked on.

Shaking out the water didn't feel any bit right as it should have. Nor was I even a little drier. Still as soaked as I was before the shaking.

Human bodies were awful.

And long hair was awful. Wet long hair weighed so damn much. And it stuck to everything.

Clung to each other. Clung to my skin. Clung to the fucking what I tried to squeeze out.

Still a cold, wet, ropey mess that picked up leaves from the ground from how stupidly long it was.

One of the bitches used hot air to dry her hair with that screaming machine.

So, with that in mind, I moulded my chakra into wind with a pinch of fire, and the stupid hair went up in flames.

Flung my head right into the water. I did not want to experience being on fire as a human. Highly doubt they were fireproof. Couldn't remember any of my dumb jailers being fireproof.

Evolution really fucked them over.

Came face to face with a gaping mouth. I backed right back out of the water and got slapped in the face by a fucking wet, slimy tail.

"What the hell are you?!"

No answer. Just a red and white fin sliding through the surface of the water. A giant fin attached to a giant ass fish. One bigger than this puny human body.

I couldn't remember the koi getting so fucking big. Not that I could remember all that much of that time. But I did remember a kid running about with a fish. If it were this big, the kid would be crushed under it. Or eaten. Probably eaten.

'Oohhh, there's more than one of those monsters. Fuck.'

A bunch of them were gathered at the shore. Swimming right over each other.

'I'm going to just...'

Walk along the shore until I get to the other side or hope some bridge appears out of nowhere. Practice walking... and to get away from that goddamn awful smell. And maybe keeping more than a few paces from the water's edge. Maybe then the koi wouldn't follow and try to eat me... hopefully.

At least the hair was no longer able to pick up leaves from the ground. Lost some of its length with that fire... but the smell of burnt hair fucking followed with.

'There should be a bridge around here somewhere.'

That was how the humans visited the temple. My home.

And then I came upon a footprint in front of me.

My footprint.

There was no bridge. There was no 'around the lake.' This was a fucking island.

The water was easy to cross as a bijū. Just a step or, at most, a hop.

The water would be easy for a ninja. Just walk right across. But the water was exploding, and there was no way in hell was I swimming with those gigantic koi.

Not even sure I could work out the mechanics of swimming before they fucking drowned me. Then again, if I could keep on atop of that frantic mass....

Nope.

Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nooope.

If I couldn't water walk and there wasn't a bridge, then....

With a shrug of the shoulders, I shoved more than a drop or two of chakra to my feet and jumped.

"Ah fuck."

Short by a bit.

One puny human body length out of reach.

And the moulding a tiny bit of chakra into wind was probably the worst idea I had.

It got me to the shore, sure.

Blew me right to it.

With a massive slice in my back.

I didn't even mould any chakra into fire, but the cut sure burned like it was. Could have something to do with the hair seeping water into it. Moving made it so much worse, pulling at the edges and slowing the healing.

'How the fuck do humans stand this? This is awful.'

And I only had to deal with this a fraction of the time they did. They healed so fucking slow. They couldn't just lay here for an hour or two, probably a lot longer than that, and pop up with just an irritated scratch on the skin.

At least a good portion of the water had evaporated by the time I was stumbling down an entire fucking mountain. I had a sinking feeling this was far easier and faster as a Bijū. A lot less slipping and sliding.

As difficult as walking was, the view from this angle was... beautiful. The trees towered over me instead of the other way around. Vines and moss hung off the branches at neck-hanging height. Moonlight trickled through the canopy, lighting ankle traps in the overgrowth. Little pings of life scattered across my senses. Most of them even and mellow, animals in the land of dreams. Some of them tamped down, predators on the hunt.

'How the hell do humans even navigate like this?'

I couldn't see where I was going. My night vision was better than most humans from what I remember of that brat's sight. But from down here, landmarks weren't visible. Just trees. Lots and lots of fucking trees.

'Please be alright, brat.'

.

.**.

.

AN: This is a half shot! This is a good spot to stop reading, and I would have only posted this much if I didn't like the other chunk of this enough to post it too. I dug this up from my graveyard of dead fics, and I have no intention of continuing it. This was the result of an afternoon of creative madness. I wish I could write like this on the regular.

I started a Discord for anybody interested. Link should below but I'm not seeing it.
https://discord.gg/p8GdXYyKSS

(I've put the link in the comment. Wattpad isn't behaving.)