"Son of a-!" Kaname swore as I slammed him into the ground, pinning my knee to his chest once again.

He glowered at me, his tired eyes holding the annoyance of the day. I held back a smirk, finally feeling better after the hell he put me through. In all fairness it was all in the name of training.

Learning Blood Release is a real pain in my ass that takes a lot of focus, chakra, and of course, practice. By the end of simple manipulation I was coated in sweat and my muscles were all tense.

So when we switched from hand to hand it was a relief. Although this is the thirteenth match and I finally surpassed him.

For a drunk who does nothing, he's a force of nature to go against.

The first three matches he whipped my ass and that took me, Haru, and Hawaki by surprise. Hell. The first match didn't even last a minute. He's incredibly strong physically and almost as fast as me.

Me!

The only person who can outrun me is Lee without his weights. And it took Kaname less than a minute to put me on my ass.

The second and third matches weren't any better but by the fourth I was starting to get a good idea on this.

At least that's what I thought until Kaname slammed the heel of his palm into my jaw and I nearly bit my tongue. Before I could swear myself, he had flipped us around and held my arm tightly behind me back and I grit my teeth in anger. If I move the bones in my arm will shatter.

God damn it! I thought I had him that time.

"You're strong, but I've been doing this a lot longer than you." He released my arm and stepped away. I sighed, stretching my sore body as I stood.

I wore my usual attire, minus my jacket since I was sparring. Kaname had opted for a pair of dark baggy pants that cinch at the ankles and waist, and a sleeveless turtleneck shirt. His arms are bandaged and his messy locks are tied back out of his face. Different from his normal attire.

Makes it easier for him to throw me onto my ass. "As much as it pains me, I'm going to have to cut this short. We better start preparing before it's too late."

Kaname raised an eyebrow, looking towards the house. "I'm still not getting the point in this."

I rolled my eyes and squatted by our stuff and grabbed two water pouches. I tossed him one and began to chug the other before swiping my lips off the liquid.

Kaname is also chugging his. Much like myself he worked up a sweat. Unlike me though it's not as much.

I stared at him wearily and handed him mine. He could use all the water he can get. I wonder if he's sweating out alcohol.

Without much thought he took mine without a fuss and finished it off. "Of course you don't. Listen, it may seem trivial, but we're doing it. I did it the last couple years doing it for Haru and we're doing it for him too. Now c'mon. Help me set things up." I turned and headed towards the house.

Kaname sighed loudly but his feet trudged behind me nonetheless.

The days have been rather busy as of late. With me struggling on getting a hold of this new thing. Kaname is trying, and it is helpful.

But it seems that the rate of my mind succumbing to the Frenzy is concerning. Even for him.

He's taken to having drinks with me at night after the boys go to bed. I don't particularly like it. Even if my blood processes it easily, the idea of drinking my problems away leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

How many times have I had to deal with a drunken Jiraiya or Tsunade? How many times have I had to look after them the next day when the hangover is too much? And the amount of times I poured out their stash?

Jiraiya's not nearly as bad as Tsunade but the man needs to learn moderation.

I'm not against alcohol. I believe it's nice for a casual night, but I'm just a teenager. I don't want that stuff to influence me or my brother for that matter.

But it does help. As bad as that is. It's the only thing he knows that can slow the progress since my meditation hasn't improved.

Anytime I'm left to focus on my mentality the other me appears and tries her damndest to get me to let her loose.

Although it's not as frightening. Because I know Kaname is there, ready to force it back into submission.

His abilities are ridiculous. If he wanted he could easily join high rank ninjas without any trouble. So it's reassuring. Although I'm not making progress, it's still something.

Once inside I headed for the spare room where I study. It's the only room he doesn't go in.

That's where we stored all the decorations. "Alright. Kaname, start by putting these up outside, I'll do the inside. And don't forget the back patio!" I instructed him, handing him three very large boxes.

He grunted when I released them. But he took it without complaining and headed out. I grabbed some others and headed for the living room.

Of course I know that this isn't conventional given the circumstances. But I don't care about that.

He's my friend. My comrade. And this is important.

So despite the situation we're all in I began to hang streamers, lights, and began to decorate the tables. I cleaned early this morning so I was able to do it all rather quickly. And it looked great.

I mean I've been doing this for so many years it's not that hard to make it all look nice very quickly.

Now to start the food. Hawaki isn't really picky when it comes to food, but I'll still be making his favorites. Haru is out keeping him busy with the mission.

Of course they are doing some actual work but it was mostly to keep him out of the house while Kaname and I prepared.

Kaname was still confused about the whole ordeal, but it's because, from what I've learned in one drunken ramble, he's never had, nor experienced a birthday.

I was a bit taken aback because we even celebrated birthdays. My first birthday wasn't really nice or extravagant.

But Naruto had managed to buy two cupcakes despite the shopkeeper's reluctance.

He came home one evening, turned off all the lights and lit one candle while he set them in front of me. With a big grin and fresh bruises from the trip home he told me Happy Birthday.

I didn't know what it was.

We were little. So, so little. I remember we had a hard time finding food because no one would give us any. We were figuring out how to spend the money that was always given to us once a month. And this was even before I learned to fight.

I vaguely remember it.

It wasn't a good time. We struggled to find food and face the hostility they all gave us. Back then most shopkeepers wouldn't even let us inside the stores.

My brother had told me he saw a family doing this. And on the day we are born we should have cake. Of course he couldn't get the entire cake, we hadn't really thought on how to use the money so we were often without.

But he got these and told me something I had never forgotten. It was a heartwarming thing, despite it just being us and two small cupcakes.

After that I had made it a point to learn all I could about it and celebrate it every year with him.

Over time I managed to make it the way that I have.

Of course anytime I tried to celebrate with Sasuke he'd dip out. He made a point not to even see me on the day. He's never been a fan, at least not since the massacre.

But when I befriended and started working with Haru I began to do it.

Three times so far for a matter of fact.

He laughed in confusion the first time but after the second he seemed more relaxed. I know it's ridiculous. There's not really a lot to celebrate but I can't help but put a special meaning on it.

Everyone deserves a birthday. And he's my friend too. My comrade in arms. Hawaki is special. So he's getting a goddamn birthday and he's going to enjoy it.

It took a while but once I finished cooking and cake decorating I headed outside to see how Kaname was doing. The front and side of the house wasn't bad. The patio could use some work.

After we decided to make a stay here, Hawaki and Haru built a patio to hang out on.

They claimed it was from another land that was in style and the two were oddly hyped about it. Of course Kaname was grumpy about it. "Whose house do you think this is? Building things in a man's yard."

But the boys didn't care because this is the only place they could make one and not leave it behind.

Leaving it behind . . .yeah. I can't really imagine staying away from here.

Not from Kaname.

This is our base. No, it's more than a simple base. Although the word I want to say is one I can't. Because if I do I feel like something bad will happen. I'd jinx it.

And I don't want to risk that.

"Hmm. A little sloppy." I assessed it. Kaname, who is struggling with another roll of streamers, shot me a nasty glare. "This took me an hour!" He shouted.

I looked around, shaking my head. "A novice." His temple throbbed and he huffed, turning away. I pointed at the lanterns on the line. "Space those out evenly and don't make it so crooked. I'll fix up the rails and it's good."

It may be a little messier, but it wasn't bad. What matters is that he did it. He didn't even half ass it.

It may not be perfect but he did actually try. And that's what really matters. He bitches a lot and curses us a lot, but he has a soft spot for us. Contrary to what he wants us to think.

It happens I suppose.

How often we've been together. I spend a lot of my time here. Deidara has offered a place to stay in one of their bases but I've declined. He doesn't pry too much and he's not really as secretive as Sasori. So far he hasn't followed me or anything so that's a relief.

Sasori had spied on me for a while so I just took to staying at the base.

Besides he made me work a lot. Like a lot.

Deidara gives me breaks at least. Though most of the time it's because he's on his own mission for the Tailed Beast.

So I took to staying here so I could continue to learn. To learn and to not have to keep my guard up 24/7. Which is a first in a long time.

I've always been on guard since leaving the Leaf. And even then the only place I could truly relax was home. At least for the better part of my childhood. After a while I did gain friends but I had already transformed into who I am.

Before I could fight Naruto had to take the harshness of it all to save me from it.

I couldn't even throw a punch, however such a young child shouldn't be able to. But after seeing Naruto get knocked around a lot I took to learning and then I became a force to be reckoned with.

Not many kids could hold their own in a fight against me, so they stopped picking them.

Hm?

Tilting my head I sniffed the air. "The boys are back. They'll be here shortly. Help me bring the food and drinks out here." I hurried into the kitchen, Kaname, grumbling, followed me and we hurriedly set out all the food and dishes, along with drinks.

Then we hurried around to the front of the house in time to hear the boys.

"Pochi, take your hands away or so help me god-!" I sniffled a laugh. They emerged from the treeline, Haru behind Hawaki, his hands placed over his eyes.

Haru snickered, eyes finding mine almost instantly as he winked. "No can do. Boss's orders." Hawaki groaned, letting Haru lead him to the front of the house.

"Crazy Girl, what are you two up to?" He demanded impatiently. I smirked and nodded to Haru.

He quickly released him and Hawaki looked around, stunned. Haru hopped next to me and we moved our hands a bit. "Surprise. Happy birthday Hawaki." We spoke.

Kaname blew a little noise maker instead of speaking alongside us.

Hawaki blinked, looking at the decked out front of the house. "What . . ? You-you knew my birthday?" He asked, clearly not over his shock.

I raised an eyebrow, nodding. "Yeah, Haru told me. You think we don't even know the basics? C'mon. Let's go inside and head to the back and start the party." He didn't move, staring at the decorations spelling out the celebration.

Seeing as he wasn't moving I reached over, grabbed his hand and pulled him along, the other two following. We moved through the house, the boys taking in more decorations that littered the entire dwelling.

Hawaki remained speechless as I headed for the back door and led him out.

Haru went towards my study to gather the gifts we had gotten him and Hawki took in the decorated patio, still too shocked to speak. Was it really this surprising?

Haru trotted out, holding five boxes, a grin on his face as he took it in, letting out a whistle. "You guys did great." He complimented, placing the presents on the table next to the food.

Hawaki drifted over, taking in all of it. "These are . . . my favorites."

Huh? Did he not expect me to tell what foods he liked better than others? "Of course. It's your day." Kaname spoke, sitting down and making a plate.

Haru and I followed his lead. Hawaki hesitated before taking the seat next to me. I passed him some bowls as the other two were finished.

"Really though. You're finally our age once again. The big 1-6. You missed my party. Miyu had thrown it at the base and we had a karaoke thing. Have you ever heard her sing? It's hilarious-ow! I was joking." He defended, rubbing his head that I reached across to smack.

I'm not particularly horrendous at singing. I'm definitely not great, but Haru loves to sing so I set some things up and made a karaoke type of thing.

"He's just silent. I was trying to break the tension. Miyu's really good at singing angry songs." I narrowed my blue eyes on him.

Is that a jab at me being angry all the time?

"You did this at the base?" Hawaki finally spoke a she began to eat. I nodded, slurping at my soba noodles. "Yep. Every year."

Kabuto hated it. He thought it was a waste of time and resources. But he's not my boss. Orochimaru didn't say anything so I continued to do so. Even if Sasuke chastised me.

I don't care.

It's a day worth celebrating and Haru appreciated it.

"But . . ." He seemed at a loss for words. We let him think over what he wanted to say, all of us understanding this to an extent. "We don't exactly . . . know each other very well."

I snorted, staring at him. "Hawaki, we've been together for a couple months now. You're our friend. Our teammate. That's all we really need to know to do this." I gestured to the whole shebang.

Haru nodded, coming to my aid. "Yeah. We're not exactly strangers at this point. We eat, sleep, and train together everyday. What do you mean we don't know each other?"

It's true that Hawaki has kept his past to himself, only mentioning it once. All we know is that he had lost everyone to Orochimaru.

And what we know is from when we met him till now. "Well, I mean. I thought . . ." He was having difficulty finding the right words and it showed on his face. The pain, confusion, guilt. I tilted my head and turned in my seat to face him.

"Hawaki, you're a very special and irreplaceable person to us. We care about you. That's why we did this. I don't need to know who you were before to know that you're one of my best friends." His lips pressed in a line as he stared at his bowl of noodles, unable to look at me.

What's wrong with him? I thought he'd be happy or at least a little bit. Birthdays always made me feel happy when my brother and I celebrated it.

And Haru loved his as well. Why is this making him feel that way? "Even if I'm only here because things seemed interesting?" He finally asked.

Haru and I glanced at each other before back at him. "Well of course. It doesn't matter. You're our friend." Haru told him.

I nodded in agreement pointing my chopsticks at Kaname. "Even he's fond of you. He did all of these decorations outside" I motioned to it all. Kaname didn't say anything, just ate some chicken tempura.

"Be grateful. You're cared about to have all this done for you. Just accept it and have fun with it." He shrugged, not looking at any of us as he ate.

Ha. He didn't imply he didn't care about him.

Big softie.

Hawaki cast his gaze downwards confusing us. Then, to all of our shock, tears fell. As quickly as they came they stopped as he reeled in his own emotions.

He looked back at us, closed his eyes and smiled. "Thanks."

Hawaki . . . Smiling lightly, I reached over and grabbed his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. My brother's words on our first celebrated birthday echoed gently in my mind and I found myself speaking.

"Thanks for being born, Hawaki."

~

I watched as Hawaki and Kaname were in a shuriken contest. So many targets were moving along a system Haru and I designed so they weren't easy to hit. The two are pretty heated up seeing as their both excellent shots.

Haru sat next to me, holding out a cold beverage. I gratefully accepted it and we watched.

"You know, I can't really blame him for his reaction. From what I know Orochimaru really screwed him over. Destroyed his life, experimented on him and killed his closest friends. He's had it rough."

This is true. He did have it rough. But looking at the four of us I know that all of us have our fair share of demons. Our own anxieties and wariness along with the monsters we're all constantly facing from our past.

We have never pushed Hawaki to open up. To know about his past.

There are some things that we want to keep to ourselves. And some things that are too difficult to speak of right now.

But that's okay. No matter what it is, Hawaki is one of us.

One of us.

My gaze drifted from our Sound Ninja to Kaname who smirked and smugly taunted Hawaki who scored less than him at the recent target. Then my gaze went to Haru.

Haru had always been beside me every step of the way. I always think about my friends back at the Leaf. My brother, Sakura, Choji, Shikamaru, the whole Rookie Ten. And of course Lee and his group.

When I think of friends I always go to them. But Haru is the one who has always been beside me since joining up. No matter what I say or the horrible things I do, he still stands beside me.

And Hawaki, new or not, is the same way. He didn't run when he found out about the Frenzy and he knows as well as Haru the possibility of me succumbing to it for good is there.

But he still stays.

I can't imagine either of the boys away from my side. They're far too precious to me. And Kaname. Kaname, who hated us in the beginning, is joking with Hawaki in front of us.

This life right here is the same one I wanted at the Leaf.

They're my family. I would gladly die for any of these guys. When did that happen?

But I'm really not that surprised anymore. Right now, I'm content.

"Yeah. But he has us now." I said. Haru smiled, nodding in agreement as we watched Hawki throw his hands up in anger. "Pochi, avenge me!" Hawaki shouted, turning to us as Kaname smugly twirled two senbon needles in one hand.

Haru chuckled but stood from his seat next to me and swapped with Hawaki. "I'll make this quick." Kaname spoke arrogantly.

I laughed as the two started and Hawaki sat next to me as they went. "Man, for a lazy drunk he's difficult to beat." He grumbled.

I chuckled, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, tell me about it. Training with him is hell." He's on par with Kakashi-Sensei.

We watched as Kaname began to up the intensity. You see, Haru is a master at weapons. He's kind of like Ten-Ten, but far superior. We watched in comfortable silence for a while before Hawaki spoke.

"Thank you, really I mean it. I was so surprised. No one, not since Taro and Rini, has done anything for it."

There's that name, Taro again. Still, I didn't want to force him to tell me when he's clearly still not ready.

"Y'know, I've lost just about everyone close to me. So when I joined you on this mission, well with how dangerous things are, I always assumed, if not one, all of us would die. So I- I don't know. But you two are interesting. No, that's not it. You see, when you guys said I'm special to you . . .it meant a lot. Really."

He's not great at expressing himself. Well I can't say much about that either.

I always have the tendency to hold things in. I'm not the best at expressing myself either.

"Hawaki, you're our precious comrade. Our friend. There's always a chance that we'll die, but I'd do anything for you two. I know we haven't been together the longest but it holds true. Haru, Kaname, we all care about you. Forming relationships always have that chance of pershing but it's still just a chance." I told him.

I can't promise him I won't die. Because if I don't die on this mission, I'll definitely die when I surrender myself and pay for my crimes with my head.

I was always going to die an early death.

But that doesn't mean the present is pointless. These bonds are what helps us grow. It gives us a purpose.

Not having one with anyone is just cold and lonely. Only filled with misery. You can't really experience life to its fullest without any.

"Yeah. I see that. Thank you Miyuna. This is the best birthday I've had." He hasnt called me by my name since our meeting.

There was an emotional tone in his voice and I knew he finally had a door to his wall.

All of us have walls. It's important and sometimes necessary. But not having anyway through it is the same as not getting attached to a single person.

Lonely.

I'm glad that he doesn't have to be alone anymore. If I didn't have Naruto in my life, I don't know what I'd have done or how I'd turn out. "Anytime." I said.

Kaname's swearing broke the moment and Haru's whooping followed. We turned to see Kaname glaring menacingly at Haru who's kunai's never strayed from the path of victory

Hawaki and I laughed at their actions and the tension he had at the beginning faded to nothing.

The path we're on is dark and painful. So I'm glad we have this moment to bathe in the light of happiness and finally relax.

They all deserve it. And I . . . I think I do too.

Kaname pointed at me. "Student! You just going to let this chump show up your teacher like that?!" He demanded.

I chuckled and stood, glancing down at Hawaki and giving him a wink before I strode over.

Haru's eyes glinted as Kaname and I high fived as we passed each other. I reached into my pouch and twirled my kunai around my index finger as Haru gripped his.

"How about another tie breaker?"