I was walking away from a burning mansion, yawning as the screaming goblins within burned to death. I noticed a burning goblin rush at me, a short sword in hand.

"Yeah, no." I said as I threw an iron dagger into it's head. I watched as the corpse imploded from the enchantment. "Exploding daggers. Best idea yet." I said as I walked to the Caravan I was protecting. I sighed, as the emergency quest had given me a detour. It was on it's way to Axel, thank Talos.

"Thank you again for your help Lupus-sama." One of the travelers said. "Perhaps you would like a drink, free of charge?" She held up a small bottle and leaned onto me. "Or, maybe a warrior such as yourself needs something more... Appropriate." She said in a sultry tone as she traced a finger along my arm.

"Ah, I am good." I said, turning my head to the East. "You should get back to the caravan, we have more bandits coming this way."

I pull my arm out of the grasp of the prostitute and pulled the sheathed sword off of my back, and resting it against my waist, where my daedric sword would lay. I closed my eyes as I felt the pounding of hooves come over the hill with my new skill: {Sixth Sense}

As the horsemen got closer, I built up my second skill. 100 yards. 50. 25. Now!

"Unique skill! {Earthen Judgement}"

I felt my Magicka drain as I slammed the sheathed sword on the ground, a wave of dust flew up around me, Blocking the caravan from the bandit's view. Foolishly, they charged in, not realizing that they had falled into my trap. Shouts of panic broke the silence as the dust cleared, revealing half of the bandits pierced by stone spears. The other half backed up in panic and started to flee. I pulled out a simple long bow and fired a shot at the furthest bandit, nailing him in the head.

"{Barrier}" I muttered as the bandits body exploded and a shiny purple wall cut the escape route of the bandits. "Such a shame. I thought you would put up at least a little bit of a fight." I said as I pulled out a Elven dagger, and threw it ito the head of a bandit. But this one did not explode. Instead it glowed purple, and all of the bandits also glowed purple. Seconds later they all slumped down, dead. I pulled the dagger out of the bandit's head and touched it to a bag of soul gems. "I needed more of those." I muttered as I put the dagger and gems away. "I still have thousands of enchantments to try."

I walked back to the caravan yet again, and we started moving, heading back to Axel.

Location: Axel
Time: mid-day

I walked into the Guild, after being gone for three days. I was greeted by cheers and barrels of mead, and having a good time.

I see a blob of blue hair, and walked over to the Bar, where I see two new people.

"Well well well." I said, standing next to the Bar. "Looks like you got yourself some more party members Kazuma, Aqua."

"Ah! Lupus-sama!" Aqua said as she hugged me. "You're back! How did it go? What did you slay?"

As I tried to pull the spastic mess off me, I noticed the tankard of ale. "Is she drunk?" I ask. Kazuma and a girl dressed in red nodded. "Great." I sighed as I finally managed to pull Aqua off. "So, who are you?" I asked the new girls.

The girl in red spoke up. "I'm Megumin! Commander of the finest magic there is!"

Megumin "EXPLOSION!" Waifu

I glanced at her aura, and it showed promise. She had a kind heart, but had pride around the edges. But her magical aura was.... Interesting to say the least. It was large in quantity, like it drains everyday and builds up, as if it's pushed to its absolute limit.

"Okay..... and you?" I asked the blonde girl.

"My name is Darkness, I am trying to get in the party still."

Dustiness "Darkness" Ford Lalatina

"It is a pleasure to meet you, I am Lupus Moon." I said. I felt weary around her, like she was hiding something. My instincts were telling me to run and never look back, and her aura showed it. It was full of Lust and desire, with a tad bit of envy and pride. "Well, I see you have collected a wizard and a crusader. A fine addition! Now you can have mages from the back casting support magic, while you and Dust- Ahem- Darkness attack from close up. This looks like a fine party to be starting in for beginners." I said as I sit down at the bar. I feel a presence behind me, and I turn to see a girl with white hair, violet eyes, and a scar on her cheek.

Chris the thief???

I raised an eyebrow at the question marks at the end of the name. Her aura was similar to Aqua's, but it was more honest, less arrogant. Not much else, but she felt almost holy, which is weird for a thief, a sinner who showed no greed.

I sent a {telepathy} message to 'Chris'.

"We are talking after this. Meet me at the stables near the edge of the city."

"Who are you?"

"I should be asking you that. You don't belong here. You've most likely bent the minds of the sheep around us to place your roots, if I deem you a threat, you shall meet a champion, Thief."

"...Very well..."

"Lupus-sama?" Aqua asked. "Can you help me pay my debt? I drank too much."

I sighed. "Aqua, if you need to pay off a debt, asking me for money is not wise. Then you would be in debt to me, and I always collect my money. Do small jobs or get a job, either way, stop drinking so much."

Aqua started to tear up, then cried. "I can't take it anymore! I keep being eaten by frogs and covered in slime! I sleep in a stable with this Neet!" She rants.

As she continues to rant, I notice Dustiness start to squirm and moan as the scent of arousal becomes stronger. I start to back away, as my body reacts to the woman in heat. "Yes please let me in your Party! You can use me as a shield even if my strikes don't land!"

Woah! What in the name of me! That explains a lot! She enjoys pain. I believe it is called "masochistic". One who enjoys pain, the opposite of "sadistic" one who enjoys giving pain. No wonder she is sending my instincts haywire, it would be bad for my balance between Order and Chaos.

"..." I just stare at the group, who stares at Dustiness. "So I have something to take care of. This is your Party Kazuma, your decision. Come thief, we must talk."

As me and Chris walk out of the guild, I notice that she becomes more guarded, even reaching for the dagger she has. About mid way to the stable, she drew her dagger and lunged at my back. I promptly responded by grabbing the arm wielding the dagger and flipped her over my shoulder. Just as she was about to hit the ground she rolled, but forgot to watch where she was going and rolled into a wall.

"ow."

'Idiot."

Timeskip

Me and Chris had just gotten back form our... talk and made our way back to the guild hall. There, we found the rest of the girls, sitting at a table and talking about something.

"Go Thief. I must get a drink." I told Chris. The small girl looked at me and walked over to the table. I walked over to the bar and told the barkeep to make me a cold one. while I waited, I listened in to the conversation the girls were having.

"Darkness, I'm sorry, uh, but I haven't been totally honest with you." Kazuma said. "The thing is, me and Aqua might look harmless, but our mission here is to bring down the devil king."

"Mhm." Aqua agreed.

"Are you serious?" Megumin asked.

"I know pretty awesome huh?" Aqua asked with a satisfied smile on her face.

"Anyway, we know how rough it's gonna get for us, and we're okay with that. But what about you Darkness? If he catches a lady knight like you, do you know what he's gonna do?" Kazuma asked.

Ah shit. Here we go. Kazuma is about to make her day with what she's about to say. I grab my tankard and walk over to the table they are at.

"For starters, he'll chain you up and torture the hell out of you!"

"Yes, I fully expect he would, for you see since days of old, becoming his erotic plaything has been a female knights duty, and that alone makes it worthwhile to go!"

"Wait what?" Me and Kazuma ask at the same time.

Oh, sorry did I say something strange just now?" Darkness apologized.

"Look Megumin, I meant what I said. we're going after the devil king, the strongest being in this world." Lies. "He's no joke, so don't feel like you have to come with us."

Megumin slams her hand on the table. Ah great, the crimson demon speech "My name is Megumin, member of the crimson demon clan, wielder of explosion, Their finest spell, the devil king thinks he is superior to us, but I shall obliterate his vile presence with the strongest magic in the land!"

Kazuma and Aqua start whispering to each other. I just sip from my drink. "So, explosion magic huh, nice." I told Megumin.

"Yup, the strongest magic there is!" Megumin boasts. I just laugh.

"I have a stronger spell." I said as magic glowed in my palms. "I can bring death from the skies with my meteor magic!" I shout. Me and Megumin were building up in magic power, when an announcement was made.

"Emergency quest, emergency quest!"

"Another one? Really?" I mutter to myself.

"We need all available adventurers to assemble at the front gate! I repeat, all available adventurers assemble at the front gate at once!"

"What is it this time?" I wonder to myself as I speed to the front gate, the bell ringing behind me.

I reach the front gate before anyone else, and scan the horizon. I feel the others coming up behind me, and i ask the closest one, "What kind of monsters do you think will be attacking us?"

"Cabbage."

"Ah." I responded, then thought for a second. "Wait, what?"

"It's harvest time!" everyone shouts.

"Again, what?" I asked as I looked closer at the flood of green. Using my enhanced sight, I look at the cabbage that is flying to the city. "Huh. Beats having to go look for it." I said as I drew a simple steel sword and shield. "Let the fun begin." and a bunch of letters appear in front of me

Defeat All the Cabbages Flying into the City

"ATTACK!" I shouted, enhanced by my shout.

I hear the announcement that I have to capture them form behind me. "Very well, ten thousand per head? Easy as dragon hunting!" I shout as I shout, "LIZ SLEN NUS!" [Ice form]

Cold air burst from my mouth as a dozen are frozen solid. I open my box beneath them, and they fall right in. I keep using Ice Form to freeze them, and eventually lose count to how many I've collected. I hear cries form behind me, and I look back, to see many adventures falling victim to the cabbages.

"Hold on!" I shouted and I drew my weak bow, and firing many arrows near the knights. "{BARRIER}!" I shouted, as many of my protective walls surrounded most of the fallen adventurers, but not all of them. As I race to them, I notice Darkness rushing to them and using her body to block the adventurers, her armor falling to pieces. I shift into my dragon bone armor, and raise my shields and a new wave of cabbage comes in to strike Darkness.

1st person: Kazuma

I give up on Darkness. she is just too freaky, I was about to walk away, when I hear someone shout, "LUPUS-SAMA!" I turn to see a man clad in bone armor stand in front of Darkness, two shields raised. "Woah, is that Lupus-sama?" I asked one of the adventures.

"Aye lass, that is his ultimate defense, the dragon soul. He never wears it for long, as he says it drains his soul while he wears it. But nothing gets past him while he dons that armor." the man next to me said. "That's the adventuring king, Lupus-sama."

I think I'm in love. he is just screaming MANLINESS guarding Darkness in an armor that hurts his soul. However I doubt that last part. using dragon bone armor in Skyrim never hurt you. But this isn't the game, and he isn't the dragonborn, so it might. But it looked like he was using the dragon shouts in the beginning.

Lupus P.O.V.

As I was guarding Darkness, I felt a strong magic build up behind me. I look to see a dark aura flowing into her staff, and I could just barley hear the chanting.

"Darkness shrouded in light, frenzy blaze clad in night, in the name of the crimsion demons, let the collapse of thine origin manifest, summon before the root of thy power hidden within the lands of the kingdom of demise! EXPLOSION!"

"Ah hell." I said as I raised the shield above us. "{Dome}!" A purple dome spread out from my shield and covered everyone. I grunted as the force of the spell started to crack the shield. "Okay what the fuck? Did that pipsqueak put all her points into this one spell!?" I shouted as I reinforced the still cracking dome. the explosion ended, and thank Talos I was able to repair the shield. that would have been embarrassing.

I made the dome collapse and I was greeted by the sound of the cheering adventurers, congratulating both myself and Megumin, who laid face down on the ground, her mana non-existent. I sighed as I picked up Darkness, who had passed out, and threw her on top of a pile of dazed and knocked out adventurers. "I need a fuckin' drink."

Time skip

I sigh as I finish collecting my bounty. Six hundred billion Eris. I can now claim that I am among the richest in the land. "I really should have held back." I muttered to myself as I wander the streets of Axel. "I should check in with Lydia." I said. I held out my hand and muttered, "[Iris message]"

The air in front of me shimmered as I hear the sound of running water. As the air starts to form a picture, I see a waterfall start to form in the background. The message soon becomes clear, and I see one of the falls near Riften, but no sign of Lydia, other than her armor on the edge of the lake. "Oh shit." I said as I tried to cancel the massage, but before I can, Lydia emerges from the lake, completely naked.

Just as the picture vanished, I heard her yell out my name in pure wrath. "I am so in trouble if I ever go home."

And done. I think this is a new record for me. It has this is the longest it took me to write a chapter, and the longest chapter, standing at 2600+ words. sorry it took so long. If you have any questions, just comment and ask!

Next time: Clash with a devil's general!