The pounding in my head was what first made me remember that I exist, and this blank nothingness is just the result of me being unconscious.

Disappointment filled me next. Not existing was nice. But now all my stress is back. And this killer headache isn't helping.

With some struggle, I managed to peel my eyes open. Surprisingly there wasn't a bright white ceiling or the blinding light of the sun.

I blinked a few times to readjust my eyesight before glancing around. I'm currently under a large, shaded tree. A thin blanket is placed over me and I think there's a pack under my head.

I went to sit up but pain exploded throughout my body so I stayed still.

Haru and Hawaki's chakra is nearing, so I guess they'll tell me where we are.

"That inn was super nice. Why couldn't we stay there?" I heard Hawaki ask, annoyance clear as day in his voice.

"We can't stay in one place too long. We're not out of this land and what with Tsuyoshi's passing and Keigo's near death, we're being hunted down." Haru sighed.

He sounds stressed. Probably because I was unconscious and couldn't take it myself.

Guilt flooded through me. "Yeah. Crazy Girl sure knows how to make friends." Hawaki's comment made my eye twitch, but I couldn't argue.

He's right.

The two neared and rounded the tree, a small deer slung over Haru's shoulder and two rabbits over Hawaki's.

Seems they've been busy. "Yeah. Miyu's an amazon. So making enemies is second nature to her. A real demon. If her boyfriend wasn't as hostile she would not be dating." Haru said with a shrug.

My temple throbbed. "Besides. I've been with her for years. I'm pretty sure she's immortal at this point."

"Your concern is flattering. Really." I rolled my eyes.

Haru jumped up with a shrill shriek. Hawaki grinned. "Hey, look who's alive!" I ignored him and raised an eyebrow at Haru, who had placed a hand over his heart.

"You trying to give me a heart attack?!" He squeaked.

Hawaki sighed and sat down next to me, tossing his catch over at Haru who fumbled to catch them. "How're you holding up? I'm not the best at Medical Ninjutsu and Poochi is even more useless then he already is."

"Hey!" Haru cried out.

We ignored him. Like always.

"Well; other than the fact that I feel like I'm dying, just peachy." I forced myself to sit up, ignoring the pain. "How long was I out?" I questioned.

Haru crouched down and began to work on the animals. "Four days. You are not easy to carry."

I snatched Hawaki's tanto and threw it at Haru. He ducked, narrowly avoiding his head becoming a pin cushion.

"What?! Oh, I wasn't calling you fat or anything. Though you're not as light as Karin." He mumbled the last part.

Hawaki's brow furrowed and made a motion with his hands. "Why? Why do you do this?"

I glared daggers at Haru. "I will kill you." I threatened.

Sorry if I'm not as petite as Karin, or Ino, or Sakura, or any other kunoichi. Sorry I'm taller and have actual muscles.

Ungrateful brat.

"Our problem was carrying not only an unconscious person, but the Land of Rock's most wanted. Makes travelling difficult." Hawaki stated.

"Hm." I hummed absent mindlessly. My gaze drifted to the fire Haru had started.

He had already skinned the small deer and was starting to cook it. He turned to me, a lazy smile on his face. "Missing the hubby already? Careful, you're starting to sound like him." I rolled my eyes at him but a smile of my own slipped onto my face.

I do miss him. Especially now more than ever. This whole thing is getting to me. I just . . . I just need to hug him.

But I can't. He's on a mission. And he . . . he's still working through his own stuff. I can't burden him even more with my problems. I just wish I could at least see him. Hold his hand. Hug him. I just need him.

I miss him.

"Here." I blinked as a stick with some cooked meat was thrust in front of me. I glanced at Haru who had a small smile on his face. A knowing look in his eyes.

He always knows when I'm bothered. When I'm thinking about Sasuke, Naruto, or even Itachi. I can always count on him.

I trust him, he's my friend, we've been through a lot together. But I can't burden him either. He was my only ally. He chose to help me over immediately going to Karin's side.

And the girl means the whole world to him. "Thanks." I took a bite out of it.

He passed one to Hawaki before getting a piece for himself. It was silent for a bit.

Unfortunately it was broken.

"Okay. I'm sorry, I know I agreed not to bring it up, but what was with that whole thing?" Hawaki asked, putting down his food.

Haru shot him a look before smacking his arm. I sighed. "It's fine Haru. He has a right to ask. To know. Both of you do."

I just don't really want to talk about it.

Haru's been nice enough to let me go at my own pace and never pressuring me to tell him. Even though I know it's been bothering him since the first time. And those little instances when I became distracted with trying to push the voice back? Yeah, it's killing him not to ask.

"Well it shouldn't be too surprising. Orochimaru did lots of experiments on everyone. You, Haru, me. Nobody was really safe. But a couple of weeks before the whole coup d'etat he did a certain experiment on me. He was working on reviving a Blood Release technique. It sparked something in me. But it wasn't until later when Kabuto finished the ceremony did this happen."

Even the memory of the blood bath makes me want to throw up and it stirs something up in me. The other me.

"So this Blood Release makes you . . . go crazy? Well, crazier than usual." I shot my dagger glare over at Hawaki who threw his hands up in defense.

I ground my teeth as I tried to calm my anger. It's not like I can argue.

"I hate to say it, but yeah. There's something going on with my mind because of the experiment and there's no way to handle it because there's no known user and Orochimaru was using me to figure it out. That's why Sasori was helping me and he even found another user before his death. But when he died I had to change my plans and look for Itachi-"

"Wait, hold up a minute. You mean to tell me you knew there was another user who could help you, but you chose to ignore it because your boyfriend has brother issues?" Haru asked, a deep frown on his face.

Well, when you put it like that . . .

"My personal feelings shouldn't matter. We're on a mission and that comes first." I began, but Hawaki shook his head.

"That's the Shinobi way, yeah, but we're technically Rogue Ninja. So that doesn't apply to us." He began with a small smile.

Haru nodded in agreement. "What applies to us is your well being. Your mental state is more important."

I was about to argue, but Haru shot me a look and continued. "You aren't telling us everything, and you can't. I get that. But there's someone you can talk to and who can help you."

"We're your team. And we don't want our comrade to go completely bonkers. So if that means putting a halt on this search just to get your bearings together then so be it." Hawaki backed Haru up.

Ugh. Since when do they give me talks about my well being? That's my job. Especially with these two who are always acting like a bunch of monkeys.

Since when did they become the adults in this ragtag group?

Haru held his hand out, an expectant look on his face. "There was a piece of paper you were looking at before we set off on the journey. It was from Sasori about the other user, right? Give it."

I raised an eyebrow at his demand. Who does he think he is? I could snap him like a twig.

His eye twitched, realizing his mistake. "Okay let me rephrase that. Please hand it over?" Grumbling incoherently under my breath, I reached into my pouch and grabbed the letter.

But as I did, a sudden jolt of fear crossed me at the sudden emptiness in the pouch. "The spear!" I shouted, jumping onto my feet.

No! If that falls into the wrong hands then-! "Hey, chill. I grabbed it. As best as I could at least." Haru unclipped his pouch and handed it to me.

"Could you uh, get it out? I can't really grab it." It was then I noticed his hand was wrapped in bandages. I see. So he knows about it.

We exchanged items. I knew the moment his pouch was in my hands it was in there. Even in a scroll, it's aura reached out.

"Um, what's with that spear?" He asked, watching me attentively as I took the scroll out and put it in my pouch. "I'm not sure. But I'm pretty sure Orochimaru wanted it. That's why I took it. So he wouldn't get it."

Even now I worry about putting it back. Those people were right to guard it. It should never be in anyone's hands.

Especially mine.

He didn't say anything else as he looked over the short letter. It's not like I could tell him more about it. I don't even know what's wrong with it.

A weapon with chakra in it that makes its handler into a battle crazy lunatic. Mix that with a mentaly unstable, bloodthirsty, freak; well, let's just say that's not the ideal combo.

God I have problems. And to think my anger issues was the number one thing holding me back. Now it's barely on the radar.

What a pain. Everything has become a giant mess and I have no one else to blame.

I chose this. I chose everything that I've done and allowed.

Suck it up.

"Yep. Just like Sasori to write a note this short." Haru spoke, tossing me the letter. There was a pang in my chest at the mention of my mentor.

My . . . Sensei.

"Actually his underling. But I guess he's that way because of how Sasori is." I said, shoving the letter back in my pouch. "Well on the bright side, we're actually very close to the Land of Bears. Maybe a day and a half." He said, digging into another piece of meat.

Hawaki, who had taken to cleaning the rabbits while Haru and I were talking, began to cook them.

"I've been there once in passing. Me and my friend were out on a mission." He informed us, not taking his eyes off the roasting rabbits.

Haru and I exchanged glances before looking back at him.

I only know about what Haru's mentioned about him. I'm aware many of his friends ended up dying due to Orochimaru's experiments or missions, but Hawaki tends to keep his past to himself.

He's never voluntarily told us anything about himself other than what he's feeling at the moment.

I don't blame him. We haven't been together long, just a couple of weeks. I certainly don't open up. The only time I did was when we first met, and that was to try and get him to join me.

And with this whole mess in my head? Yeah, I haven't even scratched the surface of that. Not even with Haru and I've known him for about three years.

Careful not to make a big deal of it, I decided to ask him something. "What's it like? You know the terrain?" I questioned.

He simply nodded. "Yeah. Taro and I were undercover for a while. It's wedged between the Land of Wind and the Land of Earth. It's a foresty place with lots of chasms. They're often filled with poisonous gasses so it's not the most habitable place. But it works with hiding."

A lightbulb went off in Haru's head at the mention of this Taro. But there's still some confusion.

I recognize that look. He's heard the name but doesn't remember where exactly from.

"Something tells me that those chasms are the key to finding Kaname." I deduced. Well I'm not too worried.

I've worked with Sasori, the best poison expert around. I have all sorts of antidotes on me because I have three puppets on me. With each poison you have you should always carry the antidote for it.

Sasori taught me that.

~

"I'm telling you, it's a lie!" Haru argued vehemently. Hawaki sneered. "I'm telling you it's true!" He countered.

I rubbed my temples, hoping to rid the headache. "Guys, seriously, shut up and stay focused." I repeated.

But of course they didn't listen. Again.

"Karin does not like that Uchiha!" Haru shouted, his anger spiking as he spat out Sasuke's name. In normal circumstances, I would've wailed on him for talking about Sasuke that way. But I understand his love for Karin rivals even my own love for Sasue, Naruto, and all my other friends.

Other than me, she's all he has.

Plus Hawaki is kinda right. Karin may be a tsundere, but like most she doesn't hide it well. "I don't get why you're so into her! She's rude, violent, has the absolute worst temper, and she willingly helped that damn Orochimaru!"

How we got onto this subject is that we had received word from Sasuke that he has his crew all together finally.

Well, not so much as word from him, but Karin. She didn't really write the friendliest letter either. I mean Sasuke isn't all touchy feely, but his is straight down to business.

She, well, was very demeaning which pissed me off, sure, but it pissed Hawaki off too. Especially since she was left in charge of a base and willingly followed Orochimaru's orders.

Plus, were all a little on edge because we've been searching the chasms but haven't found anything. So Karin's harsh words struck a chord.

And Hawaki isn't afraid to speak his mind.

"Hey! Miyu once Rasengan me because I was chewing too loudly! I wasn't, it's chips! It'll make some sound! Karin is not that bad!"

Hawaki snorted at that. "Karin literally tested out a serum on me because I corrected her!" The two continued to bicker.

My temple throbbed in annoyance and I turned quickly, punching both of them on the head. "OW!" They cried out.

Rubbing their heads, they shot me a quick glare which diminished upon seeing the look on my face. "If you two don't shut up I will rip out your tongues, fry it, then eat it in front of you!" I shouted.

Their mouths clamped shut, signaling they understood.

God damn. Do they always gotta be so annoying? It's like Naruto and Sasuke fighting every time we met up on missions.

Except with them, they were trying to establish dominance in the group. These two are just idiots. But it sure does bring me back.

Hm? My nose twitched as the familiar scent of sake drifted into my nostrils.

Ugh. There's a lot of it too. Reminds me of Grandma Tsunade.

I sniffed the air, locking onto the chakra entwined with it. Smells like burning wood. It's actually very soothing.

The sake wafted into my nose again and I cringed. Well, it would be soothing if not for that.

Damn it smells like Granny's on a bender again. I mean, I like Grandma Tsunade, but that woman has a drinking problem.

And so does this person apparently.

I better check on them to make sure they didn't drink themselves to death. Granny has this insane tolerance, but anyone else would for sure die of alcohol poisoning.

I should know, Pervy Sage almost croaked last time the two went at it in a bar.

"Miyu? Where are you going?" Haru asked as I started jogging off in the direction the scent was coming from. I ignored him and continued.

It didn't take long for me to reach it. Actually the scent led just outside a small village not that far from a chasm.

A man is leaned against a tree, empty bottles around him. I slowed from a jog to a walk and watched him closely.

He's slumped over, and he has his hair tied in a low ponytail. It's long enough for it, but not that long. Some of it escaped and hung over his eyes. There's some stubble on his face and chin, clearly he's in need of a shave.

Crouching down in front of him, I get a better look at him. He's older, but not so much. Maye late twenties. With bags under his closed eyes. He's pale, but not naturally. Kind of sickly.

He's still breathing, so that's a plus.

"Hey, mister. This isn't a good place to sleep." I gently shook his shoulder. He mumbled incoherently a bit before opening his dark blue eyes. "What do you want kid?" He slurred.

I frowned. Well isn't he a ray of sunshine. Should've just left him here alone. Hell, I should just leave right now.

But there's just something about him.

He's . . . sad to look at. Drunk when it's still daylight, obviously doesn't take care of himself, and just . . . alone.

I can't just leave him.

Sighing, I grabbed his arm and slung it over my shoulder and my other arm wrapped around his waist before helping him stand.

Feels like he isn't eating right. So I guess I was right. "Where's your house? I'll walk you back." I told him.

Haru and Hawaki looked at us with raised eyebrows. Clearly asking with their eyes why I was doing this.

"I don't need help from a kid." He mumbled. Despite his claim he didn't fight and actually used me as support.

Thought so. "Yeah, you're so convincing." I said sarcastically with an eyeroll. "Girls and their sarcasm."

My temple throbbed and I jabbed him in the ribs. If I didn't have a hold on him he'd have fallen flat on his face.

He hissed in pain, shooting me an annoyed look. "I'd just tell her where and keep quiet. Miyu's got a temper." Haru suggested.

Him and Hawaki trailed behind us. "Great. A girl with a temper and a couple of skirt chasers."

Does all he do is complain? "Hey!" Haru cried. Well I guess in this dudes defense, they do look like Casanova's.

Sometimes they act like it too. Especially Haru.

"Enough complaining. Where do you live?" I demanded. He was silent for a bit before straightening some, still using me for support. "Just south of here. Not too far. It's a small cott." He admitted begrudgingly.

I smirked, looking up at him. "Now that wasn't so hard now was it?" It was said with some haughtiness, but honestly, not as mean as I could have been. That's odd.

He glanced down at me briefly before looking forward. "Whatever."

Geez. What a downer.

"Oh, her mister." Hawaki began. Irritation crossed the mans face. "Don't call me mister brat. Makes me feel like an old man."

Well he's not old per say. But he drinks like one soooo . . . "Do you by chance know a man named Kaname?" He continued, ignoring the 'brat' comment which I knew bothered him.

The man stiffened slightly before relaxing to hide it.

But I noticed.

"So you do know him." I spoke before he could deny it. My grip around his waist tightened, just enough to show I know.

He pursed his lips. "What do you want with him?" He asked.  So he admits he knows him. Good.

"He's the only person who can help me with a problem. My Sensei told me to find him here." I informed him.

I didn't see the problem of telling him that much. It could be about anything.

The man sighed loudly. "You must be who that man was talking about. Well, I guess you can stop looking, you found him." 

.

.

.

What?

This guy's him? The last known Blood Release user? Powerful, bloodthirsty, unstoppable war machine?!

"No way. You . . ." Hawaki pointed at him, eyes wide. The man nodded, still looking forward.

"Yeah. I'm Kaname."