A week later

Trying to gain back our relationship to the way it used to be hasn't been easy. We have made some exercises that Miranda, my therapist, recommended. Mostly, improving our communication skills that were failing miserably in the past few months.

Mostly, the most important thing is to not keep anything that you feel to yourself and try to understand the other.

So far, it has helped us, fully.

Still, we have decided to take things slow. We haven't had sex, even when we are sleeping in the same bed. We're focusing on other types of intimacy. Spending time together, sharing moments and mostly having long sessions of just talking with each other.

I bought a book about the languages of love and I have been reading it non-stop, I've shared what I have learned with Harry too. Turns out Harry and me have different types of love, the one you wish to receive.

Like, I prefer having him around for support, having him near me it's very important. And him, he is more physical and communicative, he likes a hug equally as an "everything will be okay". Simple things but, once you learned how the other wants to be loved, the relationship starts getting better.

Now, I see him more telling me: "Don't worry, I help" when it comes to chores or Jack, even though Jack prefers me more when it's time to sleep. And now, I express my love through kisses and hugs, and talking to him more.

It also has helped us to understand what the other wants, like giving each other some space even when we spend the whole day together.

Harry is boxing right now, I'm watching him inside the gym while I'm laying down by the pool with Jack in his kid's pool. There's something about watching him exercise, he looks really sexy when he is concentrated.

I start feeling heat up, so I turn my head somewhere else.

After a couple of minutes I stand up, putting on my button up shirt and holding Jack around a towel, he's starting to look like a raisin. I made my way to the kitchen, sitting him down on his chair and getting us both some juice.

"Here you go monkey." I say placing his bottle filled with juice on his table.

I sip mine, it helps me to erase the image of Harry punching that bag from my head. I mean, it's not bad to look at him and find him irresistible, it's a good thing, but it's not what I want to focus right now.

When I finish the juice and wash the cup, I hear steps inside of the house, when I turn around I find Harry walking inside of the kitchen, shirtless.

Oh my.

"Babe. Have you seen my protein powder?" He asks while I look straight at his abs.

After a few seconds of not responding he notices I'm staring at him.

"Do you like what you see, babe?" He says turning to look at me, taking a step front towards me.

I take a step back also, hiding my smile. I really find him attractive.

"You're sweaty." I say, trying to keep him away.

"Mhm. And?" He takes another step, I'm almost caged between the kitchen counter and him. He suddenly grabs my shirt and moves it away, the front of my body exposing.

"And-" I start saying but he then puts his face in the crook of my neck, I sigh closing my eyes, trying not to touch him.

"Tell me what you want, don't keep it from me. Remember?" He says lowly, close to my ear making me feel his hot breath, using Miranda's speech against me. "Tell me."

I bite my bottom lip. I finally move my hands to his stomach, feeling the trace of his abs between my fingers. I try to remember that he is physical, he likes my touch and I'm not going to lie, I really like to touch him.

"I want you." I say, moving my eyes up to look at him. "But- we should-"

"Shh." He says placing a finger over my lips. "We can still, make out."

And with that he takes my face in his hands and kisses me. Without controlling it I dig my nails a bit on his chest, enjoying the kiss and the movement of his tongue around mine.

He's right, we can still fool around without having sex and I oh so enjoy it.

"Tigress, easy." He says, stopping the kiss and looking down at his stomach. "We don't want to go any further that this."

"Yeah." I say, slowly opening my eyes with a smile on my lips.

My hormones also make me even worse than I would be normally. I would die to rip the rest of his clothes out of his body, but I have to control myself.

Suddenly, we hear plastic crashing on the floor and we both turn our heads instantly.

"Oozzie." Jack laughs pointing to the floor.

"Oopsie, yeah!" Harry goes to him, taking the bottle from the floor. He then looks at me, a flirty look on his face. "We will finish this later, I'm taking a shower."

I nod my head, remembering now that we have to go have lunch with Glenne and Jeff, so I better get myself ready too.

After dressing Jack I focus on picking a dress, nowadays it's the only thing I wear but mostly because I get tired when I have to move a lot. Putting on jeans takes effort and now I'm tired all the time. Right now, I'm looking for a pair of shoes that I left near the bed that ended up going under it.

I have to sit up, my head was getting dizzy by being kneeled on the floor. Harry walks out of the bathroom already dressed, looking down at me.

"What are you doing there?" He asks, running a towel through his hair.

"Dizziness. I'm okay now." I say, taking a deep breath and then standing up, holding my slower back. Each time I stand up the weight of the belly gets to me.

"You sure? We can always cancel and see them some other time." He says and I shake my head, finally putting on my shoes.

"I'm okay, I'm being honest." I say looking at myself in the mirror, I look okay.

"Well, let's go then. I'm taking Jack with me." He says and I nod my head, going to look for my bag and my earrings.

The drive to the restaurant it's actually not that long and I'm glad, I'm starting to get hungry and bean is too, he is moving a lot. Harry notices me holding my belly, so he instinctively moves his hand to my belly as well, just where my hand is placed.

"Woah he's being wild in there." He says and I chuckle. "Isn't it weird? To have something inside of you moving?"

"I mean, yeah. It feels like if you had an alien thing inside of you, only that- he's a little tiny human." I say, bean stops moving finally.

"It's magical." Harry pats the belly and continues on driving.

We arrive to the restaurant and we go inside, we find Jeff and Glenne already in the table. We greet each other's with hugs and sit down, Jack in his own tall chair. We order some drinks and I start looking at the menu already, I'm famished.

"So, how's the life in the new house? Great isn't it?" Jeff says, closing his menu. "You guys did a great job with it."

"I like it, it was all Sienna's job really." Harry adds.

"I still feel like it's a little too big but I'm getting used to it." I say, holding Harry's hand over the table. I can say I'm very lucky.

"Well, we actually wanted to tell you guys thar-" Glenne starts saying, turning to look at Jeff. "We are moving as well. It's right across yours, two streets away."

"What! Really?" I say with a smile on my face. I'm actully happy, Glenne is one of the few friends I have in here apart from Jake.

"Yes, and-" Jeff adds, and with that, Glenne moves her left hand up, showing us both a big ring on her finger.

"Oh my God! Glenne!" I say excitedly, Harry stands up to hug Jeff and I do the same with her. We weren't expecting these news today.

After congratulating them we sit down again, I remember she once told me that she thought it was never going to happen, that he wasn't that kind of guy. We then order our food, just in time the basket of bread arrives to the table.

"When did it happen? How? I feel left out." Harry says as a joke, taking a sip from his beer.

"Well, last weekend. We're keeping it a secret, my father doesn't know yet." Jeffs says and with that, the table divides in two conversations as usual. Me with Glenne, and Jeff with Harry.

"I told you he was going to do it!" I say to her, she smiles to herself.

"It was the biggest surprise ever. It was simple but, I didn't expect it as you may already know." She says, still smiling. "We were having coffee in the morning, I usually drink it outside looking at the ocean. He proposed right there and then, saying 'I want to spend all the rest of my mornings with you' and so on."

I smile dreamily. It makes me think about when Harry proposed. It was beautiful, even though I ended up throwing up and finding out I was pregnant for the second time.

"I'm really happy for you both." I smile to her, I really am.

She continues telling me about his proposal of moving together in a new home, and even when I'm trying to stay focused on what she's saying to me, I still can't erase the fact that I said no to Harry when he proposed.

I know it was the right decision, because I can't even imagine how it would have turned out to be after him being away, with all the things with Jen and me going back to help Jake. We still have a lot to live, to understand and learn about each other.

Eventually our food arrives, so we all start eating. Even Jack, we ordered some spaghetti for him, Harry is now feeding him tiny bits.

But now looking at Glenne and at her shining ring, I get kind of jealous. Not because I have anything to be jealous about, I have a great life. A handsome talented boyfriend, a baby and one on the way, a home with him and a journey ahead of us. But, it makes me think of the 'what if' of my decision.

I go back to the conversation, noticing that Jeff is now talking about something they should discuss some other time.

"What something?" I ask, blinking away my thoughts.

"Errr- it's work babe, don't worry." Harry says but I hold his hand. When he connects his eyes with me he understands that I want to know, now. "Remember about- the thing with Jen?"

"Mhm. What about it?" I stop chewing.

"Um. My dad feels like it's better if they keep being seen together. Just for a couple of weeks more." Jeffs says, he clears his throat to continue. "Then, we will discuss about letting your pregnancy out in the news too. I know it's not the time to talk about work but, my dad insisted."

"Yeah, I think it's better if we finish this conversation tomorrow." Harry says to me and this time I agree, that even erased my appetite.

I don't know where was my head the rest of the meal but it definitely was somewhere else. Somewhere called Jen.

We leave the restaurant after and hour or so, right now we are driving, an awfully quiet ride.

Harry notices, I feel the tension growing each minute that passes. When we arrive home, I take a deep breath before going inside. I know there's a little sincere talk when we enter.

"Sienna." Harry says as soon as I step inside. How I know him.

"I know what you're going to say." I stop, I notice Jack fighting back his eyes, he is still numb by the drive, it soothes him.

"I just want to talk to you. We have been so great at it lately, this time is no different." He says, moving Jack to his chest so he can rest his head on his shoulder. "Babe, you know I don't have a choice. They know what they're doing."

"You can do something! You can always say that you don't want to be a part of it anymore. I-" I sigh, I try to remain calm and to say exactly what I feel. "I don't like it. Even if it's a lie, it's uncomfortable for me."

"Let me put Jack on his crib." Harry says and climbs the stairs. I follow him up, but going inside of our room instead.

I wait for him on the bed, resting my back. When he enters, he sits next to me, running a hand through his hair.

"You know, today at lunch with the news of their engagement I got... I got a little jealous." Harry starts saying, it actually surprised me. "I understand that we are not ready, but still it got me thinking. That's what I want with you. I want you to be wearing a ring that shows my compromise with you. A promise of loving the rest of my life."

He makes a pause, I look at him, his eyes still darted to the floor.

"I know we're not ready. I know. But just keep in mind, at all times, that that's my promise to you. Even..." He sighs, finally looking at me. His eyes look broken. "Even if I have to pretend to date Jen for the sake of us. I already told you, she's just a friend and nothing more. To the public eye, a distraction. But in my eyes, there's only one girl. You."

He then takes the same box I saw a few months ago and places it open on the side table. The ring shining in the little box. I get a knot in my throat. I never expected this day to turned this way, to end up having such a serious talk.

"When the time comes, I will ask you again. But for now, I think this can stay here for as long as you need to." He says, holding my hand that was resting on my leg. "As a reminder of my promise to you. Whatever happens outside-"

"I trust you." I say, I can already feel tears forming in my eyes. He is the perfect man, he knows me so well to say just what I needed to hear. "I believe in you. Please don't, don't doubt about it again."

I try to reassure him, then I go forward to wrap my arms around him.

"I love you." I say, it's been a while since the last time I told him that.

"Oh, baby. I love you too." He hides his face in the crook of my neck, wrapping me in his arms again.

We stay like that for an unknown amount of time, I just want him to know that I believe him.

Yes, I still don't like the idea of him being seen with Jen, but I have to believe him. There's nothing he can't do. It reminds me of the past when we had to be apart because management controlled everything we did, but once again, the past also brought us here. Together. And that's all that matters.

We, us, together.

-

PS: hi.